Taken
by loopylou992
Summary: Edward makes one mistake, just one. But he soon learns he must pay for it and in a way that he never thought possible. Forced to lie to his family and Bella, will he manage to survive being Taken? 2nd Place in Energize WIP Awards.
1. Prologue

Prologue

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or any of these characters. No copyright infringement is intended**

Somehow, I had managed to make it out of the cell where I was being kept. The young girl, who brought me, what passed for food, thought I was asleep; she hadn't locked the door behind her properly. I had obviously built up some level of trust with my captors, or maybe she had made a mistake. I knew that once this is discovered, she will be in trouble. For a split second, I felt sorry for her. She will, no doubt, pay for the mistake, but I have to think of myself now. My pity can't be spared on anyone. I need all my energy.

I knew that chances like this will not come again soon. I was sick; sick of being here, sick of pretending that I was okay, and sick of being treated like an object. I staggered out of the cell, that was holding me, to find that I was trapped in a dimly lit maze. I started running for my life.

I began to think, _"__I __can't __escape __because __there __are __too __many __people __around __me.__"_ They're there in the shadows, watching and waiting for me. Or are they? Maybe I am hallucinating, again. All I know is, I need to get out of here before I go crazy or die. I'm unsure which would be preferable.

Turning a corner in this maze of tunnels and thinking, if only I could remember the way out, I would be free. I thought that I would remember. I've made that walk so many times, that you would think it was a second nature. All I wanted was freedom. Freedom to return to my life; back to my family and friends, and more importantly to my Bella - my reason for living and trying to escape from this hell that I'm in. I just hope that after all this time and what I have done; she will take me back. I dare not to think of her not wanting me. That would surely kill me. She has been my reason for surviving these last few months. Suddenly, I realize, that I have no idea how long I have been gone, it is impossible to mark time here.

In my haste, I stumble over my own feet. Obviously I'm not as strong and together as I think I am and fall over, flat on my face. It should hurt, but with the adrenalin coursing through me at the moment, I feel no pain. I try to stand but my ankle won't take my weight. Shit! I must've twisted it when I fell, but I can't give in. I have to get out of here; no matter what it takes.

I dread the noise I hear; slow, heavy footsteps coming towards me. Either someone had discovered that I was missing, or I was just plain unlucky. I didn't care which one of the two, I only cared about facing my discovery.

There was a sound of something dragging along the narrow corridor walls. I didn't wanna think about what it was. I needed get away but I was frozen; adrenalin replaced by fear.

"Edward, I know you're there. I can smell your fear," the voice was low and menacing, and closing in on me. I was sure that he can hear my heart beating; it felt like it was coming out of my chest. I needed to remain calm. This was the best chance of escape that I've been afforded. I couldn't imagine a chance like this coming again anytime soon. Pure cold fear ran through me. I've come up against him many times before. He was truly a sadistic bastard. I have never met anyone like him before. I knew that he enjoyed any chance to use his fists. I should know, I've been on the receiving end enough in my time here. He has never shown anything other than pure hatred for me since the first moment we met. I knew that my captors were truly capable of anything. That's what scared me the most, the fear I would never be free to leave here; that I would die at their hands. I didn't want to think about how I would die, if that is what they chose. I only hoped that they would show me some compassion and make it quick. Truly, I felt that they didn't care if I lived or died. I was an object to them; nothing of any real importance or value. I could be all too easily disposed of if they saw fit.

I hear a low, sadistic but familiar chuckle, from behind me. I turn towards the noise; I'm still on the ground where I fell. Damn! If I'd been more careful I might have made out of here. I see him grinning back at me. He was holding a baseball bat; hitting it into his free hand.

In a menacing way, he growls. "Oh Edward, you'll never ever learn will you? Now, you're really gonna to pay for this." Sneering he reached down towards me. I panicked as I knew there is no way out of this. I have failed; failed Bella, my family and more importantly myself, in my attempt to return to normality.

I tried not to show my fear or the disappointment flooding through me now that my attempt to escape had failed. These are clear signs of weakness. He leaned toward me and I felt yet again, the strength he had as he punched me squarely in the jaw. I taste, the now all too familiar, metallic taste as blood, fill my mouth. He then punched me again, this time landing higher. I'm sure my cheekbone cracked, as my head whipped away from the punch.

I heard his dark chuckle, then a sharp pain. My body relaxed and began to float away. This feeling was all too familiar to me. I tried to stay conscious but I lost my battle, yet again to the blackness.

**Authors****Notes:**  
>Well here we are and I am back with this, and I will admit to being nervous. I never intended it to be on hold for so long, so please accept my apologies - this has been hard for me to not post it.<p>

For those who are already with me – thank you for sticking around. I know that this has been on hold for what feels like forever, but I have had to change beta's on this. On that note I would like to thank the fabulous DreamOfRob10 for taking this mess on for me and making it better than it was before. She is doing an amazing job and I wish that I could hug her. Also Mamasutra who is the person who encouraged me to write this and then was the very first person to read it and tell me that I wasn't crazy and that it would work.

This fic will always have a very special place in my heart as it was my 'first', and I have certainly been busy since.

Thank you so much for reading and sticking with me on this one. Please do let me know what you think by hitting the review button below!

There are more chapters being beta'd at the moment, and as previously mentioned I will be posting Bella's point of view as a separate story – that is still to come.

Lou x x


	2. Nightmares

Chapter Two - Nightmares

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or any of these characters. No copyright infringement is intended**

I found myself sitting up in bed, gasping for breath; covered in sweat. My heart pounded nearly out of my chest.

A pair of long, slender arms reached around me, and I flinched away from them; fearing what they would do.

"Edward, it's okay." I hear the angelic voice of my beloved Bella whisper to me, "It was a nightmare. You're safe now and back with me, where you belong."

She was making soothing noises, pulling me backwards; reassuring me. The panic never goes away. Instead, it hides in that cave. Ready to appear again, at the drop of a hat.

I am lying down, being held in her arms again. I can't remember the last time that I had a good sleep without the nightmares invading my thoughts. I turn in her arms, my head against her chest as she strokes my back gently, trying to calm me.

The curtains are open and I can see the night sky from the moon through the apartment windows. I've insisted that these remain open at all times; I can't bear not seeing the sky; even at night. I missed this while I was gone.

The other thing that I missed while lying in bed, Bella - my reason for living through the recent hell I had endured. If anything had happened to her…I shudder at the thought. I wouldn't have been able to go on myself.

I turned my head into her neck and drank in her scent. My hands started to roam her body. I noticed that she was wearing one of my old football jerseys.

I ran my bruised hands underneath it, across her soft porcelain skin. I started kissing her collarbone, working my way to her mouth to kiss her lips. Then, it is like a switch flicked in my head. I began to kiss her roughly. She reciprocated, at first.

Then I started to kiss with more heat and passion, pushing myself into her small frame; pinning her to the bed. I was completely lost in the need that was building within me.

"Edward, stop!" Shrieked Bella.

I pulled back. I felt like I had been slapped; crouching at the base of the bed. Head in my hands; I meet her gaze. I felt the tears start to flow down my cheeks at what I saw before me.

Bella had her back to the headboard, clutching the bed sheet around her. She looked at me with a confused expression. I saw the smallest glint of fear in her eyes.

That made me feel more like a monster than I already did. _What__have__they_ _done__to__me?_ I couldn't bear the thought of harming one hair on her head._What __is_ _happening? _I flew off the bed and into the ensuite bathroom; slamming the door behind me. I stood at the sink, staring at the man looking back at me I didn't recognize him. Yeah, he looked like me, but the man was a stranger. I wanted to smash my fist into the mirror to make him disappear, but I knew from bitter experience that it wouldn't help.

I heard a soft knock on the door. "Edward, honey, can I come in?"

She tried to sound confident, but I heard the words catch in her throat.

I walked slowly to the door opening it; anxious to see what I will find waiting for me. She stood looking at me with love on her face. I didn't deserve any love from her. She should slap me, scream at me and tell me what a thoughtless, selfish bastard I was. But no, she managed to break down the walls that I had built to protect myself while I was gone.

I leaned against the door frame as she held her arms out to me. _How __could __she __possibly __want __to __offer __me __any __kind __of __affection __after __what __just __happened? __I __truly __am __the __monster __that __they __made __me __into._

"Come back to bed, Edward. Please?" She breathed.

"No!"

The thought of going back to bed, immediately made me feel sick.

Running past her through the hallway, I found my way, into the lounge. I went to the drinks cabinet; pouring myself a large whiskey.

I downed the amber liquid; burning its way down my throat. I poured a second, then a third. Deep down, I knew I shouldn't drink with the meds that the doctors have given me to help me sleep. This was a dangerous combination, but I needed to take the edge off. This seemed to be the best way.

I sat on the large sofa, throwing my head back, covering my eyes with my hands. I tried to make sense of what has just happened. Then I heard footsteps padding down the wooden flooring in the hallway. Bella stood there, watching and waiting for me to make the next move. I had no idea why she wasn't running away from me. I am a monster and not worth her time.

When I looked over to her, I managed a weak smile.

She joined me on the sofa, sitting next to me. No words were said. She grabbed a throw blanket from the other sofa, covering both of us.

I finished my drink, slowly this time, savoring every last drop. I wrapped my arms around her- my Bella. She seemed at ease, for now. Sleep then claims us. Thankfully, it was a dreamless darkness, for me.

**Authors Note**

Thanks again to the very fabulous DreamOfRob10 for betaing this for me and doing such a great job!

Thank you so much for reading and sticking with me on this one. Please do let me know what you think by hitting the review button below!

There are more chapters being beta'd at the moment, and as previously mentioned I will be posting Bella's point of view as a separate story – that is still to come.

Lou x x


	3. The Morning After

Chapter Three The Morning After

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or any of these characters. No copyright infringement is intended**

I eventually come back to consciousness, slowly opening my eyes. My throat was burning. Then I remembered. _What did I do last night to my beautiful, Bella? Will she forgive me?_ I noticed that I was in the guest room. I knew I didn't fall asleep there. I shook my head, hoping to clear it. It only made me feel dizzy.

Getting to my feet, the dizziness still affected me. I steadied myself, placing my hand on the wall. Slowly, I walk to the door wanting to find I hear voices. My heart started pounding. Instinctively, I put my back to the wall, edging my way slowly towards the door. I heard the voices coming from the lounge, they were talking in low hushed tones.

_Who are they? What the fuck do they want with me?_

I edged my way down the hallway, my back still flat against the wall. I needed to remain hidden, unseen and unheard. One of the many things I learned being held captive was not to draw undue attention to myself.

I stood listening at the edge of the doorway, relief flooded through me. They were only Bella and Emmett.

Watching them interact, I felt a pang of jealousy rip through me. The obvious closeness between the love of my life and my big brother, caused sudden anger to well up inside of me. I knew it was an irrational fear that she had moved on and found someone else. I shuddered at the thought of her replacing me in her heart and God forbid, in our bed.

I decided not to listen to this nagging doubt. I continued watching. Bella at the window staring out across the city, she didn't appear to be paying attention to Emmett. I knew my Bella well. Her mind was somewhere else.

I cleared my throat to announce my arrival. "Good morning." I didn't know if she would want me within ten feet of her following my behavior last night. If the roles were reversed in all honesty, would I?

Habitually, I ran my hand through my hair, or what was left of it. It had started to grow back from my _'complimentary makeover'._ I kind of liked the shorter look, but I knew that Bella liked my hair longer and messier. It was something she could run her hands through. All I wanted was happiness for Bella and if growing my hair out helped, then I would do it. She was my rock and stood by me, not believing the web of lies I had spun to keep her safe in my absence.

My mind started flashing through various things. One minute, it was all Bella then the next it was my knuckles. They were still sore and healing. I was only hoping that Emmett wouldn't notice and ask too many questions. They were the reminder of my own volatile temper. I couldn't let my anger get the better of me. Especially around Bella.

I had been to see the shrink. My dad insisted that I needed to try and work through what happened. I laughed at him. _How did he expect me to reconcile with being torn away from my life, family, and Bella?_ I was thrown into a world that I didn't know existed all because I made one simple but fucking stupid mistake. Needless to say we got nowhere. There was no point, I didn't want to be there. I wasn't willing to talk about what happened.

Being the dutiful son, I went to see the good Doc to keep family happy. Thinking of that day, makes me cringe.

Dr. Michael Newton was a psychiatrist. According to the reports he's a damn fine one. Then again, money can buy such care, and my family had plenty of that.

My session was an evening one. I couldn't stand to be in crowds of people jostling and milling round. It made me nervous and agitated. Carlisle came with me. Bella wanted to come but I insisted that for the first time, I wanted to do this with him. He wouldn't let me worm my way out of it and I knew that I could persuade Bella to let me skip it.

I sat there for an hour retreating into my own little world. The one I had frequently inhabited when I was alone and away from those I loved. I answered only when needed, volunteering no more information than needed. Once the hour was up, Carlisle's driver took us back to the apartment.

Bella was pacing, waiting for our return. I faked a smile, "I'm just gonna go lie down for a bit."

I knew Carlisle would talk to Bella. It always made me happy to think about how my family had taken to her from the start. She was always treated like a daughter, and she loved my family. She had told me they were a fantastic support network for her while I was gone.

I could hear their hushed voices. I knew I would be the topic of conversation. I laid down, but couldn't settle. I needed my safe retreat of the bathroom.

I splashed cold water over my face but it wasn't working. I needed more.

Filling the sink completely full, I found myself putting my face under the water. I opened my eyes inducing a mini panic attack. This brought back painful memories. I wanted to relive them, punishing myself so they wouldn't have to.

Pulling my face out of the water, gasping for air, I looked at myself in the mirror. I felt truly repulsed by what I saw. I punched, shouted and screamed at the gloating man in the mirror until he was shattered and splintered. I wanted him gone from my sight.

The pain was a welcoming feat that brought relief when the man disappeared. The man who gloated at my reaction. He taunted me every waking moment. The strong arms of Carlisle pulled me from the bathroom, restraining me to stop from doing further damage to myself. I looked at my hands, horrified to see them covered in blood.

"Oh my God," Bella gasped.

Another moment of panic. _Did I hurt her? _I searched Carlisle's distraught face, managing to utter a single word from my lips, "Bella?", before I broke down in tears, slumping to the floor.

How Carlisle managed to remain so calm was a true testament to the man he is, and something that I wished that I could be, finally spoke in a quiet voice, "Son, Bella is fine. She had to leave, you know how she is around blood." I silently chuckled, remembering that Bella passed out when we were blood typing in high school. We spent the afternoon in the nurse's office.

Carlisle managed to get me to my feet, pointing to me where Bella was in the hallway, crouched down, leaning against the wall. I managed a forced smile before the pain kicked in. _I'm definitely paying for this later_.

"Great, seven years bad luck, like I need anymore." I joked as Carlisle lead me down the hallway, to the kitchen. He wanted to clean up my hands. "Come on, I need to get you cleaned up."

I knew he didn't see anything remotely funny in my flippant comment as I chuckled again. "Really Edward. This is no time for jokes. What the hell is going on?"

Bella was by my side again. She was the one constant I could rely on in my life.

"Carlisle, its fine. The mirror can be replaced easily and I never liked it anyway."

Bella kept her distance until the blood was cleaned off. I could tell she was trying not to breathe it in.

Carlisle started to examine my hands, looking concerned he declared, "I'm asking Jasper to come by when he finishes at the hospital to look at these cuts."

I sighed, knowing that there was no point arguing with him. I wouldn't win this one.

"Either you let Jasper look at these, and treat you here, or I _will_ take you to the ER. Your choice son," he stated firmly.

I knew Jasper wouldn't judge me or say anything to Alice, to worry her. He was far from perfect himself. But he was one of the gentlest men that I knew and treated my sister like a Queen.

"I don't want to inconvenience anyone." I honestly didn't want anyone seeing me falling apart. It showed weakness and I knew I was weak.

"He just finished his shift. He'll be here in about twenty minutes," Carlisle said after flipping his phone closed.

Bella stepped forward with ice packs and a towel to wrap around the right hand, which was the worst of the two. "Here, this should help with the swelling."

Twenty minutes later, Dr. Jasper Whitlock arrived. He smiled at me, shaking his head when he saw what I had done. "Ed, man." He knew my temper and from looking at me I knew that he saw far more than I had wanted him to see.

It was like he could read my emotions.

Sitting me down, he examined my hands and removed shards of glass embedded in the knuckles . _ Damn!_. _That hurt! _The pain was my friend, reminding me that I am alive.

I couldn't help noticing the glances that were flying between the three of them. No one was saying anything about what had happened. I knew that they wanted to talk about it, but no one wanted to be the first to speak. I wasn't ready to talk or admit how I felt, so I stayed silent.

After Jasper finished removing the glass shards, and dressed the wounds, "Are you in any pain?" I shook my head... I wasn't.

He followed with a knowing look, "I'll just tell Alice that I got held up at work." bidding us goodbye, then left. He knew I would talk when I was ready.

Carlisle stayed for a few more minutes. I knew he was making sure that I was okay to be left with Bella. I knew my outburst worried him and was concerned with leaving me with her, alone.

A part of me wanted to talk to him, but another part doesn't want him to know how truly damaged I felt inside.

My angel appeared holding a glass of water and two Tylenol. "Here, take these. They'll help with the pain."

"Thanks, baby."

Throwing myself onto the couch and closing my eyes. All I could think was... _How did it get to this? My own reflection set me off this time. How long before I did some real damage to someone I cared about? _That thought made me shudder inside. If I hurt Bella, I would never forgive myself. I couldn't bear the thought of hurting her.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~**TAKEN**~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Brought back from that memory to the present, I moved across the room to Bella, I noticed Emmett get protective over her. Through the groggy haze that I was in, I managed to joke with him.

"Stand down soldier." Jeez he was taking the bodyguard thing way too seriously. As if I would hurt her.

I wondered if he was the reason I woke in the guest room.

I had a strong black coffee, which was helping clear the fog in my head, we all settled down to have breakfast together.

Emmett broke the silence as we were sitting, "This looks good, B. Thanks for breakfast."

"Your welcome. Dig in," she said, waving her hand across the table.

As we were eating, Emmett brought up the subject of going to the lake house for a long weekend. "Hey, what do you think about us heading up the the lake house?" I noticed Bella stiffen at the idea and that confused me. _Does she not want to spend time with me? Was I really that much of a repulsive monster in her eyes?_

"We could get Jasper and Alice to go." Bella queried, reaching for a bicuit and jam. This put me at ease. We wouldn't be alone. Emmett, Rose, Alice and Jasper would be there. She wouldn't have to worry about me _'flipping out'. _

I hoped being out of the city, into the open air, would clear my head. It would be nice not worry about being around people.

With a big smile on my face, I declared that it would be a great idea. "I think that's a great idea, Em."

All we needed was to plan a weekend to go. I only hoped I could deal with my crazy family for three very long days.

**Authors Note**

Thanks again to the very fabulous DreamOfRob10 for betaing this for me and doing such a great job!

Thank you so much for reading and sticking with me on this one. Please do let me know what you think by hitting the review button below!

There are more chapters being beta'd at the moment, and as previously mentioned I will be posting Bella's point of view as a separate story – that is still to come.

Lou x x


	4. The Lake House

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or any of these characters. No copyright infringement is intended**

* * *

><p>We made the decision to leave after a late breakfast the following Friday morning. I was glad to be getting out of the city. We were thankful the forecast implied good weather.<p>

Bella chose to drive up to The Dunes where the house, my parents owned, sat on the edge of Lake Michigan. The drive usually took about an hour. I closed my eyes and relaxed to the sound of Debussy, flowing through the speakers.

We used the house to get away for weekends and some of the holidays. It was secluded and there, I hoped I would be able to get some peace and much needed sleep.

Luckily, there was no one around when we left the apartment and made our way to the underground parking garage. I still felt like people were staring and pointing at me. I knew I was being completely irrational but that's how I felt, so I kept my head down and pulled my baseball cap over my eyes.

Bella seemed excited about getting out of the city. I'm sure she was sick of being cooped up in the apartment with me. I hoped being around family would give out some semblance and normality of the life we had before. I had requested very minimal visits from everyone. I knew they cared but I was still reluctant to be in crowded areas. I was afraid of the nervousness and being reminded of my darker days of my imprisonment.

I'd overheard Bella on the phone organizing the weekend plans. She asked for everyone to arrive later then we did; giving us some space to get comfortable with our surroundings.

She asked them to take it steady; not to pressure or expect too much from me.

Anger bubbled inside of me –Why was she trying to control everything and more importantly control me? Thinking rationally, I knew that her heart was in the right place. I appreciated the gesture, so I dismissed the anger as a pathetic over-reaction. I needed to get these mood swings and anger under control.

All of us being together for forty eight hours, will be the most people I had been around since I came home. The house was large enough. It consisted of six bedrooms and had a huge amount of space so that it shouldn't feel too crowded. I remembered once there being ten of us staying, plus a mere forty guests for a party for a birthday for Carlisle. It still felt empty.

Emmett was all for a family bonding weekend. Hell, normally I would be the first one to pack up the car, collect some beers and kick back but since…. well since I was taken, I was struggling to come to terms with normality. I knew that Emmett was keeping a close eye on me. He thought I hadn't noticed. He was probably reporting back to Carlisle and Esme on my progress. With Jasper being a doctor, he would be there to pick up the pieces if I fell apart. He wouldn't want to treat me in an official patient, doctor capacity, but it was reassuring to know that he was on hand, just in case.

Arriving at the house just before mid-day, the sun was shining which was a good sign. I enjoyed feeling the sun on my face. I had missed it so much during my time away. We pulled down the private driveway that hid the house from view. It felt good to be back.

Once we got out of the car, I stretched; breathing in the clear air and that relaxed me.

The house was a hideaway, with the exception of few people outside our family and close friends, knowing that we owned it. It was perfect, and more importantly hadn't been tainted by any bad memories for me; I wanted to keep it that way.

Walking through the door, I could see the lake. It had a view that I would never tire of. It was truly peaceful here. Wandering into the kitchen, I noticed both the fridge and pantry had been well stocked. I sighed with relief knowing we wouldn't have to leave for supplies. I made a mental note to thank Esme when I spoke to her, for this. I'm sure she called ahead to have the company, that maintained the house, to stock up for us.

I opened the large French doors, walking out onto the deck that lead down onto the soft sand. I felt like I could breathe for the first time in, well, months. I hoped the feeling would last.

Bella joined me shortly after; a smile lighting up her beautiful face. That was a sight that I had truly missed.

She slid her arms around my waist enquiring, "You okay, babe?"

I answered by pulling her into a kiss. This time, I was gentle and was rewarded by her instant response. I pulled away from her after a few minutes, knowing where this was leading. I wanted to show her that I truly loved her.

"C'mon angel, lets go get the best bedroom before the rabbles descend."

I gave her a genuine teasing smile. I took her hand in mine and lead her inside where we both knew what would happen. We made our way upstairs, picking the room on the top floor. The views over the lake were amazing, but not as amazing as Bella. Laying on the bed on her side, naked, tempting me to join her, beckoning me with her finger.

"C'mere, you." Damn, she didn't waste time getting undressed_._ I sure as hell wasn't going to deny her.

I stood for a moment, taking in every curve of her body, drinking her in. I wanted to take my time and kiss her all over. The woman before me deserved to be worshipped. I certainly intended to do just that. Discarding my clothes, I joined her on the bed, her body reacted to me perfectly and instantly, like we had never been apart.

I could feel her shudder under my touch as I ran my hands up her sides and across her breasts, latching my mouth onto one of her nipples causing her to moan. She ran her hands through my very short hair, tugging at what she could grip. Writhing underneath me, she begged me with her eyes to take her. How could I resist such an angel?

After much worshipping, I entered her slowly, taking my time, I started to make love to my own personal angel. Enjoying the feeling and the noises of pleasure she made in response to my thrusts, she bucked her hips in time with mine. As we made love, the past few months disappeared. All the nightmares and flashbacks were gone. I was feeling amazing. She was the only one making me feel this way. Her moans were for me. I was bringing her pleasure and she was rewarding me.

When she finally reached her orgasm, she took me crashing over the edge with her and I felt complete. There was only one word that I could use to describe her, breathtaking.

I had missed it all. The being close to her and being just us, together. We hadn't been together like this since I came home. Our sex had been passionless and forced. That was my fault entirely. This was something I was truly ashamed of.

I have loved Bella since the first moment that I saw her, and despite everything that had happened, she stood by me.

For the last couple of weeks, I had treated her at times, like she meant nothing to me; fucking her hard with no thought or concerns about anything else other than myself. Wanting to prove that I was back and alive with no intentions of letting her go. I had to live with my stupid mistake each and every day. I knew that once it was brought out into the open, it had the potential to rip my world even further apart.

Afterwards, we laid in each other's arms, safe and secure. We knew we had to get up; the others were due to arrive, soon. Untangling ourselves, we grabbed a quick shower together. There was nothing I wanted more than to make love to her again. I could tell from the look in her eyes that she wanted the same, but we resisted.

Once dressed, we made our way downstairs to wait for the others to arrive. I took that time to relax and prepare myself mentally. I knew that once they all arrived, they would bombard me with their questioning looks, care and concern. I love my family unconditionally, but it was hard to be around them at the moment.

Over the next few hours, I enjoyed my time with Bella. We made the most of the good weather and lounged around outside where Bella fell asleep curled up in my arms. While she slept, I watched her and was amazed at how peaceful she looked. She would sometimes mutter in her sleep. You often couldn't tell what she was saying, but it was adorable, nonetheless.

I knew, as I lay there that my siblings would be arriving soon, there was no way this peace and quiet would be allowed to remain unbroken. My angel needed her rest, so I managed to extract myself from her embrace and made my way inside, silently.

Hearing a car pull up, I took a deep breath, not knowing who was about to walk through the door, setting my nerves on edge. When I heard a loud voice, I knew Emmett and Rosalie had arrived. I was glad they were first. Emmett had already seen quite a bit recently, at our apartment, so he knew how I was and what to expect from me.

The door flew open and he breezed in with his arm around Rose; the door slamming shut behind them. I flinched at the loud noise; catching me off guard. My reaction caused Emmett to look sheepish and grin at me.

Rose decided to scold him for his behaviour, "Em, you oaf, what are you doing? Way to announce our arrival." Sounding annoyed with him.

He embraced me in one of his '_man hugs' _like he hadn't seen me in years.

Bella appeared in the doorway, looking dishevelled and annoyed. I had wanted to wake her gently but no, thanks to Emmett, that wasn't happening.

Rose saw her as she stood in the doorway and rushed to greet her, "Oh, Bella, it's so good to see you."

It was glad to see them so close. I had always had the impression that Rose didn't like Bella, but things had obviously changed since I was away. That pleased me. Rose made her way over to me; arms out for a hug. How could I say _no _to her?

"Gosh Edward, you're looking good, I haven't seen you since..." I felt like I had been slapped when she drew back and spoke to me.

I froze. I knew she didn't mean anything but the last time I saw her, was just before I was taken and the memory is still raw.

No-one knew what to do next, so Bella tried to break the silence that was hanging around us, "You guys want iced tea?"

Rose couldn't look at either of us and said , "I just need to freshen up first and change. I came straight from a studio shoot, which was long and boring."

Emmett was the only person I knew who could break the tension that had built, and I loved him for it.

"Hmmm need a hand freshening up, babe?" Emmett asked in a low voice while suggestively wiggling his eyebrows at her. She swatted him on the arm, before promptly running off upstairs giggling like a schoolgirl.

I rolled my eyes at their behavior; shouting after them, "Can you two not leave each other alone for five minutes?"

Bella caught my eye and I could tell she was reading me like a book. She knew I had remembered when I last saw Rose. I tried to keep the look of hurt from my face but the memory was still too painful. My reverie was broken when Emmett came back downstairs with a face that looked like he was about to cry. I managed not to laugh at him.

Bella read his face perfectly and teased him. "Awww, she knock you back stud?"

Emmett ignored her and grabbed a beer from the fridge. He sat on the large couch and started flicking through the TV channels. I went to join him knowing that, in true Cullen men style, he would only talk when he was ready and certainly not before.

We sat in silence mindlessly flicking through the channels on the tv. I spied Bella as she went upstairs. I assumed that Rose needed someone to talk to.

When they reappeared, I could tell that Rose had been crying. I only hoped this wasn't something that I had done. I didn't get chance to tell her that it was okay before they grabbed a jug of iced tea and went to sit outside.

We were still in our lounging positions when Alice and Jasper arrived. Alice breezed through the door with a huge smile on her face and danced through the room. She made her rounds of hugs and embraces then made her way out to Bella and Rose. Jasper hadn't even made it through the door yet. I heard Bella laugh. It was music to my ears.

Jasper greeted us, with fist bumps, "Long time, no see, bro," before he went out to the ladies. He was a perfect fit for my sister where Alice was non-stop; he was the calming influence.

Alice's arrival brought me back out of my shell. It was hard to maintain a bad mood around her and her sunny outlook was infectious. Jasper decided to join us in our channel hopping marathon. I could hear the ladies outside chatting away and this gave me comfort to know that Bella was happy.

After we spoiled our ladies with pizza from Bella's favorite pizzeria, I lead Bella down to the shoreline. We sat wrapped in each other's arms, watching the sun set. Her back was pressed to my chest while I kissed her neck with slow, soft, gentle kisses. I let my hands roam under her top and over her skin. I was rewarded when she turned and straddled my lap, gazing deep into my eyes.

I looked at her with pure love and adoration. We continued to kiss but I hesitated. I wasn't sure of myself for a split second; she noticed and reacted to me. "You okay, baby?" I nodded for reassurance.

We ended up back in our previous position. I revelled in the happiness just to have this contact with her and to hold her in my arms. I just wanted to be with her. I never wanted to let her go. I didn't know what the future would bring for us, but I just hoped that we would be able to face the future together, and together we would be able to face anything.

I let out a long sigh and watched to sun go down with my Angel by my side, not knowing what tomorrow would bring.

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><p><strong>Authors Note<strong>

Thanks again to the very fabulous DreamOfRob10 for betaing this for me and doing such a great job!

Thank you so much for reading and sticking with me on this one. Please do let me know what you think by hitting the review button below!

There are more chapters being beta'd at the moment, and as previously mentioned I will be posting Bella's point of view as a separate story – that is still to come. Please bear with me as my poor betas laptop has died on her and she has had to start again :-(

Lou x x


	5. Confrontations

**Chapter Five – Confrontations**

_**Disclaimer: I do not own either Twilight or these characters, and no copyright infringement is intended. I do own this storyline though and I love it!**_

The weather was good when we woke that morning. Emmett decided that it would be a good idea to take Dad's boat out and enjoy some '_man time'_, leaving the ladies behind to do '_girlie shit._ I laughed. I really didn't want to be too far away from Bella. The thought of not having her near made my heart start to pound heavily in my chest.

Emmett took the wheel and soon enough, we were far enough from land that I could see the house in the distance, it was merely a speck on the shoreline.

We lazed around chatting about nothing much when I noticed that Emmett and Jasper were having a silent conversation. I turned to confront them.

"C'mon you two, whatever it is, spit it out. I know you too well, Emmett."

He looked at me knowing that I had called him out on the real reason he wanted to get me out here, alone. He took a deep breath before he spoke.

"Remember that we love you and we're only trying to help."

Fucking great! Emmett had chosen our _'man time' , _for a misplaced intervention. I couldn't walk away from this one. Thanks to Emmett, we were trapped together out on the lake, so my choices were stay or swim. I chose to stay and hear what he had to say.

"Edward, enough of the fucking bullshit and smokescreens, you need to tell me what happened to you. I need to know the truth and not whatever diluted version you feel like giving. Carlisle might fall for it, but bro, I aint gonna be fooled!" He huffed in frustration. "You clearly need help that you're not willing to accept. There is only so much that, locking yourself away in your ivory tower, can heal. Look at what you're doing to Bella." He gestured with his hands towards the house. "The woman that you profess to love so much. You're going to end up, either hurting her or driving her out of your life. I won't stand by idly and watch that happen. If you want to wallow in self-pity go ahead, but don't expect the rest of us to move there with you."

I felt the darker anger rising in me. I hadn't felt that for weeks and it scared me. I knew that this would lead to danger if I didn't get it back under control, and quickly. I'd had enough of his self-righteous rant and the only way I knew to shut him up is with my fists.

I moved to take a swing at him, and unsurprisingly I missed. Stupid really, as he is so much bigger than me, but he wasn't letting me get away with it.

Emmett had me pinned down on the seat saying, "Edward, you DO NOT wanna start that shit with me."

Jasper stepped in to play peace-keeper. "Emmett, I think that you've gone too far. Leave him alone. You have no idea what he has been through. He'll talk when he's ready."

"Back off Doc! If I wanted a professional opinion I would ask for one." snarled Emmett.

"Emmett, shut the fuck up! I really don't wanna sit here discussing this with you right now. I'll tell you what I want you know when I'm read. It's none of your goddamn business anyway. This shit happened to me, not you. I need you to back off with the suffocating brother routine, please. You think I don't know why you pop in for coffee on your morning runs? You honestly think I am gonna flip out and hurt Bella?"

He opened his mouth to defend himself; he didn't get a chance. "I would kill myself before I would hurt her. She's my life and the only reason I had to get outta that fucking hell hole. The subject is closed, so unless you want me to forget that I have a brother and cut you outta my life, leave it alone. Trust me. I'm serious."

Emmett released his grip on me and stepped back to the controls and with no warning the boat lurched forward.

We made it back to land in deafening silence. I had clearly made my point.

Once the boat was docked, I got off as quickly as possible, wanting to leave the events behind me. I heard Emmett shout out to me, but I ignored him. I was through with this bullshit. I needed to be alone with my thoughts.

I stormed back into the house brushing Bella aside like she was nothing to me. Ignoring the concern I could see written all over her face. My mood was black as midnight and I didn't want to lash out at her or anyone.

When I reached our room, I retreated to the bathroom. That's where I felt safe. Once inside, after I locked the door, I slid down the wall; sitting, hunched on the floor with my head in my hands. Everything kept replaying in my mind. I was desperately trying to calm myself down before I snapped and lashed out at everyone I loved. It wasn't their fault. They were only trying to help me. I knew this but I couldn't accept their help. I had learned not to show emotion while I was gone. It was a sign of weakness, which could and would be used against you. I would not be weak again.

I didn't know how long I had been in the bathroom until I heard Alice scream. That snapped me back into the here and now; away from my dark place.

Instinctively the first thought in my head was, _"Shit! Who found us here?" _

I was downstairs in a flash. My heart sank at the sight before me. Bella was in Jaspers arms. She was sobbing and clinging to him. Something had clearly happened where she needed to be carried back to the house, but what? She looked unharmed so it wasn't them finding us. I felt sick wondering what had happened to her. This must be my fault, it has to be. I couldn't admit that to anyone else. She was with Jasper, so my brain decided it must be his fault.

I was suddenly filled with a rage that I tried so hard to suppress, before I managed to growl, "Jasper, if I find out that you've hurt her, I will end you!"

In that moment I meant it too. It would be so easy to do. I had learned from the best. He told me some bullshit story about her being tired and collapsing on the beach. I didn't believe a word of it. I was having a hard time trying to figure out what the fuck happened out there.

He took her to our bedroom. I was so glad in that moment, that my sister had chosen to fall in love with a Doctor. I however, was not leaving her alone with anyone, not even with a qualified MD.

I stood watch from the doorway, taking in every little movement. She refused any sleeping meds despite the fact that she was clearly exhausted. I felt like a monster because she was caring more for me then for herself.

Once Jasper left us alone, I joined her on the bed; wrapping my arms around her while she rested. She looked so peaceful and beautiful, but I noticed that she wouldn't look at me. I wondered if I repulsed her now.

My brain worked overtime, thinking about the events of the afternoon like an action replay in my head. Anger started rolling through me again. I decided, that if I continued to lay here wide awake, my brain was going to re-run the incident. That would lead to more painful memories being dredged back up. I didn't want that. I just needed to enjoy the time away with my family and my Bella. The whole weekend was now on the brink of being ruined completely. I needed to take action and try to fix this mess; to try and salvage it.

Bella had done so much for me. I needed to put this weekend back on track, but I didn't know how to be successful doing it.

When I noticed that Bella was finally asleep, I made sure she was completely unconscious before I moved away from her. She sighed when I broke contact but didn't wake.

I went downstairs, immediately I made my way over to where everyone was sitting outside. I had a feeling that they were talking about me because silence descended when they saw me approach. I brushed this thought aside, and with a painted on smile said.

"So bro, are we having a BBQ or what?"

Emmett and Jasper grinned at me when I heard an unexpected voice say. "Son, I can't think of anything better."

I spun around and saw Esme and Carlisle standing behind me; she had tears in her eyes. I hadn't seen her since I discharged myself from the clinic. Esme was one of the gentlest souls you could ever wish to meet. She and Carlisle were devoted to each other and to us; their family.

"Hope you don't mind us dropping by. I really wanted to see you and heard that you would all be having fun." Expressed Esme; walking over to me wrapping me in a warm embrace.

I thanked God they hadn't arrived a couple of hours earlier.

"Esme, I love you and I'm sorry I've not been very sociable lately." I didn't know what else to say to her.

She just smiled at me and said. "I know son. I know."

We had been setting up and chatting for over an hour, when a pair of familiar hands reached around my waist; a head leaning on my back. I turned around and she was gazing at me; looking refreshed and thankfully none the worse for her earlier collapse.

"You okay, baby? We're gonna cook up a storm here, so I hope you are hungry."

She smiled back at me and simply said "Starving". I kissed the top of her head breathing in her scent.

"Angel, we have visitors." I motioned towards where my parents were sitting; looking out over the lake.

They were lost in conversation with each other. It was nice to see, that after years of marriage, they were still so in love with each other. I secretly hoped that would be Bella and I. Although, the guilt of my secrets flashed through me. I quickly chased that away.

Bella skipped over to them and was soon engaged in lots of hugs and kisses. She eventually ended up sitting and chatting away with them. The love that I feel for her was immense; it made my heart start to beat faster. I knew in that instant, that a decision had to be made. Bella deserved to know the truth, so did my family.

There and then I knew I would tell them everything. There would be no more secrets and I would tell them tonight.

A couple of hours later after we had all eaten, we were sitting; huddled around the fire pit on the beach. When I got back from fetching more drinks, I cleared my throat, it's now or never before I lost my nerve.

"Ladies, I am not sure if you want to stay to hear this. If you don't then I understand, but I need to do this. I feel that it's time for me to tell you exactly what happened to me, while I was gone."

Carlisle gave me an encouraging smile before he got up; patting me on the back to show his support. They all said that they wanted to stay. Rose and Alice said that if it got too much they would go inside. Esme and Bella made it clear that they were staying no matter what. Emmett gave me an encouraging grin.

"This is something that you all need to know. This may be extremely painful for Bella, but part of this story she already knows. This all started well before I was taken. I know now this was directly linked to my abduction."

A look of panic crossed Bella's face and I saw the pain and worry in her eyes. I had told her about this already, but I had heavily edited the truth. Still, it was going to drag up some rather painful memories for us, and probably add a whole load more for her.

I walk over to her, whispering in her ear, "I'm so sorry, baby. Are you okay with me revealing this?"

As I drew back, I placed a kiss on her forehead to reassure her. She nodded at me. Now that I had her support, I would reveal what we had sworn to put behind us. I knew that this would involve being 100% honest with her. For the first time, I was about to reveal the events that happened the night before she left me. Although, it still caused a chain reaction that I had been powerless to stop.

I was terrified, I had lied to the woman that I professed to love, but I had done it feeling that it was the right thing to do. I loved her, but I couldn't face the thought of losing her. Especially when it was all over a mis-understanding that was my fault, caused because I couldn't control my insane jealousy and temper. I had to tell her, knowing that I risked tearing us apart. Maybe with the love and support of my family, she would find it in her heart to forgive me, even though I could not forgive myself.

The atmosphere had changed. They had obviously realized that there was far more to this than they first thought.

Carlisle had a serious demeanour; he looked around before speaking;

"Son, you really don't need to do this now. I think that you should wait and speak to Dr. Newton at your next session. This really isn't the time or the place to be talking about it. You need to speak to a professional…"

I stopped him mid-sentence. "Carlisle, please. I think that now is the perfect time and place. I've already had shit from Emmett this afternoon about not opening up, so this way, it will all be out in the open and you can all see exactly why I appear to be so fucked up."

Everyone with the exception of Jasper, turned to stare at Emmett.

Esme was the first to speak. "Emmett, I thought better of you. I am so disappointed."

Rose slapped him on the arm; folding her arms across her chest looking furious. Carlisle simply shook his head. Emmett responded, "Hey, I was trying to help him. He obviously needs to talk and who better than his big brother to open up to."

Bella opened her mouth to speak but I cut her off. "Emmett, it's fine, I forgive you. I know that you were only trying to help. You maybe went about it the wrong way, but I know that your heart was in the right place, otherwise I wouldn't be ready to do this now with everyone I love around me, to support me."

Taking a last look at my family before I dropped my bombshell, I took a large swig of the beer that I was nursing. "Right, here goes."

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><p><strong>Authors Notes:<strong>

Thanks again to DreamOfRob10 for betaing this for me and sticking by me, she really is working very hard on this. She also has her own stories too - doing such a great job! http: .net /u / 2580964 / DreamofRob10 Do stop by and show her some love. I have no update schedule for this fic, so I will update when I get chapters back, but please do let me know what you are thinking.

If you like what you are reading here, then please do check out my other stories, Karma Killer is a high school fic where a secret is about to blow the world of E&B wide apart. Links on my profile.

Also I am a contributing author for a great fandom cause, Fandom For Heroes fandom4heroes . blogspot . com, for £5 you can get your hands on a fantastic compilation, this is to raise money for our servicemen and women that that have been injured while serving their country.


	6. Confessions

Confessions

**Disclaimer: I do not own these characters or Twilight, no copyright infringement is intended. I do own this storyline though.**

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><p>With the decision made, there was no turning back now. I had smoothed things out from this afternoon and I had Bella's full approval to reveal what I now knew was the catalyst for the whole chain of events. Taking a deep breath I started to speak, "You guys don't know about what I am about to tell you, so I need to ask, please don't interrupt. I want to be able to tell you the truth and if you interrupt me I may bottle it and you'll never find out." I sighed deeply before I continued. "Several months ago I misinterpreted a situation, completely, and for that I was and still am truly sorry." I started to tell them what happened and I relived it as if it was only yesterday.<p>

_**~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ T A K E N ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~**_

**Several months earlier**

I loved Bella with every fibre of my being, but at times I was prone to bouts of the green eyed monster and I knew that she had put up with them through our years together.

I called her at work and was told she was out meeting with a new author, so I rang her mobile which went straight to her voice-mail after ringing a few times. I was sure she rejected the call because of it.

I didn't leave a voice-mail. I was completely confused as to why she would had refused my call. She had never, ever dropped a single call from me. If she was in a meeting she would answer. We had a code word we used so that I would know she was busy but would call me back.

When she came home that night I asked her about her day as normal, she said that she was busy in meetings with Tanya, her boss all day and didn't get chance to breathe. She said that she even had a lunch meeting, too, so she didn't get a break to call me back but she had noticed that I had called. She apologized and told me she was exhausted. She then headed for a long soak in the bath, turning down my offer to join her. I was weary with what I had been told, maybe the receptionist got it wrong.

The next day I called her at work again, just to check and see if she wanted to go out for dinner. I had already called her mobile and it went straight to voice-mail, again. The receptionist told me that she was out of the office at a meeting.

I decided to turn on the Cullen charm, flirting with Leah, telling her that I wanted to surprise Bella and asked if she knew where I could find her. Unfortunately she didn't and that the venue of the meeting was not in Bella's schedule.

That struck me as strange, normally she was so organized, always letting the office know where she was. I decided to take a walk out of my office to get some air to try and clear my head. I had an hour before my next meeting, so that gave me enough time to calm myself down to stop my thoughts from running wild.

I wandered aimlessly, ringing Bella's mobile several times but each time the call went straight through to her voice-mail. Eventually I left a rather pissy voice-mail asking her to call me back, if she could spare me two minutes in her busy day. I felt like a dick as soon as I hung up. I would apologize to her tonight when I saw her.

Then I saw a sight which caused my heart to stop beating for a moment. It was Bella. She was sat in the window booth of a local diner and there was a man with her. It definitely didn't look like a business meeting, to me. They were leaning across the table, deep in conversation holding hands. I was instantly, livid.

Frozen to the spot, I couldn't move. It was like watching a scene from a movie in ultra-slow motion. She moved her hand out of his and reached up to cup his cheek. He responded by taking her hand and kissing it.

It took all my self-control to not walk into the diner and punch him. How dare he touch my Bella like that. Problem is the look on her face, this was no new author, she knew this guy. They were sharing some form of affection; a bond if you will, but yet I didn't know who he was. The only conclusion that could reach was that she was having an affair. I knew that she was too good for me. I had always expected something like this to happen, but it still crushed me.

The guy was good looking, tall, tanned, well-built and obviously charming to Bella. She didn't normally act like this around other men. I continued to watch as they got up and left the booth. They walked out and he had his hand on the small of her back, guiding her as I did, then they embraced. He kissed her cheek and I heard him say.

"I'll call you soon to make the plans definite. I really can't wait for us to be together all the time."

She responded with a smile that lit up her entire face before saying.

"Email or call me at work or my mobile, that way I don't have to answer any awkward questions from you know who."

They then walked off in separate directions. I watched as he glanced back over his shoulder with a big shit eating grin on his face. I wanted to wipe that smug look off of his face. I probably would have gotten my ass beaten, considering how large the guy was, but it would have been worth it after what I just witnessed.

Anger coursed through me. Tons of scenarios plagued my mind trying to figure out what plans they were talking about. I needed to know what she was keeping from me and why. The green eyed monster reared his ugly head and jealousy bubbled inside of me. I headed back to the office and made it in time for my three o'clock meeting. I couldn't even concentrate the entire time.

When my day was over I was fuming. The scene from the diner kept playing itself over and over in my mind. I needed to de-stress before I went home, so I made my way to the closest bar as soon as I left work.

I poured drink after drink down my throat. I wasn't helping anything other than causing me to get drunk quicker. I hadn't eaten since by brunch meeting that morning. When I made it home, Bella was sitting on the couch with her laptop, typing away.

"Hey baby, everything okay? You sounded a little stressed on the your messages."

"Oh, I'm just peachy, babe. Peachy. Did you have a fun day in your '_meetings_'?" I spat in response; making the whole inverted quotation marks in the air when I said meetings with as much venom as I could muster.

"Edward, what's the attitude for? What's wrong?"

"Did you enjoy your little meeting at the diner? When were you planning on telling me? I saw you holding hands, and kissing; making your secret little plans." I said, snidely.

A look of horror and then recognition crossed her face. She knew she had been caught.

"Edward, it's not what you think. Let me explain? Please."

"What's there to explain? You lie to me about where you are, your office doesn't know where you are, you drop _my_ calls and then I see you kissing another man in the street! How fucking thick do you think I am Bella?" I was beyond pissed off.

I slammed my fists down on the kitchen table, causing a vase of flowers to topple over, spilling water over the table and onto the floor. The vase rolled off; shattering into a million pieces but neither of us moved.

"I refuse to speak to you when you're like this, Edward. You're being so fucking childishly pathetic and not to mention jealous. When you eventually sober up, remove your head from up your ass and decide that you want to have a grown up conversation about this, please, let me know."

She was close to tears but I didn't care. I had called her out on her lies and now she needed time to deny it; to make up some story to cover her tracks. My first girlfriend Jessica cheated on me after lying to my face before she left me for my then best friend. History was repeating itself. Only this time, I wouldn't be left looking like a loser.

I turned on my heel, ignoring the fact that Bella was crying, stormed out of the apartment, slamming the door behind me. Grabbing the first taxi I could get I was at Twilight before I knew it; a new club that had opened where we had VIP membership through Emmett's connections. Inside, I made my way straight to the bar. I sat wallowing, drinking beer and downing shots. The events I witnessed, kept playing over in my mind. Bella's face morphed into Jessica then back again. I refused be hurt like that again. I swore it at the time and I meant it. Bella managed to somehow heal my broken heart. She taught me to love and trust again. Now she has taken all that love and trust and stomped all over it.

My cell rang, it was Bella. I rejected the call and switched it off. I wanted her to see how it felt being ignored. I felt pleased with myself, somewhat, but my childish tit for tat response, was uncontrolled.

I motioned to the bartender to get me another drink when I heard a woman's voice next to me.

"Let me buy you a drink. There's nothing worse than seeing a handsome man drinking alone."

I turned to see who the voice belonged to and to my surprise, she was stunning. My crotch agreed with my initial assessment. It started to stir in response to her low throaty voice. It sent shivers down my spine and other regions of my body.

She introduced herself as Heidi, saying that she was the co-owner of the club. She was definitely hot and obviously loaded and flirting with me. Part of me knew that I should say thank you and walk away because I have a girlfriend, but another more aggressive part of me didn't care because I knew Bella was going to leave me. I wasn't about to turn my back on her flirtatious behaviour towards me.

Heidi moved us to a VIP lounge, where drinks just magically appeared. She leaned into me; her hand ran up and down the inside of my thigh. God, it felt amazing. She smelled good and her hand action was making me want more. Before I knew it, I leaned into for a kiss. She pushed me back into my seat; purring in my ear,

"Not here. If this is what you truly want, leave discreetly then meet me by the Starbucks on the corner. I'll be in a limo. Be there in ten minutes".

She got up, sashaying out of the room with a quick glance over her shoulder at me; a smile played across her lips. She looked so fucking hot, tall and slim with long, reddish brown hair, slender hips and long legs which I could imagine wrapped around my waist while I did unspeakable things to her body.

Fifteen minutes later, I stood on the street corner just about to walk away, when a black limo pulled up. The window went down to reveal Heidi, on the other side. "So, are you coming or what?"

She wiggled her eyebrows at me when she spoke in a seductive manner. I wanted to say, '_not yet',_ but I was sure that I would be soon.

With any thoughts of doubt leaving me, I got in the back and we started kissing frantically. We drove for about ten minutes, making out like a pair of horny teenagers, when suddenly the door opened. Heidi simply stepped out, thanked the driver and beckoned me to follow her into the apartment building. We made it to the lift and once we were in there, I slammed her against the wall; running my hands all over her body. I wasn't sure if we would make it to her apartment because I wanted her right here, right now.

"Whoa stud, slow down, we have all night." She chuckled in response.

When the lift door opened I gasped, we were at the penthouse. She said that she was co-owner of the club so I suppose it made sense that she would have an apartment to match. It took up the entire top floor and gave a 360 degree view across the Chicago skyline. It was stunning, but not as stunning as the creature I had next to me.

She led me to the bedroom and walked over to the window, turning her back on me before she slowly and seductively wriggled her way out of her dress. She was wearing a beautiful deep red matching bra and panties, that begged to be to touched. I could tell from where I stood, that it was expensive, forming part of her overall look. Although it would look much better on then off, but that was not going to solve any of my problems tonight.

As the dress made it's way down her body, I drank in her perfect pale skin, slender waist. She definitely knew how to tease a man. She left her heels on and started to make her way slowly, toward me. My erection started to throb even harder in my pants and I knew that I had to have her right now. In that moment nothing else mattered. Certainly not Bella and certainly not her new lover.

I growled in pure lust, walking over to meet her, grabbing her roughly. The feeling of the lingerie in my hands was unfathomable. It was as soft as it looked. Ruled by the pure lust coursing through me, I pushed her against the nearest wall, as I hungrily kissed her. Somehow she managed to turn the tables and switched places with me; my back against the wall.

She seductively slid her way down my body, running her hands appreciatively over me; letting her nails drag lightly down my chest. She knelt before me; slowly unbuckling my belt before undoing my pants; freeing my erection. She gazed back up me through her eyelashes. She was so goddamn hot, that I didn't know how much longer I could stand to be teased.

Heidi started licking her lips temptingly, before she started to kiss the tip of my erection. Expertly, she kissed her way up and then back down my length. She was definitely teasing me; driving me insane. I didn't know how much more I could've possibly taken before she finally took me into her hot, waiting mouth.

It felt amazing the way she proved to be an expert in her craft. She moved up and down my cock, always judging me to make sure that I wasn't about to explode. She kept prolonging my enjoyment but at this moment, it was pure torture. She kept pausing when I made too much noise. She was a truly amazing creature. This was, by far, one of the best blow jobs that I had ever received.

Eventually, I had enough of this brand of fantastic foreplay. I needed to be inside her, fucking her hard, making her scream my name. I was unsure of how long I could hold on before I came because she had me so wound up.

With a sense of growing urgency, I pulled her up from between my legs, I pushed her back against the wall. I pulled her hips towards me and her legs instinctively wrapped themselves around my waist. Her heels dug into my ass.

Growling; I thrust my way into her. We kissed each other all over; unable to get enough of each other. I knew it was me that I tasted on her lips and that turned me on to the highest extent. The sex was fast and hard, but she kept asking for it harder and harder. I couldn't deny her and refuse such a beautiful creature. It was as if she cast a spell over me and I couldn't resist.

Everything felt so fucking good. She was screaming loudly as she reached her climax and slumped into in my arms, completely spent. I was tremendously pleased and satisfied. This caused a domino effect; my orgasm hitting me with brutal force. It seemed to last forever.

She slumped further down where I still had her pinned to the wall. Neither of us were able to stand from the strength sapping orgasm we both just experienced. We stayed there until we were able to move, the only word I managed to utter was, "Wow!"

With her legs still wrapped around me; exhausted but happy, I walked us over to her large four poster bed. I was imagining her bound to one of the posts with me making her come over and over again. I needed to recoup some of my spent energy first. I was damn sure that she wasn't ready to go again.

I smiled rather smugly, to myself. I had just met this woman in a club, she's incredibly hot, and I left her speechless. I was satisfied that it was all because of me. Being single, might not be quite as bad as I had first thought.

I laid next to her, in her large bed, watching her blissed out expression. I felt pure unadulterated lust start to rise within me again. Instincts took over and I grabbed her roughly and we fucked again, although not as animalistic this time but still, it helped to blot out Bella from my mind.

I woke the next morning disorientated with a hangover from hell. My head was pounding and I was vaguely aware that this was not my apartment. I quickly replayed last night in my mind, I groaned loudly into the pillow. A sultry voice met my ears saying.

"So, you're awake? I thought that maybe I wore you out."

I hurriedly sat upright to see the beautiful beguiling creature from last night. She was standing at the foot of the bed with my clothes in her hand. She still looked stunning in a floor length peacock green, silk robe. I could feel myself starting to get hard at the sight of her, with a smile starting to form on my lips, she read my expression and returned the smile.

"As much as I enjoyed myself last night, you need to get dressed and get out, quickly. My lover is on his way over, he will kill us both if he found you here".

My mind froze. Lover? Where were her thoughts and concerns about him last night while we were having mind blowing sex, not once but twice? I had to get the hell outta here. I also had Bella to think about. _Oh, God, what had I_ _done?_

I made it out of the apartment building back onto the street. I was so panicked that I wasn't paying attention to where I was going, accidentally bumping into a man on the way out. I apologized profusely but his entourage just told me to leave. He gave me a look that went straight through me. He had the most piercing eyes I had ever seen. Clearly he was a force to be reckoned with.

I put my head down and walked away; blending into the crowd. In the cold light of a Chicago morning, with a raging hangover in yesterday's work clothes, I made the long, slow walk of shame back to our apartment. I switched my cell on and there were fifteen voice-mails and texts from _her._ She started off crying, then she got mad then back to crying. God, I was such an ass. What was I going to say to Bella? _I'm sorry I slept with a woman I met last night in a club, so before you leave me I'm leaving you first? _I somehow made my way home, not knowing what would become of the situation, never mind the best thing to do about it.

I got to the apartment around seven. I attempted to let myself in without being heard, but I should've known better.

"Look what the cat dragged in. Good night was it?" She spat at me. I couldn't blame her for her harshness.

God, she looked like she hadn't slept. Her eyes were red and puffy from crying. I froze not knowing what to do. I walked over to her to instinctively put my arms around her, but she flinched away from my approach.

"How fucking dare you come back here smelling like sex and the two dollar perfume of some cheap tart. And looking like you had the best night of your life! I just hope she was worth throwing it all away for Edward, I really do."

She stormed past me into the bedroom, slamming the door behind her. Why was I being treated like the bad guy? She was the one I had seen with another man. She was the one planning to leave me, wasn't she? I sat on the couch; head in my hands not knowing what to do next.

She reappeared, standing over me; hands on her hips. Anger flared in her eyes replacing any sign of tears that might have been there previously.

"So who was she, Edward? Who is the fucking slut that you're willing to throw us away over? I hope she was worth it, because you will never _ever_ touch me again."

"Oh you're a fine one to talk Bella." I spat, right back at her. "I saw you with him at the diner. I saw you holding his hand. I saw you kiss him and I'm the bad guy here? First Jess, now you?" Sarcasm dripped from my voice like venom.

"Edward you really do need to realize I'm nothing like that high school slut you dated. If you're referring to yesterday afternoon, which I assume you are, for your information, I was meeting with Sam Uley. He's Leah's boyfriend. You do know Leah, my PA, right? Who he is completely devoted to. They are childhood sweethearts and he wanted to plan the perfect romantic proposal. Jake is his best friend, so he asked me to meet Sam as a favour. I know you remember Jake because you gave me enough shit about being his friend when we got together because you were so fucking jealous. Sam needed a woman's touch and some advice, and not in the way that you think."

Her voice was suddenly very calm. I knew Leah, and I remembered that she had spoken about her boyfriend Sam before, but I had never met him. Of course I remember Jake. I was insanely jealous of their friendship. I knew that they knew each other from Bella's home town, Forks. _Oh, God. What had I done?_

"Bella, I am so, so sorry. I saw you with him and you were avoiding my calls. Even Leah didn't know where you were. What was I supposed to think?"

"You could try trusting me! I love you with all my heart and soul yet you thought that I was capable of having an affair? You didn't even ask me what I was doing or give me a chance to explain. That really fucking hurts and breaks my heart."

"Bella please, let me explain. I was jealous and jumped to the wrong conclusion. I should have given you a chance to explain." I waved my hands, frustratedly. "You know what I am like. When I saw him with you, I saw red and it's no excuse, I know."

"So, you went out, got drunk and screwed the first woman who flashed a smile at you?" She asked, more making a statement; not a question. "Then you have the audacity to come crawling back here with your tail between your legs hoping that I would forgive you." She smacked her hands against the kitchen counter. "Then, when you get caught, you try and blame me. Please, tell me if I'm wrong?"

She was furious. How was I going to explain this? I knew that if I told her the truth, she would leave and never come back and I would lose her forever. Despite what I did last night, she could never, ever find out the truth.

A little voice in the back of my head screamed _"Lie Cullen, lie"..._and I did.

Taking her hands in mine, I took a deep breath. I had to make sure that she believed me; that I loved her and that nothing happened. I'm not a natural a born liar, but I had too much to lose.

"Bella, I love you with all my heart and soul. You're the love of my life. Without you, I don't think I would exist. Last night I was wrong, stupid and also incredibly drunk. Yes, I admit I met a woman in a club. I'm not gonna lie to you, so yes I did end up back at her apartment. But I didn't have sex with her. I passed out and woke up this morning feeling terrible about what happened."

Not as terrible as I did for the lie I had just told her. I had to pray that this never saw the light of day. It would crucify the both of us.

"So you expect me to believe that, just because you weren't actually capable of getting it up for her, doesn't mean that you didn't intend to. My God, Edward, do you realize how pathetic that statement sounds? How hollow your profession of love to me is? Are you trying to tell me that you would have had sex with another woman if you hadn't passed out? That it didn't happen because you were either too drunk to get it up, or stay conscious?"

She was nearly hysterical shouting at me. Her arms flying around like a woman possessed as she paced up and down the floor of the lounge. In that moment, I realized the damage that I had inflicted on this beautiful creature in front of me. I felt like a complete shit.

I walked over to the couch, taking her with me and sat down; her hands in mine.

"Bella, I am truly sorry. I don't know what else to say to you other than I am truly sorry. I would do anything to regain your trust. What will it take baby, please?"

I was aware that she had taken her hands out of mine. Then I knew why, she slapped me full and hard across the face. The sting, was a welcomed feeling.

"Thank you so much Edward for apologizing to me; for realizing that this isn't my fault and for begging for my forgiveness. But the damage has already been done. It's so nice to know that the last seven years meant so little to you. I'm not your baby, anymore."

There was real anger contained within her words and it was all directed at me. Tears filled her eyes as she calmly got up walked away from me, stopping only to pick up a small suitcase that she had left in the hallway. I watched, speechless as she walked out of the door and possibly out of my life forever.

In a state of shock, I was left staring at the door as she left. The sting from her hand and from my betrayal, grew more painful and was setting in, weighing very heavily on my heart. I deserved to be punished for hurting her and lying to her. I knew in that moment, that whatever I had coming next, I truly deserved. The guilt started to flood through me; viciously. I had no clue how I was gonna get out of this one. Had I completely ruined what happiness we had?

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><p><strong>Authors Note:<strong>  
>Thanks to Dreamof rob10 for being my beta, she got this back to me and I missed it in my inbox – I am such a fail!<p>

I know you are all gonna be really mad about Edward being such an ass here, but these things happen for a reason, so please do leave me your thoughts. I will answer any questions for you too.

Until next time… Lou x x


	7. Baby Come Back

**Disclaimer: I do not own these characters and no copyright infringement is intended.**

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><p>As the door closed softly behind her, I felt like someone had closed the door on us, on our love. This was my fault entirely. We had argued and fought before. What couple hasn't? The making up was always the best part in my opinion. She had never left me though; never walked out of the door looking like she might not return to me.<p>

My face hurt from where she had slapped me. When I realized she wasn't coming back, I found myself wandering around the apartment going from room to room like a lost soul. Bella was gone, she had left me, I was alone.

Tiredness ran through me and I knew that despite having slept at Heidi's penthouse, I was physically, mentally and emotionally drained. Looking at my watch it was now just before 8am. I needed to pull myself together and go to the office or at least call in and say I would work from home. The latter seemed the best option, although I knew there was no way on earth I would be getting any work done today.

After I let them know my decision, I headed for a shower, which I needed to wash away the stench of sin, which was still lingering on me. Standing under the hot jets as they pounded my skin, I began to scrub myself, and once I started I found I couldn't stop. Every inch of my body was scrubbed clean, although I knew the effects of last night would have far reaching consequences that I was not even beginning to comprehend.

As I stood there thinking through how angry Bella was, when she turned on me, how every word she said hit home like a knife to my guts, I glanced down at my traitorous cock and wished that I could go back in time and have last night all over again, but I couldn't. The cold tiles were against my back as I slid down them and found myself huddled on the floor of the shower, my knees pulled to my chest with my arms wrapped around them, pulling them to me and I felt tears sting my eyes. I couldn't cry, I wasn't the wronged party here. I needed to make this right.

Getting myself to my feet, I knew the first thing that I had to do. Wrapping a towel around my waist, I opened my laptop and ran a search on Google. Once I had located the number I needed, I called it, making an appointment for 11.30 today. Glancing at the time I saw that I had more than enough time to get dressed and make it there. Hopefully all would be okay and I wouldn't have to tell Bella when she came back home tonight. I needed to remain positive about this.

As I walked around the apartment I saw the vase that lay shattered on the floor and I cleaned up the pieces of crystal that were spread across the floor. At least some of this mess could be quickly cleaned up. I just hoped the rest of it would be as easy.

Arriving at the non descript building, I felt like I had been caught with my hand in the cookie jar. I paced up and down outside for a few minutes before taking a deep breath and walking inside. The place was much nicer than I thought it would be, the reception area was bright and airy and just looked like a normal Doctors office. The receptionist looked up at me with a warm bright smile.

"Can I help you sir?"

"I.. I… Erm… I made an appointment this morning." I managed to stammer out, desperate to keep my voice low, embarrassed at being here. She looked at me, producing a clipboard with questionnaire attached to it before she passed me a pen and pointed to the seating area.

"No worries. Fill this in and once you're done, bring it back to me and the nurse will be right with you, Mr?"

"Cullen. Edward Cullen," I whispered before I took the clipboard and sat down to fill in the form. Looking at them they were in depth, and the name at the top in bold lettering brought home where I am and what I have done.

STD Testing Chicago. Your Privacy is Guaranteed. Safe, Confidential, Same-Day STD Testing in Chicago.

I felt sick, as those words brought it all home to me in an instant.

I threw the clipboard onto the chair next to me and ran to the bathroom, locking the door behind me, retching in the toilet. I remained there for a few minutes, trying to catch my breath until I was able to move.

What had I done?

Pulling myself together, I walked back into the reception area where the receptionist gave me a sorry smile and went back to whatever she was working on before my performance.

I had just completed the forms when another door opened and my name was called. I turned to see a nurse standing there beckoning me towards her; my legs somehow managed to move me to her and the door closed behind me with a sickeningly familiar click.

Once they had taken my blood and given me a lecture on the benefits of safe sex, I was given a card with my reference number and web site address. They told me that I could log on after 72 hours to view my results, and should I need to speak to someone they gave me contact number.

I left knowing that these will be the longest 72 hours of my life.

As I made my way slowly back to the apartment, I checked my cell for messages. There were none from Bella. What was I going to tell her if she did come back? Should I lie to her about going to be tested or should I come clean and tell her truth? I would need to play this one by ear, but one thing was for certain, there would be no sexual contact until I got the all clear. It wasn't like I picked up some hooker off the street, this woman clearly had class and a rich boyfriend. There was no way she would have something catching but I just needed to be sure.

Opening the apartment door, I was greeted by silence. I knew she wasn't here, and it felt empty.

Walking into the lounge, I checked the answering machine to find it almost glaring at me with no good news to share. I thought that she would have at least called me, but then again, if she was planning on coming home today, that would make sense.

I collected my nerve and I called her, telling her that I loved her; I was sorry for hurting her and couldn't wait to see her when she came home so we could talk this through.

Hanging up, I decided to cook her a meal to show her how much I love her. Opening and closing cupboards and the fridge several times, I scrapped that idea quickly and went for the take away menus. Lucky Garden was her favorite Chinese takeaway. That would be best, order in lots of her favorite foods and treat her like a princess tonight.

There were hours to go before she would be home from work. I was so tired. I decided to lie down and try to clear my head before the inevitable talk. Once I was on the bed, my eyes closed and I was in a dreamless slumber quickly.

Upon waking, I forgot what had happened earlier and felt disorientated by being home in the daytime. Then everything that happened came crashing, back to me.

Looking at the time, I was horrified to see that I had slept the whole afternoon away and it was now 5pm. Bella was usually home by 6pm at the latest, so I had to move swiftly. I called in the food order and asked them to deliver as quickly as possible. Considering we were regulars that wasn't a problem. They also knew that I would tip them generously.

I turned the oven on low to keep the food warm until Bella arrived and then set places at the table for us. I mentally kicked myself for not getting a replacement vase while I was out today and also flowers to go in it, but that was the least of my problems. I needed to win back the trust and heart of my beloved Bella.

The food arrived quickly as I knew it would and the driver seemed delighted when I tipped him $20 for his trouble.

Placing the food in the oven, I opened myself a beer and sat waiting for Bella to come home. The minutes felt like hours and my eyes kept moving to the clock on the wall tracking the slow passage of time. She was obviously running late, or punishing me for last night.

My hand itched toward my cell phone, and when I saw that there weren't any messages from her, I thought about calling her. Then I remembered my behavior, not twenty four hours before; when I was pissed at her and what had I done.

She probably went to the nearest bar to have a drink. I had visions of her sitting drinking cocktails with Leah; charging each and every one to my Amex. If that is what it took to make her happy, then I would pay the bill. I just wanted her to forgive me and come home.

I opened another beer and waited patiently as the minutes ticked by and turned into hours. The food being kept warm in the oven, was now ruined. I was happy thinking that she was punishing me and would be home soon.

When it got to 9pm, I called her cell phone and got through to her voice-mail. I left a message asking if she was okay, telling her I missed her and wanted her home. When I didn't hear from her by 9.30pm, I called again, and was again passed to voice-mail, so I left another message for her. I thought that she was screening her calls, so I sent her some texts telling her I was sorry and asking her to come home. I kept on phoning and messaging her until I fell asleep on the couch after 2am.

The next morning, I woke and found that Bella still hadn't come home, and that she hadn't returned a single one of my calls or messages. I tried her cell again once I had my coffee and woke up more. I wasn't surprised that it went directly to voice-mail, however I leaped to my cell when I got a text message through minutes later. I knew somehow that this is from Bella.

Reading the message my heart sank, it simply read: "I am safe. Please leave me alone. I need time and space. Don't contact me- B."

What does she mean, "Don't contact me?" I thought that she was coming home to me, so we could sort this out.

I read and re-read the message over and over again, but it still made no sense to me, so I decided to call her. If we spoke we would be able to sort this out. I knew it. However her cell was switched off and there was no way to leave a voice-mail. I thought that this was a mistake, so I called again, there was no mistake.

I tried several more times to call her and got the same thing. I called her office when I knew that Leah would be at lunch to ask to speak to her, and was speechless when I was told that she is away for '_personal reasons'_. Bella never took time off work, ever. I needed to contact her more than ever now and the only option available to me was email.

From: Edward Cullen  
>Sent: Thursday, May 6th, 2010 13:05 PM<br>To: Isabella Swan  
>Subject: Sorry<p>

My darling Bella,

Where are you? You aren't at work I know that much, they have said something about being away from the office for personal reasons, but they didn't know when you would be back. Please don't worry, I didn't say it was me calling. I kinda guessed that you wouldn't have told them everything – have you?

I can't bear to be apart from you like this with no contact. I know that I have done wrong, and I want nothing more to beg your forgiveness. Hell I'll get on my knees from the pitchers mound at the next Cubs home game, if it would mean that you can forgive me and my jealously and stupidity.

You are everything to me, I don't know what to do without you, baby. I am truly lost!

I love you. Please come back to me... to us.

I am begging you here. The bed feels wrong without you in it. I've been sleeping on the couch because I can't be there without you.

I love you more than I can ever say.  
>E x<p>

Pressing send, I felt a sense of relief wash over me. If I couldn't speak to her, this would be the next best thing. When I don't hear back from her and she doesn't answer her phone I felt the panic begin to rise in me. She left and may never come back. I thought of the logical places that she would go, where she would be surrounded by people who care. Picking up the phone I dialed without thinking. I prayed that her dad didn't answer, and luckily I was greeted by Sue, his wife. I asked her if Bella was there with them, and if I could speak to her. Sue was cordial with me, so I wondered if Bella was actually there with them.

Sue had given nothing away and I tried to keep the emotion out of my voice, which was difficult. Bella wasn't there, and I didn't know where to try next. I just have to give her the time and space that she clearly felt that she needed, although I would rather have her here with me.

Over the course of the next few days, I remained working from home, and my family left me alone. Thankfully. I couldn't deal with their interference at the moment and they were all caught up in their own lives.

I kept calling her cell phone, but nothing changed, I sent her more text messages, but got no response. I called her friends, but no-one had heard from her. It was like she had vanished off the face of the earth.

The only good piece of news that I got, was that the STD test results were clear. That was a massive weight off my mind. I didn't doubt it, but having that reassurance meant I could start to relax slightly. All I needed to do was win Bella back.

I tried emailing her again, but I could only say so much more in an email than I could in a text message.

Steeled by a half a bottle of scotch, I typed and poured my heart into the words I was hoping that she would read.

From: Edward Cullen  
>Sent: Sunday, May 9th, 2010 10.40 PM<br>To: Isabella Swan  
>Subject: RE: Sorry<p>

Bella,

I did get your text message and I know that you have asked me not to contact you, but I can't leave things this way. I love you and don't want this to be the end of us. I understand that you need time, but I miss you. I am completely and truly miserable without you here, where you belong, in my arms.

I am nothing without you beside me.

I can only pray that you can find it in your beautiful heart to forgive me for not trusting you and then behaving like a complete ass.

Please reply. I love you, baby.

E x

I sat staring at the screen and drinking more of the liquor, hoping that she would reply.

She didn't reply no matter how hard or long I stared so I fired off another email.

From: Edward Cullen  
>Sent: Sunday, May 9th, 2010 11.55 PM<br>To: Isabella Swan  
>Subject: Re: Sorry<p>

Are you ignoring me? Your phone is switched off and there is no voice-mail – have you switched this off on purpose? I need to talk to you to sort this out. Please! I am going crazy not being able to speak to you or hear your voice!

I have called everyone I can think of (outside of the family obviously) no-one has either heard from you or will tell me where you are if they know.

Where are you hiding? I need to know you still love me.

E x

I finished the bottle and reached for another one; resentment was festering inside me. I just needed to speak to her and she wouldn't give me the time of day.

I love her and would walk across hot coals for her and she couldn't even reply to a simple email.

Fueled by too much scotch and resentment, I drunkenly typed a final email; my swansong and I was prepared to go down fighting.

From: Edward Cullen  
>Sent: Monday, May 10th, 2010 02.55 AM<br>To: Isabella Swan  
>Subject: Goodbye!<p>

Okay, I give in you win!

I am going out of my mind here. If we are over, at least have the decency to tell me. Don't just walk out on me and then send a text message to ask for time to work things out. If we are truly over, then fine, but at least fucking tell me so that I can get on with my life without you in it. As of this moment that is exactly what I feel you are doing.  
>If I don't hear back from you in 3 days, I will take it that you aren't coming back and don't want contact with me. I will arrange for your stuff to be put in a storage facility. I will email you to the details, then leave your life forever so you will <strong>never<strong>have to speak to me again. I am sure that this will make you happy because you don't even have the decency to let me leave you a fucking voice-mail. You really must hate me, to put me through hell like this without any kind of explanation or right of reply.

Wow you really are being a first class bitch about all this I said I was sorry, but it will never be enough for you, will it?

Why did I not see this in you before? I just hope that the next poor sucker is Mr. Perfect for you because you don't seem to want to work at any kind of fucking relationship. What Bella wants, Bella gets.

Well seeing as you want me outta your life, wish granted!

Goodbye,

Edward

Pressing send, I nodded to myself and mentally patted myself on the back at a job well done, then promptly passed out.

When I woke up, I found my face next to my open laptop and wondered what I had done and how I was here. My head was pounding and I groaned in pain as the hangover let me know who was boss around here.

My eyes settled on the open screen, then flitted to the empty Scotch bottles next to it. I stood on shaky legs and headed in search of painkillers. As I stood pouring myself a coffee, a vague memory from the previous night, surfaced of me sending emails, and my heart faltered.

I turned; looking at the laptop. It was almost mocking me, so I made my way over to it. Entering my passwords, I loaded my email program, clicking on sent items. I saw the ones that I had sent to Bella; opening the last one, I dropped the cup on the floor as if it burnt me.

My fingers flew over the keyboard as I tried desperately to undo any damage that might have been done. I had to pray that she hadn't read this yet. There was no way to retract it, and I didn't know her passwords to access her emails to delete it. Shit! I fucked up, again.

From: Edward Cullen  
>Sent: Monday, May 10th, 2010 09.55 AM<br>To: Bella Swan  
>Subject: Re: Goodbye<p>

OMG Bella!

If you haven't read the email I sent before this- PLEASE DON'T! I beg you!

If you have then, please, please, please ignore my last email I was horrified when I realized that I had sent that to you. It's just that I'm not coping without you. I'm such a mess. Needless to say, I hit the bottle way too hard last night to help me cope, which obviously it didn't.

I sent that email out of frustration, anger and the best part of a bottle of vintage Malt. My horror when I came around this morning and saw the laptop open. I checked my outbox and words can't truly explain how I felt. Although if it is any consolation, I have the hangover from hell.

I didn't mean any of what I said in that email. I need you. I can't live without you.

I am truly sorry and beg for your forgiveness.

E x

I spent the rest of the day going between checking my emails, calling Bella's cell phone and trying not to tear my own hair out. I found myself pacing around the apartment, afraid to leave just in case she came home.

I didn't return to work at all. Carlisle thought that I had stomach flu. It was easier than telling him the truth.

I had fucked up the best thing to ever happen to me and I had driven her out of my life possibly... forever.

It was the silence that was the most hurtful. Not knowing what was happening with her and ultimately with us.

Emmett had tried to call me a couple of times, but I had been irritable with him and told him to leave me alone. I knew he was just trying to work out what is going on, but I really wasn't in the mood to talk. My main focus was Bella. I wanted her back, but don't know how to get in touch with her.

Following my massive fuck up the other night, I still hadn't heard back from her.

Deciding that I needed to try, I typed Bella an email; not knowing if or when she would read it, but I needed to tell her how I felt, and how sorry I was.

From: Edward Cullen  
>Sent: Tuesday, May 11th, 2010 10.45 AM<br>To: Bella Swan  
>Subject: Re: Sorry &amp; Goodbye<p>

I am going out of my mind here but you already know that. I tell you in every email! I can't work; Carlisle thinks that I have some kind of stomach flu, so I am off work; confined to the apartment, which is now like a prison. Everywhere I turn there are reminders of you... of us, of what we had and how much I want to have you back here with me. I have turned into one of those ultra needy men. I sleep with your pillow in my arms pretending it's you, but your smell is wearing off it, now.

I want to make this right more than anything in the world and will do anything to gain your forgiveness. Tell me where you are and I will be there to see you. Distance is no object. I just need to see you.

Please Bella?

E x

The ball was firmly in her court. Nothing I had said was a lie. I felt like I was nothing without her. I needed her in my life; she completed me and now that I was on the brink of losing her, I realized just how important to me she really was.

I spent the rest of the day wallowing in self pity; looking through photo albums of us, and I cried my heart out. I just wished that she would speak to me. Emmett kept calling me and I ignored his calls. It was one of those moments to thank God for caller ID.

I moved from room to room, touching objects that reminded me of Bella; seeing the clothes she had left behind, still hanging in the closet. It was like she was here, but my heart knew that she would probably never, ever come back to me.

I heard my email alert go off late that night and I flew to my laptop. To my relief, I saw her name appear in my in-box, finally.

I hesitated before I opened and read the email. Before I dared read the email, I got myself a whiskey to calm my racing nerves.

From: Isabella Swan  
>Sent: Tuesday, May 11th, 2010 9:45 PM<br>To: Edward Cullen  
>Subject: Leave me alone<p>

Edward,

I asked for time and space, yet you can't leave me alone for 48 hours before you start hounding and harassing me.

I am numb over your betrayal. It can't just be removed by the wave of a magic wand which means that I can't forgive you for what you did. You refused to let me explain what had happened when you _**thought**_ you saw me with another man as Mr Self-Righteous Cullen came out and took Mr Jealous-Asshole Cullen with him on a stupid drink fueled rampage. Then _**you**_ end up in some other woman's bed. Whether you screwed her or not isn't the real issue here. Believe it or not, the issue is that the intention was there and yet _**you**_ expect me to just forgive you when you give me the puppy dog eyes and say _'I'm sorry I didn't mean it_'!

Grow up Edward! It won't work on me! I am not some pathetic push over. You either need to respect my wishes to let me work this out in my own and decide what I want, or I will end this now. If that is what you want, then I will arrange to have my belongings collected from the apartment, and you will never see me again. The choice on this matter is yours and yours alone.

As for my friends hiding me, no-one knows where I am. They all think that I am away for work reasons, which is what I want. Of course you won't ask your family if they have heard from me. That would mean that you would actually have to face up what you have done, and we all know that you can't face the wrath of Esme or the look of pure disappointment in Carlisle's face when they realize what you have done to us.

I have spoken to no-one about your betrayal, so I can't begin to understand this myself without having other people give me their opinions.

I will talk you when I have cleared my head and not before. You can't push me around on this one. Right now, I don't care if you miss me and can't live without me. This is a mess of _**YOUR**_ making and _**YOU**_need to realize that I am not Jessica, and never will be, which is a relief to me. As for you, I don't know who you are anymore you aren't the man that I fell in love with.

Right now you have broken my heart and I don't know if it will ever mend, or if I can forgive you. I have never felt like this in my life, so forgive me for not having something to benchmark my pain against like you have with Jessica. I am so sorry that I can't wield such hurt like a weapon against you... like you do to me. Okay, she screwed your best friend, but you were nothing more than children at the time. That is long gone. I had to fight long and hard to get you to realize that I wasn't going to hurt you. Then you go and rip out my heart before you trample all over it- then make me feel bad for wanting time and space.

Bravo Edward... Way to go!

Please do not contact me again unless you really want to lose me forever. You know my terms and I will not be moved on them.

I will be in touch when I am ready to talk and not before.

Bella.

I felt sick. I read, and re-read this over and over again knowing that it wouldn't change the words on the screen, or the anger in which she had typed them to me. The only light at the end of the tunnel is the fact that she hadn't ended it already. She asked me to give her time and space. That was something that I would have to do if I ever wanted her back, and I did want her back more than anything.

I slept again on the couch. I wasn't lying when I told her that I was sleeping there. I couldn't face our bed; it felt wrong being there without her.

The next morning, I didn't bother to check my phone or emails. I knew that she would be in touch when she was ready and not before. I had to resist the urge to contact her; she made that clear. Any contact from me may send her running and the only direction I want her to run, is toward me and not away.

Emmett called me again, and after a short conversation with him, I sat and stared out the window across the city skyline. I must've sat there for hours and before I knew it, the sun was setting and the stars were coming out. I just hoped that wherever Bella was, we were looking at them together; that would somehow bring us together.

The next morning, I ached from sleeping on the couch. I knew I needed to shower and shave, but I couldn't bring myself to care any longer.

I stood, staring out of the window; a glass of whiskey in my hand. It calmed me and kept my brain from running wild, trying to work out all the possibilities of what could be and wondering if she would ever come back to me.

I heard the door to the apartment open and close.

Rolling my eyes, I didn't bother turning around. I expected it to be Emmett. He had threatened to come over and pull me out of whatever funk he thought that I was in, so I snapped, "I told you to stay the fuck away. I am fine and don't need your fucking pity."

I spun around, an angry look on my face, then I saw her. My angel was standing there before me. Any anger I felt washed away in that instant. I stared at her dumbfounded.

I managed to speak in a soft low voice, "Baby, I am so sorry. I thought that you were Emmett bugging me again and trying to find out what's happening".

This isn't how I pictured our reunion and I started to walk toward her, but she held her arm out; hand facing me; stopping me dead in my tracks.

"I'm here, but I'm still not sure we can get through this. You have to realize how badly you've hurt me. You had better be telling me the truth that nothing physical happened, if you're lying, I will find out one way or another and you will never, ever see me again. There are also some ground rules before I move back in. The started ticking off the rules using her fingers,

1. You sleep in the guest room until I say otherwise.  
>2. You do not try anything with me. Don't touch me, and don't try worming your way back into my affections or my bed.<br>3. To the outside world we are a couple. But don't ask any of your family to come around here. I can't face having to put on a show for them.  
>4. Don't set me any deadlines or issue any ultimatums. You don't have any right to do that.<p>

You break **any**of these rules and I leave. You won't get another chance. Understand?"

"Bella, I would walk over hot coals if that's what it'll take to get you back. So yes, whatever you say. I'll respect your wishes. I'm just so glad to have you back."

I felt tears fill my eyes, but I didn't care. The time apart put a harder edge to my Bella. I knew that for us to stand any chance together. I would have to accept her rules and wait.

I would wait forever for her and I needed to show her that I could be patient.

She left me to go to the bedroom; slamming the door. I didn't follow her. Even though I was banished to the spare room, I could sleep at ease knowing that she was back and under the same roof. We weren't sleeping in our bed together, but I knew she was on her way back to me completely, where I needed her to be.

We moved around each other for the next couple of weeks like magnets. There was an obvious tension which was slowly dissipating as we moved back into our old routine. The only difference was that there was always hesitation from me. I felt uncertain and unsure, but I remained the perfect gentleman. I didn't complain once about the rules.

One night out of the blue, she came to join me in the guest room. It shocked me, but when I saw her standing there, I knew we were starting to fix what was shattered by me.

I smiled at her and pulled the covers back. She climbed in the bed with me. Neither of us said a word. She spent the night locked in my arms, and I was happy once again just to have her with me. It took a few more very cautious days and nights, but we were back together how we should be and nothing would break us apart again.

Or so I thought.

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><p><strong>Authors Note:<strong>  
>Thanks to Dream OfRob 10 for betaing this for me and to Delphius Fanfic who held my hand as I had to pull this chapter out of nowhere. As you know this is being reworked and when I did it, this part of the story is told from BPOV and this was missing. It was hard to go back and do this but thanks to Delphius and late night writing circle I did it.<p>

Thanks to everyone is reading and reviewing, and yes I know you are prob gonna hate Edward here so please form an orderly queue to give him a much needed slap! The good news is that the next couple of chapters are beta'd so there should be more frequent updates for you.


	8. A Night To Remember

**A Night To Remember**

**Disclaimer: As always I do not own any of these characters or Twilight we all know who does and no copyright infringement is intended**

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><p>Things have been great between Bella and I, we were still together, going strong despite my major fuck up. But then again, she didn't know the whole story. There hadn't been no further mention of what happened that night or its aftermath from either of us. I knew that I had come so close to throwing away, Bella, the best thing to ever happen to me. I will never, ever let that happen again. I knew that I had lied to her, which is unforgiveable, however this is my burden to carry and deal with. She could never find out. It would completely destroy her.<p>

We were closer than ever, and looking forward to a night out to celebrate Emmett's birthday. It was going to be _'epic'_ in his words. Some of his college friends were in town, so he had planned dinner, which of course our parents will attend, before leaving us to move onto a club. If only I knew which one he had in mind, I would had objected, asked to go somewhere else, or at least been prepared. As the limos pulled up and we walked toward Twilight, I felt myself stiffen at Bella's side. She noticed and frowned at me quizzically; simply giving my hand a squeeze, dazzling me with her best smile. If only she knew where we were, she wouldn't have been so eager to get us inside.

I pushed aside any thoughts of the past. It has been over six months since that fateful night when I was last here. I told myself that people moved on quickly in the nightclub scene. The club looked different, so I reckoned that _she_ couldn't still be here. I walked inside behind my family and the guys, Emmett had invited six of his college friends and they brought their partners with them. We created quite an attraction because they were all ex college football players. The heads of many women were turning, but I only had eyes for one woman; the one on my arm.

We were ushered inside to the VIP lounge. Memories flashed through my head of the VIP lounge. My relief, when I didn't recognize the room from my previous visit, was immense. I realized this wasn't the same room that I had been in before. I didn't think I could handle being in the other room. The room where the worst night of my life started. There was only one way I will get through that night; to drink and try to block out the last time I was here. I kept telling myself it would be as if it never happened. I had to maintain a façade for Bella's sake.

Bella looked amazing at my side, she had on a midnight blue sequinned dress that clung to her curves; just covering her amazing butt, revealing her long slender thighs. Top those with five inch killer heels to complete her look. I nearly refused to let her out of the apartment because she looked so damn fuckable. I didn't want anyone else seeing her. I was trying to keep my jealousy under control lately, but having seen what Rose & Alice were wearing, it was like they were trying to tease us guys all night. I kept telling myself that she was going home with me and that seemed to calm the monster inside me...slightly.

It was completely private in the VIP lounge. We had a drinks waitress, who looked after us and kept champagne flowing for the ladies along with mixed rounds of cocktails. The gentleman in the group, had beers and whisky chasers. It was turning into a great night and Bella was doing everything possible to turn me on; thinking that there was nothing I could do about it. I had other ideas. I succeeded in talking Bella into sneaking to the unisex rest-rooms, so we could have some _'fun'._ When she said _yes_, I thought I had won the lottery.

We snuck into a cubicle, where I began peppering her with soft feather like kisses on her neck. That made her moan in anticipation from the pleasure, that was to come. That made my cock twitch in response, before growing hard in my pants. We were both so incredibly turned on by each other that the thought of getting caught, didn't even register to us.

I was about to yank her short dress up, to show her just how much I loved and wanted her, following her night of teasing and turning me on when I heard my little sisters voice, trilling, "Beeeellllaa, I know you're in here."

We giggled like a couple of school kids trying to stay quiet; hoping she'd go away. This is Alice after all. The next thing I knew, my mobile was ringing; it was Alice. _Dammit! I should've put that on silent._ She knocked on the door saying.

"Bella, I wanna dance and so does Rose. C'mon you can do whatever it is you're doing, when you get home. If you don't come out, I'll tell Emmett and the boys what you're up to in there. You know they won't let you get away with it."

Bella looked at me; pouting and kisses me on the lips before opening the door; leaving me alone and incredibly horny._ Damn my cock-blocking sister. _

I managed to adjust myself before walking back to the VIP lounge; joining the guys. A chorus of cheering and whistling, echoed throughout the room. Alice must've told them anyway. I was rewarded with manly slaps on the back and a celebratory drink thrust into my hand.

Emmett smirked, "Way to go bro, shame I can't talk Rose into being so adventurous. Your lucky security didn't catch you. They're pretty harsh in here".

I grinned; shrugging my shoulders and moved to watch the ladies on the main dance floor. From my position on the balcony. They looked great dancing together; every few minutes looking up to where I was standing.

Bella was being a first class tease. I couldn't wait to get her home and into our bed.

Glancing around, I noticed a man eyeing the ladies from across the dance floor. I watched him as he stared at them. He prowled toward them like he was a predator; making his move.

He started dancing near them. I stiffened immediately and felt a low growl leave my throat. Bella looked so hot that any man in the club would be paying attention to her. Rose and Alice were just as alluring.

I jumped slightly when I felt a hand on my shoulder. I turned to see that Jasper had joined me. He seemed amused by the attention that Alice was attracting in the club. I couldn't understand how he remained so calm.

"Damn, just gotta love the ladies putting on a show for us," he laughed.

"Hmmm... just hope that creep keeps his hands to himself or else there's gonna be trouble," I replied.

Jasper laughed again, "Man, you're too much some times. You know Bella is devoted to you. No-one else gets a second glance. You need to lighten up and trust her."

I spun around to face Jasper. Trust her? Of course I trusted her. I knew now, that she would never betray me like I had her and that shamed me. I didn't say anything. I might've snapped, if I did.

Emmett joined us. "Hey, birthday boy, it's a shame your lady isn't showing you that amount of love," I teased; jerking my thumb toward the girls on the dance floor. His chin hit the floor as he watched them. We slapped him on the back; laughing at him.

The man who was eyeing them up, appeared to have disappeared into the crowd, that made me happy. This night was turning out to be perfect. We are about to return to our table and get more drinks, when I noticed a commotion on the dance floor. I instinctively, looked over to where I had last seen Bella, just in time to see her slap that guy, hard across his face. He simply rubbed his cheek and grinned at her.

Where the fuck had he reappeared from?

I saw several shades of red, mixed with some green. I ran down the stairs, in an instant I was pushing my way through the crowded dance floor, to get to her side. I would kill him if he laid a finger on her. Emmett was only a couple of steps behind me.

"I told you to keep your filthy hands to yourself the first time asshole!" Was all I heard over the pounding music.

"Hey! You heard the lady, now back off and keep your fucking hands off my property!" I was furious.

He turned toward me, cocking his head on one side with a sneer on his lips, then took a swing at me. I moved to the side; he barely grazed my face.

I managed to land a punch of my own; sending him skidding across the crowded dance floor. Before I knew it, one of Emmett's buddies was holding me back, telling me not to get into any trouble. That punk had touched my Bella. I wanted to tear him from limb to limb.

I told Emmett's friend, that I was okay and wasn't gonna do anything else, so he lets me go. Emmett managed to get the guy, who I had punched, in a vice like grip and was now chatting to security telling them what happened and showing his official ID.

I froze when I thought I saw a woman from my past. The one that I would rather forget. She stood at the edge of the room, talking to someone. I had to get away from here. I couldn't risk her being so close to me; possibly recognizing me. Fuck! If she remembered me and said anything to me, then I wouldn't know what to do if anyone in our group heard, my life would definitely be over.

We made our way back to the VIP lounge. Once there, Bella turned on me; anger flashing in her beautiful brown eyes.

"Your property? Your fucking property Edward! What am I, some possession that you own? How fucking dare you refer to me like that! And for your information before you went all macho on him, I was handling it quite well by myself. I don't need you going all protective on me!"

I stood there speechless. I thought she would've been happy that I was there to protect her. I could only watch helpless, as she stormed off across the room. I made my excuses to get out, but I was still angry and said I was going to the rest-room. Emmett laughed at me, taunting me, saying that my pretty face was okay and that Bella is way more capable than I realized. I needed to put some distance between us because we rarely argued. I needed to calm down; giving her space to cool off, too.

I decided to take a look around to see if I actually saw Heidi or it was my drink filled mind that imagined her. I needed to know. I walked around the main dance floor, first. I continued glancing around until, out of nowhere, someone grabbed me from behind; dragging me through an unseen door.

I was on my knees with my arms twisted up my back; facing someone who was the same size and build as Emmett. Shit! Club security. They must've seen me land that punch on the creep.

"What the fuck is going on? I was only protecting myself and my girlfriend. Talk to Emmett Cullen, he's in the VIP lounge. He'll vouch for what happened." I was almost pleading with them.

"You aren't going anywhere. Other than back into the gutter where you belong. Bosses orders."

The security guards weren't taking any crap tonight.

The next thing I knew, a fire door was opened and I was tossed into the alley like a garbage bag. I was drunk and very pissed off.

Maybe I had imagined seeing Heidi again, maybe it was the alcohol and my paranoia at being back in there.

I got to my feet, brushing myself off; trying to regain some dignity. I had never been thrown out of a club before. I started to stagger down the alley toward the street that I could see in the distance. Grabbing my mobile, I called Bella. She was still inside and couldn't hear me properly, but I told her briefly what had happened; that I would make my way home, saying to stay with Emmett and the group. I was fine and would more than make it up to her later.

My last words to her were, "I'm sorry I was an ass. I Love you, B."

As I was ending my call, a vehicle pulled up next to me. At first, I thought it was a taxi, cruising for business, so I turned toward it, hoping that I could flag it down. I quickly realized that it was a van, as it slowed and stopped next to me. The door slid open, I glanced toward it. The last thing I saw was a maniacal grin on a face I half recognized. I was grabbed and wrestled face down in the alleyway. I struggled to get free, but it felt like two men, it could've been more, holding me down. I couldn't figure out what the fuck was going on here?

I tried to shout, but my head was pushed down. They shoved something into my mouth, so I couldn't speak. I started to panic; trying desperately to fight back, but it was useless. They were too strong and in control of the situation.

I felt a sharp pain in my ass, followed by a feeling of warmth coursing through me. I couldn't struggle any more. My limbs refused to work, the whole world went fuzzy and finally my world went black.

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><p><strong>Authors Note:<strong>

Thanks as always go out to my beta DreamsoRob10 for taking this mess and me on and making it all better! LOVE YOU!

Please do leave me a review and let me know your thoughts. This is going through a beta'ing process at the moment and I will post the chapters that I have as long as I know that you are with me on this ride.


	9. Where Am I?

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or any of these characters. No copyright infringement is intended**

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><p>Oh, God, my head was pounding. I couldn't remember how much I had drunk the night before.<p>

I felt myself, regaining what could only be loosely described as, consciousness. My eyelids felt like lead as I forced them open and my throat was on fire. As I come slightly into the world, I swore I hear muttering, but I couldn't work out who it was. Hmm...I wondered if maybe Emmett and Jasper had crashed at our apartment, again, after another of our famous nights out. I worked out that, wherever I passed out, it wasn't our bed; maybe it was the floor considering I felt a hard surface beneath me.

My entire body felt like a ton of bricks. My God, I was getting too old for these all-nighters. Emmett wasn't going to let me forget this any time soon.

My legs refused to move and I soon found out why. As I tried to bring my hands up to my face to rub my eyes, I discovered that they weren't moving independently of each other. What the fuck?! Had the guys played another immature prank on me and tied my hands together? My hands instinctively flew to my hair, FUCK! My hair was gone and it felt like I was sporting a grade two buzz cut. Bella was going kill me for getting so drunk that this happened.

"Emmett! You better fucking explain what the fuck is going on. You're a dead man walking!"

I growled, thinking he would want be close by to witness my reaction to his prank, but all I heard was more muttering and murmuring.

I tried to get myself upright and found that my hands were in handcuffs with a very small length of chain between them. I had the same problem affecting my feet, but the chain on those was fixed through a large iron ring, which in turn, was attached to the floor. There was little room to maneuver in the bindings.

Sudden panic flooded through me. Despite my foggy head and largely unresponsive limbs, I was confused. Emmett and the guys knew how far they could push a joke and this was too far. I had heard countless tales from his college years, of them getting freshmen so drunk, they passed out before they stripped them, leaving them in phone booths, dumpsters and tied to lampposts. That was the kind of pranks that seemed right up his street. Especially now that he had his college buddies in town.

I managed through the haze to take in my surroundings and I appeared to be in some kind of cell. The walls were white concrete and there were no windows. The only light was coming from a passageway, but all I could see outside the door, was another wall.

My brain frantically scrambled to make any sense of this and failed miserably.

"Emmett, Jasper, I'm gonna fucking kill the pair of you unless you let me outta here now!"

I bellowed, ensuring that they would know from my voice, that I wasn't in the mood to continue their games. I was deadly serious and getting angrier by the second.

I fumbled with the handcuffs to see if they had some kind of safety catch so I could at least free my hands, which were starting to ache. There wasn't one.

Damn Emmett. Being a bodyguard, he had access to the real McCoy. There would be no inferior equipment in his kit.

I began to wonder if I could ask him for a pair for me and Bella to use at home together. That thought made me smile. Thinking of Bella, I could only imagine how pissed she was going be at him. That made me smile, more. Considering as big as he was, when my baby got mad, boy does she get mad. It was like a nuclear explosion. She leaves trails of destruction in her wake. Emmett wasn't going to know what has hit him. Then of course there was me. I was known in the family, for being the one with the explosive temper when pushed too far, and fuck if he wasn't pushing my buttons with this stupid prank.

I lay there not knowing where I was or how long I had been there. Had Bella realized that I wasn't home? Was she looking for me? Would Emmett come clean? Then I heard voices and footsteps getting closer to where I was being kept. I feigned sleep. Fuck it, if Emmett wanted to play, then game on brother, let's play...bring it on.

As I lay still, I heard the door to the cell being unlocked and then opened. I made out one set of footsteps coming closer to me. Then I heard a voice that I didn't recognize. "Shit, you think he'd be awake by now. He's been out for nearly twelve hours. Boss won't be happy."

He sounded a little scared and talked to two other men who appeared to be waiting outside.

What? I had been out for twelve hours? Emmett was definitely going pay for this. Then it dawned on me that they called him boss? My brain started scrambling with the information, reaching the conclusion that this must have been part of their little game.

I was then kicked in the back, but I remained on my side and as much as it hurt, I didn't move. I was waiting for my chance for revenge.

Suddenly, I felt hot breath on my face as the man leaned over me. My chance was finally here. The chance I needed to make my move.

I moved my hands quickly and pulled the chain between the handcuffs tight around his neck trying to choke him. "What the…. Demetri the fucker's awake!" was all he managed to get out in a strangled cry, then another man appeared. He was tall and had a menacing look on his face.

He had something in his hand as he moved towards me, I shouted, "Tell Emmett I'm going to kill him for this".

Then, I felt a shooting pain, which made me lose all control over my body. I felt like I had been electrocuted. Only later, would I find out that I had. They had used a Taser weapon on me. As I lost consciousness, I heard, "Who the fuck is Emmett?"

I was woken up by a bucket of ice cold water being thrown over me. I took a sharp breath before trying to move and find that I was bound with my hands behind my back and my legs were bound to the chair legs. I struggled against the bindings, but no luck; they were tight. There was also some kind of hood over my head, Shit! Just how far was Emmett going take this game?

"Emmett, tell your dogs to pack this in. You've had your fun now. Please just let me go. You win!"

It was only then I was aware of someone standing in front of me. I was rewarded with a fist making contact with my jaw. It hurt so fucking bad that my head swam with dizziness.

"Listen pretty boy, I neither know nor care who the fuck Emmett is. You ask for him so often, I'm wondering if maybe he's your lover, but that really doesn't matter anymore, you belong to us now." The voice growled in my ear, sending a chill rushing down my spine.

"So, you really don't know who Emmett is? You're not one of his bitches playing this childish game?" I sounded braver than I felt.

This time, I got a punch in the stomach. That left me winded and in considerable pain. Fury was quickly being replaced by blind panic as I quickly tried to work this out in my head. The voice laughed darkly at my pain and said, "Like I said pretty boy, I don't know anyone by the name fucking Emmett, and I'm no one's bitch".

He must've been getting ready to deliver another blow to me before I heard one of the other men bark instructions at him. "James! Enough! Felix will have your head if you injure him. I'm sure the boss wants that pleasure himself for what he's done."

I had a feeling I should be grateful for this reprieve, but whoever this Felix and Boss that they were talking about, had something nasty in store for me. It started to make me think that a beating at James' hands might be preferable.

This man spoke in an accented voice. My lack of sight helped to hone my hearing and there was a slight French lilt to his voice as he spoke. "My name is Laurent. I'm going to untie you. Don't try to escape or fight me, or you will lose. Plus, I have a little friend here with me"

I heard the unmistakable sound of a gun being cocked. "Now, nod if you understand me and are going to behave yourself this time."

I managed to nod through my terror. "Good man. Now, if you behave yourself, this will be so much easier than if you fight me. You might not believe me, but I am on your side Mr. Cullen. We all make mistakes; it is what makes us human."

What was it with all the references to me making mistakes and doing wrong by whoever their boss was?

As I tried to work out what they meant, I was yanked out of the chair and forced to stand. God...I ached like a bitch all over. I noticed my lip felt split at the corner of my mouth. I could taste the metallic tang of blood and I nearly heaved.

I was being held upright by the two men in the room and kept hooded. Then I heard heavy footsteps enter the room. More panic coursed through me, but I knew not to struggle against them. The last time I tried anything, I was punished.

I heard the footsteps walk around me in a circle, slow and deliberate, before coming to a stop in front of me. A low deep voice said, "Is this what you've brought me? Hmm...looks okay from here. Take those off and let me look into his eyes."

I felt my shirt being ripped open and pulled down my arms as best they could manage. Then the hood was yanked off causing me to blink as my eyes adjusted to the low lighting in the room. There before me, I saw a mountain of a man. Shit...he made Emmett look short and weedy and that took some doing. He was tall and just a pure block of muscle.

He walked back around me, again. He seemed to be assessing me, but I dreaded to think what for.

He came to a stop in front of me, staring directly into my eyes. I couldn't break the eye contact with him. I was compelled.

He had an earpiece in and appeared to be listening to what was being said to him for a few minutes. I decided to break the silence and asked, "Why am I here?"

Before I can blink, I received another low blow to my stomach. If I could've, I would've fallen to my knees with the pain, but I was being held upright.

"Speak only when you're spoken to, you piece of filth!" He shouted right in my face.

"Questions will be answered as and when we see fit. You're nothing to us. You'll do exactly as you're told; otherwise, the consequences will be severe. Trust me, I don't mean just for you. Remember all that. If you speak again, I'll be forced to gag you to curb your tongue."

The second part of his speech was delivered in a low calm voice that was honestly scarier than him shouting at me.

He began pacing up and down in front of me. I thought he was trying to intimidate me with his size and to some extent, it was working.

The henchmen I now knew to be called Demetri, Laurent and James, snickered at his statement. This guy obviously means business and commanded some respect.

"You're now our property, Cullen. You'll remain here at our pleasure and do exactly as we instruct you. Consequences for disobedience are severe and we really don't want to hurt you."

I couldn't help myself, "What the fuck do you think Laurel and Hardy here have been doing? Reading me bedtime fucking stories? Just let me go and I won't say anything to anyone. I don't even know where I am!"

Felix stopped dead in front of me with a bemused look on his face. As he turned to look me in the face, he said, "Strike One." Before he continued his pacing.

I was getting mad now. "What?! You kidnap me randomly off the street, treat me like some prisoner. Tie me up; treat me like shit and you expect me to just take it?"

A smug smile stayed in place as he said to me calmly, "Strike Two Mr. Cullen. Do not continue to try my patience."

I saw red at that point and started struggling against the two men that were holding me and screamed, "Screw you asshole! Just let me go. I've done nothing to you. But I will sure as hell make sure you all pay for this if you don't let me go."

My struggling was to no avail. The smile on Felix's face vanished and was replaced by a look of pure anger as he said, "Strike Three Mr. Cullen. You'll learn obedience and respect."

He motioned to the men who were watching intently and before I could turn my head to see what was happening, I was face down on the cold stone floor with a knee firmly in my back. My legs and arms were being restrained in a vice like grip. I struggled more out of a survival instinct than anything else, but it was useless against three of them and their strength.

I then felt a sharp pain in my ass cheek. It felt like a needle piercing my skin.

I continued to fight as a strange calmness swept rapidly through my body. That was swiftly followed by darkness. Which, as much as I fought against it, claimed me and there really was no point fighting any longer.

* * *

><p><strong>Authors Note:<strong>  
>A million apologies - it seemed that I messed up BIG TIME and forgot to post this! It was only when someone asked me a question about something in Missing and I went back to make sure that I had said it that I found this chapter missing... *SMACKS SELF ABOUT HEAD*<p>

This has been beta'd by Dreamofrob10 – thanks hun!


	10. Meet The Boss

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or any of the characters, we all know who does and no copyright infringement is intended.**

When I came around, I was once again, unsure of my surroundings. I realized that I wasn't in the same place as before. I felt as if I were lying on a bed. I tried to sit up slightly and groaned as I felt dizzy and felt nauseous like I was gonna heave my guts out. I heard a low chuckle and then Laurent spoke softly, "Mr. Cullen, I am so sorry, but if you're feeling hazy, that will be the Haloperidol. I can always arrange for a little pick me up if you require it?"

I tried to move further, but I noticed I was being restrained. My wrists and ankles were tied to the bed and some kind of IV was feeding into my arm. There were all sorts of machines attached to me too.

"What have you done to me you bastard?" I demanded; trying to keep the pure panic that I felt, from spiking in me from my voice as I wriggled in my restraints.

"Mr. Cullen, as I explained previously, I'm probably the closest thing that you'll have to a friend here. You're being looked after in our infirmary, following your meeting with Felix. As you now know, he doesn't like people talking back to him. He was easy on you this time, next time he won't be so lenient."

I choked back a gasp before managing, "Lenient? Fucking easy on me? I'm being held here, for God knows how long, no one will tell me what the fuck is going on or why I'm here. You hit me, beat me, stun me, inject God knows what fucking shit into me, and there you stand with the nerve to ask me to believe that you're my friend!"

Pure anger dripped from my words. I didn't know how Laurent remained so calm. He simply smiled back at me before continuing, "You're being treated by our medical team to ensure that you don't end up dehydrated. You haven't eaten since you got here, over twenty-four hours ago. We knew that you were drinking heavily in the club, although you did eat a healthy dinner with your family and friends. Your wellbeing is of the utmost importance to us. We have no interest in harming you, well not too much anyway." He said snidely, "You need to rest now Mr. Cullen, soon, you'll be meeting The Boss, and anything less than your best, will simply not do."

He was making it sound as if I were a guest, free to leave at any time. It swiftly dawned on me, that I was a prisoner here and not any type of guest. But why I was being held here escaped me.

I closed my eyes as I replayed what he had said about last night. I was with Bella. How did he know these things? I must've been watched all night, for them to know about the meal and the club.

Thinking back to the earlier conversation, where he said it wasn't about money, it was about 'honor'. I hadn't done anyone a dishonor, as far as I was aware, so this made no sense to me.

"Laurent, why am I here, please? Just tell me. I have family and a girlfriend, who will be worried about me. Please, just free me and I promise nothing will happen to you, I swear on my girlfriends' life." I pleaded, heavily.

I was so close to breaking down, but I had to keep my emotions under control to show weakness would be foolish.

"Mr. Cullen, it's not my quarrel with you. I'm simply a servant who carries out the commands from his Bosses. All will be revealed to you soon. Now I suggest you rest. Do you need for me to arrange for you to be sedated again?"

I choked out a strangled sob. "No, please, just let me go. Please, I'm begging you. I'll do anything. I can't stay here."

I was fighting a losing battle with my emotions. They were running wild through me. I knew this had to be a mixture of the terror, and the effects of whatever shit they had pumped into me, to sedate me.

His expression changed and a glimmer of sorrow was in his eyes as he spoke softly, "Edward, I'm sorry, but there isn't anything that I can do. My hands are tied, in the metaphorical sense of course. Just do as you're told by the Boss, and you won't be badly harmed. This is the best advice that I can give you. Also, watch yourself around James, I have no idea what you've done to him, but he really doesn't like you. He'll take any opportunity, no matter how small, to hurt you. Just be careful."

He left after giving me my fair warning.

I must've dozed off, again, but after what felt like only ten minutes of sleep, Laurent was leaning over me, shaking me awake.

During my short nap, I dreamed, and they were vivid of my Bella, but I swore that she was moving away from me in them; it must have been a side-effect of the drugs.

"Edward, I'm going to remove your restraints, to get you off the bed. But I'll have to put you back in them. The pleasure of your company has been requested by the Boss."

A shudder ran through me, followed by a faint glimmer of hope. If I could speak to the person in charge, then maybe he'll see that this was all a mistake and let me go.

I complied with Laurent's request; aware that James was lurking in the background. I could smell his cigarette, and as much as I would love a rematch with James, given our previous meeting, I would need to be free from the restraints.

"Sorry, but I have to cover your head again. You'll need to trust me to lead you. Do you trust me Edward?"

Laurent took my small nod as_ yes_, and once I was on my feet, he placed a smelly sack over my head. Breathe; just remember deep calming breaths, I told myself. I kept that thought in my head, as I was taken through the endless passageways, it felt like a labyrinth. I would never be able to find my own way out of here, if given the chance.

I became aware that the air suddenly changed, it became clearer. I could hear people talking in hushed tones, and then we walked across, what felt like heaven, to my feet a carpeted floor. I had previously been walking barefoot on an uneven cold stone floor.

My hearing compensated for not being able to see. I could hear, what I thought were birds singing and voices that stopped, as we passed by. Then the muttering started up again, once we passed. I must have looked like some kind of freak show attraction, bound and led with a bag over my head.

I was brought to an abrupt halt and Laurent whispered in my ear. "We're here. Just remember, don't do anything reckless and I'm sure that you'll be fine."

I felt drained and lethargic, no doubt a result of the sedative, but I slowly felt like I was coming back around; becoming more lucid. If there was a chance to be free, any chance at all, I would grasp it with both hands, regardless of the cost to me.

I heard someone knock on a door, before it opened. The hinges creaked slightly. A voice that I didn't recognize, spoke out, "Come in Laurent, we've been expecting you."

After being pushed forward into the room, I heard Laurent announce, "Boss, Mr. Cullen is here to see you as requested."

It sounded like I was being led into a business meeting. I snorted at this thought, only to be hit in my back before hearing, "Shut it, or I'll make you regret it, Cullen."

He was so close to my ear, which I could feel his hot breath through the rough sack and it made me shudder.

My hand restraints were removed, although I had no idea why. My wrists were sore from being held together. I wanted, so badly, to rub them, to get some feeling back, but I stood still; not moving a muscle.

I could hear the ticking of a clock. It was the old fashioned type, like a grandfather clock. It reminded me of home because Esme had one.

The ticking also reminded me of a heartbeat; slow and rhythmical. I could hear someone typing on a computer keyboard, but I couldn't hear any other sounds around me.

After what felt like forever, the typing stopped, and then a low calm voice broke the imposing silence. A chill went right through me when I heard, "Mr. Cullen, welcome to Volterra. You're here at my express invitation, my guest if you will. I hope that you're enjoying your stay?"

"You fucking bastard! You think that I asked to be brought here after being drugged and then beaten, kept against my will and you call me your fucking guest?"

I knew that I would pay for my outburst, but I didn't care. This was obviously the man in charge around here; the person responsible for my incarceration. I was so angry, and he needed to know.

My eyes were blinded by the light when the hood was unceremoniously, ripped off my head. I blinked several times, trying to adjust to natural light after the darkness of my cell.

When I managed to focus through slightly squinted eyes, I saw him. He was sat on a large, black leather chair that reminded me of a throne. It had a high back and regal arm rests. He sat there with serious features, long black hair; his elbows were resting on the chair arms. His finger tips of his index fingers, pressed together, touching his chin. He looked deep in thought. I knew instantly that he meant business and wasn't someone to be messed with.

He laughed manically, before a smile settled on his face. He started to greet me, as if we were old friends and like my outburst had never happened.

"Mr. Cullen, please forgive my apparent lack of manners. I've been away, so this is the first chance we've had to meet formally. My name is Aro, but you can call me, Sir. I understand that you've been, somewhat difficult since your arrival. I will not tolerate insolence or your ungrateful attitude. You're very lucky to still be alive. I could have just as easily, ended you. Trust me when I say that was an option that I considered for a long time."

He stood slowly and deliberately, walking over to a set of French doors, that overlooked the gardens. He looked back and gestured to James, Laurent and the others that were assembled in the room, to leave us. They bowed slightly to him, and obeyed, although I suspected that they wouldn't be too far away.

I stood without any restraints or reminders to hold me back. I could quite easily close the distance from where I stood, to him, and do some serious damage. That thought suddenly became very appealing. I watched him. There was something about him that felt familiar. He was a striking man, in appearance, but I couldn't place where I knew him from.

He spoke without turning back to me, "I know that you're confused at the moment Mr. Cullen, but let me make things clear to you. I've been gravely disrespected, on a most personal level, by you. My honour, pride and reputation were damaged and let me add, almost beyond repair. I simply couldn't let it pass. You see, the others will start to get ideas, my authority and position will be questioned. I cannot and will not allow that to happen."

"What the fuck have I done to you to deserve this inhumane treatment? I need to know, please?" I spoke in a calm voice, which was a world away from what I was feeling inside.

His reaction startled me, somewhat. He spun around; eyes blazing pure anger, "_You_ defiled my property Mr. Cullen. _You_ disrespected me in the most serious of ways. _You_ need to pay for that insult. You're nothing to me, but I _will_ have my vengeance. I could rape your whore or maybe arrange for James to do it. I'm sure that she would love to know what a real man feels like inside her, not some pathetic imitation. Bella is it? Or does she prefer Isabella?"

My anger boiled as he smirked at me; taunting me with threats toward the woman that I loved. He called her a whore, he would pay for that. I moved before I thought it through; screaming I launched myself across the room, at him. I was ready to rip his throat out with my bare hands.

I only made it a few steps, before I was brought to my knees,. My back, and groin, felt like they were in flames. I was down on the floor, rolling around to try and make it stop. Screaming out in agonizing pain.

I glanced up, seeing him walk slowly toward me; bending down, he sneered at my, pain ridden face, saying, "I see that you like my new toy, Mr. Cullen. You're wearing the REACT belt. Very effective at stopping people, and much cleaner than a gun. I had this one specially upgraded from the 50K volts, it now has a little extra kick to it. The shock you're feeling is delivered via remote control, directly around your body. I did warn you not to disrespect me." He motioned to a couple of his minions who must've re-entered the room. "Restrain him."

The pain started to subside, slightly and I knew my legs wouldn't hold my weight if I was forced to stand. I was yanked off the floor, pushed to my knees with my arms behind my back. My head dropped down, before it was grabbed and held up, so that I could see his face clearly. To say I was terrified was an understatement, fear ran through my blood, seeping into every part of me. I feared that this was the end, that I would die here.

He walked back to his desk, sitting back down in his throne, where he picked up a remote control. I instantly flinched, thinking that I would be receiving more shocks like I just had. He saw my reaction and laughed.

The lights dimmed and a large flat screen TV lit up. More buttons were pressed on his computer, suddenly I was greeted to a slideshow of images, firstly of me. They were taken at different times and places; they are of me doing normal everyday things such as hailing a cab, getting coffee from Starbucks near my office. I was confused.

My heart sunk when the images changed. There she was, Bella, my Bella. I drew in a sharp breath. I knew these were very recent because she had her pride and joy on her arm, the Prada Handbag, Tanya her boss, had bought for her as her work anniversary present.

My heart sank even lower, if that were possible. Images of my family started popping up. I was even more confused as to what was going on here. How did he know them? And why were they being photographed? I wanted answers.

"What the fuck do you think you're doing, you piece of shit! Are you some fucking pervert, getting your rocks off by taking these photographs?" I spat out in pure anger and rage, "I swear I will kill you. I'll rip your fucking heart out, if you harm any of them!"

I expected to be shocked again, and I wasn't disappointed. This time, I was held in place, while the punishment was delivered to me. I had tears streaming down my face; the pain was is so intense.

"Hold your fucking filthy tongue or I'll remove it!" Is was only response that he gave before motioning to someone and the next thing that I knew, a ball gag was being placed securely in my mouth so I couldn't speak further.

"You've been warned - again Cullen." Spat James, as he moved away from me.

I struggled to get myself free, but I knew it was a pointless task. Adrenalin kicked in and I was sure that I was about to be killed here and I wanted at least want to go down fighting. My head was once again, forced to look at the screen. I watched the video that was being played. The images that confronted me were ones that I had tried to erase from my memory. I watched me and Heidi, in Twilight the night I made the biggest mistake of my life. It was obviously security footage and it showed us drinking, flirting and touching each other before she got up and suddenly left, with me leaving shortly afterwards. The video turned to the lobby of her apartment building, then the elevator. Oh, God! When I remembered how I nearly took her in the elevator, I was ashamed. The footage switched to the interior of the apartment and my ultimate shame was laid bare for all to see. I wanted to badly, to die in that moment. I wanted him to kill me, more than anything. How could I live with myself? I had done my best to block out that night and here it was taunting me in high definition color (luckily no sound).

I closed my eyes; squeezing them shut, as more tears started to fall down my face. I was sobbing uncontrollably, but the sound couldn't escape past the gag, they had put in my mouth. I fell to the ground as both, James and Laurent let me go. I laid on the floor; desperate sobs escaping from my chest.

Aro stood tall, over me without a glimmer of emotion before he spoke, "Now Mr. Cullen, you know the truth about why you're here. She was my property, not yours. You can't just go around fucking whatever catches your eye and expect there not be repercussions." He knelt down in front of me. "You're here now because I had to clean up the mess that you left behind. Not only did you fuck my property, you had the audacity to leave behind a permanent reminder. Imagine my surprise when the little whore tells me she's pregnant. Especially since I knew that I couldn't have children, so I knew that she had fucked someone else. Then I find that it was in the apartment that I pay for, in my fucking bed!"

I heard the emotion in his words, it made his voice crack. He took a deep breath, but he swiftly brought whatever emotions he felt back under control before he continued, "You've been a very hard man to track down, but as you can see I know all about your life and family. Make no mistake; I will not hesitate in striking out at them if you disappoint me. I'm a man of my word. I have plans for you, but first I need you to accept that you're not leaving anytime soon. You will remain here until I see fit. Escape and I will have my revenge. Your mother, Esme, isn't it? Well I would hate to see her or your father Carlisle have some terrible accident, one where maybe they were not killed, but lived the rest of their lives wishing that they had been. As for Isabella, well, she would make a lovely mate for any one of my guard, willing or otherwise, she wouldn't have a choice." Pausing for a moment he moved over to his desk and produced my cell phone. "She has been quite relentless in trying to reach you. She obviously loves you very much, but I managed to put her off with minimal responses."

He leaned forward; removing the gag from my mouth. I sobbed uncontrollably. That night was the biggest mistake of my life and now I was being told that there was a permanent reminder of it? I wanted to be sick, but my stomach was empty.

Then it clicked, I realized where I knew him from. He was the guy that I bumped into while trying to leave the apartment the next morning. He must be the lover she was so scared of, obviously with good reason. I managed to compose myself enough to utter, "She's pregnant, and it's mine?"

I was greeted with a hand across the back of my face before he growled, "Yes, you fucking piece of scum, you managed in one night to plant your inferior seed into my lover. Then she had the nerve to try and pass your bastard growing inside her, as mine."

He quickly regained his emotional calm before simply stating, "Don't worry, it has been taken care of and is no longer of any importance."

He waved his hand in the air, dramatically as he spoke. I felt like I had been punched in the gut. There had been a baby but not anymore.

"Now we need to put the next part of my plan into action. You're to go with Laurent and James, who will supervise you while you write letters home to your whore and family, explaining your absence. If you try anything, think about what I said, Aro Volturi does not offer second chances."

With that, he motioned to James and Laurent, who each took an arm, dragging me out of the room. We went back down to the underground area where I was previously held. Apart from this time I was taken, to a new room, which contained a small table and single chair. I saw a pen and paper waiting for me. Unceremoniously, I was pushed onto the chair, and I let more sobs out, that I hadn't been able to hold in. What had I done?

My hands were slammed onto the table and a pen thrust into one of them, "You are to write 2 letters home. One to your fucking filthy whore, the other to your family. You must be such a disappointment to them." Sneered James. "Any funny business and well, you don't want me to tell you what I will do to Bella." He laughed.

I knew in that moment that there was no way out of this. I had to protect Bella. Hearing her name, on that bastards lips, made me feel sick. The only choice that I had was to stay. That way, she would be kept safe. I obviously needed to pay for that one night of madness. I had lied to everyone that I loved and cared about. This would be my penance.

I managed to get another woman pregnant. What exactly happened to her and my unborn child, was still a mystery to me. However, that didn't stop the guilt washing over me, in waves. I didn't deserve happiness, to be free and enjoy my life. I had committed the worst sin imaginable and I risked breaking not only Bella's heart but also Esme's.

I had to protect them; deep down I knew that Aro would have no second thoughts, in carrying out his threats of violence or worse, against them. I truly deserved to be here and they deserved to be happy and safe. I knew they would want to find me, part of me wanted to be found so that I could finally tell her the truth and see if she would find it her heart, to ever forgive me.

Taking the pen in my hand what I really wanted to do was ram it deep into James's neck with the hope of killing him. But what would happen to me then? To Bella dna my family? I couldn't face that though so I took a deep breath and pulled a piece of paper towards me. A little voice in my head told me to make this good.

**Authors Note:**

Phew! He is in a bit of a mess here isn't he, will things get any better? Thanks as always to DreamofRob10 for being my beta and helping me fix this up to re-post it – MWAH!

I would like to say Happy Birthday also to Kirst74 who asked me in the early hours of this morning if I had any updates, this is her fave so I sent her this chapter early :-X

As always thanks for reading and please do let me know what you think with a review.


	11. Letters Home

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or any of these characters and no copyright infringement is intended**

**Little warning in the letters home you will probably think that I have gone crazy with the capitals in places. This is on purpose. Edward is sneaking a hidden message into the letter home, please bear in mind that these letters will be handwritten so it would be easy to sneak a message into them.**

I sat there knowing that whatever I wrote was going to be read closely, so I had to make them seem convincing to both them, Bella and Esme. I wanted them to believe that what I was saying was true. Part of me wanted them to not believe the lie and to look for me. I knew that was selfish, but I also knew that Bella had connections in law enforcement through her father, Charlie, and then there was Jacob. The irony of the fact that I might need Jacobs help didn't escape me. He was an agent, and would know what to do. Hell, he was probably already watching this guy for whatever fucked up shit you needed to be involved in that got you a house like this and people calling you _'Boss'_. I could only hope that Jacob was lurking somewhere.

Writing the letter to Bella broke my heart, but not as much as I knew that reading it would break hers. But this had to be done, there was no other choice. So I began to write:

Bella,

How do I begin to tell you how I feel? Everywhere I go I can't escape from how I have been feeling. We've been together for a while now, and to be honest this is just not working for me. I have to say that yes, these have been some of the happiest times of my Life, but at the same time, some of the worst. I don't love you anymore, and I have left to try and Perhaps rebuild My lifE in another city.

Things are just not right here and there is nothing that I can do to escaPe from this. I want you to move on with your LifE; there is no way out of this for me. And nothing that I can do to make this any easier for you than to tell you how I feel.

Right now, I'm lost and alone; there is no-one I can turn to. I'm feeling trapped and suffocated by our relationship and your love for me. I'm sorry that I have to do this to you by this method, I just can't face you right now and speak to you face to face. I know that you won't take the news well and will try your best to talk me out of this, but that can't happen – we are over; there is no future for us. I would not only be deluding myself but also robbing you of a true chance of happiness to continue our relationship, you deserve better than that, better than me.

I need to figure out where to go next with my life and I know that this doesn't involve you. I feel trapped and like a prisoner with all this hanging over me, your fate is linked to mine so closely. Maybe one day we'll be able to sit in the same room again, maybe we won't. Who knows what fate has in store for us.

I know that you have a great circle of friends, who will support you such as Jake. I know that my family loves you very much and will support you through this. Please don't shut them out because of this, because of me; they know nothing of my decision. Jake may be able to offer you the life I can't. He loves you, he always has. I'm sure that he would like nothing more than to fill my place at your side. Put your trust in him to do the right thing for you, my angel.

I know you won't understand right now, what I am saying to you here, take your time but read between the lines and you will see the truth.

_**DON'T **_look for me immediately. This will only end up hurting us both in the long run and you know that I would die before I see you hurt again. It is better this way.

Where-ever you are and no matter who you are with, you will always have a small piece of my heart... always.

Goodbye and stay safe.

Edward

The next letter would be a near carbon copy of the letter to Bella; just key words to be changed. I knew that they would get together and compare them. The similarities would be noticeable to those who knew me well. They wouldn't expect that from me, or so I hoped. But to anyone else, they would just think that I was playing safe. I'm sure that they would soon let me know if they realized what I was doing.

Dearest Mom and Dad,

How do I begin to tell you how I feel? Everywhere I go I can't escape from how I have been feeling and am sure that my choices will disappoint you and for that, I am sorry.

Things are just not right here and there is nothing that I can do to escape from this. There isn't any way out of this and there nothing that I can do to make this any easier than to tell you how I feel.

Right now, I'm lost and alone. There is no-one I can turn to. I'm feeling trapped and suffocated by my Life. I'm sorry that I have to do this to you by this method. I just can't face you right now and sPeak to you face to face. I know that you won't take the news well and will try your best to talk me out of this. This cannot happen – we are over there is no future for us and I would be deluding myself, and Bella if I said there was.

I need to figure out where to go next with my life and I know that this doesn't involve you, but I feel trapped and like a prisoner. Maybe one day wE will all be able to sit in the same room, maybe we won't, who knows what fate has in store for us.

I know that you have a great circle of friends who will suPport you as will ALice and Emmett. I also know that Bella will be left hurting by my choices, and I ask that you Support her through this. PleasE don't let her shut you out because of this. Jake may be able to offer Bella the life that I can't. He loves her; always has and I'm sure that he would like nothing more than to fill my place at her side. I also think that he will make a fantastic replacement for me in your lives; he won't let you down, as I have.

I know you won't understand right now, what I am saying to you here, but take your time with this, read between the lines and you will see the truth.

_**DON'T**_ look for me. This will only end up hurting us all, in the long run. It is better this way.

Where-ever I am and no matter what I do, you will always be in my heart... always.

Goodbye and stay safe.

Edward

Once I was done, I slumped over the desk and began to sob, again. My head was yanked up and I found myself staring straight into James' eyes. He found amusement in my torment, that was clear.

"Let's read what pathetic lies you've told your little whore this time." He read the letter and continued, "Oh dear very emotive. I can just see her reading it now. Her poor little heart breaking, sobbing away into her pillow every night. Maybe I should step into the gap that you left, Cullen. She could use a real man."

His pathetic attempts to get a reaction out of me, didn't work. I was truly broken and empty; there was nothing left to break in me.

James left the room with the letters in his hand, laughing as he went. Leaving me alone with Laurent. He came over to me and said, "Edward, I need to return you to your cell. The Boss will want to see you later to discuss your future here. I know that you won't give me any trouble, so I'm going to trust you and take you back by myself. I should wait for James, please don't make my regret this decision."

I looked at him; he could see there wasn't any fight left in me, so I stood and allowed myself to be led back down into the darkness.

Once in my cell, I found that I had been given a bed of some sorts. It was better than the floor, which was my only other option. At least now, there something that would pass for bathroom facilities, too, although no privacy. Food had also been provided, but I didn't want to eat.

When Laurent left, I curled up in the foetal position, hoping that this would give me some comfort. As I laid there, the results of my meeting with Aro, replayed in my mind. Heidi was pregnant and it was mine? I remembered that we had unprotected sex, which I knew as foolish. When Bella left me, I went straight to the nearest clinic and got myself checked out. Waiting for those results was hell, but not as much hell as knowing that I ruined the best thing to ever happen to me. I never entertained the thought that Heidi could end up pregnant.

Now, it was all that I could think about. What happened to the baby? Then again, Aro's throwaway comment about _'taking care of it', _sent a chill through me.

Would he really harm an innocent baby? I shuddered to think of it, but he seemed to be capable of anything. After all, he managed to find and get me here, and to make matters worse, he had details of all my family. He had them, Bella and me followed and we never noticed. How was it even possible?

A million different questions flooded my mind and I knew that I would never get the answers. The only thing I was glad of was that if Bella chose to believe my lie, the last words I said to her were that I loved her. How poignant... most people wished that could be the last words they would say to a loved one, and I had done it without meaning to.

I reflected on just what a bastard I was. Right now, I hated myself so much for what I had done. I honestly thought that I would get away with it scot free. I was now paying with my freedom and possibly my life. I couldn't see any way out of this. I was going to be here for a very long time. There was no way that they would let me go. I would just have to see what my new future looked like. I would do whatever was required, to keep Bella and my family safe. They were my Achilles heel. I hated the thought of them coming to any harm because of me and my foolish actions. I had protect them at all costs. The thought of James being within ten miles of Bella, made me feel sick, and I had no doubt that he would love to carry out his threats towards her.

I slept fitfully, as I kept being awoken by nightmares. I could see Bella standing, smiling at me, holding her arms open as I walked toward her. Then she would suddenly hold her chest in pain, as a bullet ripped through her; causing her to fall to the ground. When I reached for her, she died in my arms.

I woke in a cold sweat, relieved that I had been dreaming, then realized that my part of the nightmare, was all too true. I was a prisoner, at the mercy of a madman and his bunch of crazy henchmen.

I remained there for what must've been hours, staring blankly into the darkness. I had no sense of time here; I didn't know if it was day or night, or even what day of the week it was. I heard footsteps coming toward my cell, and when I looked, it was Laurent. He stood with a look of true pity on his face; he could see how broken I was and he spoke softly to me, "The Boss was pleased with the letters. They have been delivered now, so all ties to the outside world have now been severed. No-one will be looking for you; they will think that you have left. Trust me when I say that this is for the best. They need to forget you, and you them. I don't say these things to hurt you. I wish that you weren't here; mixed up in this world, but fate has dealt your hand and you must play it. Now, I suggest that you eat and rest, as your training will be starting with Felix soon. You will need all your strength for that."

With that, he pushed some food through the cell bars. I turned my back to this, refusing to let him or anyone see that tears were freely falling down my face. I was lost and alone. I had been taken from those that I loved and cared for. There was nothing that I could do other than to comply with Aro's' wishes, or die defying him. Those choices were bleak. Either way, I would lose, but would Bella and my family be harmed if I were dead? Would that be the best option for all concerned? I was sure that if I pushed James or Felix far enough, one of them would snap and end my miserable existence. That right now, felt like a great option, but would it leave Bella and my family safe or in more danger? I knew that I couldn't stay here nor could I ignore Aro's threats. They were not veiled; they were a clear and present danger.

I had much to decide...stay or die?

**Authors Note:**  
>Thanks again to the very fabulous DreamOfRob10 for betaing this for me and doing such a great job – mwah!<p>

I hope that the letters home were not too confusing for you all, these were hard to write as Edward needed to get a message hidden in them, and to make it easier for you all I left in capitals what will be his message. Help me please. There are other parts of the letters that when they are looked at people can pick up on the other parts, lost and alone, trapped, don't look for me etc etc. But will they see them? Who knows!

Thanks to everyone who reads and reviews. I have recently posted the most angsty one shot that I wrote for an Angst contest, be warned it is dark, but if that is your thing, pop over to my profile and check it out.


	12. Texts & Voicemails

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or any of these characters. The storyline is my own and no copyright infringement is intended.**

I must've fallen back to sleep, this time thankfully. . . dreamless.

I was woken by the sounds of the heavy metal door being opened, but before I could sit upright to acknowledge the visitors presence, I was restrained on the bed. I felt a knee in my back and my arms were grabbed and pulled behind me. The all too familiar cold metal of handcuffs were being placed around my wrist. Once secured, I was dragged to my feet only to hear James leer in my ear, "On your fucking knees scum. Boss is on his way to see you."

I complied, knowing it would be pointless not to. Resistance would only end up in more pain for me and much more enjoyment for the sadistic bastard at my side.

I knelt on the cold stone floor and waited; my mind racing, wondering what he wanted with me now. He had humiliated me enough as it was, but maybe if I played along with whatever sadistic game he had in mind, I would be able to talk to him; find out more about my child, if there was even one.

I didn't have to wait long before I heard slow, measured footsteps echoing through the corridors as they made their way toward me through the maze of tunnels. When he arrived he had a smile on his face which put me on edge. I didn't know why, but from our earlier meeting seemed that he was dangerous regardless of his mood.

"Ah, Mr. Cullen, nice to see that you settled in." He gestured around the room before turning back to me, looking quizzically, almost expecting an answer.

I was pushed sharply in the back as James snarled, "Answer him!"

"Yeah just like the fucking Hilton here, thanks. Never been so comfortable in my entire life. Although, the room service sucks, and the maid service, well…"

I was abruptly silenced by the back of Aro's hand swinging to make contact with my jaw. I felt the blood pool in my mouth. For a small man, he packed a hell of a backhand.

"Your insolence will stop or I will have it beaten out of you. I've already told you not to push me, Cullen and yet you try my patience, yet again. I'll have to ask Felix to go over the ground rules for your stay here in intimate detail. Don't forget our earlier meeting. As much as I don't want to, I will use your belt against you."

A panicked look must've crossed my face because he clapped his hands together in delight before continuing, "Ah, I see you remember the little shock treatment. Make no mistake, you will remain fitted with that device, and I won't hesitate to use it for further outbursts of insolence. Now, there is a more pressing matter at hand that I wish to discuss with you. However, here is not the place for that. James, bring Mr. Cullen to me in the antechamber. I will speak with him there."

With that, he swept out of the room.

James dragged me to my feet. As he did so, I spat out the blood that had built up in my mouth and surveyed the damage with my tongue. It felt like a split lip, maybe some bruising. That would heal okay and at least my teeth were intact. James just laughed sadistically. He had a baseball bat in his hand, and pushed me continually in the back to make me walk forward.

We arrived at the room where I had written my letters to find there was now another chair at the table. Aro was sat at one side and he indicated that I should sit at the other. This was uncomfortable to say the least, as my hands were still cuffed behind me. Aro noticed this and told James to cuff them at the front. It wasn't a case of being asked ,he was more or less commanded. I couldn't resist the chance to wind him up when he was in front of me to secure them saying in low voice, "Good doggy."

Anger flashed through his eyes as he raised his fist to punch me. I smiled at him, almost taunting him before a sharp voice interrupted, "James! I hand out the punishments here. You will do well to remember that."

Aro glared at him, daring defiance and none came. James dropped his fist and his head mumbling, "Yes Boss. I am sorry."

Wow, whatever hold he had on him was strong. Aro waited until James stood to the side, leaving just the two of us sitting at the table.

"Mr Cullen, your whore is making my life more complicated than I anticipated. She won't stop calling or texting you."

He threw my cell phone on the table between us. How I wished that I could grab it and make just one call, "She's received your letter and accompanying flowers, but she seems to want to speak to you for some unknown reason. I must say, she is a proper little firecracker when she gets angry. I bet she is a demon in bed when riled up."

I knew that he was taunting me; wanting a reaction, so I refused to give one. I simply replied almost in a whisper, "It's one of the many things that I love about her. She won't take no for an answer. I doubt that she'll believe I would leave her this way; it's not my style."

He brought his fists down on the table hard causing my cell phone to bounce on it, screaming at me, "Well it is now! She needs to realize what a spineless and worthless bastard you truly are. Once she recognizes this, think how much better her life will be without you." He paused, then in a calmer voice continued, "But I know to achieve this, you'll need to tell her yourself because text messages, letters and flowers are clearly not doing it. I know that she is angry with you; I can hear it in the voice-mails she leaves. Would you like to hear them?"

I was unsure if this was a joke or not. I nodded my head slowly. He found this amusing and grabbed the phone from the table. He dialled into my voice-mail allowing me to listen on speaker saying, "These are my favorites. I have, of course, been responding to the text messages, and she doesn't seem to be very happy with them."

My beautiful Bella's voice filled the room as I listened to the messages she had been leaving for me; not knowing that I would never be able to respond.

"_Hey baby where are you? I'm here at home waiting for you to join me. I'm worried, please call me back. Love you."_

"_Edward Anthony Masen Cullen, don't you dare pull this shit on me, again. Where the fuck are you?"_

"_Edward, you really are a spineless bastard. You dump me by letter? Sending cheap fucking flowers as an apology? You clearly don't have the fucking balls to do it to my face. I gave you, I gave us another chance when really I could've walked away after your night with that slut and this is how you repay me? Well fuck you Cullen! I hope whatever whore you are screwing is worth it!"_

"_So, I guess from the fact that you sneak in here to take your stuff while I'm not here, really does tell me a lot doesn't it. I thought that maybe you would be a man about it and at least be able to face me. I'm sure that I will have no issues finding someone to fill your empty space in my bed. If this is what you want, then fine. Goodbye Edward, been nice knowing you."_

My heart broke in two. Hearing her voice out loud, tore through my soul. To hear her getting angrier and angrier with each voice-mail. Then seeing that Aro was enjoying this little game, "There's also messages from your family. They're also very concerned for you. For now, I'm concentrating on her because she means so much to you; it's written across your face. I want you to record a voice message for her, that way she'll know that you've come to no harm, yet. I'll write the message, and you'll repeat it word for word. Any attempt to say anything other what I have written, I'll hurt you, and then her. Make no mistake about that, I'll bring her here and allow my men to enjoy her while you're forced to watch; helpless. Then maybe I'll kill her, again, while you watch. Do I make myself understood?"

I nodded. There was no point fighting him on this. I had no doubt about his ability to do what he threatened to do Bella.

He got up and left the room, leaving me alone with a silent, but smirking James. He stood there like a statue watching me while my mind raced. Could I possibly manage to get a coded message into the voice message to Bella? I had managed it with my letters. I suppose that was easier because they were written by me, but the message was to be dictated to me. There was hope as Bella clearly didn't want to give up on me, on us without a fight. I just had to hope that she had seen my message in the letter. Then again, that might take time for her to find; I had to hold onto the hope that she would pour over the letter endlessly. I knew that I had to be patient in hoping that she would not believe I would just leave her like that. She was my everything. For now I would have to do as Aro instructed. I couldn't risk her coming to any harm, and I certainly didn't want her brought here.

Aro breezed back into the room some time later, holding a piece of paper in his hand; a smug look on his face. He placed the papers in front of me and I read it. He watched me intently and when I got to the bottom, he spoke. "Well? Do you think that she'll believe that message? I also have one for your family, too. I can't have anyone sniffing around looking for you. Not of course, that they would find you; I am far too clever for that."

He motioned to James, who stepped forward lifting a small recording device to my mouth, and I spoke into it. "Bella, sorry it's been hard for me to speak to you. I know that I've broken your heart, but please believe that I mean what I said in the letter. We are over, there is no future for us. I'm not in the city. I've gone away to clear my head, to put space between us. Please don't contact me, again. Goodbye."

My voice remained strong throughout the message. I knew that he would not risk letting me leave this live on her cell. How could he guarantee that she wouldn't answer? There was no way that she would allow me to speak and not have her say. I knew that I had to ask, "How's this message supposed to be delivered? I assume that this was just a recording to use at a later date?"

He smiled back at me and said, "That's none of your concern; next message to your parents."

I took a breath reading through what he had prepared, before nodding to indicate I was ready, "Hi Mom, Dad. What can I say other than I'm sorry. I love you, but I can't stay here at the moment. Don't worry about me I'm okay, but I'm not ready to talk to anyone. I'll be in touch soon. Please give me time and space."

I wondered if they'll notice that I had called them Mom and Dad and not my usual greeting of Esme and Carlisle. They might not, but I hoped that things would fall into place for them. Carlisle was an incredibly smart man.

"Okay Cullen, now for your brother and sister, make them convincing."

"Emmett, I'm sorry to leave like this, but I have to get away from her; from my life. I know you're worried. Please don't be. I'm a grown man and this is what I want. I couldn't talk to anyone about it so that's why I just left. Look after Bella, Mom and Alice for me. I'll be in touch soon. Please just leave me in peace, for now."

"Alice, I'm sorry to leave like this but there is no other way. Please don't hate me. Look after Bella for me. She'll need a friend. Don't look for me. I'm not worth it."

When I finished the last recording, I glanced at Aro, his expression was one of deep thought then he levelled his gaze, staring at me for what felt like hours; in reality it was minutes, if that, he clapped his hands together slowly as he spoke. "Bravo! The Oscar for best male performance goes to, Edward Cullen. I'll use these when the need arises. I may require more from you, but for now you may return to your accommodation. James, see to it that Mr. Cullen is presentable and ready to be transported to the venue at 21.00 hours sharp. Tonight, you'll see what I have in store for you."

With that he left. I was pulled to my feet by James and led back toward my cell when suddenly, we took a detour; fear spiked within me. James was taking me somewhere new, this could not be good. There was no-one else around, either, to stop him.

We entered a large room. To my relief, I saw that this was a bathroom with a shower. _God, it looked like heaven to me._

I was allowed to shower, although the water was cold, but least I felt slightly more human before being led back to my cell.

Once back inside, I noticed that there were fresh clothes on the bed. My heart sank when I picked them up. Instantly recognized them. These were mine from the apartment. How had they managed to get hold of them? Then I remembered, he knew where I lived; he already had my cell phone, so wallet and keys would also be in his possession.

A chill ran through me as I thought of Bella being there when they went inside. Then one of the voice-mail messages made sense. Bella said something about me sneaking in and taking my stuff. I heard the softly spoken voice of Laurent from behind me, he was leaning against the door and confirmed to me, "These are your things from your apartment. Don't worry, Bella wasn't inside when they were obtained. We made sure of that."

I was relieved to know that and said, "Thank you. I couldn't bear it if anything happened to her. Where am I being taken tonight? I'm slightly scared of what's happening here, Laurent, can you help me out?"

A look uncertainty crossed his face before he spoke, "The Boss has an event planned this evening. Don't worry, all will be revealed to you. You must learn to trust me, Edward. I'll ask to be part of the detail that's to escort you there, but please do as you are told. The others won't think twice about harming you if you disobey. I'll see you later; I suggest you sleep because it will be a long evening." With that he left.

I laid down on the bed, grateful for the fact that I had at least been allowed to shower and had my own clothes to wear.

I still had that damn belt wrapped around my waist, which I wanted rid of. The pain it caused when activated, is like nothing I had ever experienced, and never wanted to again. It was clear to me that this wasn't going to be removed any time soon, so I would have to comply with their instructions.

What was this '_venue'_ that they had talked of, and what exactly did Aro have in store for me? I had no perception of time here; it could be either hours or minutes before I was transported. I closed my eyes and waited.

**Authors Note:**

So… what do we think is going to happen to poor little Edward next?

Thanks for a fab beta job goes to DreamofRob10 who is an angel – KISSES!

If anyone wants to join a group I have set up on Facebook where I will be posting teasers, updates and new plot bunnies as they bite let me know by PM with your FB name – I am Loopy Lou (look for Red Fraggle) and I will add you in.

Please do leave me some love and let me know what your thoughts on this.


	13. Tonight's The Night

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or any of these characters. No copyright infringement is intended.**

Sleep evaded me as I waited to be collected; to be taken who knew where. My mind was constantly replaying what Aro made me do, record messages for Bella, and my family, telling them that this was what I wanted. As if I could bear to be parted from her, how could she not know that? The longest that we've been apart was after I came home from Heidi's bed. I feared then that she had left me for good and I remember all too well the aching chasm that her absence left inside of me. I hoped that she wasn't suffering to the same degree from my absence now. It hurt me so much not being able to get in touch with her; to know that she was ignoring me and there was nothing that I could do. She must be feeling the same now.

I wished that there was a magic pill for me to take, for me to stop my mind from racing while allowing me to function. At least on some basic level to get through this. Hell, they pumped me full of drugs enough times, already and I knew I didn't want to be unconscious, although right now, I would take what I could get. Maybe I should talk to Laurent and see what he could do for me. He claimed to be my only friend in here, so why not test that theory?

Laying staring at the ceiling, I thought of happier times; wondering if I would ever be allowed to hold her in my arms, smell her hair or feel her soft skin under my touch. Then I realized that Laurent's earlier comment was off, _'Maybe a little something from home would bring you some comfort"._

I was on my feet, searching through the pile of clothes that were dumped on the floor. I found what I was searching for; my holy grail.

Hidden in amongst the clothes was one of Bella's t-shirts.

I pressed it to my face, finding my own personal heaven. It was like she was in my arms in this hell hole.

Then I heard a familiar soft chuckle. I, slowly, opened my eyes, seeing Laurent leaning against the wall outside my cell, "I wondered how long it would take you to find it. I risked a lot to take that while I was in your apartment. Please don't let anyone know that you have it."

Looking him in the eye I answered, "I promise this will remain between us. You have no idea how much having this, means to me. I love her so much."

I couldn't continue, my voice began to break. He simply smiled back at me before advising me to hide it from view before he vanished almost into thin air. I knew why a moment later when I heard heavy footsteps, on their way towards us. I quickly hid the t-shirt between the mattress and bed-frame, climbing back on top, feigning sleep as they arrived to collect me.

The door opened slowly and I sat upright on the bed staring into the eyes of four men. Two I knew from previous encounters, were James and Felix. The other two just looked like hired muscle, along for the ride. James sneered at me, "C'mon pretty boy. You know the score by now. Get on your fucking knees, hands straight out in front of you."

I hesitated, once on my knees before putting my hands out, only to be rewarded by yet another of James's trademark backhanders across my face. It stung, catching me where I had been hit previously, sending a fresh spasm of pain through me. I made sure not that I let him see that.

My wrists were quickly cuffed together and I was pulled to my feet. James had his baseball bat in hand. I hadn't noticed it earlier, and I had no doubt in my mind, that he would use it on me, given any further opportunity. The backhander was probably just a warm up in his eyes. I noticed that he had the sack in his hand. I knew instantly that this would be placed over my head, again, which I hated. As we left my cell, making our way through the maze of tunnels, I was disorientated. I was sure that was all part of the plan when we stepped outside.

Fresh air assaulted my nostrils, albeit through the smelly hood. I greedily filled my lungs with the air, swapping it for the cold, stale, damp air of my cell. I stopped for a moment too long as I felt the bat between my shoulder blades, pushing me forward. When I hesitated, again, I felt it full force across my back, sending me pitching forward to the ground. Instinctively, I raised my hands to break my fall, but this was impossible because they were cuffed together.

I fell clumsily, hurting my wrist in the process. I cursed aloud; receiving a swift kick to the ribs as James said coldly, "Get the fuck up, Cullen, before I give you some real injuries to cry about."

He was interrupted by a deep voice that I recognized from our earlier meeting, as Felix, "Touch him again James, and I'll deal with you myself. You know what _The Boss _said, unharmed and uninjured."

I was sure that James wouldn't take Felix on, and I was brought back to my feet before being manhandled into what felt like the back of a van. I heard a couple of the men get in with me, then Laurent spoke, "Please excuse James. He is eager for tonight's events to be underway. He means you no lasting harm. We shall be traveling for a couple of hours. You're to be made comfortable; may I suggest that you rest. _The Boss_ will be less than pleased if you arrive tired; tonight has been planned perfectly. If you need some _'assistance' _to rest I have just the thing here for you."

With that, he removed my hood, shaking a small bottle of pills at me. I couldn't see what they were, but I knew that I would be asking for some later. I declined, knowing that I would need my wits about me for now.

I sat there thinking about Bella, and this relaxed me. The remainder of the journey passed in relative peace. I knew when we arrived at our destination. I could hear James whooping and hollering from the front of the van.

Once again, my world was cast into darkness when the hood went back on. I hated this part, but knew deep down the less I knew about where I was, the better this would be for me in my attempts to gain freedom.

I could hear people and lots of them in whatever building we are now in. Then I heard Felix give orders to my guards, "Take him upstairs. Do it discreetly; keep him the fuck outta sight. _The Boss_will be here shortly and he wants no distractions."

I was man handled up a flight of stairs and it felt cold wherever we were, causing me to shiver. I was eventually pushed to sit down on what felt like a couch. As I sat there, I could hear noises of shouting and loud music in the distance, but I couldn't tell where I was.

Moments later, I heard the door open and close, with footsteps crossing the floor toward me. My heartbeat started to quicken when the person stopped in front of me. The hood was removed. When my eyes finally focused, I found Aro beaming at me as he greeted me, "Mr. Cullen, so glad that you chose to join me. I'm sure that tonight will be a revelation for you."

I couldn't resist saying, "Well my date bailed so my options were kinda limited."

He brought his hand up in the air and I flinched, ready to be struck again. To my surprise he noticed my reflex reaction and looked concerned, examining my face before saying, "Who the fuck struck you? I'll have no-one injure my guest unless _**I**_give the order!"

He was furious. I debated telling him it was James; letting him meet his punishment, but that would mean every time I was alone with James, I would be wondering what revenge he was planning, so I lied.

This seems to be getting easier every time I do it, "I don't know, I was in the hood; I didn't see."

He looked intently into my eyes, searching to find an answer there, "Never mind. When I find out, I'll punish them. Now, I know that you must be wondering why I've brought you here, and I intend to show you. Follow me."

I managed to get up off the couch, following him out of the room. It appeared we were in a large industrial warehouse.

When we reached our final destination, I found that Felix was already standing guard. We were overlooking a large, open space, where there must been nearly a hundred people gathered around, leaving a gap in the center, roughly in the shape of a circle.

I saw two men walk into the center of the void. I heard a loud noise that sounded like an air horn. I watched wide eyed in horror, as they started to fight each other. This was no boxing match. It was harsh and brutal with no apparent rules or regard. The aim seemed to be to beat the crap out of each other.

I continued to watch as they beat each other, nearly to a bloody pulp, before one man managed to get the other knocked to the ground. It looked like he was going to rip his head off his shoulders before the horn went again. The crowd erupted in cheers, while the apparent winner celebrated with the crowd.

Aro clapped his hands, excitedly, at my side and said to Felix, "I knew that he would come good. How much did I make on that fight?"

Felix talked into a microphone on his lapel. When the news comes back into his ear, he passed the information immediately to Aro, "$10,000 master. The money was going against him winning."

This seemed to please Aro as he said, "That was only the warm up act, and the night is still oh, so young."

As we watched from our vantage point above the crowd, I noticed that money was changing hands as bets were being placed. How could people bring themselves to bet on one man beating the crap out of one another? That seemed so barbaric to me and a look of disgust crossed my face, as Aro commented, "Please do not show distain for this until you've tried it. Trust me, you _will_ be trying it, and you might actually like it."

He didn't wait to see my reaction before he walked over to Felix and whispered something into his ear. Felix simply responded with a nod; smiling. I stood there, slack jawed, staring after him. What did he mean I might enjoy it? There was no way I would fight anyone like that. Yes, I have a temper on me, but it was never used for such brutally violent acts. I wouldn't hesitate to protect myself or Bella if needed, but to fight for fun like this seemed wrong.

Aro drew me toward him with a beckoning finger, as we stood at the edge of the balcony, overlooking the fight area. People were acknowledging Aro's presence, then I realized that he must have been behind all this.

It would sure explain the hired muscle at the place I was being held.

As I stood trying to make sense of what I was seeing and what Aro had just said, another couple of fights came and went. My reverie was broken by Aro clapping excitedly like a child, again as the final fight of the night was announced. People flocked to place bets and I wondered who was involved to garner such interest.

Aro turned to me and in a soft, gentle voice whispered, "Come Mr. Cullen, come and see my prize fighter in action. Maybe one day you will be as good as him. I do believe that you have a raw talent like I saw in him."

As I stood next to Aro, I realized that James was in the center of the makeshift ring. He stood tall and proud with his chest bare, wearing only a pair of jeans his dirty blond hair pulled back in a ponytail at the nape of his neck. His opponent joined him. James bowed down to Aro, who simply nodded in return, signaling his agreement, then the fight started.

I knew from my run in's with James and Laurent's dark warning, that he was brutal and capable of anything, but seeing him fight was another thing all together. His opponent was similar in height, but not build. He was skinny whereas James had strong muscle definition and tone. He reminded me so much of Emmett in the way his looks hide his strength.

Many punches are exchanged. It was difficult at times to tell who is winning. They seemed to be matching each other blow for blow. The fight seemed evenly matched to me, but then again, what would I know.

They were _'dancing' _around each other, both waiting for the other to make that _one _wrong move that would end it. The man he was fighting, suddenly attempted to kick James in the face, but James caught his foot with both hands. The look of shock on his face was apparent, causing James to give him a sadistic grin.

James twisted his leg around, catapulting his opponent, landing him face down on the concrete floor. Once he had him down, James leaped on him, punching him in the face until Aro raised his hand. Two muscle men appeared out of the crowd, pulling James off him.

The man didn't move. I was sure that he was dead and my heart went into my mouth at the thought.

Slowly, he managed to turn himself onto his back. I could see the mess that James has made of his face and I felt sick. He looked like he had wrestled with a wild animal and lost. There was so much blood. Aro seemed pleased, however and Felix soon joined him to survey the damage that James had readily inflicted.

Aro turned to me and with that sinister grin that sent shivers down my spine, saying, "So, what do you think of my little fight nights then?"

I struggled for what to say back to him. Should I tell him the truth or just lie?

"Come on, Mr. Cullen, please do enlighten me with your views and please be truthful. You of all people know how much damage lies can cause."

He smirked and I heard Felix stifle a laugh at that last comment. Anger started to rise inside me. If he wanted the truth, then he would have it, "I think that you're one sick sadistic bastard. As for what goes on down there, they're a bunch of deluded assholes that obviously don't have the brains they were born with to do that to each other. Either that or they've beaten them clean outta their heads!"

Aro stood, looking shocked at my outburst, before he managed to say, "You will fight, Cullen. Make no doubt about it. I'll have recompense for your violation of _my_ property. You think that I was just going to abduct you, put the frighteners on you, and let you go free? You're severely deluded my friend. The men that come here to fight do so for their own reasons. Some for honor, some have scores to settle, some for fun, and others just for the money. You _will_ fight here and where ever else I see fit until you have fulfilled two of those four. I'm sure I don't need to tell you which two I have in mind for you."

He laughed in my face before turning his back on me to walk away. For a split second, I forgot where I was; that the man mountain, Felix, was right behind me. I launched myself at his retreating form, not sure what damage I could inflict, even though I was still handcuffed, but I didn't care, "You fucking bastard! I'm gonna kill you for this!"

Suddenly I was in immense pain, before I realized he must've activated that fucking belt, again. He stopped in his tracks as I fell to my knees, screaming in pain. As the pain showed no sign of abating, I found myself rolling on the ground, trying to get some relief from the relentless pain. It was unbearable as it washed through my entire body. My jaw was clenching so tightly, it felt sore, just like I had been punched, again. There was no way that I could reach around myself to give any comfort to my own body with these cuffs on as I contorted in pain.

Just as quickly as it started, the pain stopped only for a brief second. I was then in a different type of pain.

Felix stood over me, grabbing me by the handcuffs. He punched me squarely in the jaw._ Shit! That_ _motherfucker hurt. _I could feel blood filling my mouth. On a reflex, I started to laugh, only to be given more of the same. This type of pain I could deal with. It was real; inflicted by a person and not a fucking gadget. I realized that the fists stopped and I could see Felix's face leering at me through my half closed eyes. I spat out the blood that had pooled in my mouth right at him.

Unceremoniously, he dropped my cuffs and I fell to the ground where I received a sharp kick in the ribs.

Hearing another voice, I registered that James had come to join the party. I heard him say, "I want some of this action."

I instinctively, pulled myself into the fetal position; afraid that more blows would be rained down on me for my further insolence. I had been warned before, but I didn't care right now.

Only to hear Aro bark a one word order, "_Enough!"_

They both retreated; his words had cut through the air like a hot knife through butter. I started to chuckle; not knowing what else to do. _Is this where it will all end for me?_ Maybe dying in this desolate, empty warehouse would set me free.

Aro broke the silence, "I want this one broken like a wild horse would be. I don't care how you do it Felix, but he _will_ learn to obey and show me some fucking respect or I will have his head!"

Felix mumbled back a response, but I couldn't hear. Aro turned his full attention to me, "I will break you, Cullen. You will learn to do exactly as I tell you. I have warned you before, and yet you continue to try my patience time after time. What is it going to take for you to realize that I am not a man to be messed with? Do I have to hurt you physically? Maybe I should think about harming someone that you love and hold dear to you. There are many options - Carlisle, Esme, Emmett, Rosalie, Alice and then of course there is Isabella. It would be so easy for me to slip into your apartment at night, pay her a little visit. What do you think? Alternatively, maybe when your sister's little doctor boyfriend leaves her for a night shift, she might like a visit from one of my men here. Do you think that I'll not carry out my threats? Only the first time we met, I did tell you I would do this, and yet you continue to defy me. Make no mistake, I _will _get what I want . . . I always do."

He began to pace up and down in front of me, before he spoke further, "Take this piece of fucking shit back to Volterra. I don't want him in my sight any longer. Do what you have to do to keep him silent and obedient. He's given me a headache. I have special arrangements to take care of."

With that, Aro swept away from us, but not before I had my say, "I _will_ get out of here and then I am gonna come after you, motherfucker!"

I screamed as James and Felix grabbed me. I felt a knee press into my back and I knew what was coming next. I wasn't disappointed when the sharpness of the needle punched through my skin, causing me to wince. But, it was nothing compared to the pain in my jaw, around my eye and in my ribs.

Then the world went fuzzy before finally fading once more into a welcome black hole where thinking and dreaming were banished.

**Authors Note:**

So, today 21st May 2012 marks a year since I first posted this story, and it's been one hell of a journey. I have made major changes and put it on hiatus to have it beta'd, lost that person and a load of months before I found the wonderful and amazing DreamofRob10 who is an angel for taking this on! I know a lot of you are new to my story and I must thank each and every one of you for sticking with me on this. I hope that you will not be disappointed with it. This story is my baby and I love it, and I really hope that you do too. It is thanks to Mamasutra that I had to nerve to post and I thank her for her support.

If anyone wants to join a group I have set up on Facebook where I will be posting teasers, updates and new plot bunnies as they bite let me know by PM with your FB name – I am Loopy Lou (look for Red Fraggle) and I will add you in, or look for Fraggle Rock Fics.

Anyway that's enough of my ramblings. Please do leave me your thoughts below!

Lou x x


	14. Meetings & Lies

**DISCLAIMER: I OWN NOTHING AND NO COPYRIGHT INFRINGEMENT IS INTENDED**

Yet again, I woke feeling like I had done several rounds with a truck. My throat felt like I gargled with razorblades; my arms feeling like lead. I tried to sit up, but my energy was completely lacking, plus my ribs hurt too much to try, again.

I sifted through my jumbled memories, to try to work out what was happening and how I had ended up back here in my cell. The last memory I had, although hazy at the moment, was not of being here. My jaw ached, rubbing it with my hand, it felt like I had been punched and I couldn't see clearly out of one eye.

I couldn't remember, clearly, what happened to me. If only I could remember, it would surely shed some light on the injuries that I was sporting now. There was, also, a different type of pain on my spine. It was as if my skin had been scratched away. It itched and I reached around to touch it. It had some kind of dressing on it. I knew I couldn't see it, so there was no point in trying to remove the dressing. It had obviously been taken care of. My eyes wouldn't stay open and in great discomfort, I slipped back into the welcoming darkness.

When I woke again, I found myself sitting upright, gasping for breath. I had been dreaming. No, scrub that, it was a nightmare or was it a memory? Panic ripped through me when I remembered my nightmare. Aro sneering at me, making threats against my family and my Bella. He was saying how easy it would be to get into our apartment at night. The thought made me shudder even though he had already sent his minions to collect my clothes.

If my stomach had anything in it, I was sure I would bring it back up about now.

Sitting on the bed, head in my hands, I was trying to separate truth from my imagination, but the lines were too blurred for me to make any real sense of anything. My hand went down to my ribs because they ached like a bitch. My breathing hitched at the immense pain from me touching them.

Then it came back to me, all of it. The warehouse, the fighting and Aro telling me that _I_ would be joining in. I had foolishly fought back and that fucking belt had been my undoing. There was no way to remove it. Trust me, I had already checked. He was more than capable of dishing out punishment when needed.

My mind flickered back to Felix, and the look of pleasure on his face as he punched me over and over again, before kicking me in the ribs. He was a mountain of a man and was bound to cause damage. The strength he displayed, was immense. I got the feeling, however, that he was holding back. Then that fucker James, arrived, wanting to join the party, where I was the piñata, only to be put back on his leash by Aro.

I had no doubt that I was way in over my newly, shorn head, on this one. There wasn't going to be an easy way out; no quick fix. The mess I was in now, was one entirely of my own making. Aro's parting comment wouldn't leave my head. He'd said something about making special arrangements. He had a glint in his eye when he said this and I swear that he was referring to Bella. Maybe I was being paranoid; I hoped to fuck that I was because, if anything were to happen to her, I would kill myself.

I laid back on the bed. I knew that someone would be down to see me soon. Hoping it would be Laurent, I waited, as if there was any other option. I thought darkly to myself.

I laid there drifting in and out of sleep for what felt like hours before anyone came near me. Eventually, I heard the footsteps approaching and I sat upright ready to face them. When they appeared, I was relieved to see that in fact, it was Laurent. He had food with him. A bottle of water, and a small plastic bag in his hand. He wasn't alone. There was another man with him, one that I didn't recognize. _Oh well, at least it wasn't James coming to see me._

When the cell door opened and Laurent stepped inside, the door locked behind him, leaving his companion to stand guard outside.

"Wow, you must really trust me Laurent, to step in here alone."

"Edward, Edward. As much as I do trust you, I have my safeguard in place. Alex has the controller for your belt, so if you try anything, well ... you know what will happen to you."

Shit, they really did think of everything around here. Not that I would want to harm Laurent. He had never done me any harm. He was the only person around here that I felt I could trust on any level.

Laurent stood over me, taking hold of my head, tilting it from side to side, examining the damage that Felix's fists had inflicted on me.

He told me to lift my shirt, which I did. He began to touch my tender flesh, his sharp intake of breath mirrored my own. Every time his fingers touched another part of my flesh, pain flashed through me. I had to know so hesitantly I asked, "How bad is it?"

He stared deep into my eyes for a while before answering, "I have seen worse. We kept you sedated for a couple of days for your own safety. You needed time to heal. You were very lucky. Felix could quite easily have cracked your ribs like twigs. You have bruising only, I think, which will heal in time. Breathing maybe slightly uncomfortable, short term. I can see if you're allowed something for the pain and I have an ointment that will help with the bruising. Let me go ask. I'm sure _The Boss_wouldn't want to see you in pain like this ... not yet anyway."

Before I could speak, he was gone. I wasn't surprised to hear that they had kept me out of it. They seemed to treat me like an object at times. What did he mean by _'not yet anyway'_? Why did this man seem to be my friend, but only speak in riddles?

Laying back down, I could feel the pain from the bruises on my ribs. I could only pray that Laurent was allowed to bring me something to ease my pain. Not that I deserved to have any relief , but this was nothing compared to what I had inflicted on my beautiful Bella.

Firstly by having sex with Heidi and then lying about it. Clearly, it was the reason I was here. I continued to wallow in self-pity until Laurent returned. He had a smile on his face and a bottle in hand. I sat up a little too quickly and felt dizzy. I really should eat something. Laurent caught my reaction and said, "You need to eat before I allow you to take these tablets. You're very lucky,_Boss_was in an exceptionally good mood today and allowed my request ... Now eat."

He stood there watching as I demolished the food, before he handed me a couple of white tablets that I took them without question. Right now, I didn't care what they were, I just wanted some relief.

Handing me the ointment, he said, "I'm permitted to leave this here because you can't do any harm with it. This will help bring out the bruising quickly. You'll probably need more of this in the coming weeks, so I'll ensure that I get some more. Now, I need you to remove your shirt, again, so I can tend to your tattoo."

He suddenly had my full attention, "My _what_?"

"Tattoo, Edward. The one at the base of your neck. Can you not feel it? It needs to have the dressing removed, cleaned and ointment applied. You need to look after it otherwise it may become infected."

"Back up a fucking minute. You said _tattoo? _I don't have any tattoos!" I found myself on my feet, directly in front of Laurent. He recognized that I wasn't real threat and gestured to Alex that he was okay, and he could stay where he was.

"Ah, well you do now, Edward. You're a Volturi, now, and you're marked by _The Boss _as his property." He pushed me to sit back down. I knew if I resisted, I would be punished.

Laurent gently removed the dressing from the base of my neck, applying ointment before declaring that his work was done. However, I couldn't let him leave now, once again, he was speaking in veiled comments. I needed to know more, "Laurent, I trust you, but I need to know what exactly is going to happen to me. Why the fuck are you telling me that I am now _'marked'?_ Who did this to me, and why?" He broke me off, pulling up his own shirt to reveal a Gothic styled _V _adoring his back.

He turned back to me saying, "This is the mark of the Volturi. You wear it now as we all do."

I didn't think I took in what he had said immediately. I continued with my frantic questioning. "Aro keeps making all these comments, and I don't understand what he wants from me. He has never been very clear about it. That fight last night … he said something about me enjoying it. What did he mean Laurent? Please!"

Laurent looked at me, obviously thinking about what he can, and can not say. Finally, he broke the silence that hung between us, "I can't say anything to you. As much as I want to, I value my life too much to go against his wishes. He'll reveal all to you when he feels the time is right. For now, I suggest that you rest, you have a busy few days ahead of you. I'll bring you more pain relief if you need it, but for now, I have other matters to attend to."

With that, he left.

Shit, first I lost my hair, now, I had a shiny new tattoo. Bella was gonna freak when she found out; if I ever make it home to her.

Again, I was left to my own thoughts and they were truly racing. Laurent's comment about wearing the mark of the _Volturi_ began to sink in. I had been marked as if I was piece of property. The only time they could've done this was after we left the warehouse; when I was unconscious because there was no way in hell I would've been willing. Laurent said that they all wore it. Shit, Aro was sicker than I realized.

I must've fallen asleep again when I was woken by the door to my cell being opened and Felix stepped inside.

"Come with me Cullen. No messing around, I'm not in the mood for games." The tone of his voice brooked no argument and I knew that I would be squashed like a fly by this man mountain.

I held my hands out, automatically, so he could put on the, now familiar, handcuffs and he sneered, "You know your place … that's good."

He then produced something new; a leather belt was put around my waist. This had restraints built into the side. I assumed that this was easier for him to control me. He grabbed my arm roughly, leading me through the maze of tunnels and we arrived in a large room. It looked a bit like a gym, but not one that I was used to seeing. This was for want of a better description, basic; the equipment more suited to a boxing club with a couple of large punch bags suspended from the ceiling and a boxing ring in the center of the room. There were some pieces of equipment that I recognized from a more traditional gym.

There in the center of the boxing ring, I saw him and a chill ran through my body … Aro.

Felix pushed me forward toward him, forcing me to my knees. I saw James leaning up against a wall, not really paying me any attention. Aro acknowledged our arrival by beginning to speak, "Mr. Cullen, I trust that you're now well rested, following our night out, and have had time to think about our arrangement."

I opened my mouth to speak only to have Felix nudge me in the back, silencing me immediately,  
>"As I have shown you, men come to fight for many different reasons. Your reason will be to either win or lose whatever I command. This will earn me money as people will bet for or against you. This will be a way for you to repay the debt that you owe me. As I have told you on previous meetings, you're very lucky to be alive given the gravity of the dishonor that you have bestowed upon me. She is paying her debt to me back, and now it is your turn. Felix here, will be in charge of your training; you'll take any direction that he gives you without question or the consequences will be severe. I trust that you understand the gravity of your situation?"<p>

He looked at me as if expecting an answer. The only word that came from my lips was, "Bella."

His face lit up at the mention of her name and instantly I regretted it. I couldn't take back what I said and he spoke again, "Ah, Isabella. Now she certainly is a charming young woman and seemingly very upset with you. I had the pleasure of meeting with her last night while you were otherwise occupied. May I say that she is even more beautiful in the flesh?"

He paused on purpose, gauging my reaction to his words. I tried my hardest to give nothing away. He climbed down from the ring and began pacing the floor in front of me, "To see such a beautiful young lady drinking alone in a bar, broke my heart. So, I kept her company. Well, after all she was there thinking you were going to turn up and explain why you left her. She was so disappointed when you didn't show considering the arrangement you made with her." He let out a menacing chuckle, "Oh no, that would have been me and not you that made those plans. How remiss of me." He chuckled to himself, again and I remained calm, somehow, "She waited and waited in that bar for you to show, and the poor thing did attract some rather unwanted attention from a male admirer."

He turned towards James, who simply smiled at me before saying, "She really is a hot piece of ass ... feisty too. I wouldn't mind getting me some of that action."

I couldn't hold my tongue any longer. The thought of James even breathing near my beautiful Bella, made me feel physically sick, "You keep your fucking filthy hands off her, or I will kill you!"

Quick as a flash, James was in front of me, my face in his hand, squeezing my jaw, which was still painful, but I couldn't let him see that, "You and who's fucking army, Cullen? You're not in any position to threaten me are you?"

He sneered right into my face so close that I could feel his breath, before the back of his hand made contact with my jaw and once again, pain coursed through me. I simply gritted my teeth and rode out the pain. Aro was furious; his eyes flashed with anger as he shouted, "James! I will not tell you again."

James bowed to Aro and said, "Sorry, I forgot my place."

His control regained and Aro continued, "Well, of course I couldn't allow her to be sullied by anyone like him, so I was the perfect gentleman and protected her honor. She was, of course, very grateful to me. In fact, she couldn't wait to show me exactly how grateful she was once we made our way back to my penthouse. You remember my penthouse don't you Edward? After all, that was where you fucked Heidi." He evilly chuckled, "Well Isabella was very impressed; I didn't have the heart to tell her what had happened there previously. She has the most beautiful soft skin. From her outward appearance, I wouldn't have expected her to have a tattoo in such an intimate place. Let's just say that, she certainly wasn't left wanting in anyway, or even thinking about you. I do believe that once in the penthouse, your name didn't pass her lips, once. She's definitely interesting when she sleeps, with that cute habit where she talks in her sleep, well more mumbles in her sleep. Even then, you were no longer a thought in her mind. You're no longer of any importance to her. She doesn't care where you are, or what you are doing. She truly believes that you've abandoned her."

My heart broke yet again into a million different pieces, but I couldn't let him see that. He stood there before, me telling me that Bella no longer cared where I was. She proved that by spending the night with Aro in his penthouse. I couldn't say that I could I hold that against her. I had fucked Heidi while I was still with Bella. She believed that I had left her when she met Aro, so she was in her eyes, single.

Damn. I was only with Heidi because I thought Bella was leaving me for another man. That wasn't my fault, either. I still couldn't find any reason in my heart to blame her for her choice. It was my fate to lose her. I just wished it were to anyone other than him. I was trapped here; she was moving on with her life, forgetting about me. I was disappointed she hadn't found my hidden message in the letter. She had probable crumpled it up and thrown it in the trash by now. After the way she thought that I had behaved towards her, I wouldn't blame her, one bit.

I was resigned to my fate, to stay here and carry out Aro's bidding. He had taken my freedom, and now he had taken my reason to fight ... to escape. He had taken Bella away from me.

Felix pulled me roughly to my feet. I realized, that while I had been spaced out and blotting out the urge to break down, Aro left the room. James however, remained, silently observing from the side lines. He freed my hands from the restraints and said to me, "Now, I train you to fight. You will do as I say, when I say. You disobey me and you really don't know what pain I will inflict on you. Do you understand?"

Without even thinking I could only utter a single word, "Yes."

Then, my training began. Felix was a hard taskmaster, despite the fact that my ribs were still painful, I worked through it; letting it remind me that I was still alive. Yet, this was nothing compared to the pain my heart felt. It continued to rip itself apart in my chest. Nothing, I had ever felt in my life, compared to that. With anything and everything paling into insignificance in comparison, I felt dead inside.

Once the session was over, I was escorted back to my cell. I waited until I was sure I was alone and then, and only then, did I fall apart. I brought out the t-shirt I had hidden earlier, desperately clutching it to my chest. I inhaled her scent, tears rolling freely down my cheeks, sobs wracked my aching chest as I realized ... I had lost her. I had gone from having everything to having nothing and it was all my own doing.

**Authors Notes:**

Thanks for reading and please do leave me a review. When I wrote this I just could not imagine Edward/Rob with a shaved head, and then BAM he went and did it, and OMG the results were amazing, he was even more attractive than I could've thought.

A world of thanks as always to my fabulous beta, DreamofRob10. Please do check out her stories, she has been an absolute godsend to me and I cannot thank her enough.

There is more to come on this, Steph has it all in hand and there is also Bella's POV which I will be starting to post soon too.

I must also thank Mamasutra for encouraging me to write and then post this when I first wrote it last year. Thanks and until next time


	15. Training Day

**Disclaimer: I of course do NOT own Twilight or any of these characters. No copyright infringement is intended.**

Laurent came in to bring me food. I said nothing to him as he lingered. Obviously waiting for me to make some form of conversation with him, I didn't. I deserved to be here; I had betrayed Bella, and I didn't blame her for going out and enjoying herself, forgetting all about me. After all, that's what I told her to do, forget me and move on.

I ached from head to toe. Where my heart once beat with love, it now only beat to pump blood through my body. It served its purpose, rather like me. The purpose for me being here was perfectly clear to me. I had to make Aro money; make amends for my wrong doing; make him money as compensation. It was all because I couldn't keep my stupid, petty jealously under any form on control.

I laid on my bed with Bella's t-shirt against my cheek. I knew that soon her scent would be gone. I would have to rely on my memories, they soon would be all I had left of her. They would have to get me through. I knew I was keeping her and my family safe by complying with Aro's wishes and while I remain here, and I did as he asked, he wouldn't harm them.

I felt sick at the thought of him breathing the same air as her, let alone talking to or touching her, but from what he said earlier, he had done far more than that. He had sex with her, he had seen her naked, he had to have. There was no other way he could've known about the tattoo, or the fact that she mumbles in her sleep. There was nothing that I could do though. I could imagine Aro being charming to someone he wasn't ready to kill. And in a moment of weakness and feeling that I had walked out and abandoned her, I could see why Bella would be taken in by him.

Something James said refused to leave me. Had he seen her? Talked to her? I would rip him apart with my bare hands if he had. I guessed I would never know; maybe it was best that way.

I laid there staring into space not knowing what day or even time it was. The days melted into one, and let's face it, I had spent a lot of time knocked out with whatever drug it was they pumped into me when I stepped out of line, or needed to be restrained. I had to keep my wits about me, to show that I could be trusted to do as they wanted. I was sure that someone out there wouldn't believe the lie I had been forced to tell. I had hoped Bella would catch on to my hints, but my hopes were fading, fast.

I needed to rest; I was physically and mentally exhausted, and so I closed my eyes.

I was woken by the door to my cell being flung open and James standing in the doorway, leering at me. Oh, how I longed to punch him in the face, to wipe that smug grin clean away, but I knew, having seen him fight, he was lethal. Any attempt at this stage would be futile. No, I would have to bide my time, build my strength, then take him out when he least expected it.

I got down on my knees, head bowed, and hands straight out in front of me to be cuffed together. He laughed at my compliance. Obviously, he wanted me to put up a fight, and I wouldn't give him the satisfaction. It was better to obey then to fight back ... for now.

When we reached the gym, I was put to work. Today my workout consisted of running on a treadmill. It was difficult when your hands were kept cuffed together and you were being watched by a lunatic with a baseball bat, but I managed it.

"Thirty minutes ,Cullen, then you can have some water. Maybe I will allow you to eat," James sneered.

He paced around the room and I managed to block him out, pretending he wasn't there. Once the program finished, he directed me to some other equipment that was designed to build upper body strength. I had always considered myself to be in shape; occasionally joining Emmett in the gym, but I was nowhere near his level. The workout was grueling and I was only allowed minimal amounts of water, despite the fact that I was hungry and fatigue was setting in. I knew this was James' way of being sadistic, so I wouldn't complain to him.

I was put back on the treadmill, only this time, the speed was faster and there was no timer set. James just waved it off and went to work out himself. I felt my exhaustion wash over me in waves and my legs started to feel like jello, but I couldn't, and would not, give in.

I had to see this through. I couldn't let them win.

I struggled for breath; sweat dripped off me and I was unsure how much longer I would be able to continue to run for. My legs almost went from under me, but I managed to right myself before I stumbled, only to continue for a couple more minutes before I felt dizzy and collapsed.

I heard two voices before I felt someone slapping my face trying to bring me round. Cold water was poured over my face causing me to gasp and try to sit up.

"Stay down. You took a nasty fall there." It was Felix. I could tell by the tone and tenor of his voice that he is mad. I hoped he wouldn't take this out on me too heavily. I had done everything that was asked of me.

He handed me a bottle of water, which I drank greedily. I could sense Felix's anger as he confronted James, "You're a fucking idiot. Did you give him anything to eat before he started his workout this morning?"

"Oh Felix, you know, I don't think I did. How stupid of me." There was a slight laugh to James' response and condescending tone. This was short lived as Felix appeared to be pretty pissed and spun to face him, pushing him back against the wall, "You fucking idiot! You know _The boss _wants him taking care of properly. You also know how important it is to be ready for such a workout. Go and get him some fucking food and something to drink. **NOW!**" Felix released James who fled the room muttering something under his breath.

Felix turned to face me and I flinched automatically. "Mr. Cullen, all I can do is apologize for his lack of care towards you. We've all been given strict instructions where you are concerned. You're to not to train in the future without having eaten and you're to have fluids available to you at all times. I know how hard these sessions can be when you're not used to them. Trust me, this **will**not happen again."

I only nodded as he watched me closely. I assumed he was only making sure I didn't pass out, protecting his bosses latest moneymaker.

James re-entered the room with a plate of food and some energy drinks that he thrust at me. I looked at him warily before I devoured the food. Felix decided that I needed to rest, so he took me back to my cell himself. We didn't speak the whole way there.

Once I was inside, the door was locked behind me. I breathed a sigh of relief, thinking that earlier I would have been punished for falling, but now, I saw that the failure was on James' part and I was sure he would be punished. That thought gave me some comfort, at least.

I took the rare time that I had been afforded to try to rest, although every part of my body ached. I knew the training would only get worse, so I needed to rest when possible. Felix said there would another session later. Great!

My mind was racing ... how many of these fights would I be forced to participate in before they thought about letting me go? Will they really let me go? What if Aro decided he wanted to keep me here permanently? I would rather die than let that happen. If I couldn't have the freedom, I needed to have a backup plan; I needed to form this quickly. At the moment, the only way out of here would be for me to be dead. I would rather not view that as my only option. Maybe Laurent was someone I could get on my side, but I needed to be sure that he wouldn't tip anyone off about my plan.

How was I going to do this? I shook my head ... I had no idea. This could all go horribly wrong and if it did, I had no doubt that I would never, ever see Bella or my family again. They would kill me. I knew that my body would never be found, either. People would think that I had just vanished. Would they just believe the lie? I hoped if that happened, someone would find it in their hearts to let my family know. The thought of them searching for me, never giving up hope gave me chills. I knew I deserved to be punished; I had done wrong, but my family and Bella didn't deserve to be hurt. They were the innocent bystanders, thanks to one crazy, foolish night that I would regret for the rest of my life, however long that may be.

My eyes slowly closed and I drifted into the waiting darkness.

James came to collect me from my cell and lead me roughly to a cavernous room near my cell. Upon entering, I saw Bella stood with Aro and my heart sank to my shoes. His arm was curled around her slender waist, like a snake curling around it's prey, she stared at him with what looked like love in her eyes. She clung to him as if he was the most important thing in the world to her.

She used to look and act like that around me.

I walked over to her, reaching out a hand, but when I got within touching distance, she moved her gaze, but the look that she gave me was one of pure scorn. She reached up on her tip toes and whispered something into Aro's ear. He kissed her forehead and laughed wildly before his eyes settled on me. A hard look appeared in his eye and his free hand raised and before I knew what was happening, I was being forced to my knees before them.

My arms were pulled hard behind my back. I looked up at him, seeing that pulled Bella into a passionate kiss. He had his hands on her skin and I struggled fruitlessly to free myself. His henchmen were too strong for me.

Aro broke the embrace, his eyes met mine and didn't leave. He extended his hand out and I saw a gun being handed to him. I fought desperately against them; fear spiked within me and my survival instinct kicked in. I needed to be free; to have a fighting chance against him. Deep down I knew it was pointless, but I needed to try.

He smiled at me, and without breaking our eye contact, he handed the gun to Bella. She giggled at his side, taking the gun into her hand, turning it and admiring it. The smile soon faded from her beautiful face as she stepped toward me, kissing me lightly on the forehead. I began to weep, tears falling freely from my eyes as I feared what was to come next. I knew there was no way out of this.

James moved to stand behind her, he placed his hands on her shoulders and whispered something into her ear. I didn't hear what he said, but what shocked me, was the look that crossed her face. He placed a kiss on her cheek, bowed to Aro before he stepped back into the shadows. There wasn't flicker of emotion as she coldly and calmly stared into my eyes as she leveled the gun at my forehead.

I looked at her, my face pleading with her, my voice broke as I attempted to plead for my life, "Bella, baby. Please don't do this! I love you."

She spoke in a low steady voice, "Baby? I am not your baby." She sneered, "I haven't been since you fucked that whore, leaving her with a permanent reminder of your betrayal and deceit. You ruined my life! Now, you will pay with yours."

With that she took a breath; I closed my eyes briefly before I opened them to meet her steely gaze. If she was going to do this, I wouldn't make it easy for her. She would need to look me in the eyes as she took my life away from me.

The last thing that I heard was the sound of the trigger being pulled.

**Authors Note:**

Okay so I have packed a small bag, grabbed my passport and am heading out of the country after that cliffhanger! My poor beta messaged me when she read it and she nearly choked on her fries! WHOOPS! Luckily she is okay, so masses of thanks as always go out to DreamofRob10.

Thanks for reading and sorry if I haven't replied to your review, I do read every one of them!

A little pimping now, my good friend Mason Cullen has written her first fic, and I was the person to introduce her to reading FF and now she is writing, I feel like a proud parent! I am pre-reader and hand holder for her so please do check this out - you know the drill with ( )'s...

(www)fanfictionnet/s/8261538/1/

I am also contributing to a fandom compilation for LLS, and would love to know what you would like to read, Aro's POV from Taken? Bella's POV for Duplicity or Tanya's POV for Karma Killer? The most popular will win, I have a Facebook group if you want to join, Fraggle Rock Fics, and there is a vote in there, or PM me!

Until next time!

Lou x x x


	16. What Goes Around

_**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight and no copyright infringement is intended.**_I woke in a blind panic, sweat dripped from me, my chest physically hurt from the shortness of breath that I was experiencing in that moment. I clutched my chest wishing that the pain would stop; tears began to fall down my face as I realized what the dream symbolized, the end of Bella and I. I knew that this had been my subconscious trying to make sense of the fact that Aro had referred to her being in his bed, that he had laid his hands on her before he finally took her away from me in the most horrendous way. He had fucked her, she had let him. My mind raced, I knew that I couldn't judge her, but it still hurt me. Yes, I had made a grave mistake the night that I refused to believe her when she told me that nothing had happened with Sam, but if I had managed to keep my childish jealousy under control then, well I wouldn't be here now. There wasn't anyone to blame for this mess, except me.

I laid back down and stared at the ceiling, there was no way I would dare close my eyes. I couldn't bear the thought of seeing Bella in that monsters arms, even if it was only in a dream.

It felt like hours passed before I heard the familiar noise of footsteps approaching my cell. I refused to move from my bed. I would take whatever punishment they chose to dole out to me.

The door opened and to my surprise in walked Aro. I had been expecting to see James or Laurent. He didn't come very far into the cell. He remained in the doorway and I could feel his hard stare on me, but I wouldn't return it.

He waited for some time before he spoke, obviously expecting me to submit to him, "Mr. Cullen, why are you trying my patience? You know better than this. I'm not in any mood to play games. You're required to train hard today. I have plans for you, I need you to pay attention and start to repay me. Now," he clapped his hands at me, "get on your feet! James, come and escort Mr. Cullen to training."

He swept majestically out of the room. I watched him out of the corner of my eye as he left. James walked in, grinning from ear to ear. My blood ran cold when I looked up at him. Just seeing him, reminded me of my dream, the fact that Bella could so coolly and callously end my life without so much as a second thought.

I didn't move from my bed, so James marched over and dragged me off it. My legs gave way from under me, as he shouted and a couple of henchmen came into the cell. I didn't have the energy to put up a struggle when they dragged me to my feet and hauled me in front of James.

He grinned at me, tilting his head to one side before sneering, "You just don't fucking learn do you? Don't mess with me, Cullen. You do as I say, when I say it, otherwise, I'll beat the crap outta you. Understand?"

I nodded at him, my head falling down causing my chin to rest on my chest.

James laughed at this; seeing that I'd had the fight and spirit, knocked out of me. I thought that secretly he wished that wasn't the case. The two men holding me up didn't release their hold on me and James walked over, tilting my face up to meet his, his sneering expression still in place. His face was right up in mine and I could smell stale cigarettes on his breath. I remained devoid of any emotion.

That seemed to spur him on, and he spoke to me, again, "Your training will resume Cullen; you will do as you are told. Otherwise, you know the consequences. I'm not just talking about what will happen to you. There's your family to consider and of course, Bella. I'll take care of her personally."

I tried hard not to react to his taunts, but the flash of anger that I felt must've transferred to my eyes. He laughed hard and he stopped just as quickly. A pain radiated through my stomach and I knew that I had been punched … hard. The only thing that stopped me from slumping to the ground was my two chaperones.

A second and third blow came just as quickly. James seemed to think that using me as a punch bag was a good idea.

He motioned to the men and they let me go. I fell to the ground in searing pain, but it was welcoming pain because it stopped me from thinking about Bella and Aro.

He turned on his heels and left me there, prone on the ground grasping my stomach and ribs. As he walked away, I heard him shout before laughing, "No training today for Cullen, he doesn't have the stomach for it."

I laid there on the ground; there seemed no point in moving. There was nowhere for me to go and nothing for me to do other than wallow it my pain and self pity, so wallow, is what I did.

I must have fallen asleep at some point until Laurent brought me back around. He was crouched on the floor next to me, shaking me gently by the shoulder. When my eyes met his, I saw the look of concern, and heard some measure of this in his voice, "Edward, are you okay? You missed training today, I was sent to see where you were. What happened to you? Why are you on the floor?" He motioned to the dirty floor that I was laid on.

I shook my head in response, before getting to my feet and lying to him, "Nothing, I'm fine. I had a slight disagreement with James."

Laurent simply nodded in response, before he spoke, again, "I'll clear this with Felix; you will not be punished for this. He will not be pleased. James shouldn't have punished you. "

He took me out of the cell and back to the gym where I had been previously. Felix was using a punching bag in the corner, landing blow after blow seemingly without pausing at all. As I watched him, I noticed he didn't even break a sweat. I knew how that punch bag felt thanks To James.

Laurent cleared his throat to announce our arrival, and Felix stopped and marched over to us, "Where the fuck has this one been? I was expecting him hours ago?"

"Forgive me. James was due to bring him, it would appear that he got a little… sidetracked." Laurent replied.

I frantically looked between them, Felix nodded before instructing me to get on the treadmill and start running. I did as I was told without question. I would work through the pain; grateful to be able to feel it and not lying dead with a bullet through my brain.

Eventually, Felix came back over to me, putting me to work on the punching bag, instructing me on how to land punches. He told me the best places to hit and get the maximum effect on a man. I would be expected to be in fighting shape within a week because Aro wanted to put me to work and earn money for him.

The pain in my stomach area was becoming unbearable after hours of working out. It was only when Felix told me to take a break that I stopped. He inadvertently made light contact with the area where the pain was centered and it became too much. I sucked in air sharply, before doubling over, grasping my side. Felix was immediately, next to me, grabbing my t-shirt, lifting it. He wasn't happy with what he saw.

When I looked in the mirror, I made out angry darkening marks on my side where James' fists had made contact. No wonder it hurt so much.

Felix dragged me to a chair, pushing me back into it, he growled, "Who the fuck did this to you?"

I shook my head, refusing to say. That didn't please him. When he repeated the question, there was an edge to his voice, "I said, who the fuck did this? _**Tell me!**_"

There wasn't any way that I was going to refuse. Yes, James might have been brutal, but Felix, well he wasn't to be messed with. So, I muttered a one-word answer, "James."

When a loud roar erupted from Felix's throat, it scared me. Laurent and some of the others came charging in to see what the problem was. They were brushed aside when he left the room in a hurry. Their eyes immediately found me as they talked between themselves, clearly thinking the level of shouting that was going on in the room was, aimed at me, that I had done something wrong. I couldn't work out what was being said, so I fell to my knees and put my hands behind my head. I was terrified. They seemed to think that I had caused this reaction in Felix and the next thing that I knew, the pain inflicted by the belt was coursing through me. Thankfully I didn't have far to fall to the ground, where I writhed in agony. The belts pain combined with my injuries from James was too much to bear and I screamed at Laurent to make it stop as my breath caught in my throat and tears streamed down my cheeks.

He waved his hand and the pain subsided. He was on his knees next to me a moment later. I rolled over to my back, gasping for breath, I managed to mutter, "It…it wasn't me; I did nothing wrong. Stop him… James."

The look of recognition on Laurent's face told me that he understood. He barked orders to the others in the room to find Felix, before talking into a walkie talkie. I couldn't focus fully, but he helped me to my feet, to a seat where he brought me a bottle of water. He watched while I caught my breath and waited until I was able to speak fully, "Edward, tell me what happened."

I managed through somewhat labored and painful breaths to say, "James attacked me before. Felix found out, he… he..."

"Hmm... yes. Felix and James have 'history', shall we say. He won't stand for James' heavy handed ways. I pity James, Felix has been looking for any excuse to beat down on him."

He chuckled at the thought; I just wished I knew what had happened to cause the apparent hatred between them.

My thoughts were interrupted by Felix returning, his face showing no emotion, but I noticed he was clenching his fists open and closed then I saw there was blood on them. He had obviously caught up with James, there was no doubt in my mind about who won.

Felix took Laurent off; I couldn't hear what was being said. I could tell by the look on Laurent's face that it was obviously not something that he was pleased to hear. They looked to be arguing with each other.

Felix turned to face me, his control still in place, "Edward, you'll rest for the remainder of the day. Tomorrow you'll resume training; taking James' place in this weekend's gathering because he will be indisposed. You will have three days to train with me, and trust me when I say that I **will** work you harder than you thought possible. Your body will hurt, you will want to scream for me to make it stop. I won't. You will give me everything that you have, and I will still want more from you. Do you understand?"

I managed a small nod in response. He turned and left the room, leaving me speechless. What did he mean by taking James' place this weekend?

I turned to Laurent, who, with a grim look on his face, answered my unspoken question, "James was due to fight this weekend. However, after his meeting with Felix just now, he won't be in any fit state to take part. You're to take his place."

He led me back to my cell. As we walked through the passages, we passed James. He was being practically carried by two other men and covered in blood. He looked to have horrific injuries to his face, and I could only imagine what injuries I couldn't see.

Laurent ushered me past him, once back in my sanctuary, did I dare to ask the question, "So, I'll be fighting this weekend? What will be expected of me?"

Laurent smiled, although it didn't reach his eyes, but his answer was simple, "Just don't get yourself killed, Edward."

With that, he left, leaving me with my thoughts, which by now, were racing. I was expected to fight? I had seen how brutal these fights were and I was terrified. These men were vicious animals. I was nothing like them. I feared that my _run in's_ with James would be a welcome relief compared to what I had witnessed the other night. The thought of stepping into that ring, made my blood run cold in my veins, but I had to do this. For me, for Bella and my family.

Facing the fact that there was no way out of this for me, I knew I had to do what was asked of me. This would be the start of my way to repay Aro's imagined debt, so every fight would be one less, and more importantly, one nearer to the freedom that I so desired. I just had to pray to whoever was listening to me that the freedom didn't involve my death at one of those fights; at the hands of a man that I didn't know, and who didn't care anything about me or my reasons for being there. There really was nothing that I could do other than take whatever orders I was given.

**Authors Note:**  
>Beta'd by the fabulous Dreamofrobten.<p>

Thanks to everyone who has stayed with this since I started this what feels like so long ago. We are now at the end of the original chapters that I had written for this story so I will have to get my thinking cap on, crack those knuckles and see what I can come up with. This story will always have a special place in my heart, and I have changed it by pulling Bella's POV into a different story which I need to start posting, but this will be the one that I am going to concentrate on, as I feel that Edward is the real focus here.

Thank you for all the reviews and I am sorry if I haven't replied to yours.

Finally I have donated an alternate POV from Karma Killer to Fandom for LLS, as FF is awkward about links being posted if you Google Fandom For LLS you will find their page and $5 will get you a fantastic compilation of both Twilight and Hunger Games fics.

Lou x


	17. Fight Night Part One

**Authors Note: Of course I own nothing, and no copyright infringement is intended**

I had no idea how many days it would be before I was to fight. Time had no meaning here. I didn't know what day it was, let alone the time. Hell most of the time, I had no idea if it was day or night. I was sure, however, that they would be keeping me on a schedule as near to normal as possible. I assumed I would be sleeping during the night and worked during the day, but no one said anything. There were no windows, not one I could see any light or a glimpse that the outside world was still there. My eyes grew accustomed to the near darkness of my cell and the fluorescent lights that lit the corridors and gym.

I craved daylight, and fresh air more than I thought possible. I just wanted to be able to breathe it in, to know that there was life beyond this hell hole that I was in. Knowing that soon I would be able to taste the fresh air, was enough for me. Of course that was on the assumption that the fight wouldn't be held here. Aro seemed like a smart man and not one to have this on his own doorstep.

The next two days were filled with endless workouts; long hard training sessions with Felix and hearty meals packed with proteins. I knew that there was a reason for all this; I knew also that it would hurt like hell when I took the inevitable hits in the fight, but I had to prepare the best that I could. If I let Aro down, there was the constant threat hanging over Bella and my family. I wanted to keep them safe. This was my personal hell, not theirs. They had to remain safe no matter what the cost to me personally.

Laurent was the only person that I saw that I felt any kind of bond with, but I knew he was only doing his job. I wasn't sure if he actually felt sorry or any pity for me or if his role was to play good cop to James's bad one. James- I hadn't seen since we passed in the corridor, and from what I saw of his injuries, he would be out of action for a while. I made a mental note that day not to anger Felix.

I was resting in my cell following a particularly hard training session with Felix when Laurent appeared at the door.

"Edward, Master wants to see you. I know I don't have to tell you what to do." He spoke in a soft voice. I nodded and went down on my knees with my hands outstretched. He opened the cell door and fitted my handcuffs as per the routine. Once these were on, I got to my feet and began to walk out of the cell, waiting for instructions on where I needed to go. I heard him say in a low voice. "I'm sorry to do this to you, but I have to." I turned around to see that he was holding a hood in his hands; I felt panic start to rise. I hated that thing, but I bowed my head so he could place it over my head. I allowed him to lead me through the maze of tunnels; I trusted him and knew he wouldn't harm me.

I felt the hard stone floor change once we ascended a flight of steps and I knew from the smells around me, that I was in the main house again, where I had been once before. That was the day that I first met Aro. My blood ran cold at the memories of being in that room; the revelation that this was my life for the foreseeable future.

Once I was where I needed to be, I was pushed to sit in a chair. Now this was definitely different.

My hood was removed and the sunlight that flooded the room, felt like it was burning my eyes. I squeezed them shut and tried my best to shield them with my restrained hands. I opened them slowly, squinting to allow tiny fragments of light to filter through; my poor eyes had become used to the darkness I lived in. I heard a chuckle from across the room and I looked toward the source of the sound, but couldn't see anyone, then again, I couldn't see much.

"Mr. Cullen, how nice to see you, again." Just the sound of his voice sent a shiver through me. I remained quiet, not speaking in response. "So, you must be wondering why I had you brought up here." Through, my now seeing eyes, I made out his gesture to the grand room that served as some kind of office for him. "Well, as you know, due to James' absence, you're to take his place tomorrow night." For the second time, I felt panic rising inside of me. "You will win or lose whichever I decide and I do expect you to take quite a beating from your opponent. He's far more experienced than you at this, and had a score to settle with James. He will not be pleased at the last minute replacement, but I'm sure he will be happy with such an easy win." He shrugged his shoulders. "Or maybe he won't. Who knows?"

My eyes grew wide - easy win? _Shit! Was this guy some kind of machine? _I swallowed nervously making sure I didn't utter a word in response.

"Oh, Mr. Cullen, I'll be keeping you safe. You have a debt to repay and you will not be let off the hook so easily. Please be assured of that. Now, you'll need to listen to everything that Felix tells you tomorrow in your final session, his advice is invaluable."

He turned and walked away from me, staring out of the window. He turned to address Laurent in a bored voice he said. "Remove him; I'll make my decision tomorrow."

The hood was placed back over my head, and I was taken back out of the room. Laurent whispered to me that I needed to remain quiet, so I do. Once we were back downstairs in the damp, dark basement and in my cell, Laurent removed the hood and handcuffs. He stared at me, obviously reading the confusions and questions that I had.

"Edward, remember when Master said that men win and lose at these meetings?" I nodded. "Well, he'll tell you which you're to do tomorrow night. Disobedience isn't an option. If he says lose, you lose. If he says win, then you had better fight your hardest because no one will make it easy for you to win, and you really don't want to upset him."

I swallowed deeply, wondering what exactly would happen to me at this fight. I mean, I had seen these and they were brutal; no holds barred and no care given to the people that took part.

A chill ran through me as I turned to Laurent. "I need to be able to look after myself, to fight. I…I can't do this. I need your help; I can't stay here; I can't fight. Please Laurent."

He looked at me. "I can't help you Edward. No one can. You have to do this. If you don't do this, then well, I don't need to tell you what will happen to you and to Bella. There will be nothing that anyone can do to stop it; he will not be stopped once he has his mind set on something. There isn't a way out of this for you other than to do as you are told. I can't help you escape either, so please don't ask that of me. I would be killed and…" He took on a faraway look, and in that moment, I felt he had people he was protecting or trying to be near, by being here. I would need to ask him about this at some point. "Just know that if I could help you, I would Edward, believe me."

I smile at him. "I know Laurent, and that means more than you can ever know; I trust you. Now there is one favor that I will ask, and I hope you won't refuse me this one."

He cocked his head to the side. "If I can do it, I will."

"Teach me to fight. I need to be able to protect myself. I want to learn; Felix is teaching me, but I need to be able to defend myself if I'm going to survive here. I want to get back to Bella, to be free."

Waiting for him to answer felt like an ages passed. "Okay, but we'll have to start now while Felix is otherwise engaged. I know you'll need every minute to train. Can I trust you to walk un-restrained?"

I nod slowly before I ask the question I'm dreading the answer to. "How long do we have?"

Laurent breathed out. "It's Friday, seven o'clock at night, to be precise. You'll be leaving here tomorrow at about 6PM. We may have to work through the night. You'll need to rest and eat, though. You'll need to preserve some energy for the fight. It'll take more out of you than you realize. Trust me; the nerves will burn your energy like gasoline."

He turned; walking away and I followed him, knowing this will be a hard night I had ahead of me.

When I returned to my cell, I was exhausted, mentally and physically. Laurent was an excellent teacher and opponent. He taught me how to read an opponent's moves and anticipate their actions. I knew from what Laurent has told me, there will be another session with Felix tomorrow. He'll be going over what will be happening and doing the final preparations. I was so exhausted that I had no problems to fall asleep.

The next day's training was hard and brutal, but I worked through the pain, knowing that tonight would be the hardest night of my life. I would be fighting for my life. Deep down I understood that I was no more than a means to an end. For Aro, I was disposable.

I was forced to rest before I was going to be taken to the venue. I had no idea where this would be or what I would face; this put me on edge.

As I heard footsteps approaching my cell, anxiety filled me and I felt bile rise in my throat. I swallowed it back, knowing I couldn't show any signs of weakness.

The cell door swung open and in stepped Laurent, Felix and flanked by some one that I vaguely recognized. This was it…fight night.

I fell to my knees, assuming my normal position to be restrained and I was quickly handcuffed. The hood followed shortly after.

Once I was lead through the tunnels and out into fresh air, I could hear a van pulling up. Laurent spoke to me. "Get inside, and sit down. I'll remove your hood momentarily, then it will have to go back in place…trust me."

This wasn't a question, but a statement. I felt like I had to reply, so I did. "I trust you."

He patted my shoulder to acknowledge my response. Once I was seated, the hood was removed and I saw Laurent's face before me. "I have to put these earphones into your ears now, and secure them with tape. Don't be alarmed; this is just so you aren't aware of where we're going, nothing more." I nodded slowly and watched as he approached with the earphones. Once they were in place, he put some duct tape over them to secure them. He nodded at me once before he turned on some music. I had no idea what it was. It was nothing that I had ever heard before, but it sounded like some kind of thrash metal. It was entirely loud and relentless. I winced at the volume and a weak smile graced Laurent's lips because he knew I couldn't hear a thing and the hood was placed back over my head.

The only thing I heard was the music and I was disorientated by the motion of the vehicle as it made its way to where ever our final destination was.

Finally, the vehicle slowed down and we left the smoother road and seemed to be travelling over rockier ground. I was thrown around the back of the van slightly. Then it came to a stop. Once again, panic and dread filled me and I expected to be grabbed and taken out of the back, but I wasn't. In the absence of my sight and hearing, I became aware when people would get out and slam the doors behind them, that I was alone. That scared me more than anything; the thought of being alone and no one knowing I was in here. I waited, the songs, if you can call them that, changed several times, so I quickly worked out that I had been left here for about 15 minutes based on my knowledge of average music tracks.

Then I jumped and screamed in initial shock as I felt hands grab my arms and drag me out of the van. I quickly composed myself knowing that making a fuss would probably result in use of force or the belt. I could feel someone on either side of me, and hands on my arms holding me upright until I could steady myself. Once I did, I was lead across the uneven ground before I was forced to sit down in a chair. I wondered what would happen to me now, and I was left wondering as more and more music played and assaulted my now ringing eardrums. But there was little I could do but wait.

The hood was removed and I saw that night had fallen, but my eyes still struggled to become accustomed to the light they were being allowed. I filled my lungs with the fresh air now that there wasn't a dirty, smelly barrier to it.

Taking in my surrounding, I couldn't see much. There was some open ground with weeds running rampant. There was a train line perched high on the wall at the far end of the land that we were on. In the far distance I could see the lights of a city, but I had no idea which one. I didn't recognize the skyline, but then again, I could probably look in the mirror and not recognize myself. There were lights from office buildings and apartment blocks twinkling like fairy lights on a tree. I would have given anything to be in the midst of them right now, and not sitting here awaiting my fate.

I was fully aware that there was something going on behind me, but I daren't look around. Maybe it was better not to know until I needed to. Then I remembered Aro's words about winning or losing, whatever he decided, and I knew he would be here, if not now, then very soon to deliver my fate for the night.

Suddenly, Laurent filled my field of vision. He gestured to ask if I was okay and I nodded, but made a face. He smiled at me, and then wrote a message on a small whiteboard. It said_: 'Stay calm and relax.'_

I replied, not sure if I was shouting or not. "What the fuck? How do you expect me to do that?"

He wrote his reply on the board, and this was how our conversation played out.

'_Don't panic. It will be okay, deep breaths'_

I snorted in response. "You are kidding me, right?'

He shook his head. _'No, sorry. The Boss will want to talk to you soon.'_

"Is he here already?" Panic filled me. Laurent simply nodded.

'_I have to go for a while; I have a job to do. Stay safe.'_

With that he left me. I wanted to pace around, but I dare not get off my seat, so my knees bounced up and down with the tension building in my body that I couldn't release. I wanted to be sick, but there was nothing to bring back up. Then Felix was standing in front of me, motioning for me to give him my hands. I did this without question. He produced some bandages from his pocket and began to wind it around my hand like I had seen boxers do. Each pass of the fabric bound my skin tighter and tighter and I knew this was really going to happen, so I closed my eyes.

The next thing I knew, my head was being pushed forward from behind and the earphones that have been taped to my ears were ripped off. It hurt, but I knew this pain would be nothing compared to the pain I would be in once tonight was over.

The quiet that I felt was soon replaced by cheers and shouts from what I assumed to be the assembled crowd. Laurent smiled at me. "It's a busy night tonight. A lot of people hate James and the thought of seeing him beaten and humiliated have brought many to us."

I mumbled a response. "Great. Do they know they're getting a stand in?" Laurent simply shook his head. Then he stood a little straighter and I saw his expressions change. He took a couple of steps back and bowed his head, as did the others that stood around. Then my line of vision landed Aro.

He swept majestically across the bland concrete as if he was walking across a marble floor; he showed not disdain or reaction to his surroundings. He came to a standstill right in front of me. "Evening, Mr. Cullen, so glad that you could join us." He smiled at me. We both knew I had no choice but to be here, and insolence from me would only anger him. "I do hope that you're ready for this evening's event. I know I'm certainly looking forward to them. Even though James isn't here, you'll be a worthy replacement to fight in his place. Marcus, however, is less than pleased with the absence of James through you're doing and will be most eager to display this."

I tried to get to my feet. "But I did nothing; James attacked me. I..."

Firm hands pushed me backwards and I was shocked to realize it was Aro who pushed me. His face was within inches of mine as he sneered. "I know that, you know that, but that isn't what I've told them."

He backed away grinning. "Remember when I said you would win or lose at my command?" I nodded. "Well, tonight, I want you to win."

I looked panicked, glancing from him to Laurent and back again. The look of shock was clear on Laurent's face; he was expecting me to lose, regardless of my instructions.

"But how?" I uttered, scrunching my eyebrows in confusion.

Aro laughed, clapping his hands together excitedly and I was reminded of our first meeting after I was taken. "That I don't care about but you must win Cullen or else, the consequences will be dire. Maybe not for you, but your family or Bella might be enough of an incentive, yes?"

I nodded slowly. He knew my Achilles heel was Bella and my family. I would do anything to keep them safe, and knowing that he and Bella slept together, made me sick. I wanted to get out of here, back to her more than anything.

"Good. Now prepare yourself, you're up after this next fight." He turned to Laurent and Felix. "Let him watch. He needs to get a feel for the crowd; they're vocal this fine evening." With that, he turned and walked away. My vision blurred slightly as I fought back the tears that welled up in my eyes.

Laurent appeared before me. "C'mon, Edward, I need to take you to see the fights. You _can_ do this."

_Could I? Really?_

Somehow, I got to my feet and my handcuffs we removed from one hand, only to be snapped onto Laurent's. "Sorry, I can't take any chances," he said as he lead me towards a large crowd. The noise was deafening, and I could make out the shouts of people as we passed them. They paid us little or no attention as we weaved our way though. The shouts were simple but chilling to me_. "Kill him!" Hit him harder!"_ _"C'mon!"_ All the shouts were mixed with delight and displeasure.

Once we made it to the front I was shocked at what I saw.

There were two men in the center of an unofficial ring. They were both bare chested and wearing, either jeans or shorts and they were covered in cuts and grazes. Then I saw the blood. One hit the other hard on the jaw and I saw him go down...hard. He hit the concrete and didn't move. His opponent was on him, kicking and punching him like he was nothing. My heart sank. I knew I couldn't go down; if I did, I wouldn't get back up. I would be dead, and more than anything, I wanted to live, to get out of here and back to my old life...to Bella.

The fight seemed to be over and the one who remained on his feet, claimed victory. Slips of paper were being torn up and thrown onto the ground like confetti by some, others were cheering and made their way out of the crowd, I assumed to claim their winnings. Laurent turned to me. "One more fight, then you're up. I need to take you back."

I nodded slowly before he turned and led me back to the area we had been in previously. As I sat down taking deep controlling breaths then I heard the announcement of the next fight and encouragement for people to place bets. I tried to block out the sounds and almost prayed that I was dreaming. Laurent came to me. "You want me to put the headphones back in for you?" I nodded frantically; never thinking that I would choose noise over the sounds of real people, but every cheer and holler I could hear, made me sick to my stomach.

Laurent turned and walked away, just as he did, I heard a massive cheer go up from the crowd and I couldn't take it any longer. I wanted to run. Run as fast as possible and never look back, but I didn't know where I was; what city or town I was in. _How would I get away from here?_ There was no way out.

Bile rose in my throat and then I vomited. I fell to my knees as my body tried to expel what I had inside from me.

Laurent was then kneeling in front of me, holding out a bottle of water. "Here, drink this. I know that it won't help, but at least it should help clear your mouth. There is no time now, the last fight is over. You're up now." I was glad that my stomach was now empty, but I couldn't stop the rising feeling of fear within me. It spread like cracks in a sheet of ice, splintering through me, reaching every part of my body. Mentally, I knew there was no way out of this. I had to fight, to win, but I had no idea how, or even what my opponent looked like.

Laurent touched my arm and it felt as if I had been shocked with electricity. I snapped my head to look at him. "Edward, you must do this."

I stood somehow, although very slowly, straightened my back and held my head up high.

A detached voice that didn't sound like mine and said in a firm voice. "I can do this, I am Volturi."

Laurent smiled at me, patting me on the shoulder. "You are and you will earn that right tonight when you win. Now keep your focus. Remember everything that you have been taught, and fight as if your life depends on it."

I smiled a grim smile. "Laurent, not only my life, but Bella's and my families do."

He nodded slowly. "You need to remove your shirt. That will give him an unfair advantage." He removed my handcuffs so could I removed my shirt, handing it to Laurent who put it on the chair I had just vacated. Placing his hand on my elbow he led me forward, towards the crowd, who were now baying for action.

As we walked through the opening that had formed, I was shocked to see Felix carrying a body over his shoulder; it was covered in blood. As he passed Laurent, he smirked and said. "For disposal later." I kept my focus looking forward. I knew the person he was carrying, was dead. He had died in the previous fight, but I needed to remain calm, which was proving increasingly difficult.

Once we were at the side of the circle where the fight would take place, I heard an announcement over a loudspeaker. "Gentlemen, now is the fight that you've all been waiting for." A loud cheer went up. "However, I have some news for you all. There's been a last minute substitution." A ripple went through the crowd. "James is unavailable tonight; however, the man who made him unavailable has kindly agreed to take his place for your entertainment." The crowd booed and I wanted to run. They didn't want me, they wanted James.

I turned to Laurent who read my body language and motioned to someone I didn't see...it was Felix. He came and held me in place; there was no way out of this.

"This man, who is nameless, comes from the house of the Volturi, and has been personally trained by their greatest ever fighter, Felix." A loud cheer went up. "Now meet the opponent that will face Marcus this evening." With that, I was pushed forward into the center of the circle by Felix. I struggled to stay upright, and I saw a sea of angry faces before me; all shouting and screaming at me. I couldn't make out what they were saying from the wall of noise that echoed across the area. Then the disembodied voice came back on. "Place your bets quickly gentlemen."

Then I was joined in the circle by Felix and Laurent. Felix grabbed my shoulders and said in a low voice. "Cullen, remember you're to win this fight. Do. Not. Lose. He commands it." He motioned with his eyes and I turned to see Aro standing at the front of the circle. There was a group of men in suits behind him; he nodded slowly at me, a smile on his face as he mouthed the word-Win.

The crowd let up a huge cheer as my opponent entered the circle; he threw his hands high above his head in a victory salute. He was larger than me, a well-built man with defined muscles on his chest and arms. This was hopeless; there was no way that I could win against him.

He took a tour of the circle and then came to face me, standing so close that I could feel his breath on my face. He surveyed my face for a few moments before he spoke. "So, you're the fucker that cheated me out of my revenge on that bastard James? Hmmm...Not what I expected, but you'll do. This'll be a fucking easy win for me, although, I'll make no money from the betting. I mean, who would bet on you to win?"

My bravado kicked in. "Some would, I mean, you said it yourself, who would expect me to take James out?"

He cocked his head to one side. "What's your name?"

I thought about using my real name, but decided to use a false one. "Jake, why?"

Marcus laughed. "So when I kill you, I'll know what name to have tattooed on my back." He slowly turned and I saw several names on his shoulder blades already. "I'll take great delight in putting your name on this list, then I'll put James' on there too when he's back."

He turned and walked away. I closed my eyes and took a few deep breaths. This wasn't going to be easy. I mean, if he has already killed people, he could easily kill me, too.

He approached Laurent who handed him a bottle of water, which he drank quickly before crushing it in his hand and throwing it to the ground.

The loudspeaker voice spoke again. "Gentlemen, betting's are now closed; the fight will begin."

I watched in horror as Marcus turned to me, a wide grin on his face as he growled and shouted across the space between us. "You're mine Jake! Prepare to die!"

**Authors Note:**

Thanks as always to the angel that is Dreamofrob10 who is betaing this mess for me. Please do check her new fic Ghostly Double, it is AMAZING.

I hope you appreciate this quick update, you have Tash who I work with to thank as she has just started this and came upto me at work and told me that I had to update, she couldn't wait!

I will probably be posting this while travelling at breakneck speed on the train to London for the UK Twific meet up where I will get to meet some wonderful friends that I have made and I cannot wait to see you all!

Until next time… Which is written and beta'd


	18. Fight Night Part Two

**Disclaimer: I own nothing – no copyright infringement is intended.**

**IMPORTANT - PLEASE SEE THE NOTE AT THE BOTTOM - I MESSED UP ON POSTING THIS IS A CHAPTER THAT YOU MIGHT HAVE ALREADY READ! .**

This was it - the moment that I had been dreading for so long, but the one that would possibly keep Bella and my family safe and out of that monsters claws.

A man stepped in between us. He seemed to be some sort of referee as he spoke with clear authority. Marcus was paying attention to him, although, I had the distinct feeling that he knew what was going to be said.

"You know the rules, there are none." The man turned to me and smiled. "Just kidding, I want no weapons of any sort, just an entertaining fight." He walked away a few paces before he turned and said, "Try not to kill each other. Getting rid of the bodies is proving to get harder and harder."

Marcus held out his hand to me. I assumed in a gentlemanly gesture, but I was wrong. When he took mine in his, he pulled me toward him, causing the fear in me to spike because he was crushing the bones in my hand. He twisted it and pain shot up my arm, and the angle, caused my knees to begin to buckle under me. I knew if I went down now, I would probably not get back up. "You're going to regret taking James out. Amateur." Looking at him, I refused to back down and stared into his eyes, seeing steely determination in them.

Seeing that determination, I managed a reply. "Yeah, we'll see about that." I remembered everything that Felix had taught me, especially when you're in a vulnerable position to play on it, and so I did.

We were locked together, and he seemed to be enjoying the cheers of the crowd for catching me off guard like this, so I allowed my knees to bend slightly. He leaned over me, which was right where I wanted him and then I acted.

Somehow, I managed to keep my strength in my legs and hooked one around his, pulling it out from under him. He fell heavily to the ground, completely caught off guard. The crowd went deathly silent before erupting into cheers. I stood and met his stare of surprise. He muttered under his breath. "Lucky break." Before getting to his feet and holding his hand up to the crowd, who simply cheered louder.

We backed away from each other, sizing each other up, moving in a circle like a crab would. I knew he would make the first move and I needed to be ready. I managed to block out the screams of the baying mob around me, and pretend it was just us two. My imagination made me think, this was a schoolyard fight, but all the ones I had seen, had not been life or death like this.

Marcus swung his right hand back and I managed to avoid the first punch by swerving, but I didn't see the left fist until it was too late. It made contact with my face. And it hurt.

I staggered back in shock, but was fully aware of the fact that, if I let him land another punch on me, it would take me down fully, and I wasn't about to let that happen. I felt like a man possessed, and began my attack on him, blocking and landing blows as quickly as possible. I was glad Felix trained me so well. The whole thing felt like an out of body experience, and adrenalin was pumping through me so hard, and right now, I felt like I could conquer the world. There was no pain… nothing. I knew this fight needed to be won by me, and win, was what I intended to do.

The fight wasn't easy. I found myself being over powered by Marcus on several occasions. He managed to get a low blow in, and while I was doubled over in pain, trying desperately to get my breath, he hit me on the back, sending me down. I hit the ground hard and the crowd bayed for my blood. Marcus was overly confident and looked toward the crowd, seeking their approval. That gave me a moment to look toward Laurent, who was motioning for me to get up, it was hard, but I was getting to my feet when I saw Aro sitting behind him, a look of clear displeasure on his face. He fixed me with a glare and slowly shook his head at me, mouthing one word that I read, loud and clear..._'Bella.'_

I screwed my eyes closed in agony, only opening them as Marcus leaned down low over me, sneering openly in my face. "Not so fucking cocky now, are we? Eh...Jakey boy?" He threw me to the ground and said words that I couldn't quite believe I was hearing.

"No wonder your woman would rather have another man in her bed."

I felt a fire ignite inside of me and scrabbled to my feet. "What the fuck did you say?" I pushed him backwards and caused him to stumble slightly. I was right in his face.

He shook his head as if he was trying to clear it. He closed and then opened his eyes, and began to slowly blink.

He answered me with a sneer. "I said, she would rather have your boss in her bed than you. Maybe she'd let James in there, too. I mean, look at you." He gestured toward me and then I noticed a change in his stance. Part of me wondered if he was alright, but the part of me that needed to stay alive...won through.

I landed a punch on him, squarely on the jaw, causing him to stumble backwards before he started toward me. He seemed slower than before or maybe it was my anger and blind rage at him.

He attempted to hit me back, but I was quicker than him. I, either, blocked or ducked each blow as it came. I punched him hard on the jaw and watched in surprise as he went down like a pack of cards, hitting the cold, hard concrete hard. I wasn't going to leave it there. I kicked him hard in the ribs until he pulled himself into a ball to protect himself. At that point, I walked away from him, scared of the pure rage that I felt within me. I had never felt this angry before.

The referee came back to me, taking my right hand and raising my arm aloft, declaring me the winner. I pulled away from him and screamed out in rage and relief into the faces of the people who had been watching the fight. Some seemed shocked where as others, applauded me. I felt like I had no control over myself, the adrenaline rush was intense.

Laurent joined me, and threw his arm around my shoulder. I turned to face him and he quickly removed his arm and held his hands up in surrender. Quickly, he was joined by Felix, who seemed to appear out of nowhere like a ghost. He took my arm roughly and led me away from the crowds. Once we were back at the area I had been in previously, he thrust me towards a couple of other guards before he turned on Laurent.

"What the fuck did you do to him?" He spat.

"Why? He needed to win, Felix. We both knew that. Had he lost tonight, we would all have paid the price. You know that, too."

Felix looked toward me. "How? You do know The Boss will want to know. We need to tell him something."

Laurent never got the chance to answer because Aro arrived, clapping his hands together. "Mr. Cullen, I never expected you to come through in such a fantastic fashion. I'm impressed."

I smiled at him. "Thanks."

"Now, you've made me some money, tonight, and done as you were told. Finally, you're learning. I can't wait to see what happens at your next outing."

He then turned to Felix and said something that I couldn't make out. Then again, I didn't care. I had won, and the buzz from that was immense. I felt like I could take on the world.

My joy was short-lived when it became apparent that it was now time for me to be handcuffed again. I started to fight against it because they were trying to put the hood back over my head. I shouted at them, "Why? I did everything you asked of me. I fought...I won! Yet you treat me like this; worse than an animal."

It was Felix who grabbed me, pinning me to the back of the van by my throat. "Because Cullen, that's all you are to him. You're on object, a possession. You serve a purpose only as long as he allows it. If he says I am supposed to kill you, then I kill you. Simple." I desperately clawed at his hands, but it was useless. He was stronger than I was, and could ever hope to be. I could feel the air leaving my body as my vision blurred and swam. I could see Felix's face as he sneered at me. I went lightheaded and struggled to keep my eyes open as he released me. I fell to the ground in a heap, gasping desperately for air. My hands went my throat only to be grabbed, then I felt the cold familiar steel of the handcuffs as they closed around my wrists.

Felix started barking out his orders. "Get him back and cleaned up. You know the score." Before he vanished again and two of his henchmen grabbed me, I fought against them, not caring what happened to me. I was rewarded by a reminder from the belt and its power over me. The pain didn't feel as intense as I was used to. That in itself was strange, but it still overpowered me before I felt myself spiralling into a darkness that I couldn't escape.

My eyes slowly opened, not having any idea where I was. I could see nothing through the pitch black that surrounded me. I was lying down and felt sick. That was all I was able to take in.

There was a rocking motion and from the low hum, I worked out quickly that I was in back of a vehicle of some kind. I tried to move and then it all came back to me. I must've been en route back to Volterra.

As the van took a sharp turn, I rolled into something. It felt like a person, but without being able to see, I couldn't be sure. They didn't respond to the contact, so I figured that I must've been wrong.

My eyes strained in the darkness. I noticed they hadn't put the hood on me, figuring that I would be out of it for a while. I reached out with restrained hands towards the large shape that was sharing my space and recoiled when I felt cold clammy flesh.

Slowly, I reached out again. This time, aware of what I would encounter, my hands made contact and shook them. I whispered in a hushed voice. "Hey, are you okay over there?" There was no response, so I shook a little harder and still nothing.

Realization dawned on me who it was. The body of the man that I had seen earlier; the one that Felix had been carrying away at the fight.

Shit! This dead man was inches away from me and they were going to dispose of him like a sack of garbage. Bile rose in my throat at the thought. I wondered about his family. Would they know what had happened to him? Would they care? Was he just another pawn in this madman's game where everyone is expendable and worthless as long as he comes out a winner? This could so easily become my fate. A lifeless body in the back of a van on its way to its final resting place.

Tears filled my eyes before I was jolted from those thoughts by the ground we were travelling on, became rough. It was so bumpy, causing me to be bounced around. Suddenly, we came to a stop, so I closed my eyes and pretended to still be out of it, not knowing what the punishment for seeing this would be.

The doors were opened and I heard voices that I didn't recognize. There were other vehicle doors opened and closed along footsteps approaching. The familiar voices of Laurent and Felix got closer.

Felix started barking orders in his usual tone. "You! Get rid of it. Make sure it's done properly this time. Last time, there were too many questions raised it made the papers. The Boss wasn't happy at all."

"I'll throw him in the river. It flows pretty fast around here. It'll carry him far enough away. Anyway, we're far enough…"

He never finished what he was going to say. I heard, what sounded like someone being pushed against the van door before Felix snarled. "I don't care what you do with it; just fucking deal with it. The less we know, the better and you know that. Just fucking do it."

Someone climbed into the back of the van, so I laid as still as I could. He nudged me and I didn't respond.

"Felix, you want me to get rid of this one too? Dispose of all the dead weight at the same time?"

I heard Felix laugh. "No, although the thought is tempting. That one proved himself tonight. The Boss would be very angry if you got rid of him just yet. "

Instantly, I heard the sound of dragging. I wanted to shudder when I felt the nameless dead man's arms touching me as he was pulled out the van. I assumed he was being pulled out by his feet. The urge to pull away was almost unbearable, but I couldn't let them know I was conscious.

"Laurent, check on Cullen. I have no fucking idea what you did to him before the fight, but you did well. I'm just not sure how much the Haloperidol will interact with it."

"I only…" Laurent started, only to be cut off by Felix.

"I said I didn't want to know. Now check to see if he's at least breathing. We'll need to make sure that Doc is on hand when we get back to give him the once over."

With that, I heard footsteps leading away before there was a presence next to me. I remained still and unspeaking. Laurent spoke in a low voice that only I would be able to hear, but he was clearly talking to himself. "Do fucking this, do fucking that, Laurent. I'm more than a fucking errand boy. I've earned my place here." He let out a deep sigh and his hand took my chin before he turned my head from side to side. "Hmmm...You seem to be in pretty good shape." He felt my pulse next then breathing before he laid me into the recovery position. He assumed I was still out of it. He resumed his ramblings. "One day I'll be free from being their fucking whipping boy and I can't wait; patience is a virtue, though."

After listening to his ramblings and feeling him check over me, he climbed out of the van, closing the doors behind him. I heard him talking to Felix. "He's okay; still out of it. How much did you give him?"

The voices got further and further away and I couldn't make out what they were saying. A wave of nausea flooded through me, my whole body tingled and I blacked out once again.

**Authors Note:**  
>Beta'd by Dream Of Rob10 – a million thanks for making this make sense.<p>

Thanks for reading and reviewing if you chose to do so.

SORRY! I messed up when I was posting these and missed out a chapter altogether . This is now corrected and I have had to move things around to make it right. So you have a new chapter that you haven't read. It covers Edward waking up after being abducted and explains how he feels. That is now chapter 9 - Where Am I?


	19. What's Up Doc?

**Disclaimer: I own nothing – no copyright infringement is intended.**

My eyes flickered open as a groan escaped my lips. It felt as if something crawled into my throat and died. I ached everywhere and with a dull breath, there was a steeling ache around my ribs.

I managed to sit upright, but not without a few curse words falling from my lips. Then it all came flooding back to me. The fight...Marcus...Aro...my win.

A small smile played at my lips as the memories came thick and fast. I had done what was asked of me. Fighting to win, although, I wasn't sure how. Marcus was a huge man and far more experienced in this world, than me. Yet, I managed to win.

I pulled up my shirt and began to examine my ribs. The bruises were evident, but they didn't look too bad. They were my war wounds; proof that I had survived…that I had lived.

Then it hit me like a truck. Someone died last night; I had been so close to their body in the back of the van. The body that they so thoughtlessly disposed of like it was a bag of garbage; like he was no one. But, I suppose in this world, you're nothing, I remember Felix telling me that. I had kept quiet because I valued my own life and feared that they wouldn't think twice about ending me if they suspected I was conscious.

I lay back down; my hands folded behind my head staring at the ceiling, knowing that someone would be in to check on me, soon. There was a vague memory pulling at the corners of my mind. Something Laurent had said about being free and I knew how he felt; I wanted nothing more. Maybe my feeling that I could get Laurent on my side wasn't as foolish as I first thought. Right now, he was my best hope of help to escape this hell hole, but I couldn't let him know I had heard him._ No_, that would be dangerous. I needed to get him to trust me. It would be hard and I knew that, but the least I could do, was try.

The door to the cell was thrown open and it rebounded off the wall with a loud bang. I came rushing back into the normal world, from my memories, my heart beating furiously against my chest. As I sat up, again, everything in front of me swirled and I fell to the floor. Hearing the laughter around me, I fought to keep my eyes open and lost.

Bright light assaulted my eyes as my lids were forced open and then the light would disappear before it came back, again. I struggled to sit up, only to find that I was restrained. I fought against them, feeling like my whole body was being held down and I struggled in vain.

A voice broke through, what were clearly my own screams. "Edward! Edward! Calm down, your safe." The now familiar face of Laurent filled my field of vision. I stopped struggling, allowing my head to rest on the bed once again.

"What happened? I was in my cell, and then I was here. I…I don't understand," I whispered in a hoarse voice.

"I'm not sure; I was called when you were brought here. They figured that you needed to see a friendly face when you came around. Failing that, I was summoned."

He laughed at his own humor, and I smiled at him. "Laurent, you're the friendliest face I know around these parts."

I watched from my restraints as he stepped away from me, turning to someone I couldn't see. "Doc, can you remove his restraints, or loosen them? He's clearly okay, now." I couldn't hear what was said in response, but it was obviously an agreement. The restraints were removed, giving me a chance to slowly sit up. I rubbed my wrists, rolling my head to relieve some of the ache in my neck. I smiled up at Laurent as he gave me a slight nod in return.

The doctor was left the room, his head bowed when the door opened and Aro swept into the room. Laurent immediately bowed his head, also.

Aro stood smiling at me. "Ah, I'm so pleased to see my star from last night, unharmed." He touched my arm and I had to work hard not to flinch from his touch. "How are you feeling today, Mr. Cullen?"

I was about to answer him when I noticed the doctor turned to me, his face falling.

I looked at him with curiosity. He looked vaguely familiar to me, but I couldn't place where I knew him from. My attention was drawn back to Aro as he snapped his fingers in front of my face. "Answer me! You might have won last night, and had an unfortunate turn this morning, but I will not allow any insolence from you."

"Sorry, I thought that I recognized…" I didn't get chance to finish what I was about to say when a tray of medical equipment was knocked to the floor by the doctor. Aro turned to him, and he apologized profusely for his error. Our eyes met for the briefest of moments and what I can only describe as a pleading look, flashed through his eyes as his head moved slightly from side to side.

"Cullen! Do we have to go through this, again?" He sighed. "I thought you knew better than this by now."

I felt panic rise within me. I really didn't want to annoy him further; I thought I was getting on his good side, if he had one, which I secretly doubted. However, if I wished to keep breathing, which I did, then I needed to keep Aro happy.

"Sorry, I forgot my place. It won't happen, again." Climbing off the bed, I sank to my knees, my head bowed. I heard him chuckle deeply before his laugh rang out in the room.

Once he stopped laughing, he came and stood in front of me, his fingers raising my head so I could look at him. "This time, you're forgiven, Cullen. You appear to know your place. You're also giving me the respect that is required. Now, you'll answer my question. How are you feeling, today?"

Maintaining the eye contact, I replied, "I'm okay, thank you. I'm grateful for the care that's being afforded to me."

He removed his fingers and my head fell downward. "Good. I understand that there were some issues last night. I'll need to address those and take action where necessary." Aro walked around the room, his hands clasped behind his back. I wondered what I had done wrong, and what my punishment would be.

I decided to plead my case. "I'm sorry, Master, I did as you commanded. I obeyed orders… I fought and I won. Please? What did I do wrong?" It was hard to keep my voice from catching, the words rushing from my lips.

The pacing stopped and for a second, so did my heart. I screwed my eyes closed; waiting for the shock that I thought would come. I was braced for it to decimate me, but it never came. Opening my eyes, I raised my head, looking at Aro who looked amused.

"What? You thought that I was angry with you, Cullen?" I nodded slowly. "No, this time you haven't done anything wrong. Not that I have been told of. Maybe I need to question my staff more thoroughly, if you're worried."

Laurent stepped forward. "Master, there's nothing I need to report to you regarding Mr. Cullen. He was well behaved and followed orders given to him without question."

Aro smiled. "I knew that already, Laurent, but thank you for confirming this. However, there are questions over how exactly Mr. Cullen, appeared to win so easily against Marcus. The fight shouldn't have been that easy for him. I expected Marcus to beat him to a pulp before he fought back to win as instructed. I wanted him taught a lesson, but it appears that there might've been some outside interference. Doc, a full blood screen will show what I need to know, will it not?"

My head snapped to the doctor who nodded slowly. "There might be a trace still in his system, and I took a sample of blood when he returned as a precaution. I can have it tested for you quickly."

Aro nodded and the doctor bowed his head before he left the room. I stared after him before my field of vision was filled with Laurent indicating that I should follow as he led me back to my cell. As we left, Aro called after us. "Laurent, I'll see you and Felix in my office. There are some loose ends that I need to ensure are tied up." Laurent nodded, closing the door behind us.

Once back in my cell, I felt safe, so I asked Laurent, "Will Aro find anything in my blood that I need to be worried about?"

He shook his head. "No, you were aided, but the effects would only be temporary and that blood sample has been replaced already with another. We covered all the bases, knowing that he would want to check your blood." His voice dropped. "He can't find out, ever."

I looked at him, wanting to know what happened. "What exactly did you do to me? I want.._.no_, I deserve to know."

Laurent sighed, "It's better that you don't know. Just trust in me and know that what we did was for your own good."

Taking in the look on his face, I could see there was concern there. He thought I would betray him by telling Aro what he had done, but I wouldn't. I needed Laurent on my side.

"Laurent, I wouldn't betray you to him. You've been nothing but kind to me since I got here. Why would I throw away the only friend I have here?" I reached out, touching his arm and was horrified when he flinched away from me; his hand finding its way around my throat, constricting my breathing. He growled in a low voice. "I am not your friend. Do not mistake my kindness for friendship, or weakness on my part. I am here to help you as I am ordered to."

His eyes were vacant as if he wasn't seeing me and that scared me slightly. I had never seen him look so uncaring. Not knowing what to say in response, I said nothing, thinking that it would be my best option. I had no idea how much he had risked personally, to ensure that the blood samples were switched and I didn't want to upset him. That had obviously been done at great risk, not only to himself, but there must have been others involved.

I watched stiffly as he turned to leave and as he closed the door, I heard the sound of the key turn in the lock.

I spoke, not sure if he would hear me or not. "I'm sorry, Laurent, I didn't mean to."

If he heard, he didn't acknowledge me other than seeing his body straighten up before he walked away, leaving me alone once again with only my thoughts for company.

It seemed like I was on my own for hours. Not that I minded, time alone meant that I could try to work out where exactly I recognized the doctor from. I was damn sure that he was one of my father's colleagues, but how the hell had he get involved in such a dark world? Was he the _in house _doctor for this madman? I needed to know and I wondered when I would get to see him again. Maybe I would be lucky after the next fight.

After food was brought to me, Felix stopped by. He didn't open the cell door, but stood at the other side and spoke to me. "You did well last night, Cullen. Don't make the mistake of thinking that it will always be that easy. You had an advantage; one that I wasn't aware of. I'm glad you're not hurt though."

I snickered at his concern and muttered, "Thanks." Only to be shot down in proverbial flames.

"Oh, don't think I meant that in a good way. I only care that you'll be fit enough to fight again the day after tomorrow. That should've been your first outing, but _no_, James had to go and fuck things up by testing my patience." He let out a loud sigh, "That's of no consequence now, what's done is done. You just need to keep doing as you're told, otherwise, the consequences will be severe for all of us."

With that, he turned and walked away, leaving my brain to run over what he had just said. I would be fighting again, so soon? I hadn't expected it to be so soon. In my mind there would be a longer gap between fights...time to recuperate. _There would be others fighting_ _wouldn't there? Why me?_ I couldn't keep up with the cacophony of thoughts that ran through my head. I mean, last night was scary as fuck, but I didn't know what to expect. Now, I actually knew what was going to happen. And as I thought more, I knew exactly what could happen, causing my blood run cold.

Screwing my eyes closed, I pulled my knees to my chest and curled myself into a ball, hoping to find some comfort here, but there was none. Then, I remembered I had Bella's shirt still. I ran my hand under the thin mattress that I laid on, feeling for the split that I had found on the bottom. It was where I had stashed it away, praying that it wouldn't be found. My fingers made contact with the soft fabric and instantly I felt slightly calmer. Just knowing that a small piece of her was with me in this hell hole, gave me some peace.

I resumed my position and pressed the shirt to my face, drinking in her scent, which was fading away, daily. I just had to hope that I wasn't fading from her life, from her thoughts in this way, even though, I deserved to be a figment of her imagination for everything that I had done.

I woke from a dream - or should that be nightmare - with sweat covering me, as my heart pounded at a million miles an hour. I ran my hand over my face and what was once my hair, as I tried to calm myself. Knowing that most of what I had dreamt was true, I was having flashbacks to the fight.

I lay back down, calming my breathing and closing my eyes, once again. I was immediately transported back to the van after last night's fight. I was locked in the back with that lifeless body next to me. I was horrified at the fact that he was disposed of like a sack of garbage. As I turned my head toward him, his eyes snapped open and he spoke. _ No_, he begged me. "Tell my family. They need to know I loved them. I did this for them. Please?" His battered and blood soaked hand stretched out toward me, causing me to flinch away from him in a mixture of disgust and sheer horror. That was when I woke up in absolute terror.

Screams, feral and loud, echoed around the cell that I was in and I found myself wondering who was making such a noise. The door to my cell swung open and a couple of men, I didn't recognize, grabbed me, pinning me onto the bed. I fought hard against them, but it was no use. They were stronger than me, plus they had an advantage over me as they fastened me into the restraints on the sides of my bed. I thrashed against them, but it was no use. Then my body was rocked as a surge of electricity ran through it, immobilizing me.

The doctor stepped into the cell, his face dropping when he saw me lying there, restrained. He took a couple of steps toward me. It was only then, that I realized those screams that sounded so terrible and tortured, were coming from me...not anyone else.

"Leave me the fuck alone." I sobbed, tears rolling down my cheeks as I watched him approach me. "Please." I croaked.

I heard him speak in a calm voice. "Leave us." There was a pause before he barked the final word, "Now!"

Through my own sobs, I couldn't make out what was said after that, but I got the idea that the guards were not happy with the thought of leaving us alone. It wasn't like I could do anything to him.

My eyes widened as he stood and I saw him rummage in his pocket, producing a syringe. Uncapping the needle he took a step toward me and I begged him. "No, no, no, please don't."

He ignored my desperate plea and I felt the familiar bite as the needle punctured my skin. A wave of calmness washed over me. He crouched down next to my bed, level with my ear and whispered. "Edward, I'm so sorry. I'll come back later, but I had to do this. Close your eyes. I'll be back...I promise."

I felt calmer, but didn't black out like I normally did. I just zoned out and relaxed. This felt nice, warm and comforting. I remained still as the restraints were removed from me, but I couldn't move even if I wanted to.

There were no dreams, nothing and it was nice. The next thing I knew, I could feel someone shaking me gently and a voice whispered in my ear. "Edward, Edward. Can you hear me? I need you to wake up."

The voice pulled me out of my haze and my eyes fluttered open. I wasn't sure who I expected to find standing over me. I certainly wasn't expecting it to be the Doc from earlier.

I attempted to sit up, but he pushed me back down. "No, you need to rest. I gave you a sedative, not as much as they wanted. They wanted you unconscious, comatose, but I had to speak to you and tonight seemed the best time."

Watching him, my eyebrows furrowed together. "I... I know you don't I?" He nodded slowly.

"Yes, Edward, you do. I'm Doctor Gerandy, I've known you for many years. You used to call me Doc when you were little when I worked with your father, Carlisle. I haven't seen him for the last couple of months. I've been... occupied. How is he?"

I really couldn't believe what he was asking me. I was locked up in the dungeon of a madman, forced to fight to survive, to keep my family safe, and he was asking me how my father was, like we met in the street.

"Are you fucking serious? I'm here, in hell, a prisoner of some fucking nutjob. My family doesn't know if I'm dead or alive. My girlfriend keeps being threatened and you react like we're meeting for coffee. Can you not see just how fucked up this whole situation is?"

He took a deep breath. "I'm sorry Edward. I thought you were here of your own free will. Many do come here willingly."

I was exasperated. "Free will? Fuck! You think that I would get messed up in this by choice? Have you not seen what they do to me?"

He took in a deep breath. "I did think it was strange, but I know they do like to make sure that people obey; it's part of their training."

Aware that I needed to keep my voice down, I continued, "I was abducted off the street, brought here and forced into this. I...My..." Words caught in my throat. Taking a deep breath, I managed somehow to continue, "My family doesn't know where I am." Looking into his eyes, I saw realization hit him. "I need them to know that I'm alive at least. They'll be frantic." I let the words hang, hoping that he would take the hint that I was dropping right in front of him. He didn't seem to be taking the hint. "Look, Dr. Gerandy, I hate to ask, but you know my father. Would you be able to relay a message to him?"

Panic crossed his face and he began to pace the cell, mumbling to himself. "I wouldn't ask but I'm desperate. I just want them to know that I'm okay. I was forced to send them letters; to lie, telling them not to look for me. I need them to know that I'm okay."

Turning to face me, he looked toward the open door before he stepped toward me. "I can't risk it. I'm sorry, Edward. If they found out, they would kill me...you know this."

He turned and walked out of my cell, closing the door softly behind him. Once again, I closed my eyes and prayed for some hope to find me in the middle of the darkness that engulfed me.

Daybreak came much quicker than I had hoped and after a meagre meal, I was taken through the maze of tunnels. Once again, I assumed to the gym for another work out before I was forced to fight again tomorrow. The thought made me physically sick, but there was nothing that I could do.

That day I trained hard with Felix and someone else, I was pushed to my limits, but refused to break down or give in. If this was what I had to do, then I would do it. The session was long and tiring. Once it was over, I expected to be taken back to my cell, but we took a detour, leaving me wondering where I was being taken.

I was surprised when I was taken to the room where I had been examined by the doctor yesterday. Once inside, I was pushed to sit on the exam table and the guards that escorted me, left the room. It wasn't like I could go anywhere.

Looking around the room, I took in everything in the sparse room. The brilliant white walls and stainless steel cabinet in the corner, made it feel clinical. I was in the middle of wondering what was contained inside, when the door opened and closed. In stepped Dr. Gerandy, clipboard in hand. I had to fight every urge I had to hurt him, following his refusal to help me last night.

"Good evening, Mr. Cullen." He said, as he stepped toward me. I just looked at him. "Ah, you must be wondering why you're here? Well, I just wanted to check you over, again, after your training session today." He stepped closer to me and produced a stethoscope from his pocket and proceeded to listen to my chest. The rest of the examination went just as smoothly. It was business like. He spoke as he described what he was doing to me, leaving me wondering why he felt the need to do this.

Just as I thought he was finished, he tilted my head to one side and examined closer to the cut above my eye. His breathing was labored against my cheek and I physically jumped when he whispered in my ear. "I'll help you. Tell me what you want to say and I'll deliver the message."

He pulled away from me, fixing me with a stare, bringing his index finger deftly to his lips, indicating that I should be silent. His eyes flickered to the right of the room and mine followed slowly and saw what he was trying to tell me. There was a small surveillance camera nestled in the corner of the room on the ceiling. I nodded slowly, showing that I understood.

He took a step back from me, a smile playing on his lips and he mouthed a single word to me that gave me some hope. _"Tonight."_

The guards came back into the room now that the examination was over; confirming what I suspected. Someone was watching remotely and they led me back to my cell. All I had to do now…was wait.

Authors Note:  
>Thanks as always to DreamofRob10 for betaing this for me and to everyone for reading.<p>

Sorry for the delay in updating, Steph who is my beta was involved in a serious car accident (not her fault) and luckily escaped with minor injuries. She ended up with a broken wrist which required surgery, meaning that she has been on restricted duties while she healed and was cast free.

On a brighter note, Taken is nominated in the Energize Awards! Voting runs until 20th November and there are some great stories up, but if you want to cast a vote for me then you will need to visit: http (:/) .

When I originally wrote this, there were two POV's and this got confusing so I have put Bella's POV into it's own story. It is posting under the title Missing. There are a couple of chapters up already, link on my profile.


	20. Moving On

**Disclaimer: I own nothing – no copyright infringement is intended.**

* * *

><p>The hours that passed since he left me, seemed to drag out forever. I thought about what I would want to say to them. I knew I should be resting before tonight's fight, but that was the last thing on mind. This was my chance to let my family know that I was okay, and I intended to grab it with both hands.<p>

Hearing footsteps approaching my cell, I thought it was Dr. Gerandy, so I sat up. I was excited and ready, but only to be disappointed when I saw Laurent and Felix standing on the other side of the door.

"Mr. Cullen, you seem pleased to see us. Are you looking forward to tonight, especially?"

I sat back down on the bed. I thought somehow Dr. Gerandy had let me down, but why had I expected anything other than to be disappointed?

Mumbling, I answered them. "No, why, are you planning on taking me somewhere special? I thought maybe dinner and a movie?"

A swift backhand across my face, told me my attempt at humor, wasn't appreciated. The force, with which he struck me, knocked me sideways and I banged my head on the wall. Instinctively, my hand went to where it had made contact with the bricks and when I brought my hand away, there appeared to be a small amount of blood, which I assumed was from a wound.

"You really do push your luck by trying my patience, so much, Cullen." Felix's voice reverberated off the walls that surrounded me and I felt the anger resonating from him, so I remained silent. I then felt my jaw being grabbed and my eyes met his as he turned my face from side to side. "Go get Doc. Last thing I need right now is him being hurt and not able to take part in tonight's festivities."

I looked, and from the corner of my eye, I saw Laurent nod and leave. The silence was awkward between us. I dare no speak and Felix seemed to be trying to regain his control as he paced back and forth.

Laurent and Dr. Gerandy, arrived and I watched as Felix and Laurent left so that I could be examined in peace. I thought that maybe Felix was concerned that he had done more damage than he thought.

Doc checked me over in silence, and the tension between us hung heavily as I plucked up the courage to ask him the question that I was desperate for an answer. After a lot of uhming and ahhing, I was a bundle of pure nerves.

He beat me to it, as he leaned forward to look at the gash on my head, whispering in my ear. "In my pocket you'll find pen and paper. Write down your message and I'll ensure that your father gets it." He glanced around. "Be quick...I can't guarantee how long they'll leave us alone for."

I managed to scribble down. _'I'm okay, and alive. Please don't worry about me. I'm in a bit of_ _trouble and trying to sort it out_. _Don't worry about me, I got myself into this mess and I_ _intend to get myself out of it._ _All I ask is that you don't look for me._ _I'll try to get in touch_ _again, just trust me._

_Edward_

My writing was scrawled, but I knew they would recognize it as being my hand. I just hoped they would put this together with my previous letter and understand that I was in deep shit. As much as I wanted them to look for me, I wanted them to stay safe. They were important to me and I doubted I would be kept here forever, or at least I hoped that I wouldn't.

Doc took the letter and quickly folded it and put it in his pocket. He simply smiled at me. I was sure he was going to say something as he opened his mouth to speak, but was interrupted by Felix and Laurent entering the room, again.

Felix addressed Doc directly, "He get the all clear?" The response was non-verbal as Doc nodded furiously, not able to make eye contact. Maybe he felt guilty about helping me. I could see the guilt on his face and my eyes quickly went to Felix, whose narrowed eyes were glaring at me. Immediately, I averted my gaze. Felix let out a heavy sigh. _Shit! Did he know?_ _How could he?_ No…I had to get a grip on myself. I was just being paranoid.

"C'mon, Cullen, you know the drill by now," Felix barked, bringing me out of my internal musings. Immediately, I found myself on my knees on the floor, arms stretched out in front of me, head bowed. The cold steel of the handcuffs wrapped around my wrists and I dropped them in front of me, keeping my head down.

There was deep chuckle from Felix. Then, I saw his feet appear in my line of sight before he crouched down in front of me, speaking in a loud voice that sent chills through me. "He knows his place like any well trained pet should. See how readily he obeys orders, now? Who would've thought he would learn so quickly."

I remained still and silent, feeling a bubble of fear building deep within me. There was an edge to his voice that reminded me so much of James at the moment. That thought alone, was enough to make me quake. I hoped I wouldn't see James again. I wished Felix had done him sufficient damage to keep him out of my way for some time.

Suddenly, there was a jolt that ran through me, pitching me forward onto the cold, hard floor. I rode out the pain that seared through me. In a strange way, it was comforting...something that I was used to. The pain was the only thing that remained constant in this hell hole, and I needed something to anchor me. It was a point of reference. I blocked out the voices around me as I regained my ability to breathe normally. Shortly after, I was brought back myself and to my knees, waiting for further orders.

I seemed to be waiting for hours, but it must have only been moments before I felt strong arms grasping mine, dragging me to my feet. Felix guided me out of the cell and through the corridors. We paused only once before we got to the bottom of the stairs. I knew what would happen, but I still felt my heart start to pound against my chest as the panic began to build.

Once the hood was placed over my head, I started to center myself and take calming breaths. There really wasn't any point getting myself worked up. A hood over my head was probably going to be the least of my worries before tonight was over.

I was lead outside and to the van. It was the same routine as before. The loud metallic sound of the doors being closed made me jump slightly. The darkness enveloped me and I could smell bleach which made me want to wretch. Just knowing that this was where the body had been with me last time I was here.

The movement of the vehicle, made me lose my balance slightly and I struggled to remain seated as we sped to where ever it was that I was to fight this evening. The journey gave me time to think. I wondered when the letter would be given to my father. _Would Dr. Gerandy_ _give it to him directly, or would he just leave it in his office?_ I thought just leaving it would be the best option. That would ensure that his involvement with this psychopath would be kept secret. I debated the reason he became embroiled in such a shady world. I knew I would probably never find out.

Wherever tonight's venue was, it seemed to be taking a long time and from what I could tell, we were travelling out of whatever city I was in. It felt like we were on a freeway, but where we were going, I couldn't tell. With the combination of the vibration of the vehicle and the silence, I fell asleep.

I was brought back from such a wonderful dream by the van door being jerked open. The dream was one I would remember as I got to hold Bella again. I told her how much I loved her before I begged for forgiveness. She had been just about to answer me when I was so rudely brought out of my reverie. "C'mon Cullen, you know the drill." It was Felix's voice that I heard. My immediate reaction was to obey. I had been shown a side of him earlier that I didn't want to come face to face with again anytime soon.

Scrambling out of the vehicle, I was grabbed and led to where I was needed. Once there, Felix only spoke a single word to me. It was nothing more but than what I needed. "Kneel."

I obeyed his command without any thought. I heard laughter from others in the room, and I turned my head from side to side, wanting to know who was here.

"Now, now, you know what curiosity did to the cat, don't you?" A voice, that I didn't recognize, spoke slowly and I could hear footsteps as they circled me. I wasn't sure if I was expected to respond or not, so decided to play it safe and say nothing.

"It seems that your pet here has lost his ability to speak." The hood over my head was ripped off and as my eyes became accustomed to the light. I saw the tall figure of a man standing over me, the hood remained in his clasped hands as he stared at me. Suddenly, he threw the fabric to one side before he grabbed my jaw, forcing my mouth to open as he looked inside. "Oh! My mistake, he does have a tongue." He pushed me away and I struggled to keep my balance, pitching forward. My hands outstretched to stop me falling on my face.

"Caius, enough!" The voice sent a chill through me. It was Aro. I looked up at the person I now knew to be Caius and he was standing proudly staring at him. I watched in interest as this person didn't seem to be afraid of him at all. "You know better than to interfere with what is mine." He laughed at his own humor. "That's a lesson that Mr. Cullen here, is learning...the hard way."

I heard a sharp intake of breath and the man crouched down in front of me. "You touched his property? You're a brave man. I made that mistake once. Trust me, when I say I won't make the same mistake twice." He then proceeded to turn his face to the right, exposing a scar that ran down the side of his face. His fingers traced the scar and I could only imagine how painful that would have been.

Aro laughed. "Brother, Dearest, you know that had I wanted you punished properly, I would have killed you. That was merely a warning."

Keeping my shock at this revelation under some form of control, I was shocked that they were brothers. They were complete opposites of each other.

Caius observed me closely before he spoke again. "So, you're the one, then. You're lucky to be alive after what you did." He turned to Aro. "Or do you intend to kill him?"

I felt panic deep inside me. _After everything would I be killed?_ I closed my eyes, not wanting to hear the answer to that question.

The silence was heavy as I waited to hear what had been decided about my fate...if anything. Part of me wanted to beg him for my life, but I knew that would be pointless.

Aro finally spoke in a low voice. "No…he's repaying a debt and I must admit, that having him here has presented me with a rather unique opportunity to meet the wonderful creature that he saw fit to cheat on. Although, why he would look for anything outside her, is beyond me. Bella is quite charming." He let the final words fall almost into silence. It was hard for me not to react. He had led me to believe that he had been intimate with Bella, and the thought of that, tore me apart. All of this was penance for my sins. Not knowing the truth and having to fight for my life. Swallowing deeply, I ignored the jibes and the way he was trying to coax a reaction from me. I needed to ignore him and remain strong. Knowing he wanted me to react only helped strengthen my resolve.

I finally found my voice. "So, tonight, what're my instructions?"

Aro stared at me; it was almost as if I was speaking a foreign language, so I tried again. "I take it, I'm here to fight. I only ask what you would like me to do tonight. I'll follow your orders, Master."

With that, I bowed my head and waited.

I heard the clapping of hands and I was pulled back to my feet and taken from the room. I didn't fight them; there really was no point. A non-descript door was opened and I was pushed into what appeared to be a locker room, although, it was dirty and looked like it hadn't been used properly, in years. There was a shower area in the corner, but I doubted they would work.

Sitting down on the bench that was there, I waited to be told what to do. Laurent came through the door and stood in front of me. I looked up at him and he smiled. "Tonight Edward, you're to take part in two fights."

He paused and I rushed to speak before he could say more. "Two? Are you fucking kidding me!"

Smiling at me he continued. "Yes, Edward, two fights. You're commanded to win the first, which should be fairly easy as he's a relative newcomer to these events. The second, you're to lose. However, to maximize return you're to fight as if your life depended on it. Then you're to lose when the signal is given. Understood?"

I nodded slowly, not sure how I would be able to pull this off. The one thing I did know was, I had to try.

Laurent left the room briefly, returning with a change of clothes for me and some of the tape to bind my hands for the ordeal ahead. Remaining calm was easier in theory than practice, but I knew I had to continue trying.

I could hear the sounds of the crowds as they gathered. They all changed to the sound of shouts and cheers as I assumed fights were going on before mine. The waiting for me was the hardest part of this and knowing it would soon be my turn to be the person they were screaming at to win or lose. I just needed to keep my head.

Laurent left me alone and as the door opened, the sounds amplified. I brought my hands up, managing to cover my ears to block out some of the noise, despite my shackles. I closed my eyes and rocked back a forth.

Before I knew it, Laurent was standing in front of me and there were a couple of other men stood by the door. "Cullen, it's time for your first fight." He spoke slowly and clearly.

I simply nodded that I understood and standing in front of him, I let out a deep breath before I spoke. "C'mon then. Let's get this done." With that, I walked to the henchmen and quirked my herd to the side. "So, are you gonna take me down there then?"

Laurent put his hand on my shoulder. "We need to remove your cuffs first." I turned to face him, holding my hands up so he could un-cuff me. With that, we made our way out toward the baying crowd.

I kept facing forward, not looking at the assembled crowd. I didn't want to acknowledge them and see how many people were there. We made our way through the people as they moved apart to allow us to pass. Then we were standing at the edge of an empty swimming pool. I realized it was being used as a fight pit. There was a fight still on-going as we climbed down the metal ladder and toward Felix, who was waiting for us.

He nodded at Laurent before he turned his attention to me. "You know what you have to do Cullen. Master is here, so don't think of disobeying or trying to alert anyone. I'll snap your neck before anyone heard your pathetic cries for help. Do you doubt me?" I shook my head; I knew he meant every word that he said. "Good. Now, this fight will be over soon, and you're up next. Remember, you need to win this one."

I finally managed to find my voice. "I understand completely."

Felix simply smiled and stepped over to talk to some of the other men that were standing nearby. I managed to glance around at my surroundings. The space was deep and not as big as a normal pool. I could see where there were diving platforms at one end, so I guessed that this was a diving pool. It would explain the depth and size; it seemed to be a perfect set up. The fight could be viewed easily and it was also kept away from the crowd so there couldn't be any outside interference.

The noise from the crowd became deafening and then it eased off. There were slips of paper floating down from above me like a ticker tape parade. I guessed the fight they were betting on was now over. That only meant one thing...I was up next.

Once the fighters were led away, I was taken by Felix to one side. "You better be ready. There'll be no assistance for you tonight."

With that, he walked away, leaving me standing speechless after him. He had just confirmed what I had thought; someone had done something to help me win that first fight. Hopefully, I would be strong enough to do this on my own. These thoughts were soon brushed aside as Laurent guided me to the center of the space toward the man who seemed to be overseeing the fights.

He looked me over before nodding to Laurent who stepped away. Another man stepped, confidently, forward and stretched out his hand to me. I looked to it with uncertainty before I shook it. The referee went over what he expected from us. It was the same as last time; clean fight was the main thing.

The noise of the crowd became deafening as they knew the fight was due to start. Adrenalin coursed through me as the man opposite me was sizing me up. Taking in his size and build, I thought this would be an easy fight.

I was caught slightly off guard when he rushed me, screaming at the top of his voice. Obviously the fight had started and I had been too busy thinking how easy this would be. He almost knocked me off my feet with the force of his attack, but I managed to find my balance and pushed him back before I swung my right fist, which made contact with his jaw. I watched as he fell to the ground. _Oh, this was definitely going to be easy._

If I had thought the noise from the crowd was loud before, it became deafening. Walking over to where he lay, I could see the fear in his eyes. Then, I realized he was a little more than a child. There was no way I could let this interfere with what I had to do. I had been commanded to win, and win I would.

Offering my hand to my opponent was a gesture that he clearly didn't expect, and the crowd fell into near silence. He took it and I pulled him back to his feet. The smile that broke out on his face, made me feel guilty for what I had to do to him, but there was no way I could lose.

We separated and he made several attempts to punch and kick me, and he was quick in his attacks. He was almost too quick. What he lacked in size and experience, he more than made up for in speed and tenacity, but we weren't evenly matched. Felix had taught me well, and my survival instinct was firing me up, so I attacked.

Minutes later, my opponent was lying on the ground, covered in blood. My heart leapt when he didn't move for a moment. It took my mind back to the motionless body in the van. I didn't want to be the one to end his life; he was nothing more than a child mixed up in a world inhabited by thugs. He certainly didn't deserve to die here at my hand or anyone else's. Whatever shit he was in, he needed to get out and quickly.

I was declared the winner, and a huge cheer rang out. I had carried out my orders. Now I knew why I had to lose the second fight. Aro would be betting against me. My win now, would mean people would bet on me to win, and my losing would mean he would win big because it wasn't expected.

Laurent came back into the sunken pit area and led me away. Felix was soon at his side and the other henchmen were busy clearing a path through the crowd for me. It seemed I was popular. People wanted to congratulate me, but they weren't allowed to get that close.

Once we were back in the changing room, I sat down, rubbing my hands over my face. Felix spoke in a low voice. "Well done. Cullen. You've done well so far. Then again, it wasn't really a fair fight."

With that he left then Laurent stepped forward. "You did well, but make no mistake, the next opponent won't be that easy to overcome. He's more seasoned in this world. It should be a more evenly matched fight. Don't forget though, you're to lose that fight when the signal is given and not before."

I let out a deep breath. "I know what I have to do. How long before I'm up?"

Laurent looked at his watch. "Thirty minutes or so." He thrust a bottle of water into my hand. "Drink this."

I eyed the bottle cautiously, causing him to laugh. "It's sealed. There wasn't any tampering taken place."

Nodding, I drank from the bottle until it was empty. I looked at Laurent who merely smiled at me. Then...we waited.

Time seemed to drag on forever, and I grew impatient for the next fight to win. The adrenaline was coursing through my body because I knew each fight was one less that I would have to endure until I secured my freedom. That thought alone, kept me sane because knowing I would be out of here and this would all be a distant, if not, wholly unpleasant memory.

The door opened and Felix peered around it. "Time for round two, Cullen." I nodded before I got to my feet and waited to be led back to the empty pool. This time, instead of looking straight ahead, I decided to look at the men that were gathered here for this sick sport.

I was surprised to find that they were of varying ages and backgrounds. A real mixture of men dressed in everything from jeans to some who looked like they had stepped straight out of a business meeting in their suits_. How could such a world exist and yet be so well_ _hidden from the normal man on the street?_ I had no time to pursue this thought any further as we reached the edge of the pool.

Climbing down the ladder once again, I saw my opponent for the first time. He was a tall, slim built man. He didn't look like he was much of a fighter, but I learned never to judge a book by its cover.

He stared at me, obviously trying to size me up, and I returned his stare. We ended up standing toe to toe and I could feel his breath on me. I knew I should show no fear to him; he would use it against me.

Then, without any further warning, a whistle was blown and the fight started.

We circled each other, both trying to find a weak spot. We were looking for a place to start our attack, but neither of us wanted to give anything away. He made a grab for me and I ducked out of his way. This seemed to spur him on and I was delivered a kick, which swept my feet out from under me. I hit the deck and quickly scrambled back to my feet. A smile broke out on his face as he continued to try and find way to bring me down.

The fight seemed pretty evenly matched as we both managed to land blows, but nothing did any real damage. The crowd sensed that they were in for a good fight and the tension and excitement was being generated by them, filtered down to us, spurring us on.

He landed several good blows, in succession, to my head and torso. I couldn't help going down on the ground, again. I grabbed my ribs; sure that he had cracked one. I watched as he closed the distance between us and stood over me. He landed a kick to my stomach that winded me and I struggled to breathe. This fight wasn't going how they had wanted it to, and I knew that even though this was out of my control, it would be seen as disobedience and punished.

My opponent turned around to take the cheers from the crowd and I managed to somehow get to my knees. It was painful to breathe and I was trying to get to my feet when a claxon sounded, silencing the crowd. Then a solitary voice shouted through the quiet.

"We've been busted! Police are here… Run!"

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><p><strong>Authors Note:<strong>  
>Beta'd as always by Dreamofrob 10, Pre-read by Shaz Warner – welcome to 'Team Taken' and thanks a million for your help with this, it really is appreciated.<p>

THANK YOU to everyone who voted for me, Taken came SECOND in the Energize WIP awards. WOW I am blown away that people love this.


	21. Aftermath

**Disclaimer: I of course do not own – no copyright infringement is intended**

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><p>I froze, the Police were here? I was torn between being happy and petrified. If I was found then I would be back with Bella and my family and my nightmare would be over, but the other part of me wondered how far Aro's reach extended. If he was locked up, would I have to testify against him? If I did, would they be able to guarantee my families safety? These questions would have to wait; I needed to be found first.<p>

Watching as the people gathered around the edge of the pool vanished. The shouts and panic as they left, gave me comfort. I managed to make my way to the wall where I pressed my back against the cold, hard surface. I closed my eyes and waited for my rescue.

My arm was grabbed and my eyes opened, expecting to see a Police officer in front of me, but no, it was Laurent.

"We need to get out of here, now. Come with me," he hissed. I didn't move and he turned to stare at me. "Cullen, you need to move!"

I shook my head slowly, denying his demand. I couldn't find the words. The look on his face said that he wasn't taking in my reaction. Managing to find the strength from somewhere, I uttered, "No."

Instinctively, I moved away from Laurent, but he took a step toward me. I kept moving, but it was no use as I found myself in a corner. He raised his hands to me, showing that he meant me no harm. His mouth opened, but whatever he was going to say was drowned out by a much louder, deeper voice that struck fear into me. It was Felix, "Laurent! What're you fucking around for? You know that we've to get outta here. Master has already gone ahead. We just need to get Cullen outta of here." He paused for a moment, looking between the pair of us, quizzically. In that moment, I realized that any hope I had of getting out of here, were fruitless. "Is there a problem down here?"

Laurent looked directly at me, and I closed my eyes in acknowledgement that I had no choice, so I held my wrists out to be cuffed. Laurent grabbed my left wrist and dragged me toward the steps. Tonight wasn't going to be the night that I saw freedom. Once again…my heart sank.

Once we were out of the pool, Felix indicated that we should follow him, so without question, we did. He led us through corridors and eventually we reached a fire door. He opened it slowly, checking if there was no one waiting for us before he sprinted across to an SUV that was parked, waiting for us. Once he had the engine started, he indicated for us to join him. I was pushed into the back and told to stay down. Laurent jumped into the passenger seat and we sped away.

The journey back to Aro's place was longer than I remembered, but then, I guessed we were taking a different route back to try and avoid any Police interference. Eventually, the car slowed and I heard Felix speaking into an intercom, assuming we were back at Volterra.

However, I was wrong. When the car stopped, the door was opened and I was pulled out of the back and ushered into a building. I was aggressively pushed down a set of stairs and into a basement. There was no lighting, so I had no idea what might've be down there. I sat on the ground and waited.

I could hear raised voices and knew that I wasn't at Volterra. That only made me wonder where they had taken me. So where was I? They obviously weren't worried about me seeing anything there; either that or they were too panicked following the raid.

The door at the top of the stairs opened, flooding the small room with light and hurting my eyes. Instinctively, I backed into a corner, pulling my knees up to my chin and bowing my head. A tall man stood in front of me, and I peered at him before he threw a paper bag on the ground in front of me speaking in a heavily accented voice. "Make the most of that. Right now, you are the least of our concerns." With that, he turned and left.

The thought did cross my mind, and wondered if they remembered I was down here, un-cuffed and not restrained? Whatever was happening up there must be serious.

Voices continued to sound. Nothing that was said was clear enough for me to hear what was being said, but I knew something major had happened. I didn't expect the fights got raided often, but at least they had a plan to get out, which I wished that they didn't. I could be sitting in a warm Police station drinking coffee and waiting to be reunited with my family and Bella. In that case, I wouldn't be sitting in a cold, damp basement wondering what the hell was gonna happen to me next.

The noises from upstairs, continued. Different voices were shouting, and then came minutes of calmness. No noise, nothing at all. That scared me more than anything. The silence couldn't be good.

I eventually plucked up the courage to go to the bottom of the stairs, pausing before I climbed them slowly but surely. Once at the top, there was a door. I expected it to be closed, but when I tried the handle, it turned easily in my hand. Pushing the door slowly ajar, I put my head around it, seeing no one in the hallway, so I stepped out.

I had expected someone, anyone to come along and find me, but no one did. I continued to make my way down the hallway, keeping my back to the wall. My heart was pounding heavily in my chest and my breath was shallow and nervous. Then I heard voices in the room at the end of the hallway. I could hear Aro and Felix talking in raised voices, then footsteps got closer and closer to the door and I froze_. Where could I hide here?_

Looking around, I saw that the window at the end of the hallway was covered in floor length, heavy velvet curtains, so I made a dash for them, hiding behind one just in time as the door opened. I heard the Aro call out to Felix. "Make sure any loose ends are tied up. Do what you have to. I don't care what it takes."

There was no response from Felix. All I heard was the door closing and his footsteps retreating down the hallway. I needed to get out of here before my absence was discovered. But, could I go back to being his prisoner when this chance had presented itself to me so perfectly? As I stood hidden behind the curtain, I decided that I should at least try.

Peering out, I made sure there was no one in the hallway before I turned to fumble with the window latch. Much to my surprise, it wasn't locked, allowing me to open it fully. I lowered myself, cautiously, to the ground, and once I realized I was out of the house, I crouched down and collected my thoughts, looking around to see where I was.

I was on the edge of a large grassy area, and just beyond that, there were trees that looked like a small forest. That would be where I needed to go. I could hide in the trees as long as they hadn't discovered I was missing until daybreak. Then I would be able to see where I was going.

A final glance around, told me there was nobody near and I ran as fast as possible toward the trees, not pausing for a single second until I was hidden in them. Once I was sure I was far enough away, I slumped against a tree, catching my breath before I would set off again.

Wandering through the trees, it felt like I would never make it through them. They were so dense in places that I couldn't see a way through. Branches scraped and gouged my skin, but I didn't stop. I refused considering I was this close to the freedom that I craved.

Exhaustion pulled at me, wanting me to stop, but I knew that I couldn't. Continuing to make my way through the undergrowth, I saw some lights up ahead. It looked like civilization and my heart began to soar. Finally, I would be free.

The lights that I saw, spurred me on and I ran through the final trees, seeing a small wooden cabin with lights blazing from the windows. Once I was there, I pounded on the door with both my fists until a middle aged man opened it. The look of shock on his face told me I looked a distraught.

All I could mutter before I collapsed on my knees was, "Help me, please?"

The man helped me back to my feet and led me inside where he settled me down on a couch. I began to shake, adrenalin leaving me and shock moving in. I couldn't believe I was free at last. I watched as he left the room, coming back with a bottle of liquor and a glass. Without speaking, he handed me the glass and poured some of the amber liquid into it.

"Drink, it'll warm you up." With that, he left the room. I didn't give it another thought; I downed the liquid and felt the burn as it went down my throat. The room swam in front of me as I tried to stand, but fell back onto the couch. The man appeared in the doorway, and I could hear him speaking to someone. I thought he was on a phone, but I couldn't focus enough to see clearly.

Trying to get my words out was a struggle and somehow, I managed to utter, "What've you done to me?"

He never answered, only turning and walking away from me, leaving me struggling to make the fuzzy feeling leave me as I fought to stay conscious.

I must've passed out because suddenly, I was writhing in pain, but couldn't move my arms and I wondered what was wrong with them. Once the pain subsided, my eyes searched the room that I now recognized as being the basement at the house I had escaped from and my heart sank. I realized the reason that I couldn't move. My arms were outstretched above my head, and bound to one of the ceiling beams. Then a familiar laugh caught my attention, and my eyes snapped to who I was hoping least to see...Felix.

His face carried a grin as I looked at him and then around the room. "Ah, Cullen, you're back with us. Now that you're back where you belong, I can let Master know. He can't wait to see you."

I struggled against my bindings, knowing that it was fruitless, but I needed to try. That caused Felix to laugh deeply. "Struggle all you want, you won't be escaping, again. That was an oversight."

With that, he turned and left the room. I heard sounds behind me and worried about who else was down here with me. Managing to turn around slightly, I saw someone on the floor and they were trying to sit upright.

"Who are you?" I asked, only to be greeted by mumbling. I squinted into the darkness and I gasped as my eyes focused and they turned their head to me. It was the young man from the first fight. He was now down here with me. _Was he one of Aro's fighters? Why did I not know this? _

He turned toward me, groaning as he did. "Where am I?"

I laughed. "You can't play games with me. You know where you are, don't try to fool me."

He winced as he got to his feet. "I'm not doing anything. Why do you not believe me?" Staggering toward me, I saw just how beaten up he was. Some of the wounds I inflicted, but the others, where had they come from? I knew that not all those bruises and cuts were from my hand.

The door opened and heavy footsteps came down the stairs. There was nothing I could do other than wait to see who it was. Felix was followed by a couple of henchmen, and then he stepped aside, revealing Aro standing behind him. Instinctively, I bowed my head. Strange how quickly this act of respect was ingrained into me. They stood in the center of the space, and I knew I would have some payback for my escape attempt despite the fact that it failed so miserably.

Aro spoke in a low voice. "So, what do we have here? An escapee and someone who has crossed me? Both actions need to be punished."

My head snapped up and I shouted. "I haven't crossed you!" He simply held up his hand, indicating that I should be silent, but I didn't care. "I haven't done anything, I…" The words died in my throat as Felix punched me hard in the gut, winding me. I coughed, trying to catch my breath, and then the familiarity of my normal punishment, flooded through me. My body tensed and relaxed as they stopped the electrical current before starting it again. The only sound that came from me, were the screams of pain.

Aro took a step toward me as I relaxed following the last surge. "Who said that this was all about you, Cullen?" He spat. "Have you not seen your friend here? He's the one who betrayed me. You? Well, you'll be dealt with. I'm more interested in what your little friend here has to say." He was so close to my face that I could feel his breath as he stood in front of me. I closed my eyes, not wanting to see what hatred was held in his. "Take him." He snapped. I braced myself expecting my restraints to be loosened. Instead, I heard the shouts and screams of the man that was with me as he was taken away.

I opened my eyes slowly, and jolted in surprise that Aro was still there in front of me. "You, Cullen, I'll be back for." With that, he turned and left. I took a couple of deep breaths, wondering what they were planning to do with me.

My arms were getting tired as was the rest of me while I waited for them to return. I was surprised when someone came into the basement and let me down from my position; however, any hope I had that I would be allowed to remain unrestrained, were dashed as they ensured that I remained handcuffed. These were attached by a short length of rope through a large metal hoop that hung from the wall. My position was improved, although, I had to remain sitting upright, so I rested back against the wall. Tiredness consumed me and I couldn't remain awake, so I slept.

I was brought out of my slumber by voices coming into the basement. I made myself as small as possible, knowing full well that this would make no difference. If they had come for me, then there would be little that I could do to stop them.

Watching in horror, they threw the lifeless body of the young man onto the floor before turning to leave. He was just out of my reach, so I had to settle for talking to him.

"Hey! Hey!" I called, and there was no response. I could see that he was breathing, although, it seemed shallow. His face was covered in blood and looked a mess. I knew from personal experience that the guards could be brutal, and if he came up against Felix, he would be certainly feeling like he had been hit by a freight train.

I waited for him to show signs of coming around. I eventually allowed myself to rest when it became clear that this would take some time. When I woke, my eyes searched for him, and I was shocked to find that he wasn't there. Panic rushed through me. How had I managed to sleep through that? My thoughts were brought back to my own dilemma as Felix appeared in front of me.

"Cullen, Master wants to see you." He said as my blood turned to ice in my veins. All I could do was wait until he freed my restraints and led me upstairs toward the room that I had heard them in before.

Once we were inside, I saw that Aro was seated, talking on the phone. He seemingly ignored my presence as he continued his conversation. Felix placed one hand on my shoulder and the other was spread at the base of my throat. Whoever Aro was speaking to, was obviously being charmed by him as I listened to his side of the conversation.

"Yes, that sounds fabulous. You really do have a wonderful eye for detail… Perfect!... I will transfer the funds as agreed to secure your services and when could you start?... I appreciate that and I will come along and see you there, shall we say the day after tomorrow?... Bellisimo! Oh, you have made me very happy agreeing to this Mrs. Cullen… Sorry, Esme." At that point, he looked at me, a smile playing on his lips. I opened my mouth to speak, but Felix's hand tightened his hold on my throat, constricting it. Aro waved his index finger at me.

He then laughed into the phone. "I must find a way to thank Bella for introducing you to me, and I look forward to having those awful memories wiped out of my penthouse when you've finished working your magic on it… Goodbye for now, Esme."

He ended the call, his eyes never leaving my face as he watched my look of horror as I realized that he had been talking to my mom, and Bella had made the introduction.

"Ah, Mr. Cullen, how nice of you to join me." With that, Felix pushed me down onto my knees.

"What do you want with my mom?" I hissed.

"I've engaged her services to redecorate my penthouse. You remember how outdated that place was, don't you?" He was goading me, reminding me of my night there with Heidi. "Well, I decided that I should employ an interior designer and Bella quite kindly told me about your mother when I told her of my plans over dinner."

I could feel the rage building inside me. He had been out with Bella, again. She had, unknowingly, brought my mom into this monsters circle. It was hard to keep the emotion from my face.

"Leave her out of this, you sick bastard." I muttered.

Aro's fist made contact with the desk. "No! I will do what I please, Cullen. You have to understand that I can get to anyone I choose. Any member of your family is within my reach. Your brother, Emmett? I might employ him as my bodyguard, although, I have no need for one. Carlisle, your father? I could easily approach insisting I need a new doctor. The old one is no longer able to offer me his services. However, your father is a highly ethical man, so I would need to find a way to… persuade him."

I knew Aro wanted a reaction from me. He wanted to be able to punish me for that, so I couldn't let him win. "You have me. Please leave my family out of this. They haven't done anything to you; it's me that you wish to punish." The words came out almost in a whisper.

"I know I have you, except when you decided to venture outside earlier. Never underestimate my reach. You disobey me again, and I'll not hesitate to kill a member of your family. Their blood will be on your hands."

I was pulled back to my feet by Felix and I struggled against his hold, which was futile, as I was led back to the basement. As we reached the bottom of the stairs, I saw a moment out of the corner of my eye. I was pitched forward as Felix reacted instantly. Taking the person in his grasp, I heard a sickening noise as he snapped the boys neck and he fell to the ground.

Screaming in horror at what I had just seen caused Felix some amusement. He moved to the bottom of the stairs and shouted, "I need a clean-up down here." Turning back to me, he sneered as he finished his sentence. "Just one, for now." With that he left.

I curled up in a corner, and sat rocking as I stared at the lifeless body in front of me. How easily they took a life, and how little regard they had for life. Surprisingly, quickly a couple of men came down and took the body away. Once they were out, more footsteps came toward me; I remained in my huddled position, refusing to make eye contact. I jerked as I felt a hand touch me.

My eyes then darted to the face of Laurent. "Edward, I've come to see if you're okay."

I looked away, tears filling my eyes; this wasn't to deter Laurent. As he spoke, again in a soft voice. "Look, I know that you're probably in shock. Felix shouldn't have done that, especially not in front of you."

My eyes snapped to his and I spat my words out. "You think? Fuck! So if they had taken him out and done it, that would have been okay, then?" The words hung heavily, unanswered so I continued. "He was nothing more than a child. What exactly had he done?"

Laurent sighed. "I can't tell you, but think back to what happened tonight."

My brain raced to think what had occurred earlier. I pieced a possibility together, so I voiced it. "He snitched to the Police?"

Laurent nodded slowly. "That's what's suspected. Luckily, we have contacts within the Police and we were aware that this might happen, so we were prepared."

I nodded slowly. "Where are we?"

He smiled at me. "That I can't tell you either, other than this is a safe place for us until we can return to Volterra. I suggest that you rest. Your escape attempt was bold, and I can't blame you for trying. It was just unfortunate that you chose a house of a person on our payroll. He's being handsomely rewarded for not allowing you to escape." He turned to leave and paused just before he did. "Rest, we'll be returning to Volterra, soon and you're to be punished, once there."

I nodded slowly, knowing that whatever the punishment was, I would need to take it, especially now that my family were being slowly pulled into Aro's reach. I wondered if my message had reached my father. _Had Doc been able to deliver it?_ Then I remembered something that Aro had said about needing a new Doctor. _He couldn't be, could he?_

"Laurent!" I called, unsure if he would hear me. My thought was answered when he reappeared with a questioning look on his face. "The Doctor? Something was said about him. Is he okay?" The look on his face told me everything that I needed to know.

I mumbled. "What happened to him?"

He looked thoughtful as if choosing his words carefully. "He was attacked as he was going into the hospital. He was fatally stabbed."

I couldn't speak. The words simply wouldn't come. Laurent turned and left me alone with my thoughts.

Doctor Gerandy was dead. There was no doubt in my mind that this was directly linked to the message that he was trying to pass to my father. His blood was on my hands. How could I live with that?

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><p><strong>Authors<strong> **Notes:**

Well this is dedicated to one of my avid readers, Pamela – HAPPY BIRTHDAY! Hope you have had a fab day x

Beta'd as always by Dreamof Rob10, pre-read by Shaz Warner – thanks to both of you.

Hope that you enjoyed this and please do let me know! Steph (DreamofRob10) told me

Great chapter. Aro is a ruthless S.O.B. I knew that cabin had to be a bad idea. He should have kept running, but I guess when you're not able to think straight, anything you do, might be the wrong thing.

Chapter read through and beta'd...check

Loved the chapter...check

File attached...check***** ( I forget to attach files when I send them)

Hitting the send button...check

She made me smile with that! It's a running joke as I forget to attach files when I send her emails and vice versa – we make a great pair!

Until next time!


	22. Return To Hell

**Disclaimer: I don't own these characters and no copyright infringement is intended.**

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><p>Eventually they came for me and I was compliant; there was no point fighting them. They gave me a shot of something to make me drowsy before we left. I struggled to stay awake, but to no avail, I did my best. The journey was long, although, I had no idea of the time or where we were going thanks to the sedative in my system. Once back at Volterra, I was dragged back to the familiar cell that had become my home. I was dumped on the hard bed and my eyes were struggling to focus on anything when Felix stepped into my line of vision.<p>

"Cullen, nice to see you back where you belong. Now, come with me."

He motioned for me to follow him, and I struggled to my feet, still feeling drowsy. The response was for him to laugh before he grabbed me, leading me away. We walked into the room where I had written my letters. I was forced into a chair, my hands bound to the arms. I was left alone with only my thoughts as I wondered what they would do to me. Hoping I wouldn't have to wait long. I thought the fear would cause me to pass out, it was the waiting that was the worst part, or so I thought.

Felix swept back into the room, glancing at a camera in the corner of the room before he turned to me, a smile playing at his lips. My heart started to pound heavily in my chest as he stepped in front of me, blocking my view. I heard the door open and close, but wasn't sure who it was that had come into the room. He chuckled and stepped aside, revealing James standing behind him. To my horror he then turned and left the room, leaving the two of use alone.

The sneer that played on his lips sent a chill through me. I knew what a sadistic fucker he could be, and I wondered why he was here. He walked toward me, and I could see he had bruises that were still to fade and cuts that were healing. There was a slight limp to his walk, telling me that though he gave all the bravado of being okay, he was far from it. I could only imagine the injuries that Felix inflicted on him. I saw him when he was being dragged away, and I was shocked to see him here in front of me now. As he stood in front of me he leaned over me, his breath hot on my face as I tried my hardest not to flinch.

"Cullen, finally, I get to see you one on one. I've dreamed I'd get this chance to repay you for the beating that I took," he said, sneering right in my face.

Panic ripped through me and I tried to remain calm on the surface. "You deserved it," I said in a calm voice that didn't relay how I really felt.

"Fucker!" The scream from him was so loud before his voice dropped to the low and menacing tone that I associated with him. "Now you're here, waiting for your punishment. How fitting that it's me that gets to inflict it on you."

I struggled to get free from my bindings, although what good it would do me, I didn't know, as I was locked in a room with a madman who clearly wanted revenge.

"Tut-Tut. You know better than to think that you wouldn't be properly restrained here." He paused before slowly circling the chair, staring at me intently. "Hmm... now what to do with you?" He paused behind me, so I turned to try and see him, but I couldn't. Then I felt something cold against my throat. It took a second for me to work out what it was, and instantly froze. It was a blade. I doubted very much that he would slit my throat, but did wonder what he could get away with now that we were alone. He laughed as he danced the blade over my throat. Then he was standing in front me, moving the blade away from my throat, teasing me with it; ensuring I would see it. It was a double blade, and it glinted in the overhead lights.

The cold steel pressed against my cheek; the tip resting next to my right eye. James found the whole thing amusing, which didn't surprise me. The blade sat flat against my skin until he suddenly turned it onto its edge and began to draw it down my cheek. At first I hadn't realized he had broken the skin until I felt the tickle of blood as it ran down my cheek. Then, he pulled the blade away and clearly into my line of sight. He was, quite obviously, enjoying having some power over me. He turned the knife over, marvelling at the blade and the blood that was on it. I tried to pull away from him, continuing to struggle against my restraints. It was hopeless though, and it only served to amuse James further as he laughed darkly as my reaction.

"I have all of forever to do this to you, Cullen, and I've been so looking forward to seeing you again."

Letting out a deep sigh, I closed my eyes, but not for long as he grasped my chin and sneered in my face. "Don't you fucking dare look away from me!" He released his hold sharply, causing my head to snap to the side. I stared at him, defiance now filling my entire being. He was only doing this because I wasn't able to fight back.

"What's up James? You like that I'm defenceless, do you? Afraid to take me on if I were able to fight back?" I sounded far braver than I felt, as he stared at me. I knew he was trying to work out what to do next, and then he came toward me with the knife, pressing the tip to my throat. I could feel the point as it almost broke the skin.

"I could, so easily, just slit your throat. No one would know, or even care that you were gone permanently. I'm sure your whore wouldn't miss you. She isn't so far, that's for sure."

Staring at him, I wondered who he meant. Heidi was nothing to me other than a mistake; one I was paying for dearly now. "She means nothing to me, she never did." I spat the words as if they were pure poison.

James simply laughed. "Oh, how little you think of her. Here I was thinking you actually loved her... my mistake."

Staring at him, my brow furrowed in confusion, I answered him. "Heidi? She was the biggest fucking mistake of my life."

I watched as he laughed, throwing his head back before he regained eye contact with me. I saw them darken slightly as they bored into me. "Did I say her? No, we all know that she's a whore. Maybe I need to clarify considering there are so obviously so many whores in your pathetic, miserable excuse for a life." He paused, a smile pulling at the corners of his mouth just before he spoke again. His eyes sparked with excitement as he spoke words that sent a chill running through me. "I was referring to Bella."

At the mention of Bella, I lost it. "You motherfucker! You are not fit to think her name, let alone breathe it!"

I braced myself, knowing that he would retaliate. I didn't have to wait long. He leaned over me, grabbing hold of my wrists, applying pressure knowing that I could do nothing to stop him. I was shocked when he released my wrists, but the relief was short lived when he grabbed hold of my little finger on my left hand and without taking his eyes from mine, he snapped it backwards. The pain was intense as it shot through me. I screamed out loud, causing him to chuckle again.

"Oh, does that hurt?" He mocked in a teasing tone before his voice dropped, saying, "Good." With that he snapped back the ring and middle finger on the same hand. I screamed again, my head falling backwards as tears rolled down my face, choking through the pain. It was searing, and there was nothing that I could do. I brought my head forward, dropping my chin to my chest as I fought to control my breathing and work through the pain.

He turned away from me, leaning against the wall, running the knife under his fingernails as if he was cleaning them. Eventually he looked over at me, a smile playing at his lips as he spoke, "That was just for starters, Cullen. I can only say how disappointed I am in you." With that, he opened the door to step outside. Pausing, he cocked his head to one side as he sneered. "I thought you would be less of a screamer than your sister…shame really."

He watched as my face fell in recognition of what he had just said, before he threw his head back and laughed as he slammed the door behind him. My mind raced at a million miles an hour. _How did he know about Alice?_ _What did he mean about her screaming?_ _Was she_ _hurt?_ I needed to know.

The pain in my fingers was the least of my concerns. I needed to know if Alice was okay. If he had laid one solitary finger on her, I would snap every one of his putrid appendages, as he had just snapped mine. My thoughts were interrupted when the door swung open and a couple of men, that I didn't know by name, but recognized as being henchmen, came into the room. They walked over to me, cutting the bindings loose, but held onto an arm each, before they bound my hands in front of me. They dragged me to my feet and from the room.

We made our way through the maze of corridors before I was led outside. There was a chill in the air and I shivered. They took me to the rear of the property and through a line of trees where they led me into an out building that looked like a barn. I saw a rope suspended from one of the beams in the center. I feared that this would be the last thing I would ever see. I began to struggle frantically against them, but they were stronger than me.

Mentally, I prepared myself, as they stood on either side of me, holding me. Then I saw Felix step into view. "Ah…Mr. Cullen, I see James left you relatively unharmed. Nice to see he can obey some orders." He snickered to himself before stepping closer to me. Once he was standing in front of me, he grabbed my face, turning it to see the marks inflicted by James. He grasped my bound hands, causing me to scream out in pain. This made Felix laugh. "Old habits die hard with James. He always was slightly… heavy handed."

I managed to swallow down the remainder of the scream, not wanting to give them one more second of entertainment. I watched as he walked away and toward the rope. He tugged on it, testing, I believed, its suitability for whatever he had planned. Felix motioned for me to be brought forward. Instinctively, I struggled, but was soon standing in from of the rope that hung in front of me.

Felix grabbed my bound wrists, staring deep into my eyes. "You fear death, Cullen?" He asked in a menacing tone. I returned his stare; unable to speak, I slowly shook my head. Felix smiled, nodding before he responded. "You should. Death is no escape." He reached up and grabbed the rope, winding it through the bindings on my wrists. Once he was happy, he motioned to someone that I couldn't see and the rope was pulled upwards, and my hands with it.

My arms stretched above my head, my feet only just remaining on the floor. I was, for all intents and purposes, hanging like a punching bag. I expected blows to be rained down on me, instead I was left alone. This scared me more than anything, to be alone like this, not knowing what would happen to me. I listened to nothing but the sound of the night around me for people that never came.

Eventually, I grew tired. My eyes felt heavy and they started to close. Getting rest would be difficult. _Could I sleep in a standing position?_ I didn't get to test that theory because just as my eyes closed and my head started to drop, a jolt ran through me, causing me to scream out loud. _That fucking belt!_ It wasn't on the highest setting; just enough to bring me back into the world. I looked around and could see no one, so how did they know what was happening here?

I tried to get settled, resigning myself to the fact that I would be here a while. Tiredness would wash over me and just when I would give into it, I found electricity surging through me. My body ached and begged to be allowed to rest, but none was permitted. This was a strange form of punishment, but I knew Aro was certainly never predictable. My fingers throbbed from the pain and I doubted, highly, that medical attention would be allowed to me. Hell, when Emmett busted his fingers growing up, he ended up with his fingers in a splint and then had to have a cast on them because they were busted too badly. Mine? They hurt like a bitch and I knew James enjoyed inflicting that pain on me.

The night was long and dark. I heard the door to the barn open, and my eyes frantically searched into the darkness to see who was there. Calling out brought no response, but I knew deep inside me that someone was there; I just didn't know who.

The sound of footsteps moving around in the darkness, alerted me to their whereabouts, and as much as was possible, I would turn to face in the direction of the noise. But it was pointless because as soon as I turned toward where I thought that they were, I would be struck, hard in the ribs, back, and my legs would be kicked out from under me. The strain on my arms was unbearable until I could get back onto my feet. They didn't attack me relentlessly; it was almost as if they were toying with me. I thought it was James, but I knew there was no way he would be able to resist taunting me. It was hard not to cry out from the pain that was being inflicted, but I didn't want to give the motherfucker any satisfaction from hearing my pain, so I did my best to keep it inside.

Eventually, they must've got bored of my not responding. I wasn't showing any outward fear toward them, causing them to leave me alone. I was pleased at myself. The only sign that I had acknowledged anything was happening to me was, my body's natural response to being attacked. Once I was sure I was alone, I reacted. I screamed in pain, worried that further injuries had been inflicted on me, and that these too, would go untreated.

Daylight broke through the cracks in the wood that formed the barn. My eyes burned from lack of sleep and I was still struggling to keep them open. My whole body was screaming at me, but all I could do was wait to see who would come for me. I wasn't only hungry, but I was thirsty too.

The doors to the barn were flung open, flooding the space with brilliant sunshine. My head snapped up as I squinted, making out three, maybe four figures walking toward me. I must've managed to fall asleep in this position because I was drowsy and felt groggy.

"Mr. Cullen." The deep, familiar tones of Felix drifted through the space. He turned to the men that stood to one side. "Let him down."

I automatically tensed as one of them stood in front of me, while one of the others released the rope from the pulley system. I was spared no mercy as I collapsed onto the floor, my legs no longer having the strength to hold me upright. I could hear their sniggers as I struggled to find my feet. There was no way I could allow myself to be punished for this, but I couldn't stand.

Felix appeared in front of me, taking hold of my chin and pulling my face toward him as he spoke. "You're allowed to rest for a short while. Tonight, you fight again." He turned to the men near me. "Take him back to the house. I need to prepare things for later."

He turned away from us, and my arms were grabbed. I was manhandled and taken back to the main property to the cell that I, now, called home. Once there, I was unceremoniously thrown on the floor. As they left, I managed to drag myself onto the bed, closing my eyes and allowing sleep to claim me.

The rest I had gained was short lived. I awoke gasping for breath and realized that I had ice cold water tossed over me.

My eyes found Felix quickly; his tone was business like as usual. "Come. You're to train before you fight tonight." With that, he turned and left the room. I wasn't given the chance to respond before my arms were grabbed and I was taken from the cell into the training room where Felix waited for me. He indicated that I should begin on the treadmill. I knew better than to disobey, so I began to run. The pain from my broken fingers remained, and I wondered if Felix knew what James had done to me. Then again, why would he care? I was a simple means to an end, as long as I could earn money. That would be all they cared about. _What was a little pain to them?_

Once Felix was satisfied that I was in good enough shape, he sent me back to my cell, telling me I would be collected shortly for the fight and given my orders before we left. That struck me as unusual. Normally I was told once I was at the venue, but there was nothing I could do than, follow their orders.

Exhaustion washed over me once I was alone again. My whole body felt like it was on fire; my eyes burned as I fought to keep them open.

I didn't need to worry that I would lapse into some form of sleep as Laurent stepped into my line of sight. He smiled at me. "Hello, Edward. You know why I'm here." I nodded slowly, falling to my knees and outstretching my hands in front of me. My fingers wouldn't straighten out, but this wasn't something he noticed. The handcuffs were secured around my wrists before I made the, now familiar journey from my cell to the outside world.

Stopping at the door that leads outside, Laurent turned to me and I sighed. "I know, I know. You need to put the hood on." He simply laughed in response before producing it from his pocket. Once it was placed over my head, I was taken outside. The fresh air woke me up slightly, and we seemed to be taking the long route to whatever vehicle they were using. I stumbled on the, slightly uneven, ground causing Laurent to grab me, steadying me before I fell. I needed to know what was happening.

"Can I ask you something?" I almost whispered, taking the silence as an approval. "Where are we going tonight?" He didn't answer, and we just continued to walk. Something was wrong, I just didn't know what.

We halted suddenly and I expected the van door to open, but instead I heard Felix's voice. "This way."

The ground beneath my feet changed to a wooden floor and my mind raced to try and make sense of where I could be. Then I realized we were in the barn that I had been brought to earlier. Fear spiked in me and I wondered if they were going to kill me this time. I froze, unable to move forward. Laurent pulled at my arm causing me to stagger forward before I fell to the ground. Instinctively, I put my hands out flat to break my fall, but this only caused me further pain and I screamed out. Not that they cared in any way shape or form.

I felt arms on me, grabbing me as I was dragged across the floor before I heard another door open. Then I was pulled to stand up straight before the hood was removed. When I could focus my eyes, Felix came into my field of vision. My eyes immediately dropped to the floor, my heart pounding heavily in my chest while I waited for him to speak.

It felt like an eternity before he spoke. "Tonight you fight again. This time on home ground." My eyes snapped to his and he cocked his head to one side, a questioning look on his face. "You will fight here, and you are to win, no excuses, no reprieves. Failure is not an option. Understood?"

I nodded slowly at him, keeping my face as calm as possible. _How was I going to fight with_ _broken fingers?_ I doubted they would care or offer me any medical attention, so I held my tongue and vowed to fight through the pain. I just didn't know how much I would regret that.

I listened intently to the noises that came from outside the room I was in. There were voices, but it all sounded very subdued, nowhere near the level of noise that I was used to. Then I remembered how much smaller the space than the other locations. Soon I found myself being told that it was time for my fight.

Once again, the nerves ripped through me. I knew each fight would test me, push me to the limits, but now I was injured and hadn't said anything. _Would they punish me for that?_ I had no idea, but now wasn't the time for me to worry. Tonight, they told me to win, and orders had to be obeyed regardless.

Once I was ready to fight, Felix led me out and I looked around, noticing the crowd was different. They weren't the normal mixture of people that I had come to expect. They seemed to be more businessmen; they looked wealthier than the normal people I was expected to entertain. I tried not to make eye contact with any of them, after all, I was nothing to them.

Aro was standing off to the side talking to Caius and another man that I hadn't seen before. Feeling the weight of my stare, his eyes cut to me, piercing me as they bored into my soul. I felt uncomfortable but yet, I couldn't bring myself to look away.

Felix pushed me in the back, ending the stare off. When I dared to look at him, he wasn't looking my way. I moved where I was commanded and waited for the inevitable to happen.

The introductions passed in a haze. The guy was a similar height to me. They said his name was Riley. I really didn't want to know his name after what happened to the person in the basement following my escape attempt. If I didn't know his name, I wouldn't think of him as a person. That way if I was to kill him, it wouldn't matter, would it? It was too much to hope that I could switch off entirely, but I needed to cope and that was the only way I could, so I needed force myself to do it.

Riley seemed to be excited about the prospect of fighting tonight. I just couldn't understand why. It seemed alien to me that someone would look forward to beating the life out of another person. I mean, he seemed normal in the scheme of things, especially when you compared him to James; then again, anyone would seem normal alongside him. I had my instructions, and that was to win.

Once the fight started, it became clear that Riley was a worthy opponent. He was fast on his feet and confident which he turned to his advantage. It was like he could anticipate my actions. Then again, I wasn't in top form. I was tired, verging on exhaustion and nursing broken fingers on one hand. It was in my interest to show no weakness, but there was little that I could do to keep to flashes of intense pain from my face. I knew he saw them and a sly grin spread across his lips. The moment I saw this, I knew that I was in trouble.

He ran toward me, pushing me backwards which caused me to lose balance, inducing us to fall to the floor together. I fought him, trying to wrestle him off me, but it was useless. My energy was gone and he ended up straddling me. His arm was across my throat, cutting off my air supply. I clawed at his arms, but my injuries and his pure strength, meant that I was fighting a losing battle. Breathing was a struggle and I thrashed about under him. My eyes were being drawn to where I saw Aro standing. He had an angry look on his face as he turned to Felix. He whispered something into his ear. Felix simply nodded and left, but not before he glared at me. Displeasure was clearly written all over his face.

With what little energy I had left, I fought back. This only encouraged Riley further as he pressed harder down on my throat.

I remembered him whispering into my ear. "I thought it would take more to take you down tonight. James was right; this was easy money for me."

That was the last thing that I heard before I blacked out.

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><p><strong>Authors Note:<strong>

Pre-read by Shaz Warner and Beta'd by DreamofRob 10 – thanks to both you wonderful ladies who keep me sane!

Thanks to everyone who reviewed the last chapter – sorry I have failed majorly as replying, but I do read every single one of them. I love hearing your reactions and know that you are all eager for Edward to be free, and I will be honest with you. The rest of the story is planned in my head I just need to get it down around everything else that I am doing.

Bella's POV is being told under the story Missing, not as far on as this but if you want to know what she thinks, head on over.


	23. Decisions, Decisions - alt POV

**Disclaimer: No copyright infringement is intended.**

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><p>Laurent POV<p>

felt sorry for him as he lay a broken man at my feet. His own foolish choices and a moment of sheer madness had led him to her and her bed, then ultimately it brought him here. I wasn't a heartless bastard, not like my master. He was cold and calculating without any form of conscience or an iota of compassion in him. In fact I would go so far to say that ice ran in his veins and not blood.

To see Edward begging like this before me was hard, he had shown such strength of spirit which had got him into trouble on more than once occasion. Now that seemed to be gone, he had determination to survive this where others had crumbled into dust.

His motivation to live was his girlfriend, Isabella. She was the one he longed to return to, putting this whole nightmare behind him. Deep down I wondered if he would ever realize his dream of freedom or if it would be dashed, ending with him dying here like so many before him. It was not my place to say anything about that to him though.

I had worked at Volterra for many years now, seeing men come and go. Some were willing to fight, taking a share of the winnings. Others were forced through gambling debts or for other reasons. They were treated poorly, little respect was shown to them. As long as they were able to stand and fight that was enough. Once they died, their bodies were disposed of like bags of garbage, of course their bodies were never found.

Edward's sobs continued as I tried to remain aloof, but it was hard. Deep down he was a good man, granted he deserved to be punished for his actions that night but was it our place to decide how? Was his crime that serious that it warranted him facing death? The master had of course been furious when he discovered Heidi's pregnancy. His rage had burned white hot for days. Everyone stayed out of his way for their own safety and protection. Heidi however had not been so lucky.

Violence against women I could never condone, she had however used the apartment to have a night of passion with another man, then finding herself pregnant had assumed it to be Aro's. That was one mistake that I am sure she regretted. He never told her that he wasn't the father, that he couldn't be. He masked his feelings around her, letting her think that all was well. Instead he was planning his revenge on her. The indiscretion was unforgiveable, but as much as he wanted to snap her neck he needed to know who the father was. He wanted the man who has laid hands on what was his to suffer. From what I had witnessed, Master had got his wish.

Heidi and Master were out one night attending the Opera, everything was set and we all knew what our roles were that night. Non compliance was not an option if you wanted to live. Nothing was out of the ordinary that evening, everything was going as it should be. I knew that as I was part of his personal protection detail. Once they left and were standing at the top of the grand staircase, I watched as he gave the signal. Seemingly out of nowhere a large man rushed forward, knocking Master out of the way and grabbing Heidi's purse before he pushed her down the stairs. Of course this man was paid to carry out the act which would seem to anyone like a mugging gone wrong.

Heidi laid broken at the bottom of the staircase as people screamed and rushed to her was first there, publicly playing the concerned partner, had I not known an better I would have believed his outpouring of emotions as he cradled her body in his arms, begging for someone to call for an ambulance.

The baby was lost of course, just as he had wanted and he looked totally innocent. The fall had not been enough to ensure that happened so the doctor at the hospital who owed a large debt to Master ensured that she miscarried, days later he was found dead in his apartment having committed suicide, the guilt had proved too great for him.

Once she was conscious I was posted at her bedside as protection. Master wanted answers as to who the father of the bastard child was, and he always got what he wanted. Heidi was released from hospital and told to rest. Aro at her side assured the doctor's that she wouldn't be leaving the house until he was satisfied she was able to. In other words, he would get the answers he wanted before she would see daylight again.

I saw her only once after she returned, broken and bedraggled she was being escorted from the dungeon out to a waiting van. She begged and pleaded for mercy, for my help. I had turned away valuing my life too much to offer assistance, her fate was sealed.

James, Felix and I were summoned to the Master's office shortly afterwards, his face was thunderous he struggled to say five words. "Edward Cullen, bring him to me."

Those five words had signed the fate of the man slumped on the ground before me. We had found him easily, the hard part was getting him alone so that we would bring him here. Fate had smiled on us when we were at Eclipse one night, he was there with his family. James saw Bella and instantly knew how to play this. He caused a scene on the dance floor by flirting with Bella and not taking no or an answer. Our surveillance had revealed how attached he was to Bella, and when his buttons were pushed, Edward reacted as expected, throwing a punch at James. We had the club security on our side and they agreed to remove him from the club and take him out the rear meaning that we could be waiting for him. He never knew what had hit him as we pounced, grabbing him off the sidewalk and into the back of our van.

That brought us all here. I wanted to help him but was sure that my own life would be forfeit if I was discovered. Taking a deep breath I turned toward him.

"You are asking too much. I have much to lose if this is uncovered. I would pay with my life."

He looked at me, surprise on his face. "You will help me?"

I paused, knowing that the next words that came from my mouth would seal both of our fates. "Yes, I will help you."

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><p><strong>Author's notes:<strong>  
>Any and all mistakes are mine as his is not beta'd. Steph is taking a break right now and I haven't had a chance to get this to my pre-reader either. The idea popped into my head and begged to be written. Hope you enjoyed hearing from Laurent. I have the next chapter ready to go, so watch this space.<p> 


	24. Freedom Beckons

**Disclaimer: No copyright infringement is intended.**

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><p>I could hear noises around me, trying to filter out what I was hearing and the overwhelming thing I heard was shouting and anger. My eyes refused to open and the pain that I felt caused me to fall back into the welcoming arms of the darkness.<p>

Eventually my eyes flickered open and I tried to work out where I was, only able to discern that it was dark and so I guessed that it was my cell. Turning onto my back I let a small groan escape as the pain radiated through every part of my body. Yes I'd known excruciating pain since being here, but nothing on the level that I was experiencing now.

There was a small noise from one side of my cell and I strained to try and see who it was. They remained in the shadows but I knew that they were there. It was just a matter of time until they revealed themselves. The room stayed silent as I tried to work out if anything was broken. It seemed that I was battered, no doubt covered in bruises and cuts but apart from my already broken fingers there didn't seem to be any new injuries for me to be worried about, well, none that I could find.

Relieved that pain reminded me that I was alive, I couldn't work out if this was a good or bad thing. Death would mean that I was free, but the downside to that was that I would never see my family, or Bella again. The only thing that got me through this hell was the thought that one day I would be able to hold her in my arms again, to tell her how much I loved her and eventually I would tell her how sorry I was for putting her through this, but I would have to survive first.

My eyes sought out the person I knew was standing, watching me from the shadows but I couldn't see them clearly. With a voice that struggled to be free I asked. "Who's there? I know you are there. Show yourself."

Breath caught in my throat when they did as I asked, revealing Aro. He had a serious look on his face. I struggled to get down on my knees in front of him, terrified that he would punish me. "I'm sorry. I meant no disrespect sir." I mumbled.

His feet came into my line of sight and I shuddered at the silence that fell over us, it was stifling. If I was to be punished then I wished that he would get on with it.

His feet vanished and I heard the sound of his footsteps as he moved away from me, then he turned quickly and was back in front of me. My chin was held in his grasp, I daren't show any outward sign of pain to this man. He bent down before me bringing his face level with mine.I could see the anger in his eyes and this scared me.

"You lost tonight. Were you told to lose?" He asked in a very calm voice.

"No, I'm sorry master. I was injured, it-" I muttered.

A swift backhand across my face silenced me as he shouted.

"Did I ask for your excuses? If I wanted to hear the pathetic reasons for me losing more money then I would ask you for them. I asked if you were told to lose?"

I was terrified, it would have been better if he had displayed his anger outwardly. Other than the backhand to my face he remained deathly calm.

"No, master." I replied.

"Yes." He sneered. "I am your master and don't you forget it. You have had far too many second chances. Next time you fail to obey my orders, you would do well to make sure that your opponent finishes you off, before I do. Your death at my hands, even if warranted will not be swift."

With that he walked out, leaving me kneeling on the floor. I couldn't move, his words frightened me. I had no doubt that he would carry out the promise he made me. How long I remained there I had no idea, but I flinched when I felt a hand touch my shoulder.

"Edward, it's okay. I'm not going to hurt you." The voice was familiar. I peered at the source.

"Laurent, please just let me die." I sobbed. "If I can't be free then there is no point in me living anymore. The only way out of here for me is death."

"No! You have to have faith Edward. Why would you think such a thing?" He tried to reason with me.

I screamed through the tears. "Because I know! I will never leave here unless I am dead. At least then I would be free from the pain. I can't go on like this, it's too much." Slumping forward once again sobbing and not caring. The emotional walls that I had built up to protect myself here were breached and everything came tumbling out. Laurent remained with me, eventually crouching down in front of me he spoke.

"You need to get through this. You are not the first and you won't be the last to come through here. If you die, someone will replace you. The circle is unending and won't ever be broken. I don't wish to see you dead, but if you feel it's your only option then there is nothing that I can do to help you further." He stood back upright. "The decision is yours, but chose carefully Edward."

As he turned to walk away I reached out, grasping for his leg. "Please Laurent, help me? I will do anything in return, I cannot stay here any longer. I promise you that if I can't escape then I will die here. Swear to me if I die, you will get word to Bella, please don't let her have all these unanswered questions about where I am and what happened to me. I want her to be happy, to move on without me."

Laurent answered. "You are asking too much of me. I have much to lose if my treachery is uncovered. My life, possibly yours would be forfeit."

This gave me a slight glimmer of hope, he hadn't said no. "You will help me?"

He stared at me as if he was weighing up the options available to him, then he spoke the three words I had hoped to hear more than anything. "Yes I will."

Hearing those words from him was like someone telling me I had won the lotto. Even though there was a long way to go, this was the start. I had hope for the first time since I had woken in this rotten stinking hell hole. I scrambled to my feet and threw my arm around him. "Thank you Laurent, I really cannot thank you enough."

He shrugged me off. "Don't thank me. There is a long way to go yet. You really should save any celebrations until you are far away from here and back in the arms of Bella."

I wiped the tears from my face with the back of my hands. "Of course, now when do you think we will be able to plan this for."

He held his hands up to me. "Woah, let's not run before we can walk. I need to find out what plans they have for you in the coming weeks and then see where the best opportunity is. This has to look like you have escaped, there can be no questions raised."

"Okay, I will wait then." I acknowledged and then watched as he left me alone once more.

Days passed where I saw no one other than the shy, timid girl who would bring me food twice a day. She wouldn't look at me, and I would stay as far away from her as possible sensing that she was afraid of me, of what I was capable of. I wouldn't hurt her, she was an innocent. Thoughts of freedom had been running through my mind since I last spoke to Laurent, the only problem was that I hadn't seen him. There was no way that I could ask if he was here, that would arouse suspicion. No, I would have to wait until I saw him again.

My meal was deposited just inside the door and today when I heard her approach, I decided to make it easier for her by laying on the bed and pretending to be asleep. When she left I opened my eyes to check what I thought I had heard. Sure enough my cell door wasn't shut properly. My heart began to race, this seemed too good to be true. Maybe this was arranged by Laurent, his way of ensuring my freedom without being here. I waited impatiently to see if this was a trap set for me, ready to be sprung when I reacted. Minutes passed and no one came back to secure the door. This was it, this was my chance to be free.

I knew that chances like this will not come again soon. I was sick; sick of being here, sick of pretending that I was okay, and sick of being treated like an object. I staggered out of the cell, that was holding me, to find that I was trapped in a dimly lit maze. I started running for my life.

I began to think, _"I can't escape because there are too many people around me." _They're there in the shadows, watching and waiting for me. Or are they? Maybe I was hallucinating, again. All I knew was, I needed to get out of here before I went crazy or die. I'm unsure which would be preferable.

Turning a corner in this maze of tunnels and thinking, if only I could remember the way out, I would be free. I thought that I would remember. I've made that walk so many times, that you would think it was a second nature. All I wanted was freedom. Freedom to return to my life; back to my family and friends, and more importantly to my Bella - my reason for living and trying to escape from this hell that I'm in. I just hope that after all this time and what I have done; she will take me back. I dare not to think of her not wanting me. That would surely kill me.

She has been my reason for surviving these last few months. Suddenly, I realize, that I have no idea how long I have been gone, it is impossible to mark time here. In my haste, I stumble over my own feet. Obviously I'm not as strong and together as I think I am and fall over, flat on my face. It should hurt, but with the adrenalin coursing through me at the moment, I feel no pain. I try to stand but my ankle won't take my weight. Shit! I must've twisted it when I fell, but I can't give in. I have to get out of here; no matter what it takes.

I dread the noise I hear; slow, heavy footsteps coming towards me. Either someone had discovered that I was missing, or I was just plain unlucky. I didn't care which one of the two, I only cared about facing my discovery. There was a sound of something dragging along the narrow corridor walls. I didn't wanna think about what it was. I needed get away but I was frozen; adrenalin replaced by fear.

"Edward, I know you're there. I can smell your fear," the voice was low and menacing, and closing in on me. I was sure that he can hear my heart beating; it felt like it was coming out of my chest. I needed to remain calm. This was the best chance of escape that I've been afforded. I couldn't imagine a chance like this coming again anytime soon. Pure cold fear ran through me. I've come up against him many times before. He was truly a sadistic bastard. I have never met anyone like him before. I knew that he enjoyed any chance to use his fists. I should know, I've been on the receiving end enough in my time here. He has never shown anything other than pure hatred for me since the first moment we met. I knew that my captors were truly capable of anything. That's what scared me the most, the fear I would never be free to leave here; that I would die at their hands.

I didn't want to think about how I would die, if that is what they chose. I only hoped that they would show me some compassion and make it quick. Truly, I felt that they didn't care if I lived or died. I was an object to them; nothing of any real importance or value. I could be all too easily disposed of if they saw fit.

I hear a low, sadistic but familiar chuckle, from behind me. I turn towards the noise; I'm still on the ground where I fell. Damn! If I'd been more careful I might have made out of here. I see him grinning back at me. He was holding a baseball bat; hitting it into his free hand.

In a menacing way, he growls. "Oh Edward, you'll never ever learn will you? Now, you're really gonna to pay for this." Sneering he reached down towards me. I panicked as I knew there is no way out of this. I have failed; failed Bella, my family and more importantly myself, in my attempt to return to normality.

I tried not to show my fear or the disappointment flooding through me now that my attempt to escape had failed. These are clear signs of weakness. He leaned toward me and I felt yet again, the strength he had as he punched me squarely in the jaw. I taste, the now all too familiar, metallic taste as blood, fill my mouth. He then punched me again, this time landing higher. I'm sure my cheekbone cracked, as my head whipped away from the punch.

I heard his dark chuckle, then a sharp pain. My body relaxed and began to float away. This feeling was all too familiar to me. I tried to stay conscious but I lost my battle, yet again to the blackness.

Once again my body ached, pain rippled through every part of me. I wondered if it was possible to become immune to it, maybe my threshold was higher now than it was when I first arrived. But still it hurt, I groaned and tried to turn onto my side but I couldn't. My arms and legs wouldn't move either, nor could I sit upright. Shit, this could not be good.

Hearing footsteps getting closer to be but not being able to turn toward them made the panic rise from deep inside me. They remained just out of my field of vision, a clever move on their part and the anticipation of what was to come was. I knew that if I was caught trying to escape the punishment that was meted out would be severe, I could only hope that they would choose to punish me and not my family. I never thought about them in all this.

The voice that broke through the silence was the one that I feared the most, Aro.

"So Mr Cullen. I understand that you are growing tired of my hospitality, and that you are looking to leave. Is this right?" His voice was calm.

"N-n-n-no." I stuttered.

"Really? So why were you found wandering the corridors down here on your own."

He seemed to walk away from me and then back again. "Well? What was the reason for you being out of your accommodation?"

"I hadn't seen anyone, I panicked and thought that I had been forgotten." I hoped that he would believe me. "I wanted to begin my training again, I was looking for the training room."

Aro's face appeared, hovering over me. "That's wonderful news, Mr Cullen, I will let Felix know of your eagerness to rejoin him. We have rather a busy calendar and I fully intend to get my money's worth out of you while I have you here."

The last words scared me, 'while I have you here.' What did that mean?

"Laurent! Come now and release Mr Cullen from his restraints. Now." He barked the order and soon enough I felt my limbs regain sensation once again and I moved to sit upright.

I caught the look on Laurent's face, he looked relieved that I hadn't revealed anything.

Aro clapped his hands excitedly. "I am so looking forward to seeing you back where you belong, making me money and carrying out my orders. There is much for me to organize. Laurent here will take care of you."

With that he left, The silence that fell over us was deafening. "Laurent, I am sorry. I thought-" He held up his hand to tell me to be quiet.

When he was sure that there was no one around he spoke in a low voice.

"You are a fool, James could easily have killed you for that. What would have happened to Bella then? I told you to trust me and you have to do just that. I have a plan in place, be patient."

I'm sorry Laurent. I shouldn't have done that, I thought that this was your sign for me to escape."

He snapped. "Well it wasn't. I have no urge to die, you will know when the time is right. Trust me on that."

As he walked away, closing the door to my prison and locking me inside once again. Right now I felt something that I hadn't felt for a long time. I felt hope.

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><p><strong>Authors note;<strong>

Thanks to Leigh Warner for pre-reading this for me and for being there when this Edward clammed up and refused to speak. He does that alot so while he is feeling chatty I am gonna keep listening.

The chapter isn't beta'd as I said before Steph is taking a break at the moment, but I know you guys have been waiting long enough.

I do read all the reviews that you leave, they mean so much to know that you are there. Thanks for reading and if you feel like leaving a review, you know what to do ;-)

_**Fandom for LLS**_

I am contributing to this, it is something new and will be a dark Carlisle, very dark and delicious. So if you want to get the first one, maybe two chapters well ahead of the rest head onto my profile page and follow the link and donate. If you need tempting, here is a teaser.

_**Darkness Within.**_

_My name is Carlisle Cullen, I am 573 years old. Surprising I know, I can hear the questions forming in your feeble mind already. Is he really that old? How is he not dead? To answer those two, yes I am really that old, and how am I not dead? Well that is simple really. I am a vampire, and yes those do exist._

_I am the patriarch and founder of our coven, which many know as the Olympic coven. To the humans who are lucky to share the same air as me, I am Dr Cullen, the kindly doctor who works long hours at the local hospital, taking care of the sick and injured who require medical attention. To others of our kind, I am the head of our coven, someone to be respected and revered. To the coven members who I brought over into this world, or allowed to join, I am to be feared and respected in equal measure. My word is law, to go against my commands is foolish. To those who really know me, the real me I am a figure to be feared, and rightly so_

_Why am I telling you this? Well that's simple. I don't want you to think I am any kind of monster for what I'm about to tell you. One of the rules of my coven is that all who enter are mine to command and control. If I want something they have, I will take it. This applies to everything, their possessions, food and of course and most importantly their mates._

**PLEASE NOTE: This will NOT post anywhere until the whole story is complete and I have no idea how long it will be chapter wise.**


	25. Within Reach

**Disclaimer: No copyright infringement is intended.**

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><p>Days passed until I was led back into the training room. It turned out that I had indeed sprained my ankle, although not badly it was enough to grant me a small respite from the gruelling schedule that I was now embarking on. Aro had taken my words at face value and my training was increased. Felix allowed me no respite from what seemed a never ending workout. In some ways I was glad that I had this, it gave me a focus away from wondering when Laurent would tell me that things were in place for me to make my escape, for real his time. I was often exhausted by the time I was returned to my cell that I would fall asleep and the circle would begin anew.<p>

I didn't see Laurent for the first few days, and I began to wonder if he was still here, or had they discovered our plans? There was no way that I could ask anyone without arousing suspicion. Then one night as I was returned to my cell he stepped inside with my food.

We didn't speak as James released my handcuffs and left. I eat the food without drawing breath causing him to chuckle.

"I remember when you wouldn't eat anything Edward, how things have changed."

Wiping my mouth with the back of my hand I answered him. "I have to, have you not heard how hard I am working these days?"

He nodded. "Yes I had." Then he moved to sit on the bed next to me. "This is going to be a big night, a lot of people are going to be there. It is going to be the perfect time for you to escape. But we need to be cautious. I will only tell you when on the night what the plans are to be. That way you cannot slip and reveal anything in error."

"Why? Do you think I would betray you? I have to get out of here before I go crazy. Believe me, I would never say anything." I rambled.

"I know, it's just the less you know the better." He then rose to his feet. "All you need to do is be ready to follow the instruction that I will give you. Now I have to leave before people become suspicious. Do not step out of line, obey every order they give you. There should be no reason for them to punish you. I know that James is looking for a reason, any reason to hurt you. You have to fight that night or else all will be lost."

I nodded. Watching as he walked to the door of my cell I confirmed "I will be ready." With that he left.

My mind was racing, soon I would be out of here forever, back with Bella and my family. Safe from harm once again, this nightmare would be over but a new one would begin as I tried to rebuild my life, knowing that I would have to tell her the truth behind my absence. She would need to know, no she deserved to know the truth. My fear was that it would rip us apart when I had fought so hard to get back to her. The thoughts refused to leave me alone and I spent the night sleeping fitfully making the next days training even harder as I struggled to keep myself awake. If Felix noticed he didn't say anything he worked me harder than before and I was exhausted by the end of the session. I was ready to pass out when James walked into my cell sneering.

"On your fucking knees Cullen."

I instantly obeyed and felt the cold snap of handcuffs as they encased my wrists. He brought me to my feet, growling in my ear. "Don't think about trying to escape. Then again maybe you should, all I need is a reason and I will beat you to within an inch of your pathetic, miserable life." I didn't respond, other than to drop my head down avoiding all eye contact as he led me through the corridors and upstairs to Aro's office. The daylight hurt my eyes and I was forced to squint, it had been so long since I was exposed to it. The darkness of my prison had become what I was used to so this was akin to shining a very bright light directly into someones eyes. However, I didn't stop, I continued to walk where I was being led.

As the doors closed behind me I knew what was expected of me and I sank to my knees before his desk while I waited for him to address me. My eyes were half closed and remained fixed on the ground in front of me as I took deep breaths to calm myself for whatever announcement he was about to make. The ticking of the clock was the only way to mark time as I waited to be addressed, each time I heard the melodic tick to I relaxed a little more my own heartbeat falling into a steady rhythmn. Then suddenly a pair of high polished black leather shoes filled my field of vision.

"Mr Cullen. How nice of you to join me here." The words felt like ice to me, I had no choice in the matter.

"You requested my presence Master." I answered forcing the words to sound contrite.

"Well it is wonderful to see that you know how to behave in my presence." He walked away from me. "I have brought you here to tell you about the next event that you will be showcasing your talents at. You will have noticed that we have increased your training regime, that is all in preparation. The night in question is the largest event I host and obviously, only the very best of my men will represent me. Do you feel worthy of that task Mr Cullen?"

I didn't know if I should answer, but a sharp shove in my back told me that an answer was expected, regardless of if I had a choice in the matter.

"Of course Master, it would be a great honor to represent you." I replied.

"Excellent. Then your training will increase and you will be showcased that night. I am very much looking forward to it. As is your last opponent, Riley Biers. I was frustrated last time you met as I know that he should not have taken you down so easily so I have arranged a rematch for you, which you will win. Do I make myself clear?"

I nodded, I remembered how Riley had taunted me and somehow he seemed to be in league with James. Things next time would be very different, the fight would be fair and more importantly I would win.

It seemed that we had been dismissed as I was pulled to my feet and led back downstairs, James pushed me back into my cell where I fell on the ground. Instinctively I curled into a ball as I half expected him to attack me in some way. I think that for a moment he did entertain the idea but then I heard Felix's voice behind him.

"I suggest you get some rest for tomorrow we train harder than before. You have to be in top shape for the event. No excuses this time will be tolerated Cullen, if you do not please the Master then there is nothing that anyone can do for you." He leaned down and removed my restraints before he turned to leave with James.

"May I ask when this is?" My voice sounded so small, but I needed to know.

Felix turned to me. "Five days from now." Then he slammed the cell door behind him.

Five days, that was all that I had left here in this rotten, stinking shit hole. Five days before I could walk in the sunshine, breathe fresh air once again, hold Bella in my arms. Finally there was a light at the end of the very long and dark tunnel that I had been in. All I had to do was wait. I knew that Laurent wouldn't let me down, he had promised me that there was a way to free me at this event. My trust and ultimately my life were in another's hands. As much as I hated that thought, I knew that there was nothing I could do other than to get through the next five days and be ready for my chance.

The days blurred into one long mass of training, I was restless knowing that soon my ordeal would be over very soon. It was hard to keep my eagerness under control and a couple of times while I was training with Felix I felt him staring at little too intently, could he know that I was thinking? Sometimes it felt like he could look right into my mind and see what going on in there, it scared me. After that I made a huge effort to be calmer it seemed to working until one day as he escorted me back to my cell he questioned me.

"You seem to be looking forward to this fight Cullen. Any particular reason?"

I stumbled as his words sank in. "Erm, no. I have down here too long and I know that last time I disappointed Master. I feel have to right that wrong the only way can, by doing the best I can at the next event. He also said this was an important night for him. I have to please him."

Silence fell between us as we walked the rest of the way to my cell. Once there I walked inside and he stared at me.

"Yes, it is an important night. We all fight, it's about his standing in this world. Failure is not an option." He confirmed.

"We all fight? You mean that you fight too?" I asked shocked.

Felix nodded. "Yes. James, Laurent and myself all participate in our own events."

I couldn't think of anything else to say and so Felix left me alone as he retreated into the darkness, leaving me alone once again with my thoughts. As I laid down my brain was running wild, they _all _fought? That must mean that this was a huge event. I mean Aro had said as much but I hadn't realized just how big this was going to be. I pitied the person that would be fighting against Felix, the man was huge, his size dwarfed that of Emmett and I always thought that he was well built. It would be like running into a brick wall at full speed. James, now he was another matter. Lithe and devious, he would know and employ every trick in the book to get what he wanted, to win. I just hoped that I wasn't put up against either of them as there was no way that I would survive.

The next morning I woke naturally and found myself wondering what had happened to my normally wake up call for training. It was quiet, almost too quiet down here and I shouted to try and get someones attention but no one came. The hours seemed to pass and still there was no sign of life down here with me. This was strange. Even when I was in here alone I could still hear people moving around, feet shuffling on the floor and yet now there was nothing. Had they left me here alone to rot? Maybe Laurent's plans for the fight had been uncovered and this was seen as the perfect punishment for me to die alone in my cell.

My breathing started to get faster and my heart pounded quicker in my chest, this couldn't be happening. Not after everything that I had endured, I wouldn't die down here. I grabbed hold of the bars, shaking them with every ounce of strength that I had as I screamed for someone, anyone to acknowledge me, and still no sound came. Eventually I fell to the floor, exhausted as tears began to fall from my eyes. I wasn't aware of anything until I felt a hand upon me. Instinct made me flinch away from them, cowering into the nearest corner that I could find Then I saw Laurent crouching in front of me.

"Ssh, it's okay Edward. There is no need to be afraid." He whispered.

"Laurent? I thought you were gone? I shouted and no one came." I managed in a hoarse voice.

"I know, we were all otherwise occupied. We had training and then a stratetgy meeting to attend to finalize plans for this evenings fight." He paused briefly looking around my cell. "Has no one been down here today?"

I shook my head. "No, that's why I thought that things had gone wrong. I was worried about-"

He silenced me by placing his hand over my mouth. "You should have been brought food throughout the day. Strength will be required for tonights events." He rose to his feet. "I will see to it that you are cared for. I might not see you until the venue. But I will be there when you fight. Trust me on that."

I nodded, showing that I not only understood but also that I trusted him and with that, he left.

-O-O-O-O-

I had been fed and allowed to shower before I was given a change of clothes. Then just as every other time I had been escorted outside my wrists were bound and my head covered. The drive was boring an no one spoke. From the sounds I could make out were were travelling through a city, there were people shouting and the general noise you would associate with being there. The van stopped and I could hear someone banging on the side right next to where my head was shouting profanities. I jumped in surprise and for a split second thought about shouting for help, surely they would hear me, then I felt a blade press against my throat.

"Don't even think about it Cullen, or I will slit your throat." The voice of James spoke menacingly into my ear.

We began to move again but his knife remained at my throat, keeping me silent. I daren't even breathe. Then we pulled off the road and appeared to be travelling up a steep hill and then we appeared to be following a repetitive route with more inclines. This was strange and highly disorientating for me. So much so that when the van stopped moving and I was led out I fell to the ground. Hard concrete met me as did he laugh of James.

"Get the fuck up Cullen." He mocked as he grabbed hold of my arm, dragging me to my feet.

I was then pushed forward and I began to walk toward the voices that I could hear in the distance. Once we were close James pushed me to one side and then I was pushed to my knees. I had expected my restraints and hood to be removed but they remained in place. The voices were carrying to where I was and I could make out Felix and Aro along with some others that I didn't recognize. They were discussing the plan for this evening and who would be fighting when. My name was mentioned and instinctively I turned toward them only to have my head pulled in another direction and yet again James' voice was too close for comfort.

"That doesn't concern you Cullen." He released my head, pushing it forward in the process. "Laurent! Come and take him away, this really doesn't concern him."

I heard footsteps approach and I was helped to my feet. "James, you treat worse that you would an animal. You should at least show him respect." Laurent snapped.

Suddenly before I could do anything to stop it, I was pushed and fell. My head hit the concrete and it hurt like a bitch.

There was the sound of scuffling near and seeing as I couldn't see my instinct was to curl into a ball to try and protect myself as I was sure that I was the last thing on their minds right now.

A voice cut through the air. "Enough! We have far more important things to deal tonight than your perpetual pissing contest." Felix roared. "I really don't have the time to be dealing with this shit. Now go, you both know what you have to do."

I heard grumbles and half hearted apologies before I felt a hand on me once again. "Come on Edward, we need to get you ready." With that Laurent led me away, once we were some distance away he removed my hood and cuffs, briefly examining me for signs injury. There were marks around my wrists where the cuffs had pulled at the skin. He let out a sigh as he led me toward the stairwell, I stopped to look around my surroundings. I was in a parking garage. This was a strange place to hold a fight, a little too public I would have expected it to be somewhere quieter, with less chance of being discovered.

It was as if he knew what I was thinking. "Come, after we see the doc I will show you around." Then he took me up three flights of stairs to where there was a man sitting on the tailgate of his Chevrolet SUV. When he saw us approach he didn't move, infact he hardly acknowledged our presence until we were stood infront of him.

He glanced at his watch "I don't clock on for at least another hour."

Laurent leaned forward and grabbed him around the throat. "You work when we say, don't forget it."

When Laurent pulled back I swear that I saw a glimmer of fear cross the mans face as he scrambled to his feet.

"Okay, Okay. What is it you need me to do? Isn't it a little early for fighting." He asked.

"Just make sure he's okay. He fell to the ground and banged his head. Master will not tolerate anything stopping tonight." I could feel the chill in Laurent's tone, then he pushed me to sit on the tailgate while he stood watching what was happening intently.

The Doctor rummaged in the trunk and managed to examine me declaring that there were no serious injuries and that my wrists were okay but would need to be cared for as the skin had been broken. There was nothing that he could see that would prevent me from fighting tonight. Once Laurent was satisfied he led me away and over to the edge of the floor where we would see the bright lights of the city below us.

Finally I asked. "What do I have to do tonight? What are my instructions."

Laurent didn't look at me. "I cannot tell you, master will speak to you soon." There was a pause as he pulled a pair of leather cuffs from his pocket before handing them to me. "Put these on. No one should see the injury to your wrists, that could raise too many awkward questions."

I scoffed. "Oh and we wouldn't want people to wonder about me, would we?"

He turned on me. "Do you want to get out of here? I have put alot into getting you out of here tonight, and you mock me? I could just walk away now and let you continue to rot, is that what you want?"

His words were like a punch in the gut. "No, please. I'm sorry, I certainly didn't mean any disrespect to you. I understand how much you are risking for me and I hope one day to be able to repay your kindness. If there-"

He cut me off, his hand raised between us. "Don't make promises that you can't be sure you will keep. There are no guarantees here." With that he turned and walked away from me.

I fastened the thick leather bands around my wrists, They were a close fit and covered the marks left by the handcuffs. Taking some deep breaths I walked toward him. "I'm sorry if I offended you, that was not my intention. I promise I will do as you ask tonight." I swallowed afraid to ask but forcing the words out. "So, when I get my instructions?" I wanted tonight over and done with so I could be free.

"Soon. Come with me." He walked away and I followed him as he down the stairwell and led us out onto one of the floors. Laurent opened his arms wide. "This is where is will all happen. The largest fight in our calendar and the most lucrative. There will be fights happening on several different levels simultaneously." He turned to me. Yours, will be one of the main events. It-"

He was stopped from explaining further by Felix shouting. "Laurent! You are both required downstairs. Master is ready for you."

Laurent nodded and led me down the stairs and out onto the level we had been on previously where he and James fought. Aro was stood to one side deep in conversation with the man I recognized as his brother. We stopped just in front of them, automatically my head bowed and I clasped my hands together in front of me. It took all I had not to fall to me knees. I have no idea how long I was standing there but I retreated into my own world.

I didn't hear the voices around me that were speaking to me, it felt like they were a million miles away from me, not addressing me at all. Then I fell to the floor, writhing in agony. The pain stopped just as quickly as it had started and I scrambled to my feet before daring to look into the eyes of my tormentor.

"Oh so you do pay attention then Mr Cullen? I was beginning to think that this recent obedient streak of yours what too good to be true." Aro said.

"I-I was-"

"Not given permission to fucking speak." Cauis interrupted his hand raised to strike me, I didn't flinch or show any sign of fear to him.

Aro stepped inbetween us, taking hold of his hand. "We have talked about this before brother. You don't interfere. Remember?"

Cauis simply nodded. "Forgive me, I meant no disrespect. Brother." His words were laced with something, but I couldn't work out if it was sarcasm or indifference.

Aro turned his attention back to me, slowly turning away from his brother "Mr Cullen, I assume that you were distracted as you were thinking about how to please me tonight and make me some money?"

I dare not answer him as I was unsure what the right answer would be. Laurent came forward and spoke. "Master, he has been treated by the doctor and classed as fit to fight tonight."

Aro's eyes flickered briefly to Laurent as look of annoyance on his face. "Good." He then took a step closer to me. "Mr Cullen, tonight you are going to fight like you never have before. There are at least two fights scheduled for you. The first is more of a warm up than anything. The second, a rematch between you and Biers who you fought last time out." He paused as an evil smile flickered across his face. "It seems that you made quite an impression on him, he asked for you specifically. Normally I would not allow such a request but he was quite persuasive. Who am I to say no to him?"

I knew better than to answer. Of course I remembered our last meeting, James had broken my fingers just before it and I had been deprived sleep so I was definitely not at my best. This time I would be ready for him, I was in good shape and had been training hard. Biers would not know what had hit hm.

Aro gave further instructions to Laurent who simply nodded and then led me away once we were effectively dismissed. He led me to a corner where my hands were bound with tape in readiness. I could hear the sound of people arriving, filling the air with excitement. It seemed to filter into me. I was excited to do this, maybe because freedom was now within reach. I warmed up by running from one side of the parking lot floor and then back again before I began shadow boxing, practicing my punches and generally psyching myself up for what was to come.

All too soon Laurent placed his hand on my shoulder saying two words to me that sent a thrill of pure excitement through me.

"It's time."

This was it, I was in the home straight now. Two fights stood between me and my freedom, I could see it, taste it and soon I would experience being free of my captors and this nightmare would be over.

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><p><strong>Authors Notes:<strong>  
>Again no beta on this, hopefully Steph will be back soon, but thanks to Leigh Warner fro pre-reading. I wasn't sure about leaving it here, I wanted to do so much more but it didn't feel right. Please do leave me a review, anyone who does will get a sneak peek of the next chapter. Not sure when it will post yet.<p>

**_Fandom for LLS_**

I am contributing to this, it is something new and will be a dark Carlisle, very dark and delicious. So if you want to get the first one, maybe two chapters well ahead of the rest head onto my profile page and follow the link and donate. If you need tempting, here is a teaser.

_Darkness Within._

_My name is Carlisle Cullen, I am 573 years old. Surprising I know, I can hear the questions forming in your feeble mind already. Is he really that old? How is he not dead? To answer those two, yes I am really that old, and how am I not dead? Well that is simple really. I am a vampire, and yes those do exist._

_I am the patriarch and founder of our coven, which many know as the Olympic coven. To the humans who are lucky to share the same air as me, I am Dr Cullen, the kindly doctor who works long hours at the local hospital, taking care of the sick and injured who require medical attention. To others of our kind, I am the head of our coven, someone to be respected and revered. To the coven members who I brought over into this world, or allowed to join, I am to be feared and respected in equal measure. My word is law, to go against my commands is foolish. To those who really know me, the real me I am a figure to be feared, and rightly so_

_Why am I telling you this? Well that's simple. I don't want you to think I am any kind of monster for what I'm about to tell you. One of the rules of my coven is that all who enter are mine to command and control. If I want something they have, I will take it. This applies to everything, their possessions, food and of course and most importantly their mates._

PLEASE NOTE: This will NOT post anywhere until the whole story is complete and I have no idea how long it will be chapter wise.


	26. Fight To Freedom

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or any of these characters. No copyright infringement is intended**

**Quick reminder: This is still Edward retelling the story of what happened to him. Not long until we get back to the beach house and get people's reactions!**

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><p>His words chilled me to the bone, this was it. All I had to do was get through the next couple of hours and I would be out of here. I nodded at him, acknowledging I had heard his words and was led to the stairwell. The noise echoed through it was intense and I had to take a breath in an attempt to calm my fraying nerves before I could begin to descend the stairs where I would meet my opponent. Three flights down Laurent paused before leading me out into a now crowded level of the parking garage, only there were no cars but a sea of people. It reminded me of the first fight I had, it was not a memory I cared to dwell on. After that I had laid next to a dead man in the back of the van, I was there when they disposed of him like he was nothing. Shaking the thought from my head I stepped forward and the baying crowd parted.<p>

I heard my arrival being announced but not my name. The crowd cheered as I stepped into the makeshift ring but I didn't acknowledge them. My eyes quickly found James standing on the sidelines, he had some cuts on his face and was only wearing a pair of jeans with a towel slung around his neck. From the looks of things he had just finished a fight and I assumed that he had won. The referee tapped me on the shoulder and I jumped at the contact.

"Fair fight, you both know the rules. Now begin." Was all he said.

A loud klaxon sounded and the fight began. My opponent was older than me, he looked a similar age to my father and I felt bad for having to do this. I could easily have thrown the fight but I wanted to use this as a warm up for my rematch with Biers, The man lunged clumsily at me and I sidestepped him easily, watching as he stumbled into the crowd behind me. They simply jeered and pushed him back to me. There was fear in his eyes, something that I recognized all too well, but this was not the time for me to show compassion, none was ever shown to me. I remembered that he was here for one reason and one reason alone, to fight me, to win. There was no way that I could allow that to happen.

My right fist swung at his chin, connecting cleanly I watched as he stumbled backward from the force of my blow. Had I hit him that hard? I didn't think that I had. He gathered himself for a moment as I stood still, waiting for his next move. What I didn't expect was the loud roar that came from him as he ran at me, his head bent, he smashed into my shoulder knocking me to the ground. I was slightly winded by this but soon regained my composure. The crowd was screaming for blood, mine, sensing there could be an unexpected victory here. Could I really lose to this man?

The answer to that was no, even though he was straddling me, trying without much success to rain a succession of blows onto my face. My arms covered my face while I caught my breath. Then I made my move. He was growing tired following his seemingly relentless attack on me, all I needed was a moment when he was distracted and I would strike.

When the chance came, I seized it. My arms came down from my face, my hands grabbed the collar of the shirt that he was wearing. Rookie mistake on his part. I had been taught that when you step into a fight, you do not wear a shirt, jeans were more than enough for someone to grab hold of but they were a necessary evil. Once I had firm hold I bought my right knee up into his back and propelled him over my head. The thud that I heard as he landed on the concrete behind me told me that I injured him. I scrambled to my feet and was surprised to see that he had done the same, there was certainly some fight left in him.

I placed a couple of well aimed kicks to his torso, knowing that I had hit his kidneys and I watched as he fell to the ground, writhing in agony before he stilled. The referee came over and checked him for a pulse before grabbing hold of my arm and lifting it in the air declaring me the winner. The roar that erupted from the crowd was immense; I was paraded as victor while my opponent was carried away.

Aro stepped forward, clapping his hands slowly. Once he was in front of me he raised his hands to silence the crowd, I was amazed how quickly they followed his command, then he spoke.

"Tonight gentlemen you have seen my fighter take an easy win. If you want to see a real fight, make your way of course with your money to the thirteenth floor after the next two rounds and see him really make, or lose you some money."

A murmur ran through the crowd before another cheer rang through them. Aro simply turned and smiled at me before he left. Laurent was then at my side, leading me back through the crowd and away so that I could recover. For a brief moment I thought that I saw a face that I recognized, when we made eye contact he turned away quickly and I stopped and stared after him. Laurent turned to me. "What's wrong?"

I replied quickly. "I thought I saw someone I knew, I must've been mistaken though."

"Come, we have to prepare you for the next fight." Was all he said as he led me away. I glanced back over my shoulder to where I thought that I had seen him, but there was no one there, just another face that was baying for blood. My mind was clearly playing tricks on me.

I was handed a bottle of water and checked over for any signs of injury. My mind was racing and I was excited, the adrenaline running through me from my easy win, and the prospect of facing Riley again. Laurent took my face in his hands. "Edward, look at me. You have to calm down; going into the next fight like this could get you killed. Riley is a skilled opponent. You cannot take your eyes off him for a moment."

I pulled away. "Okay, I get it, I need to calm down. But Laurent this is nearly over for me, I'm gonna be-"

The words froze in my mouth as James appeared seemingly out of nowhere. He stood observing us, with his head cocked to one side.

Laurent didn't turn to him, in fact he pretended that he hadn't noticed his arrival.

"Yes Cullen, tonight is nearly over but there will be other opportunities for you to demonstrate your skills. Master has great plans for you, just don't disappoint him."

James stepped closer. "No, it really wouldn't be wise to do that Edward, I am kinda getting to like you in a strange way." He said in a low voice, only then did Laurent acknowledge his presence.

"James, I assume that you have come to prepare for your next fight?" He nodded slowly. "Everything you need is over there." He nodded toward the van that was parked on the other side of the floor away from us before Laurent's name was being called from the stairwell causing him to move away from us to find the person who had called him.

James simply grabbed a bottle of water and a produced a small bottle from his jacket which was in the van. I watched as he removed the cap and tossing small, white tablets into his hand before he swallowed them before taking large gulps of his water. He turned to me offering me the bottle.

"Want some? Will give a real edge to your fight."

I hesitated, looking to see where Laurent was. "I… I don't know. What are they?"

He stepped closer to me. "Natural stimulants. Just don't tell him." James nodded to where Laurent had gone. "He wouldn't approve. Trust me, they give you a bit of extra energy when you need it most."

"I really shouldn't" I whispered.

"Look, I might be a cold heartless bastard, but you are up for a tough fight with Biers. He's tough, really tough. The offer is open, I mean would I take them if they were going to harm me?" He offered me the bottle once again and I reached out my palm for him to deposit some. "Good man!" He said as he shook two of the tiny white pills into my hand and offered me his water. I declined, picking up my bottle.

All I could say was. "Thanks." He nodded his head and moved away before Laurent came back.

The feeling of guilt didn't leave me as Laurent rejoined me, asking. "Are you okay? Did he do anything?"

"No, it's all good. He was, kinda friendly in a weird way." I explained.

Laurent looked serious for a moment. "Well, never mind him. You need to prepare for your fight as you, are up next. Come on."

We made up the stairs to the thirteenth floor. Laurent paused just before we exited the stairwell, turning to me. "This is very different to the other levels, here we have the serious gamblers and associates of the Master mingling with the normal people. You need to remember that you represent Volterra here, and you _must_ win. Master will not think twice about having your neck snapped in front of everyone if you lose. You are nameless to them, no one knows or cares who you are. Understood?"

I nodded slowly, this was it, make or break for me. He handed me a bottle of what looked like water. "Drink this, you are going to need it." Without thinking I swallowed the contents down, handing the empty bottle back to Laurent.

"Let's do this." I said as I rolled my shoulders back, and mentally prepared myself to enter the lions den for the final time.

The noise was once again deafening as I made my way through the crowd. This time I looked around and saw that there were far more people than I had seen previously, and this level of the garage was open air, with another duplex level just above it. That was where I saw Aro standing, surrounded by a group of people all of whom seemed completely indifferent to my arrival.

Then I saw him, Riley Biers. He was pacing back and forth seemingly channeling nervous energy into some form of action as he waited for me to arrive. Once I stood in the center of the arena, he stopped. Turning to smile at me we ended up staring at each other, each sizing the other up before the fight began.

Aro's voice cut through the air. "Tonight, we have a rematch. These two have met before, but that was only a warm up event. Now I can allow you to see them do battle for your entertainment. Only one rule here gentleman, don't disappoint me. You may begin when ready."

The crowd roared their approval and I extended my hand out to him as a gentlemanly gesture and he took it, pulling me to him, no one would have noticed that he whispered in my ear words that chilled me to the bone and put me off guard.

"Edward Cullen, we meet again" He sneered.

How did he know my name? There was no way that he could or should know it. With that he pushed me backward and I stumbled slightly. This was all it took for him to launch his first assault on me. His blows landed on stomach like I was a punch bag before he backed off, a smile wide on his face as confusion colored mine. We circled each other, both looking for a weak spot, a way to catch their opponent off guard. I read his body language well, remembering all too well the previous fight and how it felt to lose to him.

He lunged at me, and I managed to land a punch on his jaw, but this didn't stop him and soon we were locked together, both of us trying to get an upper hand on the other, seeking purchase on each others skin, but there was none to be found..

His hold on me slipped and I managed to put some distance between us. He kicked out at me, trying to sweep my legs out from under me and I leapt over his feeble attempt, but I landed awkwardly in the process aggravating my previously weakened ankle. A hiss of pain escaped me, and this spurred him on as he saw my weak point and kicked out at it causing a sharp jolt of pain to travel up my leg.

I lashed out at him, landing a couple of good punches before he retaliated with twice as much force as I had managed to put in. I fell to the ground on my hands and knees, gasping for breath when I felt the crook of his elbow against my throat as he pulled my head up. I scrabbled to get hold of his arm but the action of choking me was making it hard and I feared that I would pass out. In the haze I heard him speak. "She's better off without you Cullen."

"What do you mean?" I gasped.

"Bella, she needs to accept you're gone, never coming back. I can give her everything you can't."

"You're lying." I growled

"Afraid not, she is so close to giving up on you, maybe your corpse will give her enough reason to finally let me into her bed."

Those words scared me but at the same time they gave me a reason to fight. I allowed myself to go limp in his arms, which caused him to loosen his hold on me thinking that he was winning. Then I struck. I smacked my right elbow hard into him, hearing a sickening crack as I made contact with his ribcage. I spun around on my knees not caring that the concrete beneath them was gouging chunks from the skin. Riley was staring at me with wide eyes, I landed a well aimed punch on his jaw sending him sprawling onto the concrete. I quickly got to my feet, feeling an energy surge through me. This must've been what James was talking about, I felt like I could conquer the world.

I threw myself onto Riley's body, straddling him as I rained a succession of blows onto this face. I didn't care I was like a man possessed, he had made reference to Bella and that he wanted to kill me so that he could take my place, that was never going to happen, not while I had single breath left in my body. Getting to my feet I began to kick his body as it lay there on the gray concrete. He curled into the fetal position to try and afford him some protection but I was relentless.

When I paused I watched as blood flowed from his mouth as he laid before me, broken and defeated. Then he tried to speak. "She doesn't want you anymore."

That was it for me, I let out a loud, feral scream as I bent down and took hold of his head in my hands before I smashed it onto the concrete. I was about to repeat the action for a second time when strong arms were pulling me off him. A voice shouting in my ear.

"Enough, you have won." I continued to struggle, wanting nothing more than to end the man laying before me who wanted me dead so he could take my place.

I was led away and down one of the ramps, then I was faced with James and Laurent. Felix was the one holding me, but still I fought against him. "Let me go, I want to fucking kill the bastard."

"Cullen, this is enough! Are you really disobeying me?" He growled.

I couldn't think straight, my brain felt like it was on fire, a million thoughts were running thought it and I couldn't keep up with them. My heart was racing, my whole body tingled like there was electricity running through it. The faces of James and Laurent swam and distorted before my eyes. Then I began to shake and convulse violently in Felix's hold.

"Put him on the ground, now! Shit, what did you do to him? We need to call the doctor. Edward! Can you hear me? Is he breathing? Shit! I can't feel a pulse." Were the words that I heard all around me. I could see their faces before me as they stared into my eyes. I tried to respond to let them know that I was okay but the words wouldn't come. I could feel their hands on me and they checked for a pulse, first in my wrist then in my neck

"He's got a weak pulse, we need to do something, quickly." Laurent shouted.

"We have to move him, too many people will see if we deal with this here, questions will be asked. Master will be angry." James answered.

I felt myself being lifted into the air as I was thrown over Felix's shoulder and we began to move. The journey down the stair well was making me even more disorientated than I was before. Then we arrived on an empty level where I was laid on the ground, as they all just stared at me. I was screaming inside that I was okay, that they had to no need to worry. I feared that this was some sort of trick, that they had discovered Laurent's plan to free me and this was their revenge.

Felix knelt down next to me, turning my head toward him. "He's unresponsive, James go see where that fucking doctor is. Laurent, you need to inform Master, but be mindful of who is around him."

With that they both left, I heard their footsteps moving away, it was now just me and Felix.

"What the fuck happened to you Cullen?" He muttered almost to himself as I felt him checking my arms and legs over, what for I had no idea. His face looked concerned, and also scared. Then he said. "You better not die on me."

I tried to answer but nothing would come, neither could I move any of my limbs, it was like being locked inside a prison but no one could hear me.

The sound of fast moving footsteps caused Felix to step out of my line of vision. "What the fuck happened to him?" Then the doctor appeared in front of me, checking my pulse and breathing. He seemed shocked by what he saw These injuries are horrendous, could they have contributed to the state he is in now?" he asked.

"How the fuck would I know? You're the doctor not me. Do you not know what is wrong with him, 'cause I am telling you now if you don't, you had better work it before Master gets here." Felix sounded angry."

The doctor fussed over and around me. "His breathing is shallow, his heart is barely beating. The injuries are not enough alone to do this I don't think. Has… has he been treated properly?"

"Of course he has! What do you think we are? Barbarians." Felix yelled.

At that moment I heard the icy tone of Aro. "What happened here?" He then appeared over me. "The last time I saw him, he was fine. Now, this! Who is responsible?" He moved away I could hear his footsteps as they moved away once more. "Someone must have done something." He appeared to be thinking before he spoke once again. "Biers!" Have him brought to me."

"What do I do with him? He's on the verge of death" The Doctor whispered in hushed tones.

"Then it is simple. If he should die then you will die too." Aro's voice was loud, ensuring that all heard him and carried out his wishes should they be required.

Three voices replied in unison. "Understood master." It was clear by their reply that each and every one of them would not think twice to carry out the order given.

Aro spoke once again. "You need to leave as soon as possible. Leave Cullen here until you are ready. Return him to Volterra where we shall have another physician attend to him, one who actually knows what he is doing. Now I must return to my guests, before suspicions are aroused that anything is untoward."

I heard him leave, then the doctor screamed out and I heard the sound of a body hitting the ground before it was dragged away.

Laurent appeared before me, his hands touching my face as he whispered quickly. "Edward, I know that you can hear me. Hang in there, I have no idea what happened, the effects… they should not have been this strong. Forgive me."

There was no way for me to respond and to show that I understood his words, his assurances meant little to me now. I realized that this must be how he planned to free me, by faking some illness, and yet by accepting James' help earlier I might have just signed my own death certificate.

Eventually I was moved into the back of the van, Felix and Laurent acting as my guards. James was told to drive, and to make it fast. We seemed to be moving quickly through the empty night streets on our path back to Volterra, I was scared, so very scared and then I felt my body begin to shake and convulse once again, Liquid welled up in my mouth and I heard Felix say. "Turn him on his side, he's going to choke to death." He then shouted out. "Stop!"

James answered. "I can't, we are not somewhere I can stop without question."

"Well get somewhere we can you fool." Felix snapped.

The van lurched forward as James hit the gas pedal harder. I continued to shake and vomit. I could feel their hands on me as they attempted to hold me still. Then just as quickly as this started, it stopped. Fingers pressed against my neck and I waited to hear what they had to say.

To my surprise it was Laurent who spoke, his tone low and somber. "There's no pulse."

He was wrong, I was alive, not able to move but alive. This had to be part of his plan, then I felt another set of hands on me as Felix began to speak. "No, he can't be. You are wrong." There was a pause as he checked this for himself. "Fuck, he's right." Felix gasped. "There is no pulse."

James shouted back from the cab. "What do we do now?"

Felix was quiet, James continued to drive. It was Laurent who spoke. "We have to take him back to Volterra."

Then Felix finally spoke. "No, we cannot do that. The risk is too great, we need to dispose of the evidence not take it back with us."

"What do you propose that we do? Put him in a garbage dumpster?" James spat.

"We don't have much choice do we? Felix retorted. "We have to find somewhere to dump the body, it will look like he got into a street fight and lost, no one will question it. No one knows or cares who he is."

Laurent spoke. "We're near a bad part of town, let's drive a couple of blocks further towards where it is deserted and we can leave his body in one of the alleyways, agreed?"

Both men muttered their agreement and it wasn't long before the van stopped. I was dragged out and placed next to a dumpster before they retreated into the van and disappeared into the night like shadows.

The night was cold and rain had started to fall, but there was nothing I could do about it, other than to wait either for someone to find me, or death to claim me.

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><p><strong>Authors notes:<strong>  
>Thanks to Leigh Warner for pre-reading this for me and keeping me going. Thanks to everyone who reads and reviews, just knowing that you are still with me means so much. Please do leave a review by hitting the little button below.<p> 


	27. Homeward Bound

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or any of these characters. No copyright infringement is intended**

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><p>People rushed passed me by, assuming that I was some kind of drunk or drugged up to the eyeballs in whatever the latest street craze was these days. They would be partially right, just I wasn't in this situation by choice. As much as I tried to move, my body was still paralyzed the only indication that I was still alive was the ability to move my eyes. Someone leaned over me, the stench of beer and sweat normally would've made me vomit, but I wasn't able to respond. He pushed me causing me to slump flat to the wet concrete before he thrust his hands in the pockets of the jeans I was wearing, I assumed he was looking for a wallet or other valuables. Of course came up empty. Another man joined him peering over his shoulder to see what he was doing.<p>

"What the fuck you doing man?" He hissed, nervously looking around before he too leaned closer. "Shit, you robbing a corpse? That's fucked up, even for you. I want no part of it."

The sound of footsteps running away was all I heard then the man who was robbing me quickly followed his friend. Rain continued the fall and soon I was soaked to the skin, cold but incapable of shivering. It felt as if I was locked inside a tomb, which unfortunately was my own body. I closed my eyes and waited for death to finally take me feeling it would be a welcome relief from this hell. The temperature dropped and I closed my eyes as I began to drift away. I began to imagine that Bella was with me, that we were together again in our bed, she was wrapped in my arms having just spent hours making love. I worshipped her body, every curve, every last inch of her. She turned in my arms and her face changed, it wasn't Bella there any longer it was Heidi. I screamed but no sound would come from her lips. My eyes snapped open and I was shocked at what I saw, a woman was kneeled down next to me, her hand was on my cheek, the concern she felt was evident on her face.

"What happened to you? Can you talk?" She whispered to me. Her fingers pressed against my neck, I assumed she was checking for a pulse. "Shit, shit." I could only watch as she pulled out a cell phone from her pocket dialing a number before she pressed it to her ear.

"Hello 911? I need an ambulance quickly. I'm on the back of Gresham Street, in the alley… Yes I know that's not a great area… No I don't know what happened… He's not my client, I'm not a hooker. Look, if you don't get here he's going to die…He's a mid twenties male, looks like he's been badly beaten up. You need to get here, now! He's… he's barely breathing and I'm scared he won't make it… Okay, I'll be here with him. I won't leave him."

She ended the call, her face filling my field of vision. "You're going to be okay, there is an ambulance on its way. I'm not going anywhere, I'm gonna stay with you. Just don't go anywhere, okay. Focus on me. Shit! You're freezing. Here, let me put this over you. It won't do much but it should help."

With that, she removed her jacket and draped I over me. It didn't make me feel any warmer but the sentiment was enough to warm me. How long it took for the EMT's to arrive I couldn't guess, but true to her word she stayed with me until they did. I could hear her voice right until they loaded me into the back of the ambulance, then they closed the doors, leaving her outside.

The light inside was too bright, the fluorescents hurt my eyes to look at them so I closed my eyes for the rest of the journey to the hospital. Once we arrived I was moved quickly through the ER and into a treatment room. People were bustling in and out as they tried to assess what was wrong with me, I wished that they would work it out and I wanted to know every bit as much as they did. Laurent promised to help me, not nearly kill me. I wondered at the time if it was too good to be true, his promise that he help me get out of there, and back to Bella and my family. I should've trusted that doubt that niggled deep inside of me, but no. I just never thought for one minute that when my family saw me again, it would be on a mortuary slab as they were forced to indetify my body.

I heard a lot of medical terms being thrown around, but it seemed that no one knew what was actually wrong with me. They drew some blood, talking about tests and possible overdose. People came and went, all offering an opinion as to what they thought was wrong with me. I just wished there was some way that I could tell them what was wrong, and who I was so I could see my family and Bella now that I was I knew what was happening there was a lot of commotion with monitors and alarms beginning to beep. More people rushed into the room as I heard a shout of.

"He's crashed!"

A jolt of pain ran through my body as it lifted up into the air before it slammed back down onto the firm surface below. This repeated itself several times and I wanted to scream at them that I was obeying, they had no need to punish me, I would do anything they asked of me if only they would make the pain stop.

Then, there was nothing, just endless darkness enveloping me as I faded away once again.

My whole body ached, this was a relief of sorts as it meant I'd regained some kind of control over it, I remembered not being able to move. There were voices all around me, I thought I heard Bella and I fought to open my eyes and to sit upright but I couldn't, my arms were restrained. It had all been a dream, being free from the hell hole, getting back to my family. I was back there, paying for my stupid attempt to escape.

I pulled frantically against the restraints, crying out in my terror, not caring what the consequences were. The voices around me grew more terrified as I fought back, this was new. I'd expected to be silenced before now. But instead I heard Bella's voice.

"Edward? It's okay baby, you're safe. Please just relax, it's all going to be okay."

My eyes snapped open and I saw her standing next to me, her hand shakily reaching out toward me but she pulled it back slightly every time I yanked to get free. Then I saw that my wrists were bound to the metal sides on the bed.

"Let me go, please! I beg you, please I just want to be free." I sobbed. Bella's face crumbled, her hand covering her face, she backed away from me as if scared. There was a button on the wall that she reached out with a shaking arm before pressing with the palm of her hand . The door swung open and a male nurse came into the room, she took this chance to leave, it was like she couldn't get away from me fast enough. The large male nurse was towering over me, I began panic which was quickly replaced by a seething anger which I realized that this was my time to fight for what I wanted. "Get away from me, you can't take me back. I won't let you, I'll die before I let that happen." I shouted for Bella but she never came to me, she didn't try and save me. More people came into the room but I didn't pay them much attention as they held me down, all I wanted was her and she deserted me. My fight was gone, there was no reason to struggle if the one person I loved more than anything else could walk away so easily.

I felt their hands on me and her name fell from my lips repeatedly as I felt the sharp sting of a needle pierce my skin before an all too familiar feeling calm washed over me once again, embracing me as it took me back into the darkness with it once again.

As my eyes flickered open I looked around the room, this wasn't the same one as I had been in before, there wasn't that familiar 'hospital smell' about it. Confusion flashed through me as I wondered where I was, initially I thought that this was some part of Volterra that I hadn't seen, but this was heaven compared to where I had been. Things didn't make sense though, I could see a window with a view of trees and sky. Words could not describe how it felt to know that I could see the pale blue mottled with patches of white. I sat up in bed taking in my surroundings, it looked almost like a hotel, but I knew that it wasn't, it was too sterile; that also made me think that it wasn't Volterra.

The heels of my hands rubbed against my eyes as I tried to bring myself back around into the world of the living once again. I heard the door open and with some trepidation I turned toward it, and found myself staring into the eyes of the woman I loved, the one person I had longed to see more than anything. Tears filled her eyes and her face crumbled as she held my stare for what felt like forever before she rushed to me. My arms enveloped her, holding her to me so I could inhale her scent once again. The door opened once again and my parents stepped inside. My mom burst into tears and was comforted by my dad. I was free, and safe at last.

Once I could find my voice I asked. "How did you find me?"

Carlisle spoke. "You found us, or should I say you made your way back somehow. I received a phone call to say that an unknown male matching your age and description had been brought in unconscious. All the hospitals in a 50 mile radius have your description. We never stopped looking for you."

"Thank you." Was all I could say, but it didn't seem enough.

Knowing that I was finally free would take some getting used to. It was strange to know that I could get up and walk around and look out of the window whenever I wanted. Occasionally I would flinch when the door would open into my room. The worst reaction that I had was late one night when I panicked as I woke to find no Bella at my side and a nurse I didn't recognize coming towards me with a syringe It was a natural reaction for me. Nothing good ever came from a syringe while I as in Volterra. Fearing that she was here for nefarious reasons I screamed, lashed out and knocked it from the nurse's hand. This caused her to stumble backwards and lose her balance. She fled the room, I never saw her again. Bella ran back into the room and found me huddled in the corner, breathing heavily. It took her a long time to calm me down. I clung to her, sobbing and shaking until I was able to regain some of my composure. My parents moved me to a private clinic where I would have a dedicated team looking after me, people that I could trust. They wanted me back to how I was, but that was a battle that would take some time. I just never realized how long it would take, or what the cost would be.

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><p><strong>Authors note:<strong>

Pre-reader – Leigh Warner. Thanks to everyone for reading and reviewing, hope you are liking that he is finally free. How to make that happen and keep little drama going was hard but I hope that I got it right. A MASSIVE thanks to everyone who reviewed the last chapter, sorry if you didn't sign in I couldn't reply BUT I did appreciate all your support. Taken was also one of the Fics Of The Week over on The Writers Coffee Shop which was a huge honor for me.


	28. Truth Is Out

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or an of these characters and no copyright infringement is intended.**

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><p>For the first time since I started to tell the story of what happened to me and the horrors I had experienced during that time, I stopped talking, allowing myself to look into their faces. All I saw was the stares of my family and Bella looking back at me. The wide mixture of emotions were on their faces scared me. Did they not understand that I told them this because I needed them to understand what I had been through, the horrors that I had endured to get back here, to them.<p>

Tears stained Bella's face and it hurt me to know that I had caused them. I couldn't bear this any longer, I had to know what she was thinking inside that head of hers. I walked over to her to The reaction I got shocked me, her hand flew out and struck my face with a force that I really didn't expect from her. My hand went to the tender skin where she had made contact with my cheek, too stunned to say anything to her.

In a very calm voice she spoke. "You bastard! I wish you'd never come back, you deserved to rot there."

I watched as my family, ushered very discreetly by Carlisle, went back inside the house leaving only the two of us. He gave me a weak smile as he closed the French doors behind them. "Bella, please?" I whispered. "I understand you're angry, but I'm sorry. You wanted to know what happened, no more secrets. I owed you that much, didn't I?"

The anger that flashed in her eyes was clear. Her chest heaved as she tried to keep her control. The heels of her hands rubbed circles against the side of her temples. "What do you expect me to say? I have just sat here and listened to something that sounds like a movie script, only you were living it. The one part that I cannot get out of my head though, is that you lied to me. I knew that you had fucked someone that night after we fought, but yet you thought it was okay to lie to me, you told me that nothing happened Like a fool I believed you. Now, I find out that not only did you sleep with her, that you also left a permanent reminder behind of the night that ruined us. Plus all that… that... mess radiates your night of drunken fucking following our argument."

"I'm sorr-"

"Don't you dare say you're sorry." She rushed toward me, pushing me back and causing me to fall onto the sand. Quickly she was raining blows down. I covered my face with my arms in an attempt to fend off the blows."Sorry is when you forgot to take the garbage out, or you leave wet towels on the bathroom floor. I really think sorry isn't quite going to cover this. I'm pretty sure that there isn't a Hallmark card that covers, 'I'm sorry for fucking someone else, getting her pregnant, lying to the woman you profess to love, before getting yourself kidnapped by some lunatic who runs an underground fight club and kills people for fun.'"

Suddenly the blows stopped, as did her tirade only to be replaced by something worse, heartbreaking sobs. I moved my arms away from my face to see Bella in the arms of Emmett who looked like he was going to kill me. He called out for Rose who was hovering in the doorway. Bella was then taken back to the house by her, where I was sure that the rest of my family would be ready and waiting to offer the support she needed. I was left with Emmett.

I sat up, resting my elbows onto my knees. There was no way that I could look at him, his anger rolled off him in waves. I broke the silence between us. "I know what you're going to say Emmett, save your breath."

"Oh really, you think you know what I'm gonna say do you? Well Newsflash brother, I am going to say it anyway. You pretty much ruined the best thing to ever happen to you. I know you've been to hell and back, believe me there is nothing I want more to find that sick fucker and show him what it's like to be on the receiving end of what he thinks is fun." He let out a deep sigh. "I have no idea how you survived, I don't think I could've done the same.

We fell silent, only the sound of the ocean kept us company before Emmett spoke again. "How did you do it? I mean, stay there and fight like that."

I turned to face him. "Simple really, I had no choice. I told you they threatened you all. I believed that he would carry out on his threats, he knew everything about you."

"Yeah, well he would have had a hard time covering that up." Emmett snapped.

"He managed to take me from practically right under your noses though didn't he? No one knew what had happened to me the night when I left the club. I was like a ghost."

"We looked for you, hell it was like you had vanished from the face of the earth. Trust me, I asked everyone I could think of, even my contacts had people listening for news in circles I prayed that you wouldn't be in. Something , anything from you would have made it easier Then we got those damn letters, just didn't seem like something you would do. Bella knew that, and I stood by her no matter how crazy she sounded, and trust me she sounded plenty crazy. She never once gave up hope that you would come back to her."

A couple of memories came flooding back to me, something that had been said to me while I was away about Bella. Anger surged in me and I needed to know the answers right now. I couldn't wait, things seemed to have gone up in flames with regard to my relationship with Bella, so adding more fuel to the fire and watch it burn until there was truly nothing left but the smoldering ashes of what had been. I was on my feet storming toward the house, determined to know the truth. I ignored Emmett as he called after me. I burst through the French doors which subsequently bounced off the walls with the force exerted on them. Bella was sitting with my mom who had her arms around her. Carlisle called my name as he took in my demeanor, I knew how crazy I must've looked but I didn't care, I needed to know and I couldn't wait a moment longer.

"Edward, what's wrong?"

I ignored him as I struggled to keep my temper from getting the better of me. I took hold of Bella's arm as I dragged her from my mom's hold and attempted to take her outside where at least we would have some privacy

"Get your hands off me." She hissed as she fought against me.

"You want to do this here? Really Bella, you want to do this in front of my parents?"

"Well seeing as I have no idea what you are referring to, then yes. I really don't want to be alone with you right now."

I snapped back. "Fine. I am just wanting to know where you get off telling me that I am all the evil bastards under the sun for having a one night stand with someone I thought I would never see again, yet you seemed to think nothing of jumping into bed with first man who paid you attention. There was more than one from what I have been told, but just how many were there Bella?"

The look on her face was one of shock. "I have no idea what you are talking about." She said, a blush creeping up her cheek. That told me that I wasn't too far off the mark. Bella's 'tell' when she was trying to keep something from me was that blush so I pressed on.

"What I want to know from you was how does it feel to have fucked the man who kidnapped me? To know that you were in his bed while I was fighting for my life, fighting to get back to you." I paused for a moment before I added the second charge I could level at her. "Or how you were so close to forgetting me altogether and letting Riley Biers take my place on a permanent basis. Maybe all the theatrics tonight were because you realized now that you had a great way to be rid of me so you can move him in, and still look like the innocent party. Bella the wronged and abandoned woman. Am I close?

"What? You really must've had a few too many hits to the head. I know Riley, but nothing happened between us we are friends, nothing more. Who's the other one are you referring to? There was no one in my bed while you were gone-"

"Were there so many that you can't remember? Okay so you say that nothing happened between you and Biers. I'll just have to take your word for that as he's probably in no fit state to confirm or deny that, not after I had finished with him anyway." I laughed at the thought of his body lying battered and bleeding on the concrete of the parking garage. I remembered Aro's anger thinking he had something to do with my comatose state. "Biers is probably dead by now."

Bella let out a small gasp, her eyes went wide and glassy as if she was fighting back tears. "What's wrong Bella?"

"Nothing, he's a friend that's it. Unlike you I don't have to have the first man that comes along and shows me any interest in my bed." She retorted.

I laughed once again. "Don't forget from what I was told there was more than just him. How about Aro? But that time it wasn't _your_ bed Bella. You went to his penthouse apartment after he met you in a bar one night."

"You asked me to meet you, but never showed up. I thought you didn't want me anymore."

I found myself shouting at her. "He set it all up, made you think I was going to meet you, which of course I couldn't as he had me prisoner. He showed up, played the knight in shining armor then he swept you off your feet, quite literally. Obviously I wasn't the most important thing on your mind then. All he needed to do was offer a shoulder to cry on, flash a bit of cash and you jump into bed with him. He knew things about you that he couldn't have known unless you'd been naked with him."

Bella muttered. "It wasn't like that, you made it sound so cheap."

Now the truth was out, I pushed on. "You crucify me for a mistake when I thought that we were over, yet you jump into bed with the psychopath who was holding me in underground cells and forcing me to fight for my life and freedom. I could understand it somewhat if you were trying to free me, but no. This was for fun, or for revenge on me for standing you up. You had no idea who he was, or what he was capable of and yet you went back to his apartment with him. I'm surprised that you made it out alive. Then again, maybe you were part of it."

The look on her face was one of shock and anger, Carlisle was holding standing in front of me, Emmett was at my side, his hand firmly on my arm. There was more to be said though, my brain was racing with the need to have this out there. I turned to Esme.

"You met him, had cozy lunch dates with the bastard too."

Carlisle snapped. "Watch your language Edward and show your mom some respect."

Her face fell as she looked between Bella and I. "What? No! I wouldn't have."

"You did, Bella introduced you to him. Have you taken on any new interior design contracts recently? Anyone needing a penthouse refurbishing? Then again I doubt that _she_ would have told you about how they met exactly." I spat.

Realization dawned as she knew who I was referring to. "You mean he is the same person that took you? Oh my god Edward!" Tears filled her eyes. "I didn't know, he was charming that's for sure. I did meet with him, several times infact but there was just something about him that I couldn't put my finger on. He called me to tell me that he wanted to hire me but never finalized the agreement." She stood and made her way to me, holding her arms out, taking me into her arms. "Baby, I'm sorry. If I had known there is no way I would ever have met him or considering taking blood money from him."

I found myself unable to comfort her, I was hurt by how the man who caused me so much pain had managed to fool my family. Deep down I knew that Esme was not to blame for believing that he was genuine. Bella, well she was another matter all together. Carlisle stepped forward and took Esme into his arms. Gently kissing the top of her head as he whispered reassurances to her before he led her back to the couch.

"See, I am not the only one who made mistakes, the difference is that I have paid for mine the hardest way possible. Bella would've continued to play the injured party, never admitting that she isn't as innocent as she likes to make out."

Bella was standing there, her mouth opening and closing. "What's up Bella, cat got your tongue?"

Carlisle spoke. "Son, calm down."

Then I realized that I was clenching and releasing my hands into fists. It was a subconscious action, but no one knew what would happen next and I was sure that this was putting them all on edge. I began to pace the room, watching as they all exchanged somewhat nervous glances.

My anger had not abated, this was dangerous territory for me, I knew that I could easily snap just as I had in the apartment. Luckily that only resulted in a broken mirror and minor cuts to my hand, if I didn't regain some control now the outcome could be far worse.

Some of the vitriol lacing my words. "You're all worried I'm going to lose it? Maybe I will, maybe I won't who knows. I mean none of you really know me anymore. I'm certainly not the person I was, he's gone. The old me died in those cells, the new me learned that if I wanted to survive then I had to be willing to do anything required of me no matter what the cost-"

"Get on your knees Cullen. Now!" The shout that interrupted my tirade cut through me, I instantly reacted, falling to my knees without giving it a second thought. My head fell forward as I waited for what was to come next. The only sound I heard was that of footsteps moving away from me and hushed whispers. Finally a pair of shoes appeared in my field of vision but no command followed, this was new. I waited, still nothing so I took a chance and looked up to find Emmett staring down at me. Anger flooded through me, how dare he do that to me. I got to my feet and pushed him hard in the chest.

"You bastard! How could you do that to me?" I screamed. "I'll kill you for that."

Emmett didn't try to stop me as I continued to push him, wanting to elicit a reaction from him.

"Really? You seriously think that you can take me on, and win?" He laughed before his face took on a serious look. "Bring it on, Cullen."

That was all I needed, fuelled by pure anger I took a swing at him, gasping in pain as my fist made contact with his jaw. He brought his hand to his face and rubbed where the contact had been. "Wow, you hit like girl Edward. I'm surprised that you managed to win any fights if that's all that you have to give. Are you sure that you were really fighting? Seems to me more like you were off at some heath spa-"

I silenced him with a quick succession of blows to his face, taking great delight as blood started to leak from his nose and mouth.

"Wow, you really think that I don't have it in me to fight you? I will show you just how wrong you are." I sneered. I drew my fist back to hit him again only feel my body go limp before I felt my legs buckle beneath me. "Wha-what did you do?" I muttered. Emmett caught me, taking me gently to the ground as Jasper stepped into view a somber look on his face.

"I'm sorry Edward, I did what I had to. You're out of control, you could easily have hurt any one of us your family, or even yourself. I gave you a muscle relaxant, nothing too heavy with what you've been through." He looked behind me and I heard Carlisle speak.

"The ladies are all going to a hotel overnight, I think that's for the best. They've been through enough for now." He then crouched down in front me. A weak smile played across his lips before he spoke to Emmett. "Can you get him upstairs? Use the master suite. I want to make sure that they get away okay."

I was carried upstairs, thrown unceremoniously over Emmett's shoulder before I was put down on the bed. I could hear Bella crying. Despite everything that had happened I didn't want to lose her. My anger tonight had been bottled up since I had returned, this had been bound to happen sooner or later but I never expected it to end up like this. I called out to her in a weak voice."Bella, Bella please?" But nothing came back. I was handed a glimmer of hope when the door opened, but it was just as quickly dashed when Carlisle walked in, sitting on the edge of the bed without speaking. He gave a small nod to Emmett who who left us alone.

Carlisle's disapproval was palpable, I knew that he would be upset at hearing the details of what had happened but I compounded that with my actions that followed. What did I really expect? I was mad at myself for how I had handled the fallout. How could I expect Bella to be okay with what had happened? I had hoped that she would see past that one fucked up crazy mistake that took me away from her and damn near killed me. Yes, she wasn't entirely innocent, but did she really do anything so wrong?

I couldn't face this right now, once again I had lost Bella, only this time, it was my fault. I closed my eyes and gave into the false feeling of calm that the relaxant gave me. What I needed for the morning was a calm and clear head. Then, and only then could I think about sitting down with Bella and trying to rescue something from the mess that I had created. Maybe when she had time to think this through she would want to talk to me. I still loved her and I hoped that she still loved me.

"Edward, we will talk in the morning. You need to rest tonight, we all need a good night's sleep. If you need me I will be downstairs, okay?"

I nodded before I buried my face into the pillow and let the tears I had been had holding back fall. I had known that reliving the nightmare would be hard, but I never expected it to tear my world apart once again.

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><p><strong>Authors Note:<strong>

Well firstly please accept my apologies, I am SO sorry it has taken me so long to update, but the good news is that I have a few chapters 'banked' of this now as was my aim before I updated again. Please accept my apologies for the delay, I know that I left it on a cliffhanger.

HUGE thanks go out to Leigh Warner who is the pre reader on this. I am still missing Steph as my beta so the words and any mistakes are mine.

Taken has once again been nominated in the Energize WIP awards, voting is open if you feel like voting for me then please Google them and cast your vote.


	29. Picking Up The Pieces

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or any of these characters. No copyright infringement is intended**

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><p>Light flooded through the window and hurt my eyes, I put my arm over my face to block out the brightness before I rolled over to curl up to Bella, but the bed was cold and empty. Then it all came crashing back to me. Last night, my revelation about what had happened to me my confession, the arguments that ensued. Dragging myself out of bed I knew that I would have to face the consequences of my actions last night sooner rather than later and there really was no time like the present.<p>

Pausing at the top of the stairs I could hear voices, my father, Emmett and Jasper were all talking in slightly hushed tones but just enough to carry through the open plan house.

"You need me to take a look at your jaw Em? Looks kinda sore." Jasper said.

Emmett chuckled. "Nah, this should take the swelling down. I just never expected him to be able to hit that hard, there was some serious power behind it."

"Just keep the ice pack on it, and don't goad him any further. He isn't the person we knew before… before those horrible things that happened to him…" I could hear Carlisle's words as they caught in his throat.

"Dad, he did what he had to. From what he said he had no choice. I just want to track down this sick fucker and his associates. I hated pulling that stunt on him last night, but I had no choice. It was scary shit seeing him react like a trained animal when I gave him a command. It was wrong of me and I felt sick to my stomach, but he looked like he was going to hurt someone. Shit, he must've been terrified. I should apologize to him."

I zoned out as I remembered, Emmett shouting at me to get on my knees and how I obeyed without question or giving it a moment though. I just did as he commanded. That sent a chill through me. I thought that I had left all that behind me, but it was like being back there, being Aro's puppet in his sick game of revenge.

I turned on my heel and only just made it to the bathroom where I heaved the contents of my stomach into the toilet bowl. Once I was done I managed to drag myself off the floor to the sink where I splashed cold water onto my face before I finally looked at myself in the mirror. As I stood there examining the man staring back at me, not for the first time I felt repulsion toward him. His face looked haggard, there was more than a slight five o'clock shadow there. The eyes were lifeless, slighly sunken, with dark rings underneath them. He looked like shit, like he didn't care about anyone or anything. My own words from last night ringing in my ears. I wasn't the man they knew anymore, it was true when I said he was gone and never coming back. But could I live with the new me?

Trying to put on a brave face I rinsed my mouth with a capful of the mouthwash on the side of the sink to try and remove the taste of my vomit. Finally I was ready to face them, or as ready I was going to be so I made my way downstairs, knowing that I would have to face what was the come. Last night had been a turning point and not in a good way. I hadn't meant for everything to come out like that, but maybe it was for the best. There would be no more secrets now, everything was out in the open. The last thing I wanted was lose Bella after fighting hard for so long to get back to her, she had been my reason to fight, to live and if I didn't have her then there was no reason for me to be here.

Walking into the kitchen I paused at the counter while I waited for my family to acknowledge me. My father turned around first, Emmett and Jasper both left when he nodded to them, obviously he had said that he wanted to be alone with me when I finally surfaced. He waited until we were alone before he spoke.

"Edward, how are you feeling this morning?" He indicated to his coffee mug, silently asking if I wanted one.

I nodded before I answered. "I'm confused, I need to talk to Bella. Where is she staying?"

Carlisle stared at me. "I'm not sure that I should tell you, she wanted some time."

"Time? Time! Was the last few months not enough time for her to think?" My voice was beginning to rise in anger.

"Son, you need to be calm down, she won't talk to you if she thinks that you are likely to react like you did last night."

"Like what? I'm fine." With that I slammed the coffee mug on the counter, causing it to smash.

Carlisle just raised his eyebrows at me. "This is what I mean. Last night was hard for all of us, but it was hardest on you, reliving the whole ordeal. I think it's for the best if you check back into the clinic and get some help."

I began to talk over him. "No! I won't go back there, you just want to lock me away." I turned away from him, walking to the French doors where I stared out over the beach. "I can't face being away from you all, I need you. I need Bella, I'll go crazy if I can't see her. She was my reason to live, to fight. I put everything I had into getting out of that hellhole and back to her. Bella is my reason for living, without her I am nothing. They may as well put a bullet in my head if I have to face this without her."

"What if she doesn't want you back? You said some pretty hurtful things last night, things I never thought that any son of mine would come out with. But in hindsight you both said hurtful things. I think that the best thing for you is to take some time apart to work out where you want to go from here."

"You don't get it do you?" I shouted. "I can't do it. I won't! We have spent enough time apart, I just need her. I…I love her." Sobs fell from me and I saw my brother standing at Carlisle's shoulder ready to protect him from me, Jasper who was standing just behind him, discreetly left us heading out towards the beach. I knew that he didn't want to be caught in the middle of this, he was concerned about me, but needed to keep his professional opinions and his private ones separate. I understood and respected that.

Then I heard a voice that I didn't expect, the soft tone of her voice cut through the silence.

"I know you love me Edward, but I'm not sure it's enough."

My tear filled eyes met hers as I turned toward Bella. I could see that she hadn't slept well, if at all. I wanted to go to her, take her in my arms before I fell to my knees before her and begged for forgiveness, yet I couldn't move and she stood before me, looking every it as broken as I was.

Her voice became firm as she spoke again. "Carlisle, Emmett, can you leave us please." It wasn't a request but more of a a command.

"I'm not happy leaving you two alone, emotions are still running a little high I fear." Carlisle edged.

Bella's eyes left mine. "I can take care of myself Carlisle, he won't hurt me. No physically anyway."

Emmett put his hand on Carlisle's shoulder. "We'll be right outside, okay?" Bella nodded and all I could do was watch them leave.

Silence settled around us, it was uncomfortable but I wasn't sure what to say to her. Bella just stood there, arms folded tightly across her chest as she stared out of the door that was left open when Emmett left.

Finally, she let out a deep breath, her eyes remained fixed on the doors. "So, you wish they'd put a bullet in your brain?" She turned to me, a hardness settled in her eyes. "Right now Edward, so do I."

"Bella, please." I sobbed.

"No. There will be no more begging for second, third or fourth chances. You hurt me Edward, really fucking hurt me last night. It wasn't just finding out about that slut and the bastard child you fathered, it was how you think you can hold me up as your savior, your salvation, then when you find out that I'm not perfect, rather like you aren't, you rip me apart and paint me as some kind of whore in front of your family. I searched for you, I cried oceans of tears while you were gone, not knowing what had happened to you. I identified bodies at the morgue, each time praying that I wouldn't be your face that was waiting to greet me under the white sheet. I never knew if I should be happy that it wasn't you as it meant you were still out there, or sad as it meant you were staying away from me and some other family had lost someone they were missing. Right now, I hate you with every fiber of my being. Esme of course thinks I should forgive you for your indiscretion. That's what she called it, I call it a huge fucking mistake, and the last one you have the chance to make where I am concerned."

She paused to take several breaths. The whole time she spoke I could hear the anger rising from within her.

"Bella, listen to me, let me explain." I begged.

"No! I have listened to enough of your lies Edward, now you have to listen to me. What if I did have sex with Aro? He was kind to me, I was for some stupid reason missing you like crazy. When you stood me up the night I met him, or that's what I thought had happened. Just having someone pay me compliments, make me feel like I was important, show me affection and not look at me like I was about to fall apart at any given moment was a huge plus for me. Yes, I wanted him, I wanted to fuck him and forget you if only for one night. Just a few hours where I wasn't the pathetic person who sat at home in one of your old shirts and cried herself to sleep. It was great to be wanted by someone, even if it wasn't who I loved. But you see Edward, you have thrown it all awy."

"You… you didn't have sex with him?" I stuttered.

Her lip curled as she shook her head in disgust at me. "No Edward I didn't, because unlike you I don't go out and fuck the first person who pays me some attention when shit goes down between us."

"But he said…"

"I don't care what he told you! _I_ know what happened that night, or what didn't happen more to the point. Yet you judge me by your own weak standards. Riley? Now he was a different story."

"You _did_ sleep with him? I knew I was right!" I was furious.

"Maybe I did, maybe didn't. Not that it's anything to do with you." She spat . " I should leave, there isn't anything more to say."

I fell to my knees. "Please Bella, please? I can't do this without you. I need you. You can't leave me."

She walked toward me crouching down and taking my face in her hands, bringing our faces so they were level. Her eyes searched mine before her lips touched mine briefly. This wasn't over, not if she was kissing me. Then the kiss deepened on both our parts, my hands found her face and I held it gently, afraid that I would hurt her even without meaning to. Eventually she pulled back from me, resting her forehead against mine. Breathy words fell from her mouth. "I need some time to think things through, can you give me that?"

I nodded frantically. "I will wait as long as it takes for you."

Bella nodded before she got to her feet. I'm going back to the apartment, please don't come back there. You can stay with your folks, or Emmett, but please don't come back home just yet. Okay?"

"Anything, anything that you say I will do. I just want to make things right between us, I want to show you how sorry I am."

A smile graced her lips as she looked at me, "Then give me what I am asking for." I watched as she turned and walked away from me, my heart leapt as she paused at the door. "Emmett will bring my things back, I'm taking the car so they will have to give you a ride back."

"Okay." Was all I could think to say, as the door closed behind her I called out. "I love you." But I'm not sure if she heard.

Carlisle and Emmett came back inside, they looked as if they knew already, of course I guessed that they already did. Rose would have called Emmett and my mom would've spoken to my dad. This was confirmed when Carlisle asked. "So where do you want to stay. With us, or Emmett and Rose?"

I thought about it for a few moments before I answered. "Can I come home dad?"

A wide smile broke out on his face. "Of course you can son, your mom will be pleased."

He took me in his arms, holding me to him. I knew that this would be the start of a long road to redemption, but I would do anything and I mean anything to make sure that I didn't lose Bella after everything that I had been through to get here.

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><p><strong>Authors Note:<strong>

First of all, if you want to abuse me and make threats, please at least have the guts to sign in so that I can reply to you, otherwise, move along.

Thank you to everyone who reviewed and those that I cannot reply to as you are guests, thanks for your reviews, I do like to reply to them so if you have an account please do sign in so I can say hi. I really love hearing how you all react to what I have posted, usually you are all grabbing pitchforks at the moment.

Massive thanks go out to Leigh Warner for being my faithful pre-reader on this fic. There is no beta at the moment, so any mistakes are mine.


	30. Moving Forward

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or any of these characters. No copyright infringement is intended**

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><p>After we left the beach house I pretty much resembled a zombie. Once back at my parents house I walked around, barely speaking to anyone unless required to. I ended up only coming out of my bedroom when I needed to eat. Finding some comfort however small, at being being back here. This was where I always felt safe and secure as a child. The thing hurting me was Bella wasn't here, she wasn't coming either. She had asked for space and time, and it physically hurt me to stay away from her, after being apart from her for so long. Deep down I knew I had to respect her wishes if there was to be any hope for us.<p>

I wasn't sleeping properly, thanks to having recurring, vivid nightmares I was woken from usually covered in a cold sweat and gasping for breath. Once awake I was so badly shaken that I just couldn't bear to close my eyes again. The only way to avoid having them was to stay awake.

Being here caused unexpected memories of us to flood my mind. I thought about the first time I brought her home and gave her the guided tour, which was interrupted when we made out on my childhood bed. Things got wildly out of hand and we ended up trying to have silent sex, which was almost impossible . Once we were respectable, we headed back downstairs looking slightly flushed. Of course Carlisle knew what we had been doing, he gave me a knowing smile as he teased me my jeans being open, which they weren't. Bella blushed furiously as she was embarrassed at the thought of him knowing what we had been doing.

Everywhere I looked there were reminders of her, of us. In the lounge there were several framed photographs of us together proudly displayed, our love was obvious. Yet now it was gone, possibly forever. I was holding one of them, staring at the happy couple captured forever in a moment of happiness, we didn't have that any longer. My fingers gently brushed over her face when a voice spoke behind me. "Edward, there you are." I dropped the frame as I was startled by Esme. It fell onto the stone fireplace and smashed into a thousand pieces. We both went to our knees to pick up the pieces. I felt like I couldn't do anything right. Esme's hands pushed mine out of the way as she attempted to take over. Frustration rushed through me, I was more than capable of picking up some pieces of glass without help.

"It's fine, I've got this." I snapped, but she continued trying to help. Eventually I lost what was remaining of my control. "I said I can manage! I'm not fucking incapable!"

Standing up I turned away from her, afraid that I would say something more. I listened as she continued to gather up the shattered glass. Carlisle was standing in the doorway. "Edward, I need to talk to you." I looked back at Esme as she froze in place. "Come outside, I could do with some fresh air." I followed him out into the garden wondering what he wanted to say to me. We stood outside in silence, I didn't know what to say, this was his idea so I waited for him to say what was clearly on his mind.

"I know we haven't really discussed this, but I think now it's time we did." He took a deep breath before he vocalized the thoughts in his mind. "We need to call the Police, tell them what you know about your abduction. The detective that-"

Fear gripped me. "No! I can't. It's not safe. They will come for me, if they find me they will kill me." I grabbed onto him as I pleaded my case. My hands clawed at his arms as I sank to my knees. "I can't go through that again, I can't. They might go for Bella, I need to get to her." The thought of Bella being hurt had me on my feet and sprinting toward the house, my mind running at a million miles an hour.

I could hear Carlisle's voice as he called out to me. "Edward! Edward, stop! Come back son. Please?" I stopped in my tracks as I heard his voice crack with emotion. Turning to face him I saw the strain of the last few months etched so clearlyon his face.

"I'm sorry, I just… Please?" I begged.

Carlisle nodded. "Okay son, no Police. I'm sorry, I just thought you would want to see justice served on those monsters." He closed the distance between us, taking me in his arms. I was shaking as the emotions poured out of me.

I sobbed "They will kill you, I know it sounds crazy but he will stop at nothing to get what he wants. I shouldn't have got out of there, he wanted me to continue to fight. I know I messed up, I made a mistake, a fucking huge one and it caused all these problems. I'm sorry, I wish I could take it all back."

He held me while I let out everything that I was feeling. I needed to talk to someone, and knew Dr Newton would be the best placed person, he would listen and not judge me. The last thing I needed was feeling like someone else was judging me. Finally when I was able, I pulled away from Carlisle. "Can you get me an appointment with Dr Newton as soon as possible?"

His answer was gentle and I knew he was comforted by the knowledge I wanted to talk to someone. "Of course, I will call him now. Why don't you go and rest, I will call you when he gets here."

I nodded and headed back to my childhood bedroom where I curled up in a ball on the bed and waited. I must've drifted off to sleep as I was woken by hearing voices outside my door. I didn't fly into the normal panic I might have previously at this surprise, that was some comfort although I had no idea if this was a positive change or not. Standing at the door, I opened it slightly so I could make out what was being said. I could hear Emmett talking to my dad as they headed, I assumed, downstairs. They were discussing me so I followed them, making sure that I stayed out of sight, hugging my back to the walls.

As they walked into my father's office the door remained ajar so I could hear everything.

"He was a mess at the beach house, are you sure that being here is the best thing for him? I am also thinking about you and mom. You have to consider your own safety in all this."

Carlisle snapped. "He is my son." His tone mellowed somewhat. "Just as you are. I would do anything either of you. I would lay down my own life if that was what it took to keep you safe and out of harms way."

Emmett replied. "I know you would, but I've seen and experienced first hand more than once what he is capable of. He could easily hurt you without it registering in his brain until the damage was done. It's like he vanishes and someone else takes over, if only for a split second, but that is all it will take. I have never seen it before. He needs help, professional help. The kind you just cannot give him that no matter how hard you try, or how much you want to. Edward is like a bomb waiting to go off, and it's only a matter of time before it blows up in your face."

They were silent for a moment before Carlisle spoke once again. "Have you spoken to him yet?"

Emmett let out a loud sigh. "I haven't. I don't know where to start. I shouldn't have done that to him, but I was really concerned that he was going to lash out. His eyes were wild with anger. It was the only way I could think of to get him to stop." He paused before continuing. "They really did a number on him didn't they? I wish I could get my hands on those sick bastards."

"I know you didn't mean anything by it you did what you had to Emmett. I'm sure that if you sit down with him and explain, he will understand. Nothing you did was out of hate, no matter how it sounded or looked at the time. " Carlisle's voice was full of compassion.

"I just want my brother back,."

Listening to him, I knew what Emmett was saying came from a place of love and concern. I appreciated he wanted to make it right with me, but right now all I could think of was he thought I could hurt my parents. I wouldn't, would I? I could feel my fists opening and closing as a reflexive action. I itched to go in there, to tell him he was wrong, I was okay. But I knew deep down the fact I wanted to do it was laced with anger and a rage that was bubbling within me, meaning he was right. Taking several deep breaths I stood in the hallway blocking out what else they were talking about. Fight or flight, they were my options, and before I could react on the more dangerous of them, I grabbed Carlisle's car keys from the hall table and sprinted out of the house.

The door slammed loudly behind me, once I was outside the world seemed to swim before my eyes. All I knew was that I had to put some space between me and them. My hands fumbled as I frantically pressed the buttons on the key fob to open the car door, finally I saw the hazard light flash, indicating hat I had managed it. I jumped behind the wheel, slipping the key into the ignition, turning it and hearing the engine roar to life. Clutching the steering wheel in my hands I could feel the pressure my grip was exerting on it, but I didn't care. I wanted to be away from here where people expected me to explode in their faces.

I had no idea where I was going to go, other than away from here. The sudden movement of Carlisle and Emmett appearing in the doorway spurred me into action, my foot hitting the gas pedal as the car lurched forward. Emmett shouted after me, but I didn't stop.

The feeling of complete freedom was exhilarating but terrifying at the same time. I drove through the quiet streets of my parents neighborhood not thinking about where I was headed, I just followed my instinct.

The streets were familiar as the suburban sprawl gave way to the built up city. The car came to a stop almost of its own volition and I looked out toward the building before me and I knew where I was. My heart had brought me back to her, I was home.

Taking a few deep breaths to calm myself I finally found the courage to open the door and step out of the vehicle. I brushed through the people on the sidewalk and into the apartment building lobby. Once inside I pressed the call button on the elevator repeatedly, as if I thought the action would bring it to me any sooner. The concierge on the door was staring at me, I was sure that he knew who I was but I couldn't remember him. He took a step toward me, I could feel his presence as he drew closer, his slow and deliberate steps were designed not to alert me to his approach, but I knew better. I willed the elevator to get here, afraid that I might have to defend myself against his expected attack, He could easily be one of Aro's henchmen who was stationed here, waiting to take me back.

The display showed that the elevator car was finally here, just as the doors opened I felt a hand reach out and make contact with my arm. Panic ripped through me as I turned to face him, acting on pure instinct, my right fist made contact with his jaw. I watched as he fell to the floor before I bolted inside. I pushed the button for the floor our apartment was on, waiting for the doors to close so I could make my escape.

Once the elevator arrived on the floor I ran out of the car and towards our apartment. Then I realized that I didn't have my key, I knocked on the door praying Bella would be home.

There was commotion coming from the direction of the elevators. This spurred me on and I banged my fists on the door. "Bella! Bella! Let me in please? It's me, Edward." I could hear movement inside, she was here, mere feet from me but yet she wouldn't open the door to me.

"Bella!" Voices were getting closer and I was starting to panic. My fists continued to hammer on the door. "Let me in please! They are here, they found me! I tried, I really did. Don't let them take me back, I can't do it again." My fists pounded on the door in a desperate attempt to get it to open, but to no avail. I could hear people approaching me, the muted sound of their footsteps on the carpet. That was when I gave in, falling to my knees as my hands dragged down the door. Sobbing , I knew there was nothing more I could do as I choked out her name what for I feared may be the last time. "Bella, please."

A hand gently touched my shoulder and I pulled away from the contact, knowing that there was nowhere for me to go. I was trapped, they had found me and there was no reason left for me to fight it. I would just have to deal with what was to come. I shouted to her one final time before they took me away for what I expected to be the last time. "Bella, I love you!"

Hands that I expected to be rough with me, were gentle and caring, turning me to face the person who was stood over me. I instinctively shielded my face, the longer that I could leave it before I set eyes on them once again the better. But the voices I heard were not the ones I expected. It was Emmett I heard talking to me. "Hey, calm down. It's okay Edward, we're not going to hurt you. No one is. We're here to help." Then I heard Carlisle talking.

"No! Stay back please. He's my son, he's upset and confused. Edward has been through a terrible ordeal recently. I assure you he didn't mean to hurt you, but you need to give us some space, please?"

Nervously I looked out from behind my hands where I saw the face of my father in front of me. He was wearing a concerned expression on his face. "Hey there. You gave us quite a fright taking off like that."

"I'm sorry." Was all I could say.

"It's okay son, we just need to get you home. Do you think you can manage to get down to the car if we make sure that the path is clear?"

I nodded before getting to my feet once again. "Bella?" I asked. Emmett turned away.

"She won't see you right now, you gave her quite a scare turning up like this, banging on the door. She'll be okay though, Alice is on her way over now." Carlisle wrapped his arm around my shoulder and began to lead me away.

We made it down to the car with no one in our way, it was like the place was deserted, even the sidewalk was spookily empty. Amazing what could happen when you put your mind to it, and I wasn't sure who had made this happen but I was grateful.

The car ride back to my parents was silent. I sat in the back of the car huddled against my father while my brain raced at a million miles an hour. I really did think that they had found me once again. The terror that I felt was immense at the thought of never seeing my family or Bella again, but if that was my fate, then I would've accepted it.

Pulling into the drive I moved away from Carlisle and saw there was a strange car parked up. My eyes shot to Carlisle's and instinctively I began to panic, wondering who was here, if they were someone I could trust or not. I scrambled to find the door handle, but Carlisle's hand covered mine. "The car, who's here? I..I." My breathing was short and labored.

Immediately he began reassuring me. "It's okay, I know who it is. The car over there. "He pointed an my eyes followed. "It belongs to Dr Newton. Remember you wanted to see him? Well he said he would come over. With what happened, I forgot. "

I nodded, of course he would drop everything to see me, the most fucked up patient on his books. Getting out of the car I walked slowly toward the house. I knew that I had to be honest with him, tell him how I was feeling and what my fears were without holding anything back. Then and only then would I be able to move on to hopefully reclaim and rebuild the tattered remnants of my life.

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><p><strong>Authors Note:<strong>

Thank you to everyone who reviewed and those that I cannot reply to as you are guests, thanks for your reviews, I do like to reply to them so if you have an account please do sign in so I can say hi. Your support on this story really does mean a lot to me. Updates will be quicker, I know I have said that before, and right now I have the next two chapters written and with my wonderful pre-reader Leigh for her to look over.

Massive thanks go out to Leigh Warner for being my faithful pre-reader on this fic. There is no beta at the moment, so any mistakes are mine.


	31. Onward & Upward

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or any of these characters. No copyright infringement is intended**

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><p>Three weeks passed, three long and tortuous weeks in which I didn't see or hear from Bella. I still had my sessions with Doc Newton. He poked and prodded around inside my head until it hurt and I couldn't stand it any longer. Maybe it was because I finally opened up and let him help me by telling him what was really happening. I just kept telling myself, it's for the best.<p>

It was clear from my little display at the apartment that I wasn't coping as well I thought. It wasn't fair on anyone to ask them to live with me like this, even I struggled to look at myself in the mirror and like the person that was staring back at me.

Doc Newton really was helping me make progress, I could understand where I had failed Bella and my feelings centered around my desperate need to make things right between us. I learned that just expecting her to fall in line just because I said 'sorry', was not going to make everything alright. There was no magic wand that could be waved and erase the past. We had to deal with it, and only then could we attempt to move forward with our futures. I argued how could we do this if Bella wasn't prepared to talk to me? Doc Newton told me that he would be speaking to her about some one on one sessions with him, with a possibility of future counseling sessions together. Me? I leapt at the chance but I knew not to get my hopes up too high I had put Bella through so much, but just the faintest glimmer of hope that she might one day be able to forgive me was enough to keep me going.

Carlisle put some new rules in place at the house. He told people couldn't just turn up unannounced, all visitors had to call in advance and ensure he knew they were coming. For the people who were unexpected he would only allow them inside if he knew them, of course ensuring that I was aware of who was in the house at all times. I felt bad, knowing that people were changing their normal life for me, but at the same time I was grateful.

Emmett and I talked, he explained how he felt like shit for his command at the beach house. Rose had given him hell on top of his own guilt complex. I told him that I forgave him, and understood. In l honesty I remembered very little of what happened before I found myself on my knees with my entire family staring at me in shock.

As we talked it was decided that I needed a form of release for the anger I had bubbling inside me. He started by taking me jogging on a morning building up my exposure to being outside. We would set off at 5am, running the deserted streets of the neighborhood. After a few days when I was sure that I could handle it we added another element. The jogging was followed by a trip to his friend's gym. We were allowed to work out in there alone before he opened the doors to everyone else. Yet another adjustment made for his fucked up brother. I hated the fact that people had to change their plans and make special arrangements for me.

The workout sessions were good, they helped me and gave me a much needed release, the Punchbag was where I took out most of my pent up frustration and it soon became my best friend.

Today was different though, Emmett was working away and I would be alone. I knew that this would be harder as I had promised myself that I would do this alone. It was the first step on my road to recovery although it was a small one, but that it needed to be made. Walking out of the front door I put my earphones in, keeping the volume down to a minimum. Having it there as as a background would keep me focused. I'd been running for about 20 minutes when a black SUV drove past me. Instantly it got my attention, but I tried not to let it bother me. I continued on my route, watching as it disappeared from sight. I knew such a reaction was stupid, it was only a car. Then as I turned the final corner to head home I saw the car parked outside, as I approached it sped off. I couldn't see the license plate clearly but I knew that something was wrong.

Running into the house I went from room to room, everything was in place, nothing was wrong. The rational part of me knew that I was over reacting but I couldn't quiet the tiny voice in the back of my head that told me that the car could easily have been Aro or one of his henchmen, they knew where I was and now they had come for me. I walked into the kitchen to get a bottle of water from the fridge and nearly collided with my mom in the doorway. She was carrying a large vase of white lilies which she almost dropped.

"Edward, I didn't know that you were home. How was your run?" She breezed past me towards to lounge.

"It was good, strangle to be out there on my own though" Once I had the bottle of water in my hand I followed her. Watching from the doorway as she fussed over the flowers, making sure that they were all just right, it brought a rare smile to my face. "You always manage to make that look so easy."

She turned to me. "Well, it's easy when you buy me such beautiful flowers."

My eyes snapped instantly to her, "I didn't buy you flowers mom. Where did they come from?"

Without missing a beat. "The doorbell rang and they were on the doorstep. Then you arrived back. I thought that maybe you were not waiting to admit that they were from you."

I began to pace the floor, the car and now the flowers. This was not a coincidence, nothing ever was.

"Where would I get flowers from? I went for a run." It was hard to stop myself shouting, it seemed to clear to me something was very wrong.

Mom just shrugged it off. "Well perhaps your father decided to surprise me. He is an old romantic at heart, and he does know how much I love Lillies."

I reached for the phone, holding it out to her. "Call him." She brushed the phone away so I pressed her further. "Call and ask if he sent you those flowers."

She frowned at me. "I don't understand why this is so important, they are only flowers."

"Please? Do this for my own sanity, I need to know."

"Okay darling, but how silly am I going to look when he tells me that he sent me flowers."

Esme took the phone from me and dialled. The moments as I waited for the call to be answered I swear that my heart stopped beating.

"Hello Darling… Yes I know you're working but I needed to call you… Yes, yes Edward is okay. He is the reason that I am calling… Please Carlisle, calm down, everything is okay here I promise. Now, did you send me some flowers today?... Ah, okay… Yes… No… Absoltutely… Yes I understand, now I'll explain when you get home… Love you too, see you soon."

I let out a deep breath when she turned to face me. "See! I told you it was nothing to worry about, the flowers are from your father, so there was no reason to get yourself all worked up. Now, why don't you go and get a shower after your run, and I will fix you some lunch. How does that sound?"

Leaning in to kiss her cheek I spoke. "Thanks for everything. Love you mom."

Dashing upstairs I took the stairs two at a time the sense of relief I felt was immense. Clearly the car outside was nothing for me to worry about. There was no way that I could continue to live my life in a state of perpetual fear, spending it looking over my shoulder as I waited for my word to come crashing down on me once again.

Once I had showered I made my way back downstairs to take Esme up on the offer of lunch. As I approached the kitchen door I could hear her talking in a hushed voice, obviously she didn't want me to hear what was being said. Creeping closer to the door I listened to what was being said.

"No, of course I haven't told him… I don't want to upset him, he was really wound up earlier about this… No! Don't come home, I'll deal with this in my own way… He's my son too, look I have to go I promised to make him some lunch. Love you."

My brain was racing. It sounded as if she had been talking to my father, but what was she keeping from me?"

Pushing the kitchen door open I made her aware of my presence. "What's for lunch? I'm famished." She jumped at my sudden appearance, a look of pure guilt crossing her face.

"Oh, erm I haven't done anything yet, I didn't think you would be down here so quickly." She walked over to the fridge and looked inside

I found myself muttering. "That much was obvious."

"Sorry did you say something?" She said over her shoulder.

"No, nothing."

Looking around I spotted that the kitchen door was open, that was something that never happened. So instinctively I went to close it. Through the opening I could see a large bouquet of flowers sitting at the side of the garbage can. Curious, I opened the door and saw there was still a card nestled in amongst the blooms. I pulled it free and read the words on the card.

"_To my darling wife. I love you more than you will ever know, having you in my life makes me complete. My world begins and ends with you. Love always Carlisle x x "_

The card was soon crushed in my hand as I feel the anger rage inside me. Turning around I walked towards Esme as she was depositing various containers on the counter as she bustled around the kitchen. I stood motionless next to the counter as I waited for her look at me.

"Edward, what's wrong darling?" She asked as she searched my face for answers.

"I don't know, I was hoping that you could tell me." My voice was calm, too calm as I tried to keep myself under control. She frowned at me. "Do you need me to remind you?"

I slammed the now crumpled card onto the counter making her visibly jump.

"Oh,"

"Is that all you have to say? Oh?" I asked, my voice adopting a dangerous edge.

"I can explain Edward, please?" She was trying to keep the emotion from carrying into her voice, but it was no use.

"Explain what? How you got flowers from your husband and yet they are sitting outside like garbage? Or how those lilies that you were so thrilled to receive earlier today, cannot be from him, Yet, I bet if I went into the lounge, then I would find them proudly on display still. Even though you don't know who they are from."

I didn't wait for an answer as I darted from the kitchen to the lounge. I was right, they were sitting in one of the beautiful cut crystal vases on the fireplace. I felt sick seeing them, my instinct kicked in and with a roar from my chest I rushed toward it, grasping the vase in my right hand before I launched it toward the wall. Watching with a sense of satisfaction as the crystal shattered before the flowers fell to the ground.

Hearing Esme gasp behind me she called out. "Edward, please."

That got me to turn my attention to her. "You were going to lie to me! I heard you on the phone, who were you talking to? Was it them? Are you in on this whole elaborate plan to drive me crazy? Or maybe you want me gone again. Yeah that's it you want me out of your lives, it must've been so much easier when I wasn't around."

Watching her face as I threw the harsh words at her should have told me that I was wrong, how my words were hurtful, but it didn't. I stepped closer to her preparing for the next barrage to fall from my mouth, only they didn't. I felt a sharp slap across my cheek as her hand made contact with it.

"How dare you speak to me like that Edward. You have no idea how your being gone was hard for all of us. You went through hell, well so did we, Only our hell didn't have walls or guards. Ours was living here everyday not knowing what had happened to you, if you were alive or dead. Supporting Bella through her heartbreak, listening to her defend you, saying that there was no way you would have left her like that. You know something? I believed her. I didn't raise you to be a coward who would walk out on her."

Esme turned and walked away from me, leaving me standing there shell shocked.

"I almost wish that you had left her, that you had found someone else and were living in a new city. That way you would be happy , having never suffered at the hands of that monster. You wouldn't be the person that lashes out at people without thinking and hurts them with words and actioned. I don't know you right now Edward."

I sank onto the couch, head in my hands as her words filtered into my brain. I felt the couch dip next to me and her arm wrapped around me, pulling me toward her. "I want my son back."

A strangled cry escaped me as I let out the emotions, sobs wracked my chest as I let out what I was feeling inside. Her words bouncing around my head, I knew that she didn't say those things to hurt me, only to make me see how wrong I was.

I must have cried until I fell asleep as I only stirred slightly when I heard the soft voice of my father. I feigned sleep to hear what was said when they thought I wasn't listening.

"What happened? Why is there glass on the floor?" He sounded concerned.

"Sssh! He's been asleep since it happened. He found out about the flowers, and he… he got upset." Esme whispered. " I didn't know what to do, he was so angry. Edward found the flowers outside, the ones you sent. I couldn't lie to him about it."

"I know darling, it was never going to work out. There was no way that we could keep this from him. I tried to get out of work to come home so we could do this together, but something came up. I'm sorry." Carlisle sounded like he was trying to hold back the emotion in his voice, "I wish things were different, I really do, but in all honesty we can't change the past but we can be here for his future.

I opened my eyes, pulling myself upright. "I know that there are only so many times I can say this before you lose patience with me, but I am sorry. There are no excuses for how I reacted today, it's just…" I struggled to find the words.

Carlisle placed his hand on my shoulder. "I know son. But you have to know that we are not your enemies here, we only want you get through this."

Smiling at him I knew that my parents would do anything they could to help me. I was going to answer, but the sound of the phone ringing interrupted me. Esme answered it.

"Hello?" She rose to her feet, discreetly walking away from me and dropping her voice but I could still hear her. "Yes I'm still here… No! Please calm down… No it wasn't him I can promise you that… How do I know? You mean apart from the fact that he is my son? I know because I had some delivered here earlier today… Call Emmett, he will come and stay with you, or send someone over if he can't get there. He will make sure you're okay, or you can come here… No, of course I understand. Let me know when you have spoken to Emmett… Okay my darling."

As she turned around to face us, the panic was clear on her face. Carlisle went straight to her side. "What happened?"

"No secrets, please." I begged.

She nodded slowly. "Okay, no secrets. It was Bella on the phone, she was calling as she got a delivery today. White lilies. She was calling to ask you not to contact her again and not to send her flowers. I told her that they weren't from you, and how I knew."

I was on my feet and charging toward the door."I have to protect her, they are doing this to goad me, they must know that I am alive. Shit! This is all my fault."

"Edward, stop!" Carlisle's voice made me stop in my tracks. "There is nothing you can do, going over there will only aggravate things. She has said that she doesn't want to see you. Let me deal with this."

There was nothing I wanted more than to run to her, to hold her in my arms and protect her. But the harsh reality was that this was my fault, I had brought this to her door, however I had no idea how to make this right.

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><p><strong>Authors Note:<strong>

Thank you to everyone who reviewed. Thanks to everyone for your support on this story really does mean a lot to me. I love the way that you all seem to have such strong views on this, and Bella – WOW you really don't like her at the moment do you?

Massive thanks go out to Leigh Warner for being my faithful pre-reader on this fic. There is no beta at the moment, so any mistakes are mine.


	32. Questions, Questions

Disclaimer: I do not own any of these characters, no copyright infringement is intended

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><p>Sitting and waiting to hear something, anything was hard. Carlisle said that he would call when he knew more. Looking at the clock that graced the fireplace it had been two hours. I mean really? How long should it take to get to the apartment and speak to Bella. My knee bounced nervously and I clasped my hands together in front of my face. Unable to sit down for any longer, I got to my feet.<p>

"Edward, please don't think about leaving." Esme's voice carried concern.

"I… I just can't sit here any longer. I have to know something." I answered as I began to pace. I could feel her eyes on me. "Can you stop staring, it's making me feel worse."

"Sorry, I can see how wound up you are about this, but your father and Emmett are there. Do you really think that they would let something happen to her?"

Of course she was right, it was just that my brain wasn't capable of thinking clearly at the moment.

I opened my mouth to answer her, but that was stopped by the sound of the front door opening and closing. I ran from the room out into the hallway to find both my father and brother standing there.

"What the fuck are you doing here? Where's Bella? Why are you not with her, those lunatics will be watching, waiting for their chance!"

"Edward, calm down. Bella is fine." Emmett placed his hands on my chest, stopping me from moving forward.

I pushed him away. "Get off me Emmett."

"Son, please? Let me explain, come into the lounge." Carlisle stepped between us and I nodded before I followed him.

Once inside I took a seat on the couch and watched as took a deep breath before speaking.

"Bella is okay, a little shaken by the thought of the flowers coming from them. I have spoken to the building doorman and he doesn't remember anything out of the ordinary when they were delivered. There was no florist's card with them so we have no way to trace back." He sighed. "There is nothing more than we can do right now."

"What? That madman sends flowers here and to Bella and there is nothing that we can do?" I feel the anger rise in me, and I fight to keep it under control.

"There is nothing that we can do, unless you want us to involve the Police?" Carlisle questions, already knowing what my answer will be. I feel three pairs of eyes fall me as I shake my head. "That's what I thought, Bella also doesn't want to involve them."

"Where is she now?" I need to know.

"My place." Emmett answers. "Rose is with her and I have one of the guys with them until I get back, just to be safe."

"Thank you." I mutter.

"She knows that this is linked to the Volturi. She's going to head out of town for a few day just until things settle."

The look of panic on my face is clear and Carlisle crouches down in front of me. "Son, it's for the best. You are here with us, no one can get to you here. Bella won't accept any help or additional protection, but she did agree to go spend a few days with Charlie and Sue."

"Great! So I can expect a phone call from a super pissed Charlie then." I knew although I was joking now, it would happen soon enough. She might be a grown up, but in his eyes Bella would always be his little girl and right now, I was the man who had broken her heart so badly.

Esme put her arm around me. "Darling, Charlie will understand."

I mutter under my breath. "I doubt it."

Emmett laughed, although he did his best to try and hide it. "Hey, I hate to be a party pooper but I have to get back to the apartment." He motioned toward the door.

I nodded. "Okay, tell Bella… " I can't finish the sentence as deep down I really don't know what to say.

Somehow he seemed to know as he said. "Don't worry, I'll tell her." With that he turned and left.

Once we were alone, I turned to Esme. "I really have fucked up haven't I?"

She nodded slowly. "Yes, you have. However, you are a Cullen and if there is one thing I know, it's that you will do anything to make this right. Bella still needs time to deal with what happened, she suffered every day that you were gone. Maybe not in the physical way that you did. But it was tearing her apart not knowing what had happened, or where you were. There is one thing that I know about Isabella Swan, and that is the love she felt for you didn't diminish one iota in the time you were gone." There was a long pause, and I knew there was more coming, so I waited watching as tears filled her eyes. "But your revelations hurt her so much, the thought of you being with another woman, fathering a child because of that one night. I cannot imagine how much it hurt her. Somewhere deep down inside I think she still loves you, but she needs some time to find it through the hurt she feels."

"I know, I would do anything and I mean anything to make it right. If I could go back and change what happened that night I would. Do you not think that I have thought about it every minute of every day since it happened?"

She looked at me as a serious expression. "I have a question to ask you Edward, and I would appreciate you being honest with me."

"Anything, just ask."

"Am I a grandma?" The words came out almost in a whisper. "I need to know."

Her words hit me like a punch in the gut, and trust me, I knew how they felt like from personal experience.

"No. From what I was told he wasn't happy with the thought of her being pregnant with my child, so he took care of it. I have no idea exactly what happened. I never saw her while I was there, no one talked about her." My voice dropped almost to a whisper. "I… I think he might have killed her."

Esme let out a gasp, her hands trembled as they flew to her face. "No! Edward, are you sure?"

"I can't be sure, but I remember him saying he took care of it. There is no way I can find out either. I wish there was."

Carlisle came into the room and saw the scene before him. He was at my mom's side, his arm wrapped around her as he pulled her to his chest.

The events of the day overwhelmed me, so I excused myself to go upstairs to try and sleep. As I lay there staring blindly at the ceiling, Esme's question about Heidi and the baby bothered me. Was she alive somewhere? I knew Aro had punished me in the worst way imaginable as he wanted me to live, if only to repay my debt to him. What was he capable of doing to the woman he loved, who shared his life and bed? Of course he was. She had betrayed him and if my punishment was deserved in his eyes, there was no telling he would do to her.

-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-

Darkness surrounded me, I recognized the smell, the damp, stale air that filled my lungs with each breath I took. There was the sound of voices carrying through the corridors and so I followed the noise. The hallways were deserted which was strange, and before long I found myself standing outside the office of the master. I was forced to eavesdrop at the door that was slightly ajar.

His voice was the first thing that I heard.

"You are a whore, nothing more and nothing less. I gave you everything. Everything! Yet this is how you chose to repay me." There was anger that laced his well chosen words.

Sobs broke out. "No, please. I… I…it was a mistake. Please.

A loud crack sounded quickly followed by the sound of a body hitting the floor.

"You don't get to ask me for anything." He hissed. "How much did he pay you? I mean whores are paid for laying on their backs and being fucked aren't they? Or maybe I am I wrong."

"Aro, can you forgive me? I will do anything to have your forgiveness ." The words fell between sobs.

"Take her from my sight." I could hear the sound of scuffles inside the room. The doors opened and I stood back so as to try and conceal my presence. I watched as she was dragged away by James and Felix Aro called after them. "Do with her as you please. When you are done and you have all had your… enjoyment from her. Make sure that you discreetly dispose of her and the bastard child!"

A heart curdling scream fell from her lips as she was taken away, but still I could hear the maniacal laughter of that madman as he condemned her.

Suddenly I sat upright in my bed, a sheen of sweat covered my brow as I gasped for air. It was a dream, only a dream or should that be a nightmare. It felt so real, just like the one I had where Bella had pulled the trigger on me. Looking at the clock it was early, or late depending entirely on how you looked at it. The red numbers taunted me, 2am and now there was no way I could possibly sleep now.

Thoughts of what might have happened to her because of me ran through my mind, I could think of nothing else. Whatever harm came to her would be on my conscience until the day I died.

I made my way downstairs and helped myself to a glass of Carlisle's finest malt, Sitting in the darkness of the lounge. I rolled the glass between my palms, watching as the amber liquid ran around the edge. Totally lost in my own thoughts until the security light in the rear garden turned on. The sudden light in the darkness shocked me and I was on my feet, fear gripped me as I slowly made my way to the french windows, collecting a poke from the hearth. It gave me some comfort to know that I could protect myself if needed, although I had no idea against what, or who.

There was someone there, I was sure of it, I could feel their presence. My hand reached out to the handle and I fought to keep it from shaking as I unlocked the door, opening it wide before I stepped outside.

"Who's there?" My voice sounded stronger than it felt. All that greeted me in return was the sound of silence. I grasped the poker in both hands like it was a baseball bat. My heart was beating hard in my chest as I stepped outside. The security light lit up the area, and my eyes scanned it, looking for any sign of an intruder. Suddenly from the hedge I heard a noise and I turned towards it as I waited to see who would step out of the undergrowth. I was shocked when Mr Buggles the neighbor's tortoise shell cat strode into view. I let out a huge sigh of relief as I realized that he must've set off the security lights. He glared at me as if I was crazy as I chuckled and shook my head.

I felt so stupid that a cat could make me feel so paranoid, so I made my way back to the safety of the house, I was about to step inside when I heard a voice that chilled my blood right there in its veins.

"Hello Edward, I bet you thought you would never see me again."

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><p><strong>Authors Note:<strong> Dum, Dum DDUUMMMM… So who is it that is waiting for Edward in the darkness? Thanks for reading, and massive thanks to Leigh Warner for pre reading. Happy Christmas (that's what us Brit's say) to all my readers, thank you so much for your support this year. I hope you enjoyed this update, the next chapters written and I will update soon – PROMISE!


	33. Night Visitor

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or any of these characters. No copyright infringement is intended**

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><p>I spun around to face once again the person whose voice caused my heart to nearly stop beating. The poker clattered to the ground. "Laurent! What are you doing here?"<p>

He laughed at me. "Edward, Edward. You always get right to the heart of the matter don't you. Nice to see that hasn't changed." He took a tentative step toward me, his hands were raised in front of him showing me that he wasn't going to harm me.

"Are you going to answer me? How did you find me?" I asked.

A serious expression took over his normally calm demeanor. "I didn't think you would be awake, but I saw you through the window. I came to warn you." His voice was barely a whisper. "He knows you are alive. I thought I had covered our tracks better."

My world caved in around me. Deep down, I wasn't totally surprised by this, I mean the flowers had been a giveaway, but to hear it and having it confirmed by someone who was close to the head of the beast, took anyway any semblance of hope that might have remained.

"Come inside, we can't talk here." I led him into the kitchen where I turned on one of the under cabinet lights to give us some illumination.. I turned to him, the words caught in my throat. "How?"

Laurent stared at me. "I don't know exactly, but he was alerted to the fact you had potentially been seen some weeks ago. Of course he didn't believe it at first. I heard some of the men talking about watching your apartment and then here. It took them some time to work out for sure, you were in fact alive. I thought he had given up, dismissing it as a fanciful rumor. I was wrong, and by the time I heard, it was too late. I am only sorry."

"What's going to happen to me? Is he coming for me, for Bella?" I wasn't scared for me, I could take what was undoubtedly to come but I worried about her and my family. They were blameless, yet had been threatened before.

"I would be lying to you if I said I knew the answers. No one can second guess what he will do next." He let out a deep sigh. "All I do know is that right now he is enjoying toying with you."

My feet carried me to the kitchen sink where I retched. My hands braced against the counter, keeping me upright, somehow. This could not be happening to me, to Bella. Wiping my mouth on the back of my hand, through tears that stung my eyes I turned back to him. "Please tell me this is some kind of sick joke, Laurent. He can't know, he won't let me go this time, will he?"

Laurent came to stand in front of me, reaching out and placing his hands on my shoulder as if this would calm me in some way. "No one knows what he will do. He was angry, so very angry. I have only seen him lose it like that once before." His voice faded away.

My mind raced, I couldn't comprehend what he was saying or how this would affect things for me and Bella. She was the most important thing in my world, there was no way of my protecting her from that madman.

"What will it take for him to leave Bella and my family alone?" The words came out barely in a whisper, and I was terrified of the answer.

"I don't know, he doesn't seem to want you back in his control, yet. Trust me if he did, you would be there now."

Sighing I answered. "I know. Look I have questions about Heidi, what happened to her and…"

Laurent looked uncomfortable and moved away from me.

"Please? I need to know what happened to her and the baby. I remember that he said it had been taken care of, but I need to know what happened to both of them."

Laurent looked at his watch. "I cannot stay any longer, they will notice soon that I have gone."

My hand reached out and grabbed hold of his arm, "Please? I have to know."

He pulled away from me as if my touch burned him, he hissed "You need to know? Do you think you can live with that knowledge every day? Knowing you are responsible for this whole mess? Knowing their blood is on your hands? The baby wasn't taken care of. Heidi? Well I didn't see her after the night you were captured."

I stepped away from him, knowing that he had just confirmed my worst fears, they were both dead and it was my fault.

The hall light came on and I could hear the sound of my mom's voice calling out. "Hello? Edward is that you?"

Turning to the door that led out into the hall, I was torn between answering her call and asking Laurent what he meant, to confirm what I was thinking. I turned back to him, but all that greeted me was an empty kitchen.

I sank to the floor and pulled my knees to my chest, wrapping my arms around them as I became lost in my thoughts. I never heard Esme's footsteps getting closer to me, and it wasn't until she was crouching in front of me that I registered she had come into the room.

Her hand gently touched my cheek, I didn't react. "Ssh, it's okay my darling I'm here." She whispered as I began to cry, Before I knew it she had her arms wrapped around me and was sitting on the floor with me.

All I could do between sobs was mutter. "It's all my fault."

How long we stayed there I had no idea, but I was shocked when I heard Carlisle's voice and I recoiled as the kitchen light was switched on, flooding the room with a harsh, white light. When he saw my reaction, he quickly turned it off again.

"What's going on?" There was concern in his voice.

"I don't know. I thought that I heard voices down here, so I came down and found him here."

His face appeared before me. "Son, come on now, let's get you upstairs and into bed."

He gently guided me to my feet and wrapped his arm around my waist to support me. We made our way back to my bedroom. Once there, Esme pulled the covers back and I laid down but I knew that sleep would not find me. I closed my eyes, only to avoid the questions I knew would be asked of me.

I feigned sleep as I waited for Carlisle and Esme to leave. Thoughts raced through my mind. Laurent had sought me out, was it only to tell me that Aro knew I was alive or was there some other reason? I honestly felt that he cared what happened to me. I mean he gave me no reason in my whole time in Volterra to believe that he held any ill feeling toward me. He was the closest thing I had to a friend.

Once I heard the door to my bedroom close I sat upright in bed, I couldn't stand the images that were playing out in the darkness. I reached out toward the lamp on the bedside table, as my hand stretched out I thought I saw Heidi's face in the darkness and my hand recoiled. My mind was clearly playing tricks on me so I pushed on and flicked the switch. Once the room as bathed in the comforting light I heaved a sigh of relief.

Now that I was no longer in the darkness, I laid back on the bed and stared at the ceiling. Aro knew, but yet I wasn't in any immediate danger. Why? If what Laurent said was true, and he wanted me, then he would quite simply come and take me. I feared that he was planning something far worse, that would involve my family or Bella. I couldn't stand the thought of that. Quite simply I would die before I allowed any harm to come to any of them for my mistakes.

I sent Emmett a text message, asking him to call me when he woke up. I wanted to check when Bella was heading to Forks, the further away she was away from this, and me, the better.

Thankfully dawn began to break. There was no way to describe it, other than I was exhausted. Maybe now the night was over I hoped I would be able to relax and catch up on some of the sleep I had missed. Just as I rolled over and pulled the covers over my head I heard my phone vibrate on the nightstand. Reaching out to grab it I thought it would be Emmett asking me what I wanted.

"Finally woke up from your beauty sleep have you?" I teased.

There was silence at the other end of the line which surprised me, so I pulled the handset away to look at the number and was faced with an unknown number on the display. My heart began to pound in my chest as I waited to hear who was on the other end.

"Who is it? What do you want?" I demanded.

The voice that finally broke the silence shocked me, it was Bella.

"Edward, sorry it was so strange to hear your voice again. I didn't make to freak you out, I never thought about the possibility." The words came out all in a rush before she let out a soft sigh.

"Bella, it's okay. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to snap, it's just been a long night." I snickered at the irony of my own comment. "So, dare I ask why you are calling me?"

"I'm leaving town for a few days. Going to visit Charlie and get my head together. I wanted to let you know." She sounded hesitant.

"Talk to me, what's wrong." I pushed. Knowing her like I did, there was more than just a common courtesy to the reason for the phone call.

Silence greeted me once again, I could hear her breathing into the phone.

"I'm scared Edward, what was with the flowers? Then Emmett leaves one of his guys with me and Rose? It's like having a bodyguard, tell me the truth, you owe me that much."

Of course she was right, there seemed little point lying to her. Taking a deep breath, I spoke.

"Bella, all this is linked to my kidnapping. It turns out that my survival, and escape has been discovered." My voice dropped. "He knows I am alive. The flowers, they were messages from him, maybe a warning. I don't really know what will happen next."

"Great. So not only do I have to deal with the fact you cheated, and the fallout from that. I now have to look over my shoulder, worrying that some deranged Physcopath might pop up at anytime and hurt me?"

The anger was clear in her voice, there was nothing that I could think to say to her.

"I know that it doesn't help you, and it's the last thing you want to hear from me, but-"

"Don't you dare say you are sorry Edward. It's a word that I am tired of hearing, it means so little now." Bella spat at me.

"Bella, please? Let me explain, I know that this is hard for you, trust me this is equally as hard for me. I am now living in fear for not only, my life, but yours and my families lives too right now. He knows I am alive, it puts us all risk. Me? I don't care what happens to me as long as you are all safe." I paused as the enormity of what I was going to say hit me. "I would die before I let anything happen to you, or them. I'm so sorry I brought this to your door."

Once again there was a period of silence. "I think it's for the best if I do get out of town for a while. Charlie will keep me safe. I'm sorry Edward if I went off at you, it's just…"

She couldn't finish. I felt better at hearing those words from her, I thought that there might some hope, just a tiny sliver of light at the end of the very long tunnel that I was currently in, but I wasn't to be that lucky as she quickly extinguished it.

"This doesn't mean things have changed between us. I still have to work out what I want, but I don't want any harm to come to you or your family. You've all been through enough."

Those words hurt me, but somehow I managed to speak. "I know. Just be safe, please?"

"I will. Just give me some time. I'm not saying I can get over this, but I am also not saying we don't have a future. I'll call you when I get back. Look after yourself Edward."

With those words, the call ended. I was left holding the phone in my hand. Thinking of everything I should have told her, how Laurent had come to me, and no decisions had been made regarding my future which in turn meant hers. Thinking about it, I wasn't sure hearing the deranged madman who put me through hell was enjoying toying with me, with us, before he made his final decision.

I knew that once his decision was made, his vengeance would be swift and precise. All I could hope was he left Bella and my family out of this, and focused on me. Bella's words to me about us not being over was a faint glimmer of hope in the distance. But it wasn't anything tangible, it was there. All that was left now was hope.

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><p><strong>Authors Note:<strong>

PHEW! I will say that only two of you guessed correctly that the visitor in the darkness was Laurent. Many of you thought that it was Aro, or Heidi.

Happy New Year from the UK, and I will be keeping the chapters coming on this, as I really want to get this finished. Massive thanks go out to Leigh Warner for being my faithful pre-reader on this fic. There is no beta at the moment, so any mistakes are mine.


	34. Absence Makes

Two weeks passed so slowly, Bella was still in Forks, and there had been no more deliveries or strange occurrences. I had begun to think I had imagined the whole thing. But deep in the corners of my mind, I knew that I hadn't imagined talking to Laurent in the kitchen late night. I couldn't bring myself to tell Carlisle or Esme about what had happened. It might be strange but telling them would make it real. It had been hard enough telling Bella. Just hearing the fear in her voice brought back to me everything I went through, the desperation,fear and despair I felt daily during my time as a prisoner. I knew no good would come of his revelation, but I also wanted to know more. How did he uncover this so quickly? Had someone been watching us, waiting for the chance to go running back with the news that would seal my fate?

I had no idea what I wanted to do. I could leave, run away from the problem, but I would never stop looking over my shoulder. I would always be afraid of that knock on the door late at night, or the car that slowed just to ask for directions. Living in constant fear would be like living half a life. Plus there was my family to consider. I was all too aware of the fact Aro knew them, where they lived and worked. Nothing would stop him until he got what he wanted, me.

Of course people noticed a difference in me, Esme was almost walking on eggshells like she was afraid I would snap at any given moment. I was convinced that Carlisle was going to say something, although he never did. There was one person that I could talk to about this, one person who wouldn't judge me, Doctor Newton. He was always there for me to talk to, and listened to me without passing judgement. I honestly can say he was one of the people who saved me in the darkest hours, and trust me there were many. He made me see that I had to tell Bella what I knew about Heidi and the baby. It was the last secret that remained between us in regard to my abduction, and the only way to be free of the burden was to tell her.

I also came to realize how much truth there was in the old saying; _"If you love something, set it free. If it comes back, it is yours. If it doesn't, it never was."_ Bella was the something I had set free, and in the worst possible way. All I could do was hope that she was safe in Forks and maybe, one day she would come back to me. Of course, she had been in touch with Rose, so I knew that she was still there. I longed to talk to her, to hear her voice, but I also knew I had to wait for her to make contact. Every day she was the first thing I thought of on a morning, and on a night when I fell asleep she was the last thing I saw as I stared at the photograph which sat in a frame on my nightstand.

I kept up with the jogging, taking advantage of the quiet neighborhood my parents lived it, but at the same time I was always aware of my surroundings, looking for anyone or anything that was out of place. Watching for signs of Aro or his minions, there was nothing, As a precaution, I had taken to switching the times of my runs, sometimes I would go out early morning, or late at night, never the same time or route in succession. I might not feel like I was under any immediate threat, but I wasn't prepared to take any chances.

After my morning run I went for a lay down on my bed before my session with Doctor Newton just after lunch. My eyes had closed and I was drifting to sleep when my cell phone rang, startling me. It rarely rang these days, usually only Emmett would call me when he was checking up on me. I looked at the name on the display and my heart soared. It was Bella.

"Hey." I answered, unsure of what this call would be about.

"Hi Edward, I'm not disturbing you am I?" She sounded unsure.

"No! Not at all. Is everything okay?" I was immediately worried. I hadn't spoken to her since the morning she left for Forks.

"Yeah, you know what it's like being there. Honestly, there is only so much forest that you can see before you go stir crazy. It's almost like being in pris-"

Her words fell away, I smiled at her obvious slip, knowing that she was speaking without thinking. I couldn't hold that against her.

"Yeah, I know what that's like, it really is no fun." I joked.

"_I'm sorry, I didn't think. How fucking stupid am I?"_

"Bella, please don't. You didn't mean anything by it. I can't expect to watch what they say around me forever incase it upsets me. Hell no one would ever speak again for fear of upsetting me. It's nice to be normal."

I could hear her moving around so I knew that she hadn't hung up on me. There was a loud sigh.

"_Can you forgive me for being such a bitch to you? I know that you have been through absolute hell, and then I react like that. I mean, yeah, I am still struggling to get my head around the whole fact you might have a child somewhere and you cheating on me, but deep down I haven't stopped loving you."_

I was silent, the words that she spoke meant so much to me, just hearing the fact that she still loved me, and never stopped lifted my heart. I listened as she continued.

"I wish that I'd opened the door when you came round, but I was scared. That sounds crazy, but I stood there on the other side and it broke my heart to hear you sounding so desperate. I just couldn't open the door, I should have done. I wish I could go back and change that."

"Bella, I don't blame you. Let's face it, I was crazy to just turn up like that, hammering on the door." I let out a small laugh. "I wouldn't have opened the door to me either."

She joined me. "You really did scare me, I thought at first…."

"They wouldn't come there, it's too public." I barely whispered. My thoughts went to the conversation that I had with Laurent that night he turned up unannounced. I closed my eyes, knowing that I couldn't lie to her anymore. Keeping the truth from her was what led me into his mess, now it was the only thing that would give me any chance of a future. "When are you coming back home? I need to see you, there is something I need to talk to you about."

The words were out there, free. Now all I could do was wait to see what her reaction would be.

"I'm already home. I got bored of being there, so I hopped on a flight and am back at the apartment now. I'm unpacking now."

I was stunned. "I… I thought that you were going to let Emmett know when you were leaving? Does he know that your back?"

"Not yet, I was going to call him after I spoke to you. I take it that nothing strange has happened? He would have told me, right?"

"Nothing new. It's been quiet, almost too quiet." Those last words were the truth, but maybe I was expecting too much from Aro, some large sweeping statement to show me that he was in charge. There was also the possibility he decided I had suffered enough at his hands, it seems like that was a long shot, but it was better than nothing.

"Are you listening to me?" Bella's words pulled me out of my thoughts.

"No, sorry I was a million miles away. What were you saying?"

Her gentle laugh echoed through the phone, and I felt myself smile, genuinely for the first time in longer than I cared to remember.

"I have to unpack and get myself ready to start work in a few days." There was a pause. "You said you want to see me?"

"Yes." I held my breath as I waited for her to answer.

"Okay. Shall I come to you, or do you want to come here?"

I thought for a moment. "Can you come here? Carlisle and Esme are going out for dinner, so we will be able to talk without anyone else hearing. I can make us something to eat if you want? "

"That's fine with me. I'll come over around six?"

I smiled into the phone. "Great, see you then."

With that the call ended, but I knew in the space of a few short hours I would be with her once again.

Authors Note.

Thanks as always for reading and please let me know your thoughts. Please do sign in as I would love to be able to reply to you.

Pre-read by Leigh Warner – who holds me hand and kicks my arse when it's needed.


	35. Back And Forth

**Authors Note: I don't own Twilight, no copyright infringement is intended.**

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><p>As the clock edged ever closer to six o'clock the more my nerves began to fray. Wondering if Bella would show as agreed? Would I have the courage to tell her what I knew of Heidi and my unborn child's fate? How would she react? I had no time to pursue these thoughts any further as the doorbell rang, causing me to jump.<p>

I took a few deep breaths as I reminded myself that it was only Bella on the other side of the door, there was nothing to be scared of. The doorbell rang again and again, almost as if someone was pressing it again and again. Rushing to answer I was shocked when I opened the door to find Carlisle on the other side of it, with Esme in his arms.

"Shit! What happened?" I gasped as I took in the sight before me. Carlisle brushed past me into the lounge where he laid her down on the couch as if she was made of the most fragile china.

"Dad! Please, what happened?" I begged.

Only then did he turn to me. "She was mugged as she waited for me outside work tonight. It's my fault, I was late out."

I was on my knees at her side. She smiled at me despite her obvious pain. "Mom? Are you okay?" I fought back the tears as I looked at her. There was a cut on her cheek and the beginning of a black eye. She winced as she shifted to face me.

"I'm okay sweetheart. I should've just let them take my purse, but I just didn't want to give in like that." Her voice dropped to a hushed whisper. "You know how your father likes to fuss."

"Well if you had let me take you to the hospital to be checked over like I wanted…." He raised his eyebrows at her, almost daring her to argue.

"There was no point wasting their time darling, Jasper is going to come and check me over, and I told you there is no real damage apart from to my pride."

"Esme, you don't understand do you? Coming out of the building and seeing you lying there on the ground. I thought my life was over." Carlisle had tears in his eyes. The love he felt for her was palpable.

She opened her mouth to answer him, but was interrupted by the sound of the door being opened then closed, and Jasper's voice carried towards us.

"Hey, it's only me. Sorry, I got here as quickly as I could." He walked into the lounge and went straight to Esme's side. "Wow, you seem to have been quite lucky I would say from what I can see."

I stood to one side, watching with interest as she examined my mom, taking care not to cause her any more discomfort than was needed. My eyes never left the scene before me as I tried to work out what the chances were of my mom being mugged only days after it was confirmed that Aro knew of my survival. I never believed in coincidences, not before I was taken and certainly not now. This to me, bore all the hallmarks of Aro's hand. Of course, there was no way to prove any of this.

The doorbell ringing brought me out of my internal musing, Bella was here. I had forgotten that she was coming, now there would be more than just us here, I certainly hadn't planned on their being an audience.

Without bothering to explain, I went to answer the door. Opening it my breath caught as I saw her standing there. She was dressed simply in a pair of skinny jeans and an oversized sweater.

"Hi, sorry I'm a bit late, or am I early?" She motioned to the cars in the drive. "I thought you said we would be alone?"

"Sorry, I should've called you. There are one or two people here that I wasn't expecting. Esme was mugged this afternoon as she waited for Carlisle outside work. Jasper is here checking her over."

There was a look of horror on Bella's face before she brushed past me and made her way toward the lounge. I paused for a moment, then I followed her. I hadn't told them that Bella and I had talked, or that she was coming over. I'd hoped that we could at least talk with no-one else around. Now there would be the awkward questions and I worried about the expectations of my family and what additional pressure that could place on my already tenuous connection with Bella.

I hesitated in the doorway, listening to the conversation that was going on in my absence.

"Bella! What are you doing here sweetheart?" Esme gasped.

"Never mind that, what have you been doing?" Bella avoided the question by deflecting and asking a question herself.

"Oh, it's nothing, I was just me being silly and not paying attention."

"I think it was something Esme, you wouldn't have Jasper here, and then Carlisle and Edward both looking so upset if it was nothing, would you?"

The comment made me smile, I knew that there was no way that Esme would be able to argue with her. Bella was always for the first time in longer than I cared to remember sure to win an argument with her, something Carlisle still couldn't manage even after all their years of marriage. Deep down, I suspect he never really tried, preferring to let her think she won.

I walked into the room and three sets of eyes fell upon me. I smiled, and it was a genuine one. I couldn't remember the last time that had happened.

"Darling! Why didn't you say that Bella was coming over?" Esme teased, a wide smile on her face. Bella blushed furiously.

"Oh, it was nothing really. Just a chance to catch up on things now I'm back home." She tried to divert attention away.

Carlisle looked at me, a questioning look on his face. Jasper's eye narrowed, I couldn't look him in the face, he would be able to read me and know that I was hiding something.

"Anyone like a coffee?" It was a poor excuse, but all I had to get away from their questioning looks and the scrutiny that I felt I was being subjected to.

"Make some tea please." Esme called out as I quickly escaped toward the kitchen.

Once in the safety of the kitchen I put the kettle on the stove to boil before I assembled the tea pot I knew Esme would insist I used, along with her best china cups and saucers. All the time I was doing this my hands shook, and I did my best not to drop any of her beloved tea service. When I had them assembled on the counter, then, and only then I braced my hands against the edge and allowed my head to drop down as I took, some deep breaths to try and calm myself from the blinding panic that I could feel beginning to rise from deep inside me.

The kettle boiled furiously on the stove this was my cue. I would need to pull myself together before facing my family again.

Taking the boiling kettle from the stove it was hard to keep my hands from shaking. I attempted this several times before I let out a frustrated shout as there was no way to keep the shaking under control. Taking several deep breaths I prepared to try again. My hand still shook as I reached out towards the kettle again, only this time another hand was placed gently over mind, stopping me. Then just as quickly it was gone. My eyes turned to the person who the hand belonged to, although that was academic. The way that I reacted to their touch, which was as gentle and tender as it was fleeting. A pair of deep brown eyes met mine, and I could see there was no malice, no accusation or anger in there. All I could see was concern reflecting back.

"Let me help you." Was all she said as her hand gently moved mine away. "Last thing you need it to scold yourself." I let out a chuckle.

"Yeah, the only good thing is Jasper is here, so no trip to the ER needed."

The look of horror on her face quickly morphed into the combination of pursed lips and narrowed eyes as Bella attempted to be angry at me, when she knew that it was hopeless. Taking a gamble, I smiled at her, much to my surprise, I worked and she returned the smile while shaking her head. Bella then nudged me out of the way so that she made the drinks. Once the tea pot and cups were safely on the tray, I tried to lift it, but again my shaking hands gave me away. Bella smiled. "Let me carry it."

"I'm not fucking incapable!" I snapped at her before I could stop the words from falling from my lips. "Sorry, I didn't mean that to come out like that."

A weak smile glanced across her face. "Hey, don't get pissy with me Cullen, it's your ass I was trying to save. I cannot imagine what Esme would do if you dropped her tea service, but if you want to find out…" She paused, causing me to laugh at the fact that of course, she was right. Esme would pitch fit if I dropped her china and we both knew it.

Then the kitchen door swung open and in stepped Jasper, he glanced between us trying to work out what was happening as we were both smiling. Something I don't think he had seen us do, together for some time now. "You guys okay in here?" He asked, although the answer was quite clear.

Bella answered before I could get a chance. "It's all good thanks. Now be a doll will you and carry this through." She thrust the tray into his hands and then made a shooing motion with her hands, indicating that he should move. With a slightly startled look he did as he was instructed and carried the tray back into the lounge.

Esme was by now getting restless, and clearly fed up of playing the good little patient, much to Carlisle's annoyance. I could see his jaw clenching as he tried to persuade her to just lay back down on the couch. It was only when Jasper agreed with him, she eventually gave in.

We were all seated, drinking tea in silence, glances were being exchanged as Bella was sitting next to me on the window seat. I won't lie, it felt good to have her here, so close to me, even if she was in reality a million miles away. Esme put her tea cup down on the coffee table before she placed her hand on Carlisle's forearm.

"Be an absolute angel would you, and draw me a bath. I feel the need to have a long, hot soak." She asked.

"Are you sure that it's a good idea? I mean, you shouldn't be alone up there." He turned to Jasper. "What do you think? Would it help with the aches and bruising?"

Jasper opened his mouth to speak and for once, he seemed lost for words. I almost choked on a mouthful of tea as I saw the look that Esme shot Jasper, it was a silent. _'Don't you dare say no.' _All eyes fell on me, and I waved my hand to indicate that I was okay.

"I think that would be an excellent idea Esme, nothing wrong with a bath to aid the recovery process in my opinion." Jasper sounded to convincing that Carlisle was on his feet in a split second, dashing to go upstairs and start the bath running.

Esme turned her attention back to Jasper. "Don't you need to be getting back to Alice? The last thing I want is for her to panic, if you're not home when you should be." She glanced at the clock on the fireplace. "If you leave now, you will be home before her. I take it that you didn't tell her what happened?"

He shook his head. "No, I didn't want to panic her. Carlisle said you were okay, but refused to go to the ER, so I came to you."

She nodded at him. "Thank you for that Jasper, you are truly an angel. Now, if you will just see that I make it upstairs without incident, that would be wonderful."

As she rose to her feet Bella got to hers. "Esme, I can help you? If you would prefer?"

Esme turned to her, shooing her away with her hand as she walked to the door, Jasper at her side. "No, no. I won't hear of it. You and Edward had plans for tonight. I will be fine, trust me." With that she shot me a knowing look, and smiled at Bella before leaving the room.

My cup made contact with the saucer with a little too much force, the sound ricocheting around the now empty room. I turned to Bella, uttering three words that said it all. "Subtle, isn't she."

There was another moment of uneasy silence before Bella laughed. She clapped her hand to her mouth to stifle the sound. Once she was able to, she spoke."I was thinking the same thing. Poor Jasper, he really was backed into a corner there, wasn't he?"

All I could do was nod and agree. "Yup, what Esme Cullen wants, she gets. None of the men in this family can ever say no to her. That's where Alice gets it from."

We sat in silence, hearing the voices of my parents as they carried down the stairs, the front door opening and closing and then Jasper's car leaving.

Bella broke the silence. "So, seeing as Esme has managed to get us our night alone as planned, despite all the drama, are we going to grab some food and catch up like we planned? You did say that you wanted to talk to me, didn't you?"

My hand scrubbed my face, of course she was right. I had asked her over here, but I hadn't planned on all this happening. I'd hoped that we would have time to talk, then I could tell her what I knew from speaking to Laurent. Now my plans, were messed up.

"Yes, I did." I got to my feet and walked into the kitchen, rifling through the drawer where I knew that the take out menu's were stored. Pulling them out, I handed them over to Bella, letting her choose where we ordered from. It made no difference to me, as long as they delivered.

After examining the options, she handed me the pizza menu. "I know it's not as good as the one at the lake, but I will have to do for now." I nodded. "Just order me the usual."

Once the pizza was ordered, we set about clearing away the cups and saucers, hand washing the delicate china. There was no way on earth that I would risk putting in the dishwasher. Well, when I say we, I mean that Bella did it and I watched. It pained me to step aside, let someone take over what I should be able to do on a daily basis. This whole situation was setting my mind spinning in a million different directions all at the same time. Bella being here, so close to me was unnerving. It was almost as if nothing had happened, like the clock had been turned back a year before all this mess started and we were just another young couple, so very much in love.

Just as I was about to reach out and pull her into my arms, the doorbell rang and with an excited squeal she rushed from the kitchen before I could stop her. Panic filled me as I followed her and watched helpless as she placed her hand on the door knob to open the door.

There was a large shape on the other side, I could make them out through the glass."Bella, no, don't!" Were the words that left me, she turned to me, frowning, the door opening wide to reveal a man standing on the other side. My heart stopped beating and it felt like the world was in slow motion as she turned to face him. Then everything went back to normal as Bella turned back to me.

"See? It's only the pizza delivery man!" Bella shook her head as I stepped forward, pulling a $50 note from my pocket and handing it to him.

"Keep the change." Was all I could say as I took the large, flat boxes from him and slammed the door in his face.

We walked to the dining room where I deposited the pizza boxes onto the table, pulling them open to reveal the treasure inside. Bella sat next to me, pulling a slice free before she paused.

"What was all that about Edward? With the delivery guy?" She asked.

"Nothing, it was nothing." I lied.

"Don't play games, you looked terrified. But okay, I'll wait for answers. First we eat, then you talk." The tone of her voice told me that there would be no getting around it so I nodded in agreement.

Once we had eaten, it would be time for me to tell her what I knew. The pizza stuck in my throat, just like I knew my words would when the time came. This time, there would be no lies, no half truths. I would tell her everything.

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><p><strong>Authors note:<strong>  
>BIG THANKS to everyone who reads and a special thank you to those who review, I love hearing what you think and where you suspect things are headed. I know I am a tease with it, but I promise that the next update will be super quick. I was gonna tag it onto this, but it didn't read right and it would have made the chapter HUGE. Hope you don't mind!<p> 


	36. No secrets, no lies

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or any of these characters. No copyright infringement is intended.**

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><p>I did everything I could to delay the inevitable, I wondered what would happen once she knew everything, everything that I knew, everything that I had experienced would be laid bare before her. This is how it should have been from day one, secrets and lies had led us to this, to me living my life with the fear that one day Aro would come for me again, or worse, he would come after my family or Bella.<p>

Eventually we had eaten our fill of pizza, and the air between us was heavy with the expectation of what I was to reveal. I led Bella into the lounge, where she sat on one couch, and I sat on the edge of the coffee table, thereby placing myself directly in front of her. I took a deep breath before I spoke, once I started the words tumbled freely. Nothing was left out, no secrets, only the truth.

Only when I had nothing left to say, did I look into her eyes. I expected to see anger in them, but instead I saw concern. Her hand reached out and covered mine. "Oh Edward, you say all this has happened here? Laurent came here, sought you out?" I nodded. "Have you told anyone?"

"No. I needed to know more about what Aro has planned, the flowers were a warning shot. I have no idea what else he planned to do, or where he would strike next. That was why I needed to know you were safe, why you had to leave town. I couldn't risk he thought of him coming after you. Me? I have been through the very worst he could dish out, and yet I survived. Barely, but I made it." I paused, struggling to find the words. "If anything was to happen to you, I would blame myself."

Bella asked the question I knew she wanted the answer to more than anything. "Heidi, is she… is the baby?"

"There is no baby, he took care of it. Heidi? Laurent told me that he hadn't seen her since the day I arrived there. I think she may be dead, but no one knows for sure. He couldn't tell me any more than that."

She let out a deep sigh. "As much as I hate her for fucking you, and hated you for betraying me like that, I wouldn't wish anything bad to happen to her."

Bella stood up quickly causing me to jump slightly. "I bet we can find out if anything happened to Heidi, I mean there would be a body right? I could ask my dad to ask around, I'd say that she was a friend of mine that I was worried about."

I shook my head. "It wouldn't work, they are too clever. Plus, I don't want to involve the Police in this."

Bella nodded slowly, her hands were pressed together as if she was praying, her hands bounced off her lips. "I have it! I could tell him that she was worried about an abusive boyfriend, that's why I can't go to the Police here. Charlie will understand, it will be okay. I can even ask him what he knows of Aro he-"

"No!" The work came out much harsher than I had intended. "I'm sorry Bella, I just worry that if he starts digging around he might uncover too much, it might put him in danger, or even you."

Bella nodded. "Okay, I get it. I will ask him to look into Heidi."

"Why are you so keen to help me with this?"

"Because this has put us all through hell, especially you, and no-one deserves that."

All I could do was manage a weak smile. "I got what I deserved. Losing you would have been more than enough to drive that point home, without everything else."

Silence hung between us, neither of us seemed to know what to say next. I meant what I said.

She smiled at me, reaching out to palm my cheek. I leaned into her touch. The words fell from my lips before I could stop them.

"This was all my fault, and I know you hate me, I don't blame you for that. I just wish that I could go back to that night, things would be different. I want you to know though, every moment I was gone, I thought of you, I fought to come back to you, never knowing if you would still be here when I finally made it home. Now I can see that I have to let you go. As much as it breaks my heart to do it, you deserve better than me."

"You haven't lost me." The words came out in barely a whisper, but my heart skipped a beat hearing them. "But I still need time."

I nodded slowly. "I know you do, and I will respect what you say."

"Edward, I want you to know the truth about what happened while you were…. Gone. Nothing happened with Aro, I swear to you. I met him in a bar where I thought you were going to be, then when you didn't turn up, he was there. I should've seen through it, but I was blinded by my anger and upset." She paused briefly. "I want to be honest with you. Riley, now he was a different matter."

I couldn't breathe, hearing that nothing had happened with Aro was a relief, but the thought of Riley, someone who wanted to kill me, laying a single finger on her made my stomach turn.

"Riley was charming, and supportive. Yes, I know that your family was there for me, so was Jake, I cannot thank them enough for everything they did for me. But when I was with Riley he never looked at me like I was made of china, about to shatter at any moment. His sister is an author I work closely with, she introduced us and we got on."

Her voice dropped. "He made me forget, even if it was for the briefest of moments. I felt 'normal' when I was with him. Is that so wrong?"

I shook my head, as I choked out the word. "No." My eyes never left her face. "Did you sleep with him?" I was afraid of the answer to the question I had just asked. I watched as tears filled her eyes.

Slowly, her head began to shake. "I promise you when I said I hadn't, it was the truth. He wanted more, more than I could give him. There were moments when it would have been so easy to just fall into bed with him, to forget the ache that never went away because you were not there. But I couldn't, I never stopped loving you."

Her words only stopped when she wasn't able to fight back tears any longer and her face crumbled. I wrapped my arms around her, holding her as she continued to sob into my chest. Now she needed me to be strong for her, I couldn't let her down.

Eventually Bella's sobs died down, I continued to hold her to me, enjoying the feel of her against me. She pulled back from me, wiping at her eyes with her thumbs. Even with her makeup smudged and mascara streaked, she still looked amazing to me. I heard her mumble under her breath. "I'm sorry."

"It's okay, you don't need to apologize for anything." I smiled at her, attempting to show her I was here for her.

We stared at each other in silence, what I didn't realize was that we were moving closer together, it was as if our bodies were still naturally drawn to each other. We jumped apart when we heard the main door open and close with a loud slam. I began to panic, who was here? My parents were upstairs so I knew it wasn't them. Bella put her hand on my forearm, obviously sensing my concern.

The lounge door burst open, and Emmett breezed in, making a beeline for the pizza boxes.

"Hey, I heard Mom had an accident. What happened?" He asked, then he looked at Bella and me. "Oh, sorry, was I interrupting something?" He gestured between the two of us.

I couldn't answer, so Bella did for both of us. "No, you weren't interrupting. We were just catching up. Esme's upstairs with Carlisle."

"What happened? " Emmett demanded as he grabbed a piece of the abandoned pizza.

I didn't know what to say, the words just wouldn't come out. The lounge door opened and Carlisle stepped inside.

"I thought heard your voice son." He smiled at Emmett, who walked over to him and threw his arm around him.

"What the fuck happened? I heard from Jasper, that Mom was hurt. Why didn't you call me?"

Carlisle raised his hands, "She's okay, understandably, a little shaken up. Why don't you come upstairs and see her, she would love to see you I'm sure."

Emmett nodded and then followed him from the room. Just as he closed the door, Emmett's head popped back around the door. "Be good kiddies."

I turned to Bella once we were alone. "Sorry about him, you know what he's like."

She just smiled at me. "I should go, I mean, if Emmett is here I don't want to be any bother."

I rested my hands on her shoulders. "You're always welcome here, there is no need to go if you don't want to." What I wanted to say was, _'Please stay. I don't want you to leave.'_

Bella smiled at me. "It's okay, I will try and catch Charlie tonight and ask him to start looking into things."

She pulled away from me and began walking toward the door. I followed her, not really wanting to say goodbye to her, but knowing that it would happen. I walked her to her car, making sure that she was secure inside. As she began to pull away I called out to her. "Let me know you get back safe, please?"

She simply smiled, stopping the car and lowering the window. "Of course I will."

I stood and watched as she drove away. Tonight had been a turning point for us, we talked more than we had since I came home. The lies that I had wrapped myself up in were stripped away, there were no more secrets anymore. It felt good, we were finally moving forward, even if it was baby steps for now, each one was in the right direction.

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><p><strong>Authors Note:<strong>  
>Thanks for reading. This chapter is dedicated to a few very special ladies, all of who have had birthdays this last week or so, or have birthdays coming up. Leigh who pre-reads this for me, Foufy, Dicatakadd, Tash and finally Kirsty and who I know LOVES this story.<p> 


	37. Getting By

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or any of these characters. No copyright infringement is intended.**

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><p>The days passed in a blur, Esme was back to her normal routine, determined as she put it, not to let such a small incident affect her. Carlisle was treating her like she might break at any moment, much to her annoyance. Things were back to normal, well apart from the fact I was itching to speak to Bella. She had called me when she got back to our apartment, and we talked for a while longer. I didn't want to end the call, enjoying listening to her voice, until she yawned and said that she needed to get some sleep. I wished her pleasant dreams and said I would wait for her to call. That was four days ago and I was now going out of my mind.<p>

It took everything I had not to call her, although I came close on more than one occasion finding myself with my phone in hand before I stopped myself. Carlisle and Esme noticed something was wrong, but didn't ask me for details. I guess they thought things had gone badly when she came over, even though I told them that things were okay between us, that I wasn't giving up all hope on there being a future for us.

Sessions with Doctor Newton were continuing, it was good to have someone to talk to, someone to sound out my thoughts and feelings without them looking at me either like I was crazy or needing their pity. Today's session was one I needed, I had to talk to someone about how I felt. This was how I came to be in his office, pacing the floor while I waited for my scheduled appointment.

Kate, his receptionist kept smiling at me. She knew how anxious I was and also understood there was nothing she could do to calm me down. I glanced at my watch as my tension rose, finally taking a seat before I wore a hole in the floor, I waited, resting my head back against the wall and allowing my eyes to close. I was brought out my calm when the door to his office opened and I watched as a well dressed woman stepped out, making eye contact with me, as she closed the door behind her. Kate answered the phone, before she addressed me.

"Mr Cullen, you can go through now."

I stood, smiling at her before I stepped into the familiar surroundings of Doctor Newton's office. It never felt like a Doctor's office, the room was light and airy with a real casual feel. There was a desk, but it by no means dominated the space. I walked over to where he was stood, holding out his hand to welcome me. He indicated for me to take a seat on one of the two large, leather couches. They were situated at angles to each other, facing out across the city skyline. His approach was different, the sessions were kept relaxed and informal. It felt more like sitting and chatting with a friend. I guessed this was part of why he was successful, and why I felt so comfortable here.

As we sat down, he waited for me to speak, but I didn't know where to begin so he broke the silence.

"Have you spoken to Bella since we last met?"

"No, nothing. I have been thinking about calling her, but I don't want to crowd her. It's been ten days now. Things seemed to be getting better when we met and now, I just don't know." The words fell out In a long jumble.

"Slow down Edward, one thing at a time. You haven't called her?"

I shook my head. "No, I said I'd wait for her to call me. But she hasn't." Panic ripped through me. "Do you think she is okay?"

He nodded slowly. "Think about it logically Edward. If she wasn't okay, if anything had happened to her, you would have heard. Wouldn't you?"

A deep sigh escaped me. "Yes, you're right as always."

Bella was the focus of my thoughts, and our discussion over the next hour. As usual with our sessions I had a lot to think about, to work through in my own head before we were to meet in two week's time. By then, I hoped to have spoken to Bella, not because I wanted to know if she had found anything out from Charlie, but because I wanted to hear her voice.

When arrived home, I was alone and I hated it. The emptiness of the house felt like it was going to close in on me. It felt strange to think that, especially seeing as I'd spent so much time in a small space also having to get used to being alone. Coming home had been a shock to me, and I remembered the times that I would almost freak out when surrounded by people, yet for some reason today I wanted people to be around me. I couldn't decide what to do or where to go, all I knew was I didn't want to be alone.

Considering it was a weekday, everyone that I was close to would be working the next best thing was for me to go for a run. As I pounded the pavements the sun was warm in the early afternoon, it felt nice to be able to enjoy something as simple as this. I ran further and longer than I usually did, pushing my body to its limits. Ironically, this was the one good thing to come out of the whole mess, I was in the best physical shape of my life. No amount of gym workouts would have given me either the level of fitness or stamina that I now enjoyed.

After a long shower, I went downstairs to find my parents bustling around the kitchen, I didn't let them know that I was there, content to just stand and watch. They moved like a well oiled machine, there were moments when they would just look at each other and smile. Their love for each other was clear, and I was just about to make my presence known when my cell phone rang, making me jump and also my parents turn toward me.

The name on the screen made my heart leap and also pound harder against my chest wall, it was Bella.

"Hey." I closed my eyes at my lame greeting.

"_Hey yourself. How are things?"_

"Good, I've been wondering if I should call you or not, I didn't know." I rubbed my furrowed brow.

"_Sorry it's taken me so long to call you, I should've called you, it's just been… Well, you know."_

"I think I do. Did Charlie have any news?" Instantly I felt like I shouldn't have asked and wanted nothing more than to pull the words back.

"_That's why I am calling, it's taken longer than he thought it would. Everything was hidden, it was nearly impossible to find anything." _

_She let out a sigh, as I fought back the urge to ask her what she meant. "Look, I think it's probably best if we meet up to go through it. Can I come to you?"_

I thought for a moment. "No, Esme and Carlisle are here." I looked at my watch, it was later than I thought. "It's late, and I'm guessing this might take some time?"

"_Yeah, probably best. Can we meet at the weekend, how about Saturday? You can come here late afternoon. I will make us something to eat and we can go over what I have. Then we can talk about things, well, us and where we go from here"_

That meant I had to wait three days. Three long, tortuous days to find out what had happened and if there was any way that we could fix our broken relationship.

"Is there an us?" I murmured almost to myself.

"_Yes, I believe there is." _Her voice was almost as quiet as mine. A huge smile broke out on my face.

"Wow. So, I will see you on Saturday then."

With that the call ended. I turned to see Esme staring at me, an expectant look on her face. "Was that Bella?" I nodded, the smile on my face gave her the answer that she already knew of course. I was enveloped in her arms. "Oh, sweetheart. I hope this works out, I really do."

Pulling back from her I replied. "So I do, she is everything to me," The emotion caught in my voice.

"I know she is, now you just have to show her."

I nodded. "I don't intend to mess up this second chance."

Carlisle joined us. "Dinner is ready." He smiled at me, I was unsure if he knew what was happening, but I was sure that Esme would fill him later.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

Saturday came around quicker than I thought it would, and now I found myself standing outside the door to the home I once shared with Bella. I tried to put out of my mind the last time I was here. My hand raised to knock on the door, but there was no need, it opened and revealed Bella standing there on the other side. She looked every bit as nervous as I felt.

"Come in." She stepped aside and I brushed past her and walked inside. It felt strange being back here again, it had been our home and now I felt like a stranger, a guest inside it. Looking around I saw that nothing had changed. The only things I could see missing were the photographs of us that used to hang on the wall. I couldn't blame her. Sensing her standing near me I turned to her.

"Sorry, I couldn't have them around, it hurt too much." She explained, instantly knowing what I had been looking at. "I didn't throw them away or destroy any of them."

"I know, I don't blame you." I smiled at her. "So, what are you cooking it smells good."

"I'm making lasagna, I know how much you love it."

A broad smile broke out on my face. "Sure do."

I watched as she effortlessly moved around the kitchen, preparing a salad to go with the meal. I helped by setting the table. It felt right, it felt like I was home.

Once we had eaten, Bella cleared the plates away before she indicated we should move to the corner couch. This was it, the uneasy feeling that filled my stomach made me want to run, but I was sick hiding from the truth.

"As you know, Charlie has contacts outside the normal channels." She fiddled with her hands, avoiding looking directly at me, save for a quick glance to see my response, which was a nod. "Well, they did some digging around to see if they could find anything, and there was nothing.

"What? You mean there was no trace of her?" I asked.

"Yes and no. What I mean is, there is nothing on her, it's like she never existed."

I was confused, Heidi was real, I wasn't losing my mind. "No, she was real Bella, flesh and blood, just like you are."

Bella let out a deep sigh. "What I mean is, that there is no trace of her at all, nothing. They looked into the club, the apartment and there is nothing. It all comes back to an offshore holding company registered in Monaco. The weird thing is that the only name they could find on any documents relating to Heidi, was for a child that died as an infant in the early 1980's."

"But she wasn't dead, she was very much alive. Heidi ran the club, there has to be something on her!" I exclaimed.

"Edward, they said this type of thing is common, it's a form of identity theft called 'ghosting'. They take the identity of someone who has died, and use it. Concealing the person's real identity for any number of reasons."

I was shocked."So you mean she wasn't who she said she was? She lied?"

"To all intents and purpose, yes. But seeing as you only saw her the once, she could've said she was called Marilyn Monroe, and would've had no reason to doubt her." Her hand rested on mine. "I'm sorry Edward, I know you wanted to know what happened to her, for your own sanity, but I don't think we will ever be able to find out the truth."

I nodded slowly. "Thanks for trying. Why did you tell Charlie you were asking?"

A dark chuckle escaped her lips. "I didn't tell him the truth, don't worry about that. I told him that this woman was sniffing around Jake, and I didn't trust her at all."

"He always did have a soft spot for him, didn't he." I commented.

Bella simply nodded. "Believe me when I say I'm sorry. Think finding out the truth would bring some closure to this, for all of us. Maybe we should try to move on regardless."

I met her stare. "What are you saying?"

She smiled weakly. "Okay. I'm not saying let's pretend it never happened, as that's not possible. I'm saying, let's move on, one day at a time and see where we end up, no promises though."

Her words shocked me more than anything else, the hope that I had been clinging was not going to be snatched away from me.

"Thank you, I won't let you down." Was all I could mutter under my breath.

The rest of the night was spent sitting on the couch, watching Dirty Dancing. Personally, I hated the film, but it was Bella's favorite. It brought back memories of all the nights we would sit and watch it as she always won me over. She was curled up close to me singing along to the songs and sighing whenever Patrick Swayze took his shirt off, which seemed to be every couple of minutes for me. Right now, it was just nice to spend time with her.

Somehow, she closed the gap that had been between us, and curled up with a cushion, resting on my lap, and her head on it. Instinctively, I brushed my fingers through her hair, she didn't stop me, so I continued.

Once the movie ended, I looked down and saw she had fallen asleep. Bella looked so peaceful. I wanted to freeze this moment forever, never allowing it to change, but I knew it wasn't possible. It was late now, and I needed to leave, but I didn't want to disturb her. I sat there listening to her mutter to herself in her sleep. Eventually I plucked up the courage to move, checking all the time that I wasn't disturbing her. Every part of me wanted to scoop her up in my arms and carry her to the bedroom where I knew she should be, but I couldn't do it. I went to get her a blanket to cover her, only when I stepped into our, I mean her bedroom it was strange, the room was sparse and none of her things were where they should have been.

Confused, I turned around and looked back at her sleeping so peacefully, then I remembered her saying while I was gone, how she found it hard to be in our bed. Heading down the hall to the guest bedroom. Opening the door, I saw what should have been in the master suite and it pained me to think of her living like this still. She had told me while I was missing just how hard she found it to sleep in there without me. When I came home, everything went back to how it should have been, now it was all gone. I grabbed the throw from the bed and walked out to where she was still sleeping on the couch, placing it gently over her I leaned down and placed a gentle kiss on her head, intending to leave while she slept and was peaceful.

"Edward, please don't go. Stay." She muttered in her sleep. It warmed my heart to hear that her subconscious wanted me here, but I knew that I couldn't stay, it wouldn't be right. I leaned down, whispering in her ear.

"It's okay, you sleep." Sitting down next to her, she let out a sigh and seemed to settle knowing I was here. There was no way I could leave her now.

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><p><strong>Authors Note:<strong>

Thanks for reading, please do leave a review by hitting the little button below. There will be a second update this week – I promise!

This chapter is dedicated to a Tainted Tash – Happy Birthday hun. Tash is someone I know in my real life, and is a great supporter of both me and this story. Pre-read by Leigh Warner.


	38. This Night Is Ours

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or any of these characters. No copyright infringement is intended.**

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><p>I woke feeling sore and stiff, this was nothing new to me though. Countless nights spent sleeping on what passed for a bed in that hell hole, Volterra. At times it felt like I was sleeping on the floor the mattress was so thin. Stretching and opening my eyes, I realized I was free, the surroundings were familiar, but also strange at the same time. Then it dawned on me where I was, Bella's apartment, <em>our<em> apartment. The only thing missing from this was Bella. Looking around I couldn't see her anywhere, but the memory of last night kept me company, hearing her ask me to stay, even if it was in her sleep. I closed my eyes again, laying my head down on the cushion and drifted back into a peaceful sleep.

I was woken by the smell of coffee assaulting my nostrils. I struggled to get my eyes to open, they felt like lead. When they did, I was greeted by the sight of Bella kneeling down before me, a cup of coffee in her hand.

"Morning." I breathed, a smile forming,

"Huh, more like afternoon." She laughed.

Sitting upright I almost knocked the mug from her hand. "What time is it?"

Bella simply sat down on the couch, grinning at me. "It's just after one, why you got plans?"

"No, nothing. I just didn't mean to stay over, not like this. Shit! I mean, not that I wanted to stay over another time, just that I didn't mean to stay last night." The words came out in a mass jumble, all falling over each other and making no sense. I turned to face Bella and found her stifling a giggle. This was not the reaction I'd expected her to have, and this broke the tension that could've surrounded us.

My eyebrow quirked at her. "Are you mocking me, Miss Swan?" I teased.

She quickly removed the smile that'd played on her lips moments previously. "Certainly not Mr Cullen." Slowly, she got to her feet, moving until she was standing right in front of me. Her eyes fixed mine, but I couldn't work out what I was seeing as she stared at me, but there was something there. The silence between us was deafening, the tension in the air was palpable. I could feel it, and was sure if I reached out I would be able to touch and taste it. Her voice was barely audible. "You stayed with me, all night, I could feel you there. Even as I slept, I knew."

Continuing to look deep into her eyes, I was momentarily distracted as her tongue peeked out before it disappeared back into her mouth. There was nothing I wanted more than to kiss her, but would that be too much? Did she want this as much as I did, or was I misreading the signals that she was so clearly giving me. My hand reached up and cupped her cheek, relishing the feel of her soft skin against it, only it felt wrong to be touching her with hands that had beaten men to a pulp, and possibly even ended a life.

The memories caused me to pull away from her as if I had been shocked, I closed my eyes while I stood and moved away from her. Ashamed of what I had done, who I'd become. Walking away from her I went over to the large window and stared out, unsure of what to do next. I jumped when I felt Bella's hands snake around me, enveloping me as she pressed her body against mine.

"What's wrong?"She asked against my back.

Tears welled up in my eyes and I fought them back, as I found the words. "Nothing." I paused, collecting myself before continuing. "I should go."

Bella let go of me, and I missed the feel of her instantly, so I was relieved when she grabbed my arm, turning me to face her. "No. I don't want you to." Her hand reached out to touch my face, the action that had caused me to flinch, but this didn't stop her, there was no way I could resist her. Bella continued and stroked her fingers down my cheek. It was hard to breathe, part of me wanted to leave, run and never look back. Another part of my wanted this, wanted her more than anything in the world. There was no way to know which of these instincts would win out, all I did know was I had never felt so conflicted in my entire life.

"Edward, it's okay. I promise." She whispered. "I don't want you to go. Stay, with me."

All I could do was stand still as she moved closer to me, her hand continued to caress my cheek. I could feel her breath on me, she was so close. I wanted to kiss her, pull her to me and never let her go, but I couldn't risk it. I closed my eyes, thinking it would help, if I couldn't see her it would make it easier to resist. Then I felt her lips brush against mine. It was soft, gentle and felt like home. I allowed her to continue, afraid if I opened my eyes this would all be a dream.

Bella kissed me harder and the last shred of resolve I was clinging to was gone, so I began to move my lips against hers. There was a tenderness in our actions, as if the love and feelings we had for each other never seemed to have died despite everything we had been through. Her hands were pressed against my chest, gripping the fabric of my shirt. My hands were pressed on her back, keeping her close to me as our bodies reacted to each other once again. The noise someone hammering on the door broke through the bubble we were encased in.

Breaking away from her was hard and I muttered a curse under my breath wondering who on earth could be here, it crossed my mind to just ignore them. There was more knocking, which quickly turned into a steady pounding. "Ignore them." I growled out,

"It could be important, they seem quite insistent." Bella said as she walked away from me.

"Better be." I growled.

She turned with a playful smile on her lips just as she opened the door. It was like time was standing still, the door was pushed open wide, bouncing off the wall as three large men barged in. Bella was grabbed tightly, one arm wrapped around her body a hand covered her mouth, suppressing any scream that might come from her.

I froze in place as they made their way to me quickly grabbing hold of an arm each, stopping any possible movement I might have tried to make. Then into my line of sight, stepped a figure, whose presence made my blood run cold, and any thoughts of fighting back leave me. There before me stood James.

"Ah Cullen, I see the rumors of your survival were true. How stupid of you to come back here, to her, your whore. Predictable though." He sneered.

"No this can't be happening." I muttered just couldn't believe there were here. My eyes shot to Bella, she wasn't able to fight back, the man holding her was too strong. Her eyes pleaded with me and I saw the terror in them.

James walked closer to me. "Oh Cullen, you really have underestimated just how much we know, and what we are truly capable of. A huge mistake on your part." He let out a chuckle as he turned to the man holding Bella and took a couple of calculated steps toward her, a sinister smile playing on his lips. Seeing this sparked me into action and I rushed toward him, breaking free of the men holding me.

"No! Leave her alone, you bastard! Don't you dare touch her."

I was sent reeling into the wall from a backhander dished out by James.

"Sloppy Cullen, you have forgotten what you were taught already?" He didn't look at me, instead he moved closer to Bella. His fingers reached out and, gently stroked her cheek. She tried to pull away from his touch, but it was no use.

I got to my feet and tried to reach her, but was once again restrained. I struggled against the vice like grip, but it was no use. "Leave her alone, it's me you came for. Just take me." My voice carried bravery I didn't feel, but I would do anything to protect her.

James turned to me, a snarl on his lips. "No! You don't get to say what happens here, this is not your decision. We'll take you back to Volterra, and her? Well, I get her as a bonus for a job well done."

Bella fought even harder to be free, and I got free once again, running at James but he was ready for me. I found a gun, complete with silencer pointed straight at me, stopping me dead in my tracks. All I could do was hold my hands up in surrender. What I didn't see was how Bella got free from her captor, only that she had done and made a bid for freedom, running away from us. It was no use, James turned to her, aiming the gun and firing a single shot. I watched in horror as Bella fell to the floor with a sickening thud, blood pooling under her lifeless body.

A scream escaped from me, it didn't sound like anything I had ever heard before. My heart was breaking and I felt every single crack forming in it as the blood, and life ebbed from Bella.

I felt hands upon me, shaking me. I didn't want to look at her, I couldn't bear to look at the body lying before me, but I had to. This was my fault, and now they would take me away from her before she took her last breath and she would die alone.

"No!" I gasped. "Leave me alone, please!"

The hands became more insistent, shaking me violently by the shoulders, finally, a voice broke through.

"Edward! Please! Edward?"

It sounded like Bella, but I knew it couldn't be. Maybe I was dead too, and this was what waited for us beyond our time on earth, somehow we would be together.

My eyes snapped open and I found her leaning over me, very much alive. "Thank god! I couldn't wake you."

Sitting upright I was disorientated, but as I looked around the apartment I found I was on the couch, the night had not given way to dawn as yet, and Bella was here, she was alive.

The look on her face told me she was concerned, this was obvious when she spoke. "Are you okay? What happened?"

My chest was tight a I struggled to breathe, my hands scrubbed over my face. "They were here, they came for me. You… you." I paused, afraid to say the words, yet I found the courage, but could barely manage to whisper. "You were dead, he killed you."

"It's okay, it was a nightmare, nothing more." She attempted to reassure me.

"You don't understand Bella, it felt real. I tried to stop them, to protect you, but I couldn't do anything to stop him."

Bella pulled me into her arms. "I'm safe, you're safe. No-one is here, it's just me and you."

It might have been just a nightmare to her, but it felt real. I had lived through the sadistic nature of that man, I knew what he was capable of first hand. Truly, I believed James was here in the apartment. There was no way I remain here, not when I knew that my very presence anywhere in her life, not just the apartment could mean she became a target for them.

There was nothing I could do other than leave before the nightmare became a reality. Above all else I had to keep Bella safe, and alive. If that meant leaving her life, forever.

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><p><strong>Authors Note:<strong>

Thanks go out as always to Leigh Warner for pre-reading this and talking me down when I talk myself onto the ledge. Updates will be quicker as I have been writing up a storm on this. Not sure how many more chapters there will be but, we are coming to the closing stages.

Thank YOU for reading and if you would like to leave a review, please hit the little button below. If anyone wants to find me on Facebook I am on there, Loopy Lou (look for the Fraggle) as I also have a group for my fics where I post teasers and pictures. New members are always welcome.


	39. Runaway

**t own Twilight or any of these characters. No copyright ****infringement****is**** intended.**

Staying away from Bella was hard, she called me repeatedly and I made excuses for why I couldn't see her. Deep down I think she knew the real reason. I had been petrified when she woke me and there was nothing I could say, or do to change that fact she'd seen that side of me. It had all felt so real, I could feel his hands on me, sense Bella's terror as she realized who he was, and what he wanted. It might have all been a nightmare, but I was all too aware of the fact it could happen. Bella didn't deserve any of this in her life, she didn't need to be dragged into this. If I could do nothing else, I could try to protect her from it.

I needed to get away, but where would I go? A grown man who was afraid of the unexpected knock on the door in case it was them. I thought about heading up to the lake house, the tranquility and peace that was afforded by the location would be perfect, but I never knew who was watching, who knew about the place. Waking in the middle of the night from the same nightmare that I'd had at Bella's apartment my heart was pounding heavily against my chest as a sheen of sweat covered my body I knew my decision had been made for me. I had to leave, now.

Getting dressed quickly the essentials were thrown into a bag, changes of clothing and toiletries, just enough to get me through until I knew what to do next. I scribbled a quick note and stuck it to the fridge.

_Sorry, I gotta get some space._

_Will call you soon. Please don't worry_

_Edward_

I climbed into the car and drove through the quiet streets constantly checking in the rear view mirror to make sure I wasn't being followed. The drive took me longer than it should as I doubled back on myself several times. Maybe my paranoia was getting the better of me, but I had to be sure. Pulling into the drive I killed the lights and parked the car in the garage out of sight. It felt good to be here, the tranquility of the place already calming my nerves.

What I didn't expect and account for were the feelings that overwhelmed me when I opened the front door, remembering the last time I was here, when I admitted to my family and to Bella what had happened to me while I had been gone.

The house was silent, not that I expected anything else. I made my way through the lounge, and threw open the French windows that led outside. I could hear the sound of the water as it lapped against the shore, the sound and smell so familiar and comforting to me. This was like a safe haven for me. I walked back inside, grabbing one of the throws from the couch and glanced at my watch, it. Was just after 4am, but yet I didn't feel tired in the slightest. I settled down on the seating, surrounding myself in the warmth of the blanket while I stared out over the lake. It was so peaceful here, no worries about people finding me, no need to pretend everything was okay. I let out a deep sigh and relaxed. I could feel the stress and tension leaving me with each breath that I took.

I felt bad about leaving so suddenly. But knew, deep down Carlisle and Esme would understand, hell they would probably guess where I was right now. I made up my mind to call them at a decent hour and let them know I was okay. I sat and watched the moonlight as it glinted off the water, seeing in the distance the bright lights of the city, it was so close, yet a million miles away from where I needed to be. Closing my eyes, I drifted off to sleep.

Warmth was what woke me, the suns rays on my skin were a very welcome to wake up for me. I stretched and yawned, slightly confused as to where I was for a split second, then I remembered it all. Waking from the nightmare, packing a bag and leaving in the dead of night like some kind of fugitive on the run. Standing upright, I felt every part of my body protest at sleeping on the lounger. In all honesty, I hadn't meant to, but exhaustion must've won the battle and sent me to sleep.

Making my way inside I put a pot of coffee on before I grabbed my cell phone from the counter where I had dropped it with the keys when I got here. 18 missed calls and 3 voice mails. Shit! Going through the list, 17 were from Carlisle and Esme, 1 was from Bella, I knew she would've left a message, just like she had done every other time she had called, and I'd avoided her. Dialling my voicemail I poured myself a cup of coffee.

"Edward, where are you? Please call me, you can't just leave like this. Let me know your okay." That was Esme, she sounded frantic and I felt like an asshole.

"Son, I have no idea what's going on, your mom is beside herself with worry. Call me before I call the police." Shit, Carlisle was worried now.

"Hey Edward, just me, checking in on you. I know you're listening to these messages, or at least I hope you are otherwise I feel like a right idiot. Anyway, call me if you want to talk." Just hearing her voice lifted my spirits.

I saved her message, just like I'd done with all the others she'd left. Holding the phone in my hand, I almost dropped it when it rang immediately. The caller ID showing me it was Esme calling me. Gingerly, I answered and put the phone to my ear, half expecting her to shout at me.

"Hi mom." I hoped this would placate her, I was wrong.

"Edward Anthony Cullen! How could you do that to me. A note? A freaking note! Sneaking out of here in the middle of the night like some criminal. Do you have any idea how worried I was when I found it, do you?" I could hear the anger, mixed with relief in her voice as she scolded me.

"Sorry mom." Was all I could manage.

"Don't you sorry mom me. I almost called the police, your father persuaded me not to. Where the hell are you? Please tell me you're safe, not, like..."

She never finished that sentence, a sob breaking out in her voice,

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to worry you, I'm safe, I promise you."

"Edward?" The voice of Carlisle came on the line.

"Hey dad."

"Thank Christ you're okay. Your mom has been frantic here, where are you? We'll come and get you." He sounded a strange mixture of pissed and relieved.

"I'm at the lake house, but please don't come up here. I need to be on my own for a few days, just to get some space and think everything through in my own mind."

"Okay, son. Promise me you will call if you need anything, even if it's to talk. No one will know you are there, I promised. Keep in touch." There was concern in his voice.

"Thanks, I will." I confirmed, "Oh, there is one thing. I'm going to need some groceries and I don't want to-"

"Consider it done. I'll call the housekeeping service, have them bring over the usual. I'll tell them I'm coming up there tonight. Stay out of sight until they have been, okay?"

"I can never thank you enough."

"No need to thank me, son."

With that, the call ended.

Knowing someone would come over with groceries, I cleaned up the kitchen, hiding any evidence anyone has been here. Then I took my bag upstairs to the attic bedroom. No one could know I was here not even the housekeeping service my father used. I would just have to stay out of sight until I knew they had been. Tiredness washed over me once again, so I stripped down to my boxers and climbed under the duvet. Instantly I remembered the last time I had been here, in this room. How I had made love to Bella, putting every ounce of emotion, care and compassion I could into it. Wanting to show her I could be the man I was before my abduction. When I knew the bitter truth, he was gone, never to return. The man who managed to escape the claws of Aro returned to her damaged shell of what I used to be and badly flawed. The mental and emotional scars of my time with him running deep inside me, something that might never heal.

I clung to the hope we could have a future together, Bella had said she wanted to give us a chance, and I did too. But there was always the thought in the back of my mind that somehow Aro would find out and strike out, hurting her in an attempt to hurt me. Until I could reconcile this, and work out how to live with that threat every single day it seemed best I stayed away from her, just in case.

When I woke up I was confused about where I was, looking around the room as I blinked the sleep from my eyes. Getting out of bed, I threw on the clothes worn earlier and headed downstairs. The housekeeping service had been, there was fruit in the bowl on the table and fresh flowers in a vase on the fireplace. Now I was safe to wander around the house knowing I was going to be left alone.

The night was spent once again sitting on the deck, staring out over the still water. My brain was surprisingly silent for the first time in longer than I cared to remember and the silence was both welcome, and scary. There were no random thoughts plaguing me, no voices in the back of my mind telling me it wasn't safe for me, that someone was watching me, waiting for the right moment to rip me away from the arms of my family and back into that dark and desperate world once again.

The hustle and noise of the city seemed so far away, but it was still within reach if I felt the need to return. Honestly, I had no idea when I set off to come here how long I would be staying, but all I knew was I needed to get away. Did that make me a coward? Was I running away from the issue? Probably. But I needed to get that distance to work through in my own mind if Bella and I giving 'us' another go was right for her. Yes, that makes me a complete ass, mainly as this was what I had fought for. Now, I was faced with the realization it might have been what I wanted, but was it right for her? Just being with me would put her in danger, would everything we could possibly gain from being together be worth the risks involved?

A restful nights sleep left me feeling exhausted, that amused me. Exactly how could having more rest make me feel quite so bad? After a quick shower, I fixed myself some toast and coffee, taking it outside to feel the warmth of the sun on my face. The ability to feel the sun or the breeze on me when I chose was one of the things I missed during my incarceration. Glancing at my cellphone there were a couple of missed calls from Bella, along with matching voicemails. There was nothing from my parents, obviously they knew I was okay and would check in with them just to confirm I was okay. With that thought in my mind, I called Esme just to put her mind at rest.

Once I had eaten, I took my mug and plate into the kitchen before I walked out onto the lake front beach. Despite the clement weather I wore my hoodie and pulled my baseball cap down in an attempt to cover my face. There wouldn't be many people up here during the week, I knew this, but I wanted to be sure no one who saw me, would instantly recognize me. Like my parents, many of the people who owned houses on this stretch of Lake Michigan used them as a second home, inhabiting them on holidays or weekends. Better safe than sorry though. After a few warm up stretches, I put my iPod earphones into my ears and began to run.

Something about the action of running gave me comfort, maybe it was the physical exertion on my body, or the fact it was regimented. In a way it reminded me of being Aro's puppet and those seemingly never ending training sessions where I would be forced to run on the treadmill for what seemed like hours. Sometimes I knew it was hours, my body would beg for rest, but none would be given. Now I could stop when I chose, but still I pushed my body to it's limits, knowing I needed to remain in the best physical condition, just in case.

When I returned to the house, dusk had begun to fall and I was exhausted. My chest hurt as I struggled to get my breath, bending over I rested my hands on my knees as I gasped for air. Eventually I made my way into the house, heading straight for the kitchen where I opened the fridge and downed a bottle of ice cold water. Then I heard a noise. There were the sounds of someone moving about the house. Immediately I froze. No-one should have been here, had my parents planned to come here, they would have told me this morning, They knew I needed to be alone here, plus if it had been them, one of them would have remained in sight, knowing how I might react.

Listening to the noises, I discerned someone was upstairs, but there was only one set of footsteps as far as I could tell, but I could be wrong. My heart began to pound as I glanced towards the front door and found it closed, no signs of a forced entry to be seen. This had to be the work of Aro, finally he had found me when I was at my most vulnerable, when no-one would know what had happened to me, or possibly discover my absence for days. This time I wouldn't go without a fight, if they wanted me there was no way I would let them win easily, I was better prepared for them this time.

With my back pressed flush against the kitchen wall I waited, listening to their movements on the floor above me. I knew they would possibly be armed, so I would need to improvise. Glancing around my eyes settled on the knife block sat on the counter, not ideal, but it was the best I could hope for given the circumstances. Pulling the largest knife slowly from the block, the blade glinted in the late afternoon sun. Placing my back against the wall once again I waited. They obviously either didn't know, or didn't care I was here, hopefully it was the first of the two scenarios.

Time passed and the night drew further in, casting the house into darkness, yet still I waited, cursing myself for leaving my phone on the coffee table in the lounge. Chancing a glance toward it, I wondered if there was any way it could be reached allowing me to alert someone, anyone, to my situation. Even if was too late for them to help me, they would know what happened here.

Then I heard it, the sound of footsteps coming down the stairs, pausing as I guessed they surveyed the room. They began to walk toward where I was hiding, this was it. Now or never. Blood began to pound in my ears as terror rose in me. A small voice inside told me to be strong, that it was kill or be killed, there was no other way around this. They would show me no mercy, so I could show none to them. Of course, that didn't mean I couldn't have any fun first.

They came toward the kitchen, there was still only one set of footsteps from what I could make out, but at least if there were others I would have one of their associates as a bargaining tool. I heard them pause and then I made my move. Slow, deliberate steps took me from my hiding place and into the doorway, my hand wrapped tightly around the handle of the knife as I reached out with my free arm, pulling a small figure back toward me, placing the blade against their throat.

"Don't move. Not an inch or I will slit your throat where you stand." I growled. "How many of you are there? Tell me." The blade pressed into their skin, I knew it would cause them some pain, and also show them I meant business.

There was a gasp from the person I had in my grasp. "Edward! It's me, please don't hurt me." The words were almost inaudible, but instantly I recognized the voice. I pulled back in a mixture of shock and horror, snapping the kitchen light on.

"Bella! What are you doing here?" I dropped the knife to the floor as I stared into her eyes. She looked, quite rightly terrified of me. "Shit! I'm sorry, I thought you were, them." I whispered.

"Who? Do you mean Aro's men? Shit, Sorry I never thought."

Her hand went up to her throat, as she pulled it away, I could see there was a small trickle of blood coming from the place where the knife had been. Instinctively I moved toward her, but she stepped back from me.

"Bella, I'm-"

"Don't." She interrupted me. "Just don't let the next words you speak be, sorry. Because I thought we were past all that." She moved closer to me. "This is my fault, I never thought when I got here. I should've stayed where you could see me. I did call, did you not get my message?"

I shook my head. "No, I've been out for a run."

"That would explain where you were, I did wonder where you were." She wrapped her arms around me, pulling me to her. "It's okay, I promise."

Relaxing in her arms, I allowed myself to fall loosely around her waist, holding her to me. I felt. We stood like that for only minutes, but it felt like forever. "Edward, I think we should get some sleep. I don't know about you, but I am exhausted."

I nodded. "How long are you staying for?"

"Well, I don't have to be back until Thursday morning, so that gives me three days free. That is if you want me to stay?" She pulled back from me, looking into my eyes. I smiled and nodded.

"I would love you to stay."

-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-

We eventually made our way upstairs to the bedrooms, I paused, unsure if Bella would want a room on her own, but was pleasantly surprised when she walked into the bedroom I had chosen. I gave her some space, using the family bathroom on the floor below. I walked into the bedroom and got into bed, glad I had packed a pair of sleep pants. I watched as she walked out of the bathroom, dressed in a pair of my pajama bottoms which were a couple of sizes too big for her and a tank top. I must say, she looked adorable and very sexy.

Bella got into bed beside me, and curled into my chest, my arm went around her, holding her to me as I breathed in her scent. I placed gentle kisses on the top of her head while she traced circles on my bare chest with her fingertips. This, right here was my nirvana. Bella was my sanctuary, she kept me calm. With her by my side, I felt like I could conquer anything.

* * *

><p><strong>Authors Note:<strong>  
>Nope, your eyes do not deceive you, this is the second update in as many days. I just wanted to get this out there. Thanks go out as always to Leigh Warner for pre-reading. Updates will be quicker as I have been writing up a storm on this. Not sure how many more chapters there will be but, we are coming to the closing stages.<p>

Thank YOU for reading and if you would like to leave a review, please hit the little button below. If anyone wants to find me on Facebook I am on there, Loopy Lou (look or the Fraggle) as I also have a group for my fics where I post teasers and pictures. New members are always welcome.


	40. Dreams & Nightmares

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended.**

* * *

><p>I woke with a start, sitting upright in bed. Immediately I turned to see if I had disturbed Bella, luckily I hadn't. Laying back down I glanced at the clock and found it was 3am but even at this ungodly hour I found my mind was racing, keeping me from falling back asleep. Bella was sound asleep at my side, I watched her as she slept, looking so peaceful and happy. I had missed something as simple as this, watching her sleep. By staying here awake and restless I risked waking her up, and there was no way I wanted that to happen. So, I slipped out of bed, chancing a glance back at her before I left and made my way downstairs hoping to find something to occupy me.<p>

Even though I knew we were alone, I still paused at the bottom of the stairs, listening for any unusual noises before I made my way to the kitchen to grab a can of soda from the fridge. Once I had this, I lounged on the couch, mindlessly flicking through the numerous cable channels in the hope of finding something that would either entertain me, or make me sleepy. I ended up watching a music channel only because there was nothing better for me to do. I kept the volume low, so as not to risk disturbing Bella. Several mindless videos followed one another before I became aware of hearing footsteps on the stairs. Turning toward her, I saw she was smiling at me. My plan to be quiet had clearly not worked.

"Hey." Was all I could say.

So rubbed her eyes and yawned. "I woke up and you were gone."

"Sorry, I couldn't sleep and I didn't want to disturb you." I said as I further turned down the volume.

"You didn't. I" She breathed, taking small steps toward me while never losing eye contact. I could feel my body react to that look, I remembered it very well. Swallowing deeply I tried to push this to the back of my mind, convinced I was imagining the way she was looking at me, then she extended her hand out to me as she got closer. "Come back to bed Edward." She asked of me.

"I'm not tired, it's not fair on you." I answered.

Almost in a whisper I heard her say. "Neither am I now. Come to bed with me, make love to me Edward."

I stared at her, unsure if I'd heard her right. Then, with one word I knew I had. She tilted her head to one side. "Please?"

Emotions flooded through me, Bella was standing here before me and she was asking me to take her to bed and make love to her. I felt like I was dreaming, although I hoped that I wasn't. Although this would be more of a nightmare than a dream if I were to wake and find it hadn't happened.

"Edward, I want you. I want this." She breathed.

My head began to nod in response, she reached out her other hand to me, which I took hold of, allowing her to pull me up from the couch toward her. We were standing staring at each other, eyes surveying each other's faces as if we were seeing each other for the first time. We moved closer together until I could feel her breath on my face, our lips eventually met. What started out as soft, gentle brushes against each other lips soon became needy and filled with passion. I pulled her to me, not wanting to lose the contact we had. Her hands weaved into my hair as she refused to let me go. A deep moan escaped my throat as my body reacted to the stimulation of hers upon mine. Then, when I least expected it Bella's hands rested on my shoulders as she pushed me away from her. I was surprised, thinking maybe I'd taken things a step too far given what had gone before. Once again she took my hand in hers and led me upstairs. I decided if this was a dream, it was the best one I'd ever had.

In silence I followed her upstairs to the bedroom, my heart was pounding hard against my chest, it felt like it would break through at any moment. Bella took the lead, I was like a virgin all over again, nervous and totally unsure of myself. She seemed to sense this and guided me to the bed we had shared previously. Bella then pushed me back onto it, smiling as I hit the mattress a look of surprise on my face, before she straddled me, reclaiming my lips with hers. My hands grabbed her hips, holding them as she moved above me. I knew she would be able to feel my erection as it strained against the flimsy fabric of my sleep pants, in these, there was nowhere for me to hide it. Without meaning to, I found myself raising my hips, meeting hers. Deep, lust filled groans filled the air along with the sound of our lips as we kissed. My hands moved upwards from her hips, sliding under her tank top. The soft skin cried out to be touched and caressed. I felt like I'd died and gone to heaven, then I froze in a moment of panic. The dream I'd had last time I was with her played out in my mind, I saw her lifeless body lying on the ground. Knowing there was nothing I could do to protect her if Aro decided to act.

I turned my head away from her, screwing my eyes shut my breathing became more irregular as I fought to regain control. Bella's hands quickly found my face as she touched my cheek. "Edward, what's wrong?" She asked. I shook my head in answer, unable to vocalize the words required. This didn't stop her. "Don't do this to me, don't you dare push me away again."

Pushing her off me, onto the bed, I hissed. "I'm trying to protect you. Can't you see that?" My eyes snapped open and I sat upright as I heard her shift on the bed. She was kneeling next to me.

"What, by pushing me away, hurting me more than I have been already? Don't you see, it only hurts us both. Nothing is going to happen to us, we're safe here."

I ached to touch her, hold her to me and never let her go, Pinching the bridge of my nose I tried to explain. "You were gone, they'd…they'd Killed you." I managed to breathe out.

"I'm here, that was a nightmare, it wasn't real." She wrapped her arms around me and whispered into my hair. "I'm alive, I want you and I'm sure as hell not going anywhere."

If we did this, there would be no going back, it would signal a change in the fragile relationship we were clinging to. It would mean things had changed between us. We would be moving forward, away from the past and moving on. But would we ever really be safe while Aro was out there? I feared I would always be looking over my shoulder, afraid of what might have happened if Bella came home later than planned. Something so innocent could have devastating consequences, for both of us. But I couldn't live with that constant fear, she deserved more, but if what she wanted was me, us, then how could I refuse her anything.

I felt soft kisses on my cheek and my body reacted. Bella was right, it was only a nightmare, we were safe and together. What else did I need? Finally, her trail of kisses made its way to my lips, where she placed a chaste kiss upon them before she murmured. "Now, where were we?"

Bella retook her previous position astride me, only this time we were both sitting upright. The kisses that followed were searing in their intensity, and I wasn't afraid to let go anymore. She wanted this, she wanted me. With a primal growl, I took hold of her and threw her onto the bed where I positioned myself over her. She let out a shriek of surprise before relaxing as she knew I wouldn't hurt her. Her hands roamed my bare chest as lust and need filled her eyes, I was sure if I had a mirror, I would see exactly the same being reflected from me.

"Edward, please?" She begged as I ground into her, making her hips roll with mine. I removed myself from her, resting my hands on the waistband of the sleep pants she was wearing. Instinctively her hips raised at my touch, so I began to slide them slowly down her legs, taking in every single inch of her skin as it was exposed to me. Once they were removed, she pulled off the tank top she had been wearing, casting aside. I closed my eyes momentarily at the sight of her, naked and wanting me, it was almost too much for me to comprehend.

A single word fell from my lips. "Beautiful." I was greeted with a smile and her beckoning me. Resting my elbows on either side of her, supporting the majority of my own weight, I kissed her once again, pushing my hips against her now naked body. I felt her hands on my own sleep pants, hearing her utter one word, I assumed it was in relation to the offending item of clothing.

"Off."

With her help I managed to wriggle out of them, while she kissed me. When I was naked, I pressed my erection against her, earning a moan of pure delight and a demand. "Please Edward, I need you."

I smiled as I answered her. "I don't think I can be gentle, you deserve more."

Bella rolled her eyes, and her hips. "I don't care, I just want you, make love to me later. Now, just fuck me."

Her words cause a primal response in me, and before I could register my actions, I was thrusting hard and deep into her, causing her to cry out in pleasure. Her hands clawed at my back, the sensations overwhelming me. "Shit, Bella." I spat out before I kissed her once again. Our bodies melded together, and it felt like we had never been apart as we reconnected in the basest and instinctual of ways. It honestly felt like I wasn't in control of my body or mind as my hips pulled back only to snap back to her once again. Every thrust made me fear I was going to lose my sanity. I could feel my orgasm building quickly, and I felt like I was cheating her of the experience she deserved. She asked me to make love to her, yet here we were fucking like animals as I couldn't control my actions, but there was no way for me to stop, or even slow down. My body had been like a tightly coiled spring and now, well it was free.

"Bella, I'm not gonna last." I gasped out, almost ashamed at the admission.

"Thank god, me neither." She replied as she wrapped her legs around my waist, changing the angle and taking me deeper inside her.

"Fuck!" I spat out as the sensation overwhelmed me and set off a chain reaction inside me. My breathing became short pants as my body trembled from head to toe and everywhere in between. I continued to thrust inside her as the feelings washed over me like a tidal wave. My orgasm took my breath away as I shuddered with each wave of release flooded her. Then I felt her begin to tighten around me, the profanities falling from her lips were worse than I ever remembered hearing.

Once we both managed to catch our breath, I pulled out of her, rolling onto my back on the mattress. I was physically exhausted, my breathing was heavy as I gasped for air. Bella curled into my side, her head nestled on my shoulder, her hand resting lazily on my chest where she traced circles with her fingers. Every now and again, my body would react and she would elicit a small chuckle. We didn't speak, no words seemed necessary, what we had just experienced together was enough for both of us. My eyes were heavy as I gazed out of the window and saw the dawn begin to break, the first glimpses of daylight filtering into our bubble. I fell asleep to the sound of Bella's breathing, and the feel of it on my chest. There really was no better way to fall asleep. Tired, sated and with the woman I loved more than anything in my arms.

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><p><strong>Authors Note:<strong>  
>Thanks to Leigh Warner for pre-reading for me, I need someone to tell me I'm getting this right.<p>

I hope you enjoyed our two getting their groove on and the slight citrus this produced. It might seem a little quick, but Bella is in charge here, she is instigating everything. The doubts that come from him are his own demons and they will not go away overnight, but know that he does love her very much.

Sorry this chapter wasn't longer, but the next one will post in the next couple of days,


	41. The Calm Before

**Disclaimer. I do not own Twilight or any of these characters. No copyright infringement is intended**

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><p>As I woke the sun was warm on my skin, it felt great. I turned over to reach out for Bella, only to find her side of the bed was empty and cold. I knew I hadn't imagined or dreamed last night, the ache in my body told me that much. Hearing noises from downstairs, I knew that was where she was. Rolling onto my back, images of last night flooded my mind, how good it felt to hold her, to feel her surrounding me as we joined together. Then my brain reminded me, Bella had asked me to make love to her, and I couldn't do it. Instead, I took her body and used it for my own needs and release. I felt ashamed of my actions. Last night should have been about us reconnecting as a couple, showing her with my actions where words were not enough, just how much I loved her.<p>

Getting out of bed, I headed straight for the shower, needing to wash away my perceived sins from the previous night. The warm water soothed me somewhat, giving me time to think. First, there would be the grovelling apology to Bella, all I could hope was she would forgive me. I vaguely had the recollection of her telling me it was okay, but words spoken in the heat of passion couldn't truly be trusted but obviously neither could my actions.

After I had showered and dressed, I made my way downstairs and found Bella in the kitchen. Walking up behind her as she stood at the stove, all thoughts of apologizing were forgotten for the moment as I pressed up against her body, wrapping my arms around her waist, securing her to me. I nuzzled my face into her neck, placing soft, gentle kisses on her neck and shoulder. My voice was deep as I spoke, "Morning.

"Morning to you too. I hope you're hungry." She answered. "I'm sure you must've worked up one hell of an appetite after last night." Turning her head to me slightly I could see the smile playing on her lips. "Cause I sure did."

I nodded before I stepped back from her. "About that, I didn't mean to treat you like that, I wish I could take it back, do it differently. Last night-"

Bella interrupted me. "Was wonderful. Don't you dare take away what happened. We needed it, god knows I needed you every bit as much as you needed me. Yeah, it wasn't all hearts, flowers and romance, but would I change it? Hell no."

Her face told me she was telling the truth, but I still felt bad. "But it shouldn't have been that way, not after everything. It won't happen again."

"Edward Cullen, don't you dare do this. I told you last night was great, I don't care if it turned into what it did, or if you spent hours teasing me and then worshipped my body all night. What was important, was _us_, that we reconnected with each other. It doesn't matter that we both got carried away in the heat of the moment, what matters is what we had and I wouldn't change it for the world."

Bella was now standing before me looking deep into my eyes. "I mean it Edward. I needed you last night to just be with me."

I bent down to place a kiss on her lips. "I needed you too." She smiled at me. "I think something might be burning." I teased looking over her shoulder to where there was smoke coming from the toaster.

"Shit!" She dashed over and ejected the now charcoal slices of bread, wafting the smoke around. I went and opened the window to let the smoke out, while I chuckled at her.

We set about fixing more toast and ate breakfast before heading out onto the lake front together. The remainder of the day was spent walking hand in hand, enjoying each other's company in the fresh air and peace that surrounded us. We made our way back to the house, Bella decided to sit on the deck while I went for my now ritual run. I promised her I wouldn't take long. I needed this time to work through things in my head and to try and work off some of the tensions that had built up inside me.

When I returned I found Bella sat at the dining table, laptop open in front of her deep in thought. Standing, leaning against the doorframe I was covered in sweat, not wanting to get too close, I spoke. "Hey, what you doing?"

She jumped slightly. "Shit! You made me jump, I didn't hear you come back." Her eyes raked my body, clearly liking what she saw. I felt slightly self-conscious given that I was wearing shorts and work out top, I went to grab the towel I had left on the couch, and could feel her eyes on me the whole time.

"I should go shower." I mumbled before heading upstairs. Once I was showered and dressed I went back downstairs to find Bella still sat at her laptop. This time, she noticed me.

"Hey, sorry about before. I kinda got distracted." She blushed.

"Don't worry, it's okay." I replied.

"No, it's not. It's strange, seeing you look so… muscular. It's not a bad thing though, just not what I am used to." I could tell she was careful with her words. "Have you been running for long?"

"A few weeks now. Emmett encouraged me to do it as a way to get rid of the tension and frustration that was building inside me. I combine it with some gym sessions. It helps."

"Well, I can certainly see the benefit." She teased with a small giggle.

"So what are you working on?" I asked motioning to the laptop, desperate to change the subject.

"The book launch on Thursday. There have been one or two last minute issues I need to attend to." She sighed.

"Is this the event you have to be back for?"

"Yes, I tried to get out of it, but the author is a first timer and I need to be there to hold her hand through it. Normally I would ask Leah, but she's not able to cover it." Bella looked at me. "I want to be here, with you."

I smiled at her, before walking over to her, kissing her deeply. "I want you here too, I don't ever want to let you go again."

Bella smiled at me. "I just need to sort out the issue with the caterer, once it's cleared up I am all yours. I promise."

Nodding, I went to relax on the couch while I waited for her to finish. I hadn't realized tired must've been until I was woken by a gentle kiss, instinctively I pulled her to me, she ended up lying on top of me, and we made out like a pair of horny teenagers. Only stopping when the doorbell rang. Instantly I sat up, panic beginning to rise in me. No-one should be coming to the house.

Bella went to stand up, and I pulled her back onto the couch. "Don't answer it." I whispered. She swatted my hand away.

"It's only the delivery driver. I ordered takeaway for us." I watched in shock as she skipped over to answer the door, collecting her purse from the table on the way. I listened as Bella greeted the person, and paid them before closing the door. She turned to look at me, seeing the look of panic that was clearly on my face.

"What's wrong?" She asked depositing the containers on the table.

"It's nothing, I just need to get a grip on myself." I whispered.

"No, it's not nothing, is it, I can see it written on your face. Tell me, no more secrets, remember?"

I looked at her, knowing I had to tell her. "I panicked, I tend to when someone arrives unexpectedly. You saw my reaction the other night when you were here and I wasn't expecting you. I thought someone had found out where we were, that they had come for me."

"Oh shit! I never thought, I'm sorry, I could've waited until you were awake, but you looked so peaceful." She walked over to me and embraced me.

"It's okay, I need to work on this. Rationally, I know the chances of them finding me, here are slim, but it could happen." I palmed her face. "What did you order?"

"Your favorite Chinese, I got all your favorite dishes." She went to the kitchen and brought out some plates and began to open the containers so we could eat before it got cold.

We spent the evening watching movies and enjoying each other's company before we prepared to head upstairs to bed.

Once we were in bed, our hands began to roam and explore the other body, we took our time, it was like being with her for the first time all over again. Each touch of my hand against her skin elicited a reaction in her which in turn caused the same

To be reflected in me. We kissed our lips meeting with mutual need. There was no rush, no need to consume the other person, to control them. This was solely about us, Edward and Bella, nothing outside of these four walls existed or mattered. It was heaven.

Finally, we made love for hours, and I can say made love as there was nothing rushed or forced about it. I truly worshipped her body with my own, drawing out every single second of pleasure from our interaction until neither of us could give any more. Exhausted, we fell asleep, locked in each other's arms.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-

Our final full day together was spent trying to pretend that the real world wasn't threatening to invade the bubble we had built around ourselves while we had been here. Bella told me all about the book launch, she was really excited now that everything had fallen into place. She told me they had hired one of the function rooms at the Chicago Cultural Center. Bella had always loved the building, it looked plain from the outside, but once you were inside the architecture was stunning. It was the place she had at the top of her list of places to marry if we didn't elope to Las Vegas, or do it on a deserted Carribean beach somewhere. Yes, we had talked about it, but all that seemed like a lifetime ago.

Bella asked me to meet her afterwards, telling me she planned to be out of there by 6.30pm at the latest. Then she looked at me as if I wouldn't be able to make it. Taking a deep breath, I told her nothing would stop me from meeting her. She seemed surprised when I suggested taking her out to dinner to celebrate, but she didn't say no. Our plans were set, although what would happen once we were back in Chicago and outside the tranquillity of the lake house, no one knew. But we were willing to give it a try.

Our last night together we lay in bed, staring at each other. I had an urge to ask her a question, needing to know.

"Bella, can I ask you something? You can refuse to answer." I kept eye contact with her.

"Of course, anything. No secrets, remember?" She kissed her index finger and placed it against my lips.

"Your apartment, when I came over to see you. Our bedroom was empty, your things were in the spare room." I watched as she broke eye contact with me.

"I couldn't be in there, it hurt too much. It was like you were gone all over again, seeing our things, your things and knowing you wouldn't be coming back. I had to get out. The spare room was the best option for me." Her eyes met mine once again,

I smiled at her, knowing what she was saying to me. "I'm sorry. I know I promised not to say that anymore, but if I could go back and take away the pain I caused, I would in a heartbeat, anything-"

The sentence was never finished as her lips met mine, silencing me with a kiss that told me without words how she felt. Once we parted, she whispered against my lips. "I love you Edward. I don't want to lose you ever again."

I stared at her, unsure if I had heard the words correctly. My lack of response caused her to playfully punch my chest. "Hey! It's not every day someone says that to you is it?"

"No, I am just surprised. I mean, I know things seem to be going in the right direction, but I didn't dare hope we could have anything more than this." I indicated between us.

"Oh, so you thought I was the type of girl who turns up at your parents' lake house knowing you're here alone, seduces you into sleeping with her, tells you she loves you all because I was playing with you? Oh, and orders all your favorite takeaway for you." She pushed me in a playful way, causing me to laugh.

"Okay, okay. This takes some getting used to. I mean, don't get me wrong, I'm not complaining at having the hottest woman in the continental US tell me that despite me doing nothing to deserve it, that she loves me."

Bella smiled at me. "Yeah, it's taken me a while to come to terms with how I feel about you. I won't lie, there are times when it would have been easier to walk away, forget about you. But something in here." She took hold of my hand, placing in on her chest. "Wouldn't let go. So, here we are. I know I told you we should take it slowly, but I'm done with playing it safe. I love you with all my heart, and even if I can't say I totally forgive some of the things that happened, but I want us to move on with our future together."

"I love you too Bella, I really can't begin to tell you what this means to me. I want to put this behind me, but I doubt I will ever be the man I was before. It worries me is you won't like the new man you find yourself with, that one day you are going to wake up and hate me. That would kill me, having had you back in my life. I'm not saying this to make you stay with me through guilt, but I have to tell you this so you know how I feel. Above all else, I love you. Always have and always will. I never expected you to want me back, and I will do everything I can to show you I deserve this second chance."

Once again, she kissed me, this time there was more passion behind it and we found ourselves in a tangle of arms and legs as we came together once again to seal our declarations of love.

-0-0-0-0-0-

Morning came too quickly for my liking. When I opened my eyes, the dawn was only just breaking yet I saw Bella packing the small bag she has brought with her. This was it, she was leaving. We'd agreed that she would go back early as she wanted to make sure everything was perfect for the launch party. I would be going back later in the day but would meet her later.

"Hey." I groaned out. "I thought I'd missed you."

She smiled at me, walking over to the bed, bending down and planting a kiss on my forehead. "No, I would've woken you before I left."

I reached out and pulled her down onto the bed where I wrapped my arms around her, playfully holding her to me. Bella laughed and wriggled. "Get off me, I need to leave." She protested.

"Never, now I have you I don't want to let you go." I murmured into her hair.

"You'll see me tonight, it's not that long." She joked as she managed to get free of me. "If I leave now, I should miss the morning traffic."

I decided to play dirty, dramatically throwing myself back on the bed with the duvet over my head. "Fine, abandon me. I'll survive somehow."

Bella wasn't falling for it, and when I peered out I was alone. I quickly got out of bed, throwing on my jeans and headed downstairs, finding her getting her car keys out of her purse. She turned to me. "I knew you wouldn't be able to let me leave without saying goodbye."

I walked over to her, pulling her into my arms. "Never." We parted and took her bags out to the car, and once they were in the trunk she opened the driver's door, ready to climb behind the wheel. She paused to look at me.

"I'm missing you already." Bella leaned toward me and I pulled back.

"Morning breath." I indicated to my mouth.

"I don't care." She muttered against my lips as we kissed.

Finally, we broke apart and Bella got in the car and drove away. I spent the next couple of hours wandering around the now empty house which was now filled with new, happy memories of us together.

It was only a few hours until I would see her again, those would no doubt be the slowest hours of my life, but tonight we would be together once again.

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><p><strong>Authors Note:<strong>

I want to let you know I have set a firm posing schedule for the remainder of the chapters and this will be Wednesdays and Saturdays, so stand by your inboxes for lots to come. Pre-read as always by Leigh Warner.

Thanks to everyone who reviewed the last chapter.


	42. The Storm

**Disclaimer. I do not own Twilight or any of these characters. No copyright infringement is intended**

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><p>I was nervous at the thought of meeting Bella in the city, being around so many people, but knowing she would be there was enough to get me through. I dressed casually, a dark blue button down shirt and a pair of smart jeans. I wanted to surprise her, take her out for dinner after the book launch as I knew there was no way she would've eaten anything there.<p>

Once the cab dropped me off I walked to the florist and bought her flowers, not caring that she would likely tell me off for it, but the bouquet I'd chosen was huge. The woman who served me commented that the person getting them was a lucky lady, and I corrected her, telling her I was the lucky one. Truly, I was, after everything I'd put her through, somehow Bella still had it in her heart to love me. Why, I would never truly know, but I just felt blessed to have her still in my life.

Looking at my watch, I saw I had an hour before Bella would be done with the book launch, so I made my way into Millennium Park, which was just across the street to sit and enjoy the warmth of the afternoon sun. I soon found an empty bench to sit on, walking people as they went about their business. My cell rang, and when I pulled it out I frowned as I looked at the number, not recognizing it, so I let it go to voicemail. I thought it would be a marketing company trying to sell me something. I was shocked when immediately it rang again. Whoever it was clearly wanted to speak to me, putting the phone to my ear I answered,

"Hello?"

The voice that responded send chills through my body. "Hello Edward. Long time since we last spoke.

The words threatened to catch in my mouth. "Laurent. What do you want?"

He let out a low chuckle. "That's no way to greet me now is it? I called as I had to speak to you. I've been to your house, but it seems you were out of town. It's taken me a while to get your number." He let out a deep sigh. "Whatever Bella is doing, she needs to stop. Her actions have been noticed, when you start looking in places you shouldn't, people start to pay attention. The wrong people. The master, he knows what she is looking for, you have to stop her."

My blood ran cold. I hadn't realized Charlie was still looking for information, I thought when he drew blanks that was it, the subject was closed.

"What do you mean, he knows."

"All I can say, is that it has got back to him, and he is not impressed. I've heard talk of action. Nothing concrete. Master is furious, he is likely to lash out. Stop her, for all our sakes."

"I didn't know they were still looking. Does he mean to hurt her?"

"I don't know. He is volatile at the best of times. I wanted to warn you, give you a chance to stop this. Take Bella and get out of town. Tell your family to have security around them, or at the very least to be far more vigilant than they are normally. I think once he knows the digging has stopped your family will be safe, but here are no guarantees. I have to go we have an event tomorrow night, things are busy here. Get out of here before then as we will be nearby, it might be too much of a temptation for him not to look in on either of you. I will let you know if I hear more. Stay safe Edward."

With that, the line went dead.

I stared at the phone, unsure if I'd imagined what had just happened. Aro knew we were looking into Heidi and him. Shit! That would not end well.

My first call was to Emmett, telling him to get some of his guys over to my folk's place, and put people on Alice and Rose too. He didn't question anything, picking up on the slight panic in my voice. I told him I would get Bella and meet him at home. My plans for tonight were in ruins, but Bella's safety came first.

Getting to my feet I looked at my watch, there was still 45 minutes before the book launch was over, so for now she was safe. I would meet her outside the building, as soon as she came out, I would get her into a cab and back to my parents place while we worked out our next step.

I began to walk toward the Cultural Center thinking it would be best for me to wait for her there. Once I made it to the large, impressive building, I went to speak to the concierge, explaining who I was and that I was here to meet Ms Swan after the event. He refused to let me inside, saying it was a strict invitation only event. Just as I stepped back out onto the street to wait a figure brushed past me, he was dressed in the overalls of the electricity company, but something just seemed wrong about him. I turned around but couldn't see him. Maybe I was just being paranoid.

I paced the sidewalk, debating if I should call her and tell her I was waiting outside. Eventually, I decided to send her a text message. _'Waiting outside for you, I need to talk to you. X x '_

Once the message was sent all, I could was wait. I went to a street vendor to grab a coffee, knowing it would kill some time, only a few minutes, but it was better than nothing. I had just taken a sip of the scalding liquid when I heard my cell phone go off in my pocket. Pulling it out, I saw Laurent's number flash before me. As soon as I answered, he began to speak.

"James isn't here, he's gone. He told the others he had something to take care of downtown. I think he's gone after Bella." That made my blood run cold, my head spun around to look at the building across the street.

"Bella." The words came out in a whisper. I stared at the building, then I saw it. A plume of smoke was coming out of one of the windows. As I stepped forward the sound of a fire alarm began to blare and people rushed from the building. Without thinking I ended the call, desperately scrolling through my numbers, looking for hers as my feet carried me across the street.

The phone rang, with no answer, so I so I tried again, desperate to hear her voice. On the third attempt, she answered.

"Edward? I'm scared there's some kind of fire."

"I know baby, I'm outside, just stay calm, and I'll be waiting for you, I promise." I screwed my eyes shut, trying to keep myself together, but knowing this had to be James' handiwork. "You want to stay on the phone with me? I'm not going anywhere."

"Please, don't leave me." She sounded terrified.

"I would never leave you."

I could hear the sound of the fire alarm, both through Bella's phone and from where I was stood, the noise was almost deafening, I had to stay connected to her.

"I'm right out front baby, I'll see you the second you step out."

Her breathing was heavy as she made her way through the building, away from the danger, and towards me. How was I supposed to know that inadvertently she was heading straight toward an even more dangerous prospect.

I heard her gasp in surprise. "Bella, what's wrong baby? Are you okay?" I asked terrified of the answer.

"H-h-he's here." She whispered out.

"Who's there? Bella talk to me, please."

"The man from the bar, the one who nearly..." She couldn't finish the sentence. I knew who she meant. James.

Knowing that her safety relied on her being calm, I decided to lie to her, although it pained me to do so.

"He's not, your mind is playing tricks on you, making you see things. Just concentrate on getting outside, I'm here." I prayed he wasn't there, that she was imagining it. But deep down, I knew the truth. It had been James I'd walked past in the foyer. He'd somehow got inside and started the fire.

Fire trucks started to arrive, and they pushed the crowds back, ensuring that the masses of people coming out of the building could do so safely.

"Bella, stay with me, I'm still here. They made me move away, but I'm not leaving." I rushed out.

I could hear her breathing heavily. Then her scream pierced the air and my heart stopped for a second.

Bella? Bella! Then the line went dead.

In my panic, I called Emmett, not sure what he could do, but needing his reassurance.

"Emmett, something is wrong. I'm at the Cultural Center, there's a fire. Bella's inside, something is wrong I think James is here. I don't know what to do. I can't get inside. Help me, please?" The words came out in a jumble, I don't even remember drawing breath.

"Stay where you are, I'm just across town. I'll be there in 5 mins. Okay?"

"Thanks. I need to find Bella."

I ended the call, just knowing Emmett was on his way gave me some comfort. But could I afford to wait for him? What if it was too late. Instinct kicked in and my feet carried me to the edge of the fire department cordon, looking for a way through. Then I spotted it, there was a gap in the tape they'd put around the street lamps. All I needed was a split second to sneak inside. Fate must've been smiling on me as a woman staggered from the building coughing violently, distracting the fireman who was ensuring no-one breached the cordon. He rushed to her, calling for an EMT. That was all I needed, that split second to sneak through and rush toward the building and the woman I loved.

I heard the shouts of protest, telling me to stop, but I didn't listen my goal was singular, I had to find Bella.

Once inside I glanced around, there were still people making their way out. The center was large, and the old fashioned design of the building meant that there was just the one main exit. I glanced around, running down one of the corridors toward where I knew the room they had hired was. Turning a corner I found myself at the bottom of a large open staircase, thankfully there was very little smoke in this part of the building. As my foot made contact with the bottom step, I heard Bella's voice.

"Edward, please don't come any closer."

I looked up and saw her standing at the top of the staircase, her hands clawing at the arm that had her secured to a man. James. My blood ran cold, he had her, and there was nothing I could do to stop him.

"If you value her life, and yours I suggest you listen to what she says." He sneered turning his head to her and whispering something in her ear, causing her to flinch.

"Don't hurt her, please." I begged.

His head snapped to face me, then I saw clearly the knife he had in his free hand as he pointed it at me. "You don't get to tell me what to do Cullen." The knife then moved to Bella's throat. "Try anything and I'll slit her throat where she stands."

I held my hands up, showing my surrender to him. "Okay. What do you want?"

"Want? Why would I want anything from you!" He spat. "Now Bella here, she is a different story, you see we have unfinished business." He grinned at his comment, turning his head toward her and sniffing her skin. I could see the panic in her eyes. She began to cry.

"No, leave her alone. Your argument is with me isn't it James? You want to get revenge on me, leave her out of this." I was trying to buy some time, hoping the fire department would alert the Police to my entry into the building.

"True, but why shouldn't I get to have a little fun in the process." He sneered.

Bella struggled against him, but it was useless, he was far too strong for her. "Oh, I love it when they struggle, makes so much more fun." He laughed at his own sick joke.

What followed happened so quickly it was almost a blur. Bella went slack in his hold, then somehow she tried to wriggle free as he wasn't expecting this but still managed to keep hold of her. I shouted her name to tell her to be careful, but it was too late. There was a flash of silver, followed by a scream from Bella. I watched in horror as James released her, letting her tumble down the staircase toward me. It was like it happened in slow motion. Finally, she stopped at my feet, her body motionless, blood pouring from a large wound on her side. She struggled for breath and cried out in pain. I fell to my knees, cradling her in one arm as I attempted to stop the seemingly endless flow of blood from the wound with my free hand.

"Bella, it's okay. Stay with me, you'll be okay, I promise." I whispered in her ear. Then I was aware of James descending the stairs at a leisurely pace, the blood soaked knife in his hand. He crouched before us. Tilting his head to one side as he spoke in a low voice.

"An eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth. You took what was mine, so it only seems fair I take what's yours." With that, he dropped the knife into my lap. Just before he casually walked away laughing, he sneered in my ear. "You are mine Cullen, it's just a matter of time."

I picked the knife up and threw it away from us, wanting it nowhere near me. Bella's breathing was getting worse and I knew I needed to do something. Helplessly I called out for someone to come and help us, unsure if anyone would hear or even be left in the building.

"Bella, I need to go and find some help, you need medical attention. I'll be right back, I promise."

I moved to get to my feet, but Bella grabbed hold of my arm, whispering in a hoarse voice. "No! Stay, please."

"Okay, I'll stay. But you need help. I can't lose you, not now, not ever." I fought back the tears that filled my eyes. I needed to stay strong for her.

There was no way I refuse her. I knew she was badly injured, but the look on her face told me she didn't want me to leave her. All I could do was wait for help that might never come. Sobs filled the air as I cradled the body of the woman I loved, unable to do anything other than hold her as I tried desperately to staunch the flow of blood from her wound.

Her breathing became shallower as she struggled for each and every breath. The look in her eyes was one I would never forget, it was like a candle slowly being extinguished.

I heard footsteps getting closer and closer, finally someone was coming. I called out. "Help! Please, my girlfriend has been hurt."

A loud voice shouted. "Get on the ground, hands behind your head. Now!" I wanted to comply, but I couldn't, there was no way I could let go of Bella.

"No! You have to help her, please, she's been stabbed."

I was unceremoniously pulled away from her, orders to comply were barked at me. I fell to my knees, hands clasped together behind my head as I heard the frantic voices of the EMT's as they worked on trying to save Bella. Of course I gave them no resistance, they needed to help Bella. I would deal with their questions later, the important thing was she got the medical assistance she so desperately needed. Then an EMT crouched over her, the words spoken were a blur, I heard stab wound, barely breathing, shallow pulse, massive blood loss. All the time I was having questions fired at me about what happened.

"We're losing her."

Those three words sealed my fate and brought my world crashing down around my ears. I had lost everything.

Anger rose from deep inside me. James had done this, he had murdered her in front of me for no other reason than he could. Always knew he was a sadistic bastard, this just proved it. I heard them call for Police back up, talking of a suspect covered in blood who was being detained, They talked of how there was a weapon nearby. They surmised it was me who had stabbed her. I wanted to scream at them, tell them it wasn't me, that it was James. But he wasn't here, I was, My prints would be found on the knife, it was doubtful his would be, no he would be too smart for that. Plus, I was covered in her blood. All in all, my chances didn't look good.

A gurney was wheeled into move Bella to the hospital. I would take whatever punishment was due, I decided that this was my penance for all I had done wrong. But Bella didn't deserve this, she hadn't deserved any of this. I truly felt worthless. Then I made a split second decision, I had to find James, to kill him. I wanted to see the life drain from his face as he took his last breath. An eye for an eye indeed, only my vengeance would be real, unlike his.

Chancing a glance at the security guards, they were too busy watching what was happening with Bella to be concerned about me. Slowly I looked around and saw a sign on one of the doors that said 'maintenance only' that would be my escape route. With a quick glance over my shoulder, I whispered. "Forgive me, I love you." Before I got to my feet and made a move toward the door.

I didn't look back, I just keep going forward. I reached the door and opened it, only then did they notice my actions and shouted at me to stop, but it was too late. Slamming the door closed behind me, I was relieved to see there was a lock on the inside, which I secured and then pulled a large, heavy trolley to behind the door, this would buy me some precious time.

I looked around quickly seeing if there was anything I could use. I grabbed a pair of overalls and a baseball cap from the shelf behind me, they weren't ideal, but would cover my clothes and let me get out of here, hopefully unquestioned if I were stopped unlike a man who was covered in blood.

The maintenance room lead to a small passageway, hidden in the depths of the building, I followed it hoping there would be a way out. Then I saw it, a door that read 'loading bay.' Slowly opening the door, I looked around nervously, there was no one here. Pulling the baseball cap down over my eyes, I walked, slowly away from the building. My cell phone rang, it was Emmett.

"Where the fuck are you? I just saw Bella being brought out on a gurney." The panic was clear in his voice. "They said she wasn't breathing, what happened?"

"She's dead, and it's all my fault. I have to make this right, to end this. Forgive me."

I could hear Emmett screaming at me down the phone as I ended the call. Scrolling through the numbers I thankfully found a pen and piece of paper in the pocket of the overalls and wrote down the only number I would need on a piece of paper then I tossed the phone into a nearby dumpster. If the police were looking for me, they could use it to track me. I wasn't that stupid.

Sticking to back streets, I made my way across town, jumping every time I heard a siren, which in a city like this was often. I needed to blend in, fade into the background so no one would notice me. Deciding to head underground to the subway, I hopped onto the first train that arrived, not sure where I was going, and not really caring. The train car rumbled and flashed through various stations, all I knew was I needed to get away. I was barely paying attention until I saw a Police officer come into the carriage I was in. Before I could think, I was on my feet and running through the station and up onto the street. Slightly bewildered, I took in my new surrounding, not knowing where I had ended up. Just choosing left or right could be a decision that could change my life again, but I didn't care. As I made my way through the neighborhood, I felt the hackles on the back of my neck stand on end alerting me to possible danger. People were looking at me, I guessed they were assessing what I was doing here. This made me walk a little faster, until I came to an industrial area where a load of abandoned warehouses, no-one would look here. I needed time to get my thoughts together, to work out where I went from here and what I did next.

The inside of the warehouse was cold and damp, as night fell eerie shadows were cast across the floors, looking like the monsters I feared lived in my closet as a child the ones my mom promised me weren't real. Only now I knew the world as full of monsters, they were very real. Huddled in a corner, I sobbed, Bella was dead, even though it wasn't directly my doing, it was my fault, just as much as if I had driven a knife into her. Looking at my hands, even though it was long gone, I could make out the blood that still stained them, blood that would always be there and never leave. The blood of the woman I loved and had lost.

Closing my eyes was hard, Every time I did I saw her face as James plunged the knife into her, before pushing her toward me. Had there been anything I could have done to prevent that? In all honesty, I don't think there was. I knew he was a sadistic bastard and guess he would've done it anyway. His comment, an eye for an eye rang through my head. What did he mean? I hadn't done anything to him, other than wound his over inflated ego. It made no sense, but then again, a lot about this situation didn't. These were questions I would never have answered.

Exhaustion took me over and eventually I succumbed to sleep. Images of Bella and filled my fitful sleep, seeing her laughing and smiling at me before she faded away into the darkness. I found myself jolted awake by the sound by the sound of my own scream filling the air as the ache in my chest threatened to crack it wide open.

Somehow I had made it until dawn, but this new day wasn't going to change anything for me. I was still on the run, probably the prime suspect in the murder of the woman I loved. How anyone could think I would hurt her? She was my world, and now I was alone. I might as well be back in that cell in Volterra as be without her. I was nothing without her. I had no reason to continue anymore.

Making my way out of the warehouse, I had to walk several streets to find any sign of life, I needed to wash my face, attempt to clean myself up somehow while I worked out what I was going to do. I knew that, beneath the overalls, my shirt was now covered in her dried blood, I needed to get rid of it. At least I could pass for so done on their way to work this early. Wandering a few streets further, I saw a small, rundown diner. Heading inside I went straight to the bathroom where I used the toilet, and then set about cleaning myself up the best I could.

Red tear stained eyes met me when I looked in the mirror, the man staring back at me was a stranger to me, but I knew it was me. I splashed cold water on my face, hoping that would help, but knowing it probably wouldn't. The shirt was removed and put into the trash can. Making my way back into the diner I froze, there were two police officers at the counter collecting waiting for their order. I instinctively dropped my head, grateful for the baseball cap.

"What'll it be sugar?" A female voice asked demanding my attention.

I fished in my pocket, producing a $10 bill. "Large coffee to go please." Handing the note over I had thought, "Can you give me some change for a pay phone?"

She quirks a brow at me. "Pay phone? Wow, who uses those these days, I thought everyone had a cell."

"Yeah, it's broken, I dropped it. " I answered hoping that she wouldn't want more conversation than that. I just wanted to get my coffee, change and leave.

She turned away from me to ring up my total into the register and one of the cops turned toward me, we made eye contact for the briefest of moments before the waitress's voice interrupted.

"Hey, stop intimidating what customers I have." She leaned across the counter and playfully slapped the officer's arm, he smiled in response before leaning over the counter and placing a kiss on her lips.

"Just looking out for my girl." He teased. She just smiled at him before moving to me.

"Here ya go, coffee to go and change for a pay phone." She handed everything to me with a smile. I took it and walked toward to the exit pausing as my blood ran cold, the tv was on the local news, the reporter was saying about the suspicious fire at the Cultural Center yesterday, luckily there was no serious damage, but police wanted to talk to Edward Cullen in connection with an unprovoked attack on a woman. Police were not releasing any more details at this time. Staring at the screen, I was horrified at hearing my name and then my picture flashed up along with a number. The advice was not to approach me, but to contact law enforcement if I was seen. I had to get out of here. Now.

My instinct was right, as the waitress behind the counter let out a small gasp, I knew she'd recognized me. I pulled the door open without waiting to see what would happen next. Once outside I ran down the alley next to the diner. I swear I heard someone shout, "Stop!" but I didn't, instead I took off through more alleyways that crisscrossed each other. I didn't stop until I couldn't physically run anymore. That had been close, too close. Now my face was one people would be looking out for. It was only a matter of time before I was found, and I would do anything to avoid that.

I had no idea where I was only that I wouldn't come to this part of town by choice. Somehow it felt safe for me here, or so I hoped. My feet hurt from walking, I had to get off the streets. Knowing it would be best to wait until the cover of darkness to risk walking anymore. But where would I go? This really was hopeless. Walking down a deserted alley, I sat in a doorway, pulling my knees to my chest as I waited so I could make my next move.

Once night fell I stood up making my way out into the street where I looked around cautiously. No one paid any attention to me, I seemed to blend in. My stomach growled, reminding me, I hadn't eaten since the day before. Food had been the last thing on my mind. I had to eat. I had cash in my pocket, but still couldn't risk going to the store or diner. Thanks to my face being plastered all over the news, people would recognize me and even given the area, they might still call the Police as I was an outsider in these parts. They would protect their own, but possibly not a stranger. That was a risk I couldn't take.

Approaching a pay phone, I was surprised to find it worked. I fed it the necessary coins and punched the number in, listening as the phone rang at the other end. In my heart, I knew the Police would be ready to trace any calls I made to my family, but I had to speak to them.

"Hello?" The voice sounded unsure at first "Edward. Is that you? Please, sweetheart talk to me." I closed my eyes, fighting back to tears and emotions.

"Mom," Was all I could utter.

"Baby where are you? We've been so worried about you, what happened?"

There was the sound of commotion in the background and the phone was clearly taken from her hand.

"Son, you need to come home, now. Or hand yourself into the Police. Running away like this won't solve anything, it's only going to make things worse." Carlisle Cullen, ever the voice of reason.

"But I didn't do it, I didn't kill her! I couldn't hurt her when I love her so much." I choked out.

"Well, come home and we'll get this whole mess sorted out, you'll have the very best lawyers possible, I promise you that." His voice remained calm. He thought I'd killed her, my own father thought I could hurt the woman I loved.

Anger flared. "I didn't kill her, it wasn't me. Why don't you believe me?" I shouted. "I won't come back to be locked up again, I would rather die than have that happen."

"Edward, be reasonable-"

I didn't listen to anymore, slamming the receiver back into the cradle. Anger coursed through me, I knew going back wasn't an option, there was only one option left to me now. Quickly I picked up the receiver once again, deposited more coins and dialling the number I had written on a scrap of paper.

The phone was answered on the second ring. But they didn't speak; instead I made the first move.

"I need your help. Can you meet me?"

"Where are you?" Came the reply,

I"m on the corner of 63rd and Halstead. How quickly can you be here?"

There was silence before an exhaling of breath. "Twenty minutes. Stay out of sight." Then the line went dead.

This was going to be the longest twenty minutes of my life.

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><p><strong>Authors Note:<strong>

I know you will probably be ready to lynch me after you have read this. I planned on skipping the country and changing my name, but decided to stay put. I would love to hear your thoughts on this chapter, do please do hit the little button below.

Pre-read as always by Leigh Warner.

Thanks to everyone who reviewed the last chapter.


	43. Revenge Is A Dish

**Disclaimer. I do not own Twilight or any of these characters. No copyright infringement is intended**

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><p>Every car that passed made me more nervous, had I done the right thing? I had to trust someone in this whole mess, and who better than the person who had saved my life once before. A dark sedan pulled up to the curb, the window rolled down and a familiar voice called out to me.<p>

"Get in."

Once inside the car, I met by a steely stare of the man I had called to save me. Laurent.

I slouched down in the seat as we drove away. The silence hung heavy in the air between us. Laurent spoke first.

"Why did you call me?"

I let out a chuckle. "My life has gone to shit, Bella is dead."

Laurent turned his head to me. "What, how?"

"James did it, I saw him. Now the Police are hunting me for it. Who else could I call, Ghostbusters?"

The car came to an abrupt stop and Laurent turned to face me.

"Is this some joke to you? What the fuck Edward. You say James killed Bella, but left you alive. I find that hard to believe."

"I watched as he stabbed her, throwing her body to me like she was nothing. I guess he got interrupted as there was also the small matter of a fire at the Cultural Center to deal with." I turned to look out of the window. "You should ask him why he left me alive. I wish he'd killed me instead of her."

The car set off again. Laurent remained quiet as we made our way through the near deserted streets. Eventually, he pulled over. I looked at him like he was crazy, his response was simply to pull a gun out of his waistband and put it on the dashboard.

"No one will mess with me, I am well known around here." He looked out of the car windows as if making his point he raised his hand to a group of men that walked past us. "So. James killed Bella, well, I will admit I never saw him acting so quickly and publicly. Master certainly wasn't aware of this. James was missing yesterday afternoon, and I know he was angry as we couldn't locate him. He must've snuck out."

"You're telling me he didn't order this? Fuck that! I don't believe for a second that he had nothing to do with it." I shouted.

Laurent remained calm. "I am telling you, he didn't order it. James appears to have acted alone on this. So, why did you call me?"

I took a deep breath. "I'm wanted by the Police for her murder, James wasn't seen, my prints will be on the weapon. He left me with her body, set me up. I can't go home, the Police will arrest me and I will spend the god knows how many years rotting in a prison cell. I can't face it, not after what happened to me."

I watched Laurent intently, he was nodding his head in agreement as I spoke. I pushed on. "I could take that if I knew that the bastard was rotting in hell. I want revenge, I want to kill James for what he has done."

The relief at the words being out there was immense. Laurent turned to face me. "And how, pray tell me, do I fit this plan?"

"I want you to sneak me into Volterra, when I get a chance I will kill him. I want to look into his eyes as he draws his last breath, knowing it was at my hand. Revenge, pure and simple. Then I will take my chance, either Aro will kill me or the Police will arrest me. Either way I will have achieved my goal."

"And what do I get from this?" He asked a good question and I had no answer for him so I shrugged. "As I thought nothing other than the possibility I could lose my life for helping you for a second time. Last time I barely got away helping you, this time I will be risking so much more."

"I have nothing to offer you in return, and for that I am truly sorry. Forget I asked it was unfair of me." My hand went to open the car door, but he reached out and stopped me.

"I didn't say I wouldn't help you, only it would be foolish and nearly impossible to get you inside there." He thought for a moment. "You say you want to get to James?"

I nodded. "There is a fight tonight. It begins in a couple of hours. I will take you there, the rest is up to you."

"James. Will he be there?" I had to know.

"Of course, he is the main fighter tonight and has been looking forward to this." Laurent confirmed.

Laurent started driving again, "You cannot be seen, I will drop you a couple of blocks away, so you can make your way in, stick to the shadows. Some of the men there will have seen you before, they will know your face. There is a hoodie in the trunk, put that on it should help hide you."

He stopped at a red light. "Where have you been hiding out? This isn't a great part of town for someone like you."

"In an old warehouse. I ran when I realized Bella was gone, the Police were coming to arrest me. I didn't know what else to do. They all think I killed her, the Police, even my own family thinks I killed her."

His head snapped to me. "You spoke to your family? Did you say where you were hiding? What your plans were? This is important Edward."

"Of course I didn't. I used a pay phone to call, kept it short as I'm pretty sure they would be tracing the calls." My voice became barely a whisper. "My own father thinks I killed her. He thinks I am capable of that."

Right then my stomach growled, reminding me how long it had been since I last ate. Laurent set off when the light changed, asking me. "Have you eaten at all?"

I shook my head. Laurent turned the car around and we quickly pulled up outside a small diner. I panicked. "I can't go inside what if they recognize me from the news reports?"

"News reports? What news reports? Tell me, and leave nothing out." He demanded as we set off once again.

"I called into a diner this morning to use the bathroom and clean myself up, I got a coffee and while I was waiting there was a report on the news about the fire and incident yesterday. My picture and name were flashed on the screen, people are looking for me. The waitress, she recognized me. I panicked and ran, there were a couple of cops in there, I think they ran after me, but I didn't stop, I just got away."

"Where was this?" His tone was clipped.

"About five blocks from where you picked me up."

He let out a deep groan muttering under his breath.

I let out a sigh. "I'm sorry. I didn't know what to do, where to go so I stayed in the area. I guessed they would expect me to run, leave and would be ready for that. I mean, what idiot stays right under their noses?"

Laurent chuckled darkly. "You have a good point there. The neighborhood your were in is dangerous. There is no way the police would look too hard for you around there."

We pulled into the parking lot of a McDonald's, heading for a drive thru Lane. I looked at Laurent surprised as he placed an order before calmly pulling up to the various windows. He thrust the brown, paper filled bag at me speaking only one word. "Eat."

After I devoured the contents of the bag, I thanked him, asking why he was helping me like this.

"I already told you, I like you. James had no right to hurt Bella like that. His anger and should have been directed at you, she was an innocent." He looked thoughtful. "I can try and leave a weapon under the seat of my car, just in case things get out of hand with James. You will need to be quick when you take him on, no weapons unless absolutely necessary. They only draw attention, and that is the last thing you need. I cannot help you anymore than that, if you are discovered, then I cannot help you. Master will be furious, his wrath may be swift, so you might just get to join Bella sooner than you think."

Once again, the car slowed down, finally stopping on the edge of some wasteland. Immediately I recognized it as the place I had first fought, that memory was burned in my brain forever.

"We are here. I can see you recognize the place, people will be arriving shortly. Stay out of sight, if they see you, it will be over before it begins." He got out of the car and I followed. He opened the trunk, handing me the hoodie he had talked about earlier. "Good luck Edward. I hope not to see you later, or ever again."

I opened my mouth to speak, but was silenced by his cellphone ringing, he raised his index finger, indicating I should be silent.

"Yes Felix?"

"No, I am just about to get there."

I had some business to attend to first," he smiled at me. "No, this is not your concern. Yes, everything will be ready in good time. Have I ever let you down? I understand. See you soon."

The call ended, and he turned to me. "You need to go, Felix is almost here and is not happy I disappeared when I should have been preparing to come here with them. He will likely take his anger at my disobedience out on our newest acquisition. Pity, he showed such potential once he got over his initial disobedience."

My blood ran cold, they had someone new in their grasp? I pitied the man, knowing what he would have gone through. But I couldn't let thoughts of him cloud my mind, my task tonight was singular, James had to die.

I could only watch as Laurent's car pulled away. All I had to do was bide my time and by the end of tonight, James would be dead. Are too, if I could pull it off. Both of them had put me through a living hell for months, and now just when I thought my life was back on track, they had to fuck it all up.

Pulling the hood over my head, I adopted a slouch, hunching my shoulders up as I tried to blend in. The wasteland was huge, I found myself staring through the fence, watching as more and more people arrived. Soon it would be time to strike, I had to be ready.

Making my way along the fence, looking for a way in, without going through the main gate. I was about to give up, when I found what I needed, a hole in the fence. Squeezing through the gap, I looked around and saw that no one had noticed me. I could see the crowd assembled, and then the tell tale signs of Aro's men. They remained separate from the main body of the event, Laurent's car was parked on the perimeter.

More and more people arrived, tonight looked to be a busy night, so I should be able to blend into the crowd quite easily while I waited for my moment to strike. There was a fight already in progress as what the format from what I remembered. The lower earning, less important fights would take place as a warm up to the main event. From what Laurent told me, that would be James. Keeping my head down I pushed my way through the crowd, always moving, never making eye contact with anyone.

I was getting closer and closer to the area where I knew James would be warming up. Several men I recognized moved through the crowd, nothing seemed to be wrong, or out of place so I continued toward my goal. Then I saw him, he still had his sweatshirt on, he practiced his punches as he shadowboxed completely unaware of my presence. I made my way to Laurent's car, moving slowly but with confidence, if anyone saw me they wouldn't think anything was out of the ordinary. Opening the drivers door I felt under the seat, cold, hard metal made contact with my hand. Just as he had promised, there was a weapon waiting for me. I slid it into the waistband of my jeans, covering it with the hoodie, ready for when I needed it. The keys were in the ignition, maybe it was an oversight, maybe it was Laurent's way of giving me an escape route if needed. Right now I couldn't think that far ahead, I needed to deal with James first.

Moving away from the car, preparing to pounce I heard a voice call out.

"Hey! What are you doing back here?" A hand grabbed hold of my shoulder, instinctively I spun around and my fist connected with the man's jaw, sending him sprawling to the ground. There was no way I could allow this to blow my cover, so I punched him repeatedly until his face was covered in blood and he was unconscious. Moving his body was hard, but needed to be done. I deposited him behind the row of parked cars, knowing by the time he came around, I would either be long gone, or dead. Hopefully, not the latter.

Taking a deep breath, I turned around only to come face to face with James. The sneer on his face grew as he greeted me. "Hello Cullen, fancy seeing you here."

This was not what I expected, this wasn't how it was meant to happen.

He stared at me as if he expected me to speak, but what could I say to him? "Oh hi, thanks for stabbing my girlfriend, and leaving me to carry the blame."

"What's wrong Cullen, nothing to say to me? Funny, I thought you would be talkative, considering the last time we met." He stepped closer to me, forcing me to take steps backward. Suddenly I found myself backed up against the van. I was trapped, this was not good.

From out of nowhere I found the strength to push him backwards, he clearly wasn't expecting this and stumbled.

"Why?" I asked. "Why did you do it?"

He laughed. "Well, mainly because I could, you made it too easy for me, although I must admit when you skipped town and she followed I thought I would be out of luck. Then when I called her office to arrange a meeting to discuss some magazine coverage for her new author, they were very forthcoming about her plans, and the book launch. Of course, it was only an added bonus that you were there to witness it. Although I had hoped to have more alone time with her. Your arrival only meant that I had to forgo that pleasure, and skipped straight to the part where I killed her."

"You bastard!" My anger took over and I punched him again and again. He laughed at me.

"C'mon Cullen, I thought we taught you better than this. You hit like a girl. Maybe you need to come back and have some more lessons with me."

We circled each other, both of us looking for a weakness in the other. He lunged forward, tackling me around the waist and knocking me to the ground. I tried my hardest to protect myself, but it was no use. James gained the upper hand, he managed to get a few blows in.

"I thought you would fight back more than this Cullen, I mean you have nothing to live for now I killed the woman you loved."

Fury burned white hot inside me, and it was like someone flicked a switch. I attacked him, pushing him away from me, getting some low blows in, each one hit their mark. Eventually, I had regained control and without thinking I reached for the knife in the waistband of my jeans and plunged the knife into him. I had no idea if I had found my target, but he stared at me, backing away as his eyes went wide and he fell to his knees in front of me. His hand grasped where the blade had pierced him. Eventually, he slumped to the ground before me. I was done, James was dead.

Turning to make my escape I ran back toward Laurent's car, knowing it would be the fastest way out of here. Once I was sat behind the wheel I fumbled for the key in the ignition, it was gone. Desperation tore through me, it had been there. I searched for it, hoping maybe it had fallen into the footwell, but I came up blank. Frustration took over and with a scream I hit the steering wheel with both hands. Then I heard a noise at the side of me before I felt the cold metal of a gun muzzle pressing against my temple. Taking a moment to glance to the side, I saw Felix holding the gun, right next to him was Laurent.

Felix looked over to where the motionless body of James lay before he looked back at me. It was useless, he was going to kill me that much was clear, but did that really matter now? I managed to hold my hands up in surrender, showing him I wasn't going to fight him. Maybe he would show me some mercy when he ended my life. Not that it mattered any more, I had nothing left to fight for. Bella was gone, James was dead, and I had been betrayed by the only person I had trusted.

The last thing I saw was the butt of the gun as it rushed toward me, then there was nothing, only darkness.

* * *

><p><strong>Authors Note:<strong>

Still with me? This was going to be two chapters, but I decided to put them together as they seemed to fit.

Milestone for Taken this week – it hit 500 reviews WAHOO, the 500th reviewer was Vero11 who is anxiously waiting for this chapter to post.

I got a few people asking me if Bella was really dead, did I kill her? Well, I shall not say either way, other than what I write has to fit the story.

Pre-read as always by Leigh Warner. Thanks for holding my hand!

See you all on Saturday when things will get really interesting ;-)


	44. Hell Revisted

**Disclaimer. I do not own Twilight or any of these characters. No copyright infringement is intended**

* * *

><p>I watched in awe as Bella walked toward me, the sway of her hips the smile that played so beautifully on her lips. The dress was stunning, ivory satin that clung to her every curve. A bouquet of Lillies in her hand as she took painstakingly slow steps towards me. As she reached me, turning toward me, I smiled at her, but her face suddenly contorted in pain. The flowers dropped to the floor as she clutched her stomach, my eyes fell to the place they grasped. The satin became soaked in blood as she gasped. "This is your fault."<p>

I looked down at my hands, horrified as they were covered in blood, a knife was in my hand.

"You killed me Edward." Were the last words I heard her speak before she fell to the ground.

I screamed and tried to open my eyes, but they were heavy. My body wouldn't react as I wanted it to. It hurt every last inch of me radiated with pain that I couldn't begin to describe or understand. I had no idea where I was, nor did I care. Right now I was in a world where I didn't have to think, to feel. Other than the pain of seeing Bella dying in front of me, that I wished to erase, forever.

A voice cut through the confusion I couldn't' make my way through, they sounded as if they were underwater.

"He's coming round. Put him under again, this time increase the dose."

I struggled, not wanting to go back to the place I just escaped from. A place where I watched Bella die before me and I was powerless to stop it.

Another voice filtered through. "Are you sure? He's had so much of it, there's a chance he might OD." I recognized the voice, but couldn't quite place it in my hazy state,

"If he does, he does. No real loss anyway." The first voice chuckled.

A voice spoke softly in my ear. "I'm truly sorry Edward, there was no other way."

"Laurent?" The name somehow managed to fall from my lips in recognition.

My skin began to tingle as they took hold of it, then there was a familiar sharp scratch followed by the intense feeling of calm which washed through me. No answer came to my question, only the sound of footsteps retreating. With no other choice, I gave into the drug as I relaxed once again, submitting to the darkness that surrounded me, surrendering to a reality that was created for me to inhabit.

Euphoria began to take me over, my body reacting to the artificial stimulant that flooded my bloodstream, dragging me back into the world I longed to be free of only this time I saw Bella and she was alive, but for how long?

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

Gasping for air, I felt cold, so very cold as I shivered. Then another bucket of ice cold water was thrown over me. Desperate to get free of the restraints my body reacted violently to the stimulant. A low chuckle sounded from my right.

"Seems sleeping beauty is finally awake. You must've given him too much, you imbecile, you could've killed him." The voice was angry, I remembered being on the receiving end of some of that anger. "He's no use to us dead, you know that."

I couldn't see anything, there was something obscuring my vision. A fact confirmed when a hood was ripped off my head and I struggled to focus on the faces before me, even in the poor light of the dungeon I was locked in.

"Mr. Cullen, how nice of you to join us once again. I have missed seeing your happy, smiling face around here." Felix sneered in my face.

"Fuck you!" Was my response.

I never saw his hand coming toward me. The back of it struck my face, causing it to whip to the side. I could feel the blood begin to pool in my mouth, and without thinking I spat it at him.

Felix's anger spiked as he grabbed me by the throat. All I could do was laugh at him, I welcomed death after everything I had been through, even if it was at his hands.

"I could kill you here and now Cullen, it would be so easy. I'd simply blame your death on an overdose, and these goons would take the fall." He let go and I gasped for breath. "But I won't. There is so much in store for you, now you are back in our care. Master will be keen to see you now that you are now conscious again."

My throat was sore and I struggled to speak, but I managed to croak out. "Just kill me. I have nothing left to live for."

Felix stared at me. "Oh, but you do Mr. Cullen, we have plans for you. It would be such a shame for you to miss out on all the fun."

With that, he turned and left. Leaving me alone with my thoughts was a form of torture. I was sure I would never end up back here. I would rather have died knowing Bella was dead than live another moment without her in my life than end up back here in this hellhole.

Now I was able to think straight, despite the fact I was freezing cold and shivering. I began to piece together just how I had ended back here. Had my escape and the weeks that followed all been a dream? Maybe I had been drugged, kept down here, never having found my freedom and my way back to Bella only to have it all snatched so cruelly away from me. Could my mind be so twisted as to play the ultimate dirty trick on me? Deep down I knew the answer, no it couldn't. Everything was real, it happened.

Then memories came flooding back to me, finding my way home to Bella, my confession, Bella and I separating, finding our way back to each other only for her to be attacked by James. Forcing me to go on the run after being found with the murder weapon crouched over her as the life ebbed from her body. Right down to the fight with James on the wasteland. The feeling of euphoria I felt as I drove a knife into him, as he had done to Bella. Staring down at his body as he lay dying on the ground. The sound of people approaching, me running to Laurent's car to make my escape, but as I desperately searched for the key, my panic as I couldn't find it, down to hearing Laurent's voice next to me, followed by pain and then nothing I could believe to be real until I became conscious a few minutes ago, back in the dungeons of Volterra.

A desperate scream came from deep inside me. Laurent had betrayed me, set me up and returned me to the clutches of his master. How had I been so foolish, so blind as to not see he could do this. He'd told me himself, his own life would be forfeit if his involvement in my escape were uncovered. Maybe this was his way of balancing the books, but it was still a cowardly thing to do.

The only joy I could take from the situation was that James was dead. Hopefully, he would rot in hell for eternity for what he had done. For me, it was only a matter of time before I joined him.

I heard more footsteps approach and my eyes struggled to focus on the figure as it passed the doorway of my cell. They were half hidden by the shadows, using this to their full advantage they stared at me.

"Who's there?" I called out, every hair on my body standing on edge at their mere presence.

The figure took a step forward, some light being cast onto them. I stared in a mixture of horror and amazement as realization dawned on me.

"Hello again Cullen, fancy seeing you here." They mocked.

"James! B-b-but you're… You're dead. I killed you." I stammered out.

The ghost walked closer to me, smiling the whole time. This had to be a side effect of the drugs, he couldn't be real. I felt his hand grab my face as he spoke, so close I could feel his breath on my face.

"No, you didn't. Nice try though Cullen. Better luck next time. Not that there will be one of course." He sneered before he released me. "I honestly never saw it coming, I thought you would have run to the Police, telling them it wasn't you, hoping that they would believe your fantasy story about a madman who wanted revenge on you. But then again, you would have to explain who I was, and seeing as you never went to the Police on your escape, they would have locked you up for such a fantasy story. At least you had the foresight to keep your mouth shut. But if you had told them, then maybe you wouldn't be here once again."

He turned away from me.

"How? I don't understand, I stabbed you." I uttered.

"Yes you did, and a damn fine job you made of it too, another couple of inches lower and it might've been a different story. You see, I knew you were coming for me, I was prepared." A smile broke out on his face as he stared right into my soul. "I was wearing a stab vest, although it protected me from the majority of the impact, you still had enough force to do this." He lifted his shirt and showed me a small wound on the side of his ribs.

"How did you know?" I whispered, already knowing the answer but needing to hear it confirmed.

"Laurent warned me. You thought he was your friend, an ally. What a fool you were. He sold you out, allowing us to bring you back while all the time you thought you had the upper hand, when it was us in control. He is one of us, his loyalty is to our Master, no-one else."

I tried not to let my emotions show at this news. "I wish I had killed you for what you did to Bella, she's dead because of you." I hissed.

Suddenly he was back in my face. "Bella? You think you are the only one to have lost someone? An eye for a fucking eye Cullen. You should count yourself lucky her death was quick. I doubt Heidi's was." He stopped talking, aware he had let something slip that he shouldn't have.

"Heidi? What does she have to do with anything?"

"Everything. I might as well tell you, seeing as before long you will be dead. You caused her death, the only person I fucking cared for, that I loved and because of you she and my baby were taken away from me."

I was shocked."What? Heidi was Aro's girlfriend. We had sex and got pregnant that's the reason I was brought here, the baby was mine."

A punch to my stomach winded me, it hurt like hell. He followed it up with a second and then a third.

"No!" He roared in pure anger. "She was with me, the baby was mine. We had it all planned out, how we could leave here and never look back. I was one fight away from having enough money. Then he found out about it and she lied, not knowing what it would unleash. So now you see why Bella had to die."

I had no words, not that I was capable of speech. His confession shocked me to the core. All this heartache and blood on my hands over a baby that was never been mine to begin with. I could only watch as he walked out of the cell, leaving me alone once again.

-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-

Time passed with no way of marking it. I was left alone on for the most part. Faceless people came to let me down from the restraints above me only to chain me to the wall. Last time I was here at least I had a bed of sorts, now I was relegated to the hard, cold stone floor. Sleep was erratic, spending much of my time jumping at the slightest sound, afraid the next person to enter the cell may be the last face I saw the one would end my misery or prolong it.

I'd expected Aro to visit me, to show his dominance over me and clear satisfaction that despite my initial escape, I had found myself in his control, but he didn't. I guessed three days had passed since I was brought back to my senses by Felix, but I could only guess. Working this out from the meager meals that were given to me.

My life was over, that much I did know. There would only be one way out of here for me, it was purely a matter of time.

Huddled in the corner of the cell I was fighting to stay awake, something felt wrong. I'd heard footsteps earlier and the sounds of something being dragged along for ground. I thought they had come for me. I was not to be that lucky. My eyes burned with tiredness, my body ached from the position I was in, eventually I gave in to the exhaustion and managed to sleep, this time there were no images of Bella, no blood. It was as if my subconscious was too exhausted to conjure images to torture me with.

I was jolted from my slumber by the sound of several pairs of footsteps getting closer and closer. Despite my exhausted state, I found it was always best to stay aware of my surroundings at all times. I retreated further into the corner, hoping they wouldn't see me, but who was I kidding. Where else would I have gone? My eyes were fixed on the doorway, I could only watch as Felix stepped inside and walked over to me. He reached down and grabbed hold of me, pulling me to my feet. There was no point in resisting, he was far too strong. Once again my arms were secured above my head before Felix stood at my side. Seconds later Aro stepped inside, a smile on his face, but this was not one of pleasure, this was one that reminded me of how sinister and ruthless he was.

"Mr. Cullen, so nice to see that you have returned to us safe and sound. I must admit, I was so terribly disappointed when I thought you had died following the fight." He paused briefly, the smile vanished from his face. "I don't like being lied to, and yet I was deceived by some of those closest to me, those that I trusted. But the wonderful news is that you have returned to me, to continue where you left off. But first, I understand James here has a score to settle with you for the injuries you inflicted on him before your capture." He turned and motioned for James to step forward. I pulled against the restraints.

"What about what he's done to me?" I screamed.

"You blew it." James sneered. "You should've taken me out when you had the chance."

"No! Please? Hasn't he done enough to me? He-" I never got to finish as a couple of swift blows were delivered to my already aching stomach.

James motioned to another man. "Gag him, I really have had enough of hearing his whining for now. The only sounds I want to hear from him is when my fists connect with his body, and his bones crack. Oh, and maybe the muffled screams as he begs for mercy."

"Now, now James. Don't hurt him too badly, we need him to be able to attend a special night we have lined up." Aro patted James on the back almost in a fatherly way. "Have fun." With those final words, he left us alone.

A gag was quickly fixed around my mouth, leaving me no ability to speak, but it certainly didn't stop me screaming and muttering expletives as each blow hit harder than the last. Tears began to stream down face as I couldn't endure the pain anymore. I was like a human punchbag, and I'd no idea how James could land so many blows in succession without tiring himself.

Eventually, he stopped, turning and walking away from me. I was let down and collapsed to my knees, the gag was removed and I gasped desperately for breath before I passed out from the sheer pain.

-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-

More cold water brought me back to consciousness, my eyes opened and I saw James standing over me, his head cocked to one side as he watched me as I struggled to get onto my knees. It was strange how I automatically fell back into this routine without being told to. James chuckled as he towered over me. "Nice to see you know your place Cullen."

My entire body ached and throbbed from the pain he'd inflicted on me, but there was no use in complaining. "Why did you not just kill me?" I asked. "You would've done me a favor, and saved yourselves a load of trouble. People will be looking for me, they know about what happened before. They will find me, I know they will."

James laughed, stepping aside as Aro stepped inside. "Oh, will they now. Do you really think people care about you? Your family couldn't care less if you were alive or dead right now, they have other more pressing matters occupying their minds. They appear to be struggling with something they deem more important, it's left them distracted."

My eyes went wide as I uttered. "Bella."

"Yes, it would appear that she has had some form of accident." He smiled as he said the words. "Now that you are here, we are going to continue from where we left off. You are to continue to pay for what you did previously. Your debt is far from being repaid."

"Please, just let me die, I'm sure that killing me will bring you more pleasure than watching me go through the motions, waiting to find a moment when someone will unwittingly end my life." I fixed him with a steely stare as he appeared to consider my proposal.

"No. I want to see you fight, and trust me when I say you will fight, and obey me." His tone was tinged with anger as he continued. "Your life is not yours to end, it is mine. Once again you will do as you are told."

"But you have nothing to hold over me anymore, Bella is gone. My family don't care if I am alive or dead."

Aro paused for a moment. "This is true, but you still care about them even if they have abandoned you. There is nothing to stop me hurting them to get you to obey."

I decided to try and bluff my way out of this. "If they don't care about me, why should I care about them. The people I loved turned their backs on me, so why should I care." I took a deep breath and told the ultimate lie. "They are nothing to me anymore. I don't have to do anything you say. Just kill me and get it over with."

Aro nodded slowly. "A man who has nothing to lose is a dangerous thing."

He began to pace the floor, deep in thought before he spoke once again."Edward when will you learn that I'm the boss and I control what you do and when you die? Do you really think I will allow you to dictate terms to me? What would you do if I had something you professed to no longer care for. Something that might test that theory that you no longer care about anyone. If you don't care, I can dispose of them. If you are lying to me, then we shall soon see." He turned away from me. "James, bring in the insurance."

My brain began to whir, what did he mean. What was this 'insurance'? Who could they have here that would force my hand in such a way. I watched as a hooded figure was dragged into the room and pushed to their knees before me. A gun placed to their head. As the hood was ripped away, I let out a gasp of surprise, unable to keep in inside. It was Carlisle.

* * *

><p><strong>Authors Note:<strong>

I hope you are not grabbing your pitchforks just yet. You have the wonderful Leigh to thank for Carlisle ending up in Volterra, that was totally her idea I just ran with it.

Pre-read as always by Leigh Warner. Thanks for holding my hand!

See you all on Wednesday when more will be revealed.


	45. Fight Night Revisted

**Disclaimer. I do not own Twilight or any of these characters. No copyright infringement is intended**

* * *

><p>I was speechless. Carlisle was a matter of feet from me, with a gun pointed to his head. He looked confused at his surroundings.<p>

"Edward!" He exclaimed in surprise once his eyes settled on me. "Where are we? What's happening?"

Aro stepped in front of him. "I ask the questions here, not you." He hit Carlisle across the face. Much to my amazement there was no reaction from him. But from the look of his face, this was not the first blow he had received.

"Now Edward you have two choices. Fight me and your father will take your place or do as we say, and I might let him live."

Aro paced back and forth between us as my mind raced, frantically I tried to take it all in. James chuckled darkly and I wanted nothing more than to kill him with my bare hands.

The silence was that hung heavily in the room was broken when Aro stopped in front of me. Turning to face me. "So Edward, have you made a choice? Live and fight for me as previously, or die and allow your father to take your place. Somehow, I don't think he is cut out for this lifestyle, and wouldn't last long. Of course it would give me great pleasure to have his broken body delivered back to your mother. I might even send to her in once piece."

"No!" Carlisle roared. "You can't as my son to make such a sacrifice or decision. Has he not suffered enough at your hands you bastard! You've taken so much from him already. Let him be free and keep me instead."

My heart almost stopped beating as I saw James pull the gun back and strike him on the back of the head, causing him to fall to the ground. I moved to his side, he looked at me, pain clear on his face.

Then I felt hands pulling me away, he was also put back on his knees, the gun placed once again to his head.

"Your choice Cullen, either you or him. Decide now, or I will make the decision for you." Aro stared at me, not a glimmer of emotion in his cold, dead eyes.

"Okay, I will do as you say." The words were barely a whisper.

A look of pain and confusion crossed my fathers face as he said. "No son."

My voice grew louder. "I'm yours, I will stay."

Aro clapped his hands like an excited child, turning to James. "Take Mr Cullen senior back to his accommodation. See that he gives you no trouble."

Carlisle was dragged away, and all I could do was watch him leave. "I thought you said he would be free if I stayed?" I was confused.

"No, you assumed he would be free. Me? I made no such promises. He is my insurance policy, for now."

Aro turned to walk out of the cell, pausing in the doorway. "You need to prepare for a fight tonight. You have six hours to pull yourself together. Tonight I will show your precious father how pathetic you are, how you dance to the tune I play, how I command your every move. You are nothing by my puppet to do as I wish with. Your will is not your own any longer, and neither is your life."

I watched as he walked out of the cell, leaving me alone once again. Every word he had said was true, I was nothing, no one anymore. My life was not worth living. If only I could find a way to end it and ensure my families safety I would happily do it, they were better off without me.

After being alone with my thoughts for too long, I was taken for a shower before tonights event. My body hurt, but I knew this wouldn't stop them. I would still be expected to fight regardless, the only question was how long did I follow orders for? Could I really consider let my own father taken my place in this hell hole? Deep down I knew the answer to this was no. This had been my mess, my fuck up and now I would have to pay the price. I would find a way to ensure my family's safety, whatever it took I would happily do it. I knew they were better off without me, this would be my parting gift to them.

The earlier revelation about Heidi played heavily on my mind. I was angry that I had taken the blame for a baby that wasn't mine. I'd been so shocked when James admitted it was his, combined with the fact he and Heidi were lovers, looking to escape and I had been used. If I could go back in time to that night, I would. Hindsight is a wonderful thing though, but knowing how that one decision not to stay and talk to Bella had caused such a ripple effect in all our lives was shocking. Had I stayed, I wouldn't have got drunk, met Heidi and slept with her. One night truly had fucked everything up, forever. Bella would still be alive had I stayed to talk to her instead of acting like a total asshole. Her blood was on my hands, and they would never be clean again.

I was pulled from my thoughts and taken for a shower, shortly afterwards I was collected and once again restrained, a hood placed over my head before I was taken outside and into a waiting van. I gave no resistance, as frankly there was no point. I was a broken man.

When we arrived at the venue it seemed quieter than I remembered from previous fights, but I guessed maybe we were early and the spectators would arrive later. I allowed them to lead me into a room where they left me alone, closing and locking the door behind them. I slumped to the ground, leaving the hood in place as it would hide from view the tears that were now staining my cheeks. Was my father safe? Would they let him go once they were sure of my obedience. The one thing I knew was, I would obey their every command until I was sure he was safe, then all bets were off.

The door was unlocked and I heard someone step inside, but they didn't speak to me. My senses were on high alert, was this James coming to finish me off? Would he risk doing that here though? I guessed not.

I was pulled to my feet, the cuffs removed and the hood yanked from my head. My eyes strained to adjust just to the light in the room, when they did before me stood a man I wanted to kill with my bare hands. Laurent.

Anger and white hot rage rushed through me. "You fucking bastard!" I rushed at him, my fist making contact with his jaw, sending him falling backwards. He soon recovered though, "I'm going to kill you!"

He showed no emotion on his face as he easily ducked out of the way of my second attack, I was fuelled by pure anger and emotion, not thinking or putting any thought into what I was doing. Of course, this gave him the upper hand. He easily blocked some of my blows, allowing others to land, but he never once hit me in return.

Then, out of nowhere I was brought to my knees in immense pain. God, I had forgotten how much that belt hurt. As I writhed on the ground in agony, he knelt down next to me finally speaking for the first time.

"I know you hate me right now, and I understand. If I were you, I would feel the same. But killing me will achieve nothing, other than prolong this situation."

"You set me up you motherfucker! What do you think I will feel toward you?" I spat through gulps of air as I tried to regain control. "You should've just killed me yourself."

"No! That was never an option Edward, everything I have done is for a reason, every action has a purpose."

"Yeah, like saving your own neck."

"See it that way, but I assure you one day soon, you will realize I am on your side."

"I'm back here, because of you! They told me you set me up to be captured, James had a fucking stab vest on. I wanted him dead, yet thanks to you he is very much alive, And I am here yet again, as is my father." The last words stuck in my throat, I fought to regain control.

"I will kill you for this. Mark my words Laurent, one day, I will be free and I will take great delight in ending your life. There will be no second chance, I won't fail and you will never see it coming."

He went to answer, but was stopped by the door being opened by Felix, who was flanked by James.

"Ah, I see you have already come to get our prize fighter ready Laurent, I guess he gave you no problems?" Felix stared at me laying on the ground. "Or at least nothing some obedience training couldn't resolve." He smirked as Laurent handed him the small remote that worked my belt.

"I had to remind him of his place, but other than that, nothing I couldn't handle." Laurent's voice remained calm.

"On your feet Cullen." Felix barked. "It's time."

Slowly I got to my feet, and didn't flinch as they recuffed my hands. Laurent did this quickly, trying to make eye contact with me, but I refused to meet his stare. Instead, as he moved to my side acting as my escort from the room, as he did so he whispered in my ear. "Trust me." I pulled away from him, standing still while staring at him like he was crazy. How could he ask me to trust him, when the last time I did, I ended up back here. Felix and James turned to see what had happened as Laurent struggled to get me to move again.

"Move Cullen!" Felix barked. When I refused, James took Laurents place, grasping my arm, tightly and forcing me forward. I didn't resist.

We were in a large warehouse, and it struck me as unusual there were so few people here. Normally fights have been well attended, but this one seemed to have around 40 men all stood in a circle, nothing like the hundreds of attendees I had seen previously. As if he sensed my confusion Felix spoke. "Tonight is a small, intimate gathering. Specially selected guests, hand picked by our master to watch this very special event."

As we made our way toward the circle my heartbeat began to race, I was scared. They had said my father would be watching, this was the last thing I wanted him to see. Me fighting for my life like some savage. I quickly scanned the crowd I couldn't see him anywhere, maybe Aro had changed his mind. I could only hope. Once we made it through the crowd, I was led to Aro and stood before him. He was sitting on a chair, flanked on either side by his guards. When he saw me a smile broke out on his face and he stood.

"Kneel." Was the instruction that came from Felix, I hesitated for a brief moment, and James hit the back of my knees, forcing me into a kneeling position. Aro chuckled, obviously finding this amusing.

"Gentlemen." Aro's addressed the crowd. "Tonight, is a very special night as I am sure you are all aware. You are a group of specially invited guests, hand picked by me. Not only have I been returned something I thought lost to me, I have another fighter for you to delight over. This one is new, but shows incredible strength of spirit and the urge to live above all else." He paused, and I could hear the murmuring of the crowd. "These two men will fight like never before, this will be a true battle of wills, for not only are they fighting for honor, they will be fighting for their lives. Tonight it is simple, kill or be killed."

My kind raced as I tried to take in what he had said. There was the sound of shuffling feet behind me and then to my right a man was forced to his knees. His hands were bound behind his back while he remained hooded, this was clearly my opponent for the evening, the man I would fight for my life. I had to win, otherwise my father would be forced into my place. This was not the time for conscience my choice was simple. This man had to die.

We were both pulled to our feet and stood about 10 feet apart in the center of the circle. James stood behind my opponent, Felix next to me.

Aro spoke once again. "There are a couple of new rules this evening. I will allow them a weapon each." Two knives were dropped between us. "And the winner is the one left breathing at the end. This is a true fight to the death."

A loud cheer erupted from the assembled crowd. Internally, I was judging how quickly I could make it to the knives. Another mans blood would be on my hands before tonight was through, but this was necessary to protect all I held dear.

The cuffs were removed from us both and I flexed my wrists, getting the circulation back into them. "Meet your opponent!" Aro shouted.

James smiled as he pulled the hood from the mans head. My world stopped, it was Carlisle.

His eyes were wide with terror as he met my stare, realizing he would be fighting me, his own son and one of us would die here tonight.

"No!" I roared out, trying to turn and face Aro, but once again, I was brought to my knees in pain.

Felix leaned over me, "Yes Cullen, you will fight your own father, Maybe you will even kill him, or perhaps he will kill you."

I heard my name being shouted by Carlisle before he was silenced. Glancing toward him, I saw James had him in a stranglehold, but still he struggled to get free. Felix held my arms behind my back, pulling me to my feet in the process.

Aro spoke once again. "Maybe I should have clarified. Tonight, we have a father and son fight. Will the father be able to kill his own flesh and blood? Will the son be able to drive a knife into the man responsible for giving him life, therefore ending his? The outcome is clear. Only one of these two men will leave here alive."

"I won't kill my own father!" I screamed. "You can't make me."

Aro walked over to me, sneering in my ear. "Oh, but I can Edward. You see there is no choice here, either you fight him and this plays out fairly, or you don't. In which case I will personally put a bullet in your brain. Once, of course James has had his fun using you as his own person punch bag, possibly breaking every single bone in your body in the process. You will beg for death, but it won't come quickly. I will see to that. Maybe we will allow you to heal, give you time for bones to reset before we begin all over again. There are always new interrogation techniques I would love to see tested out on a real person. The possibilities are endless."

"Do it, I'd take that over hurting my own father. At least he would be free." I spat.

"Oh Mr. Cullen, you really don't understand do you? If you chose that option, then I will need a replacement for you as my star fighter. Seeing as I have him here already, then I will use him in your place. I cannot guarantee how long he will last in this world, but I will say that when he dies at the hands of an opponent, you will be there to witness it. You will be helpless to stop it. His broken body will be discovered by your beloved mother, who will probably die of a broken heart as I will send her footage of each and every fight, telling her this was your choice for him. She will know how you could have stopped this, but chose not to, signing his death warrant. So ultimately either way you will be responsible for killing him. The choice is simple. Do you allow him to die quickly with some dignity remaining, despite the fact that it would be at your hands, or do you give him a long, drawn out and very painful death?" He paused for a moment. "The alternative is I have him killed now, and bring in a replacement. How about Emmett? I'm pretty sure he would make an excellent fighter. Or Esme, now I don't fight women, but they have other uses around the place."

He chuckled at the look of horror on my face as I took in his words. Turning to address Carlisle.

"I would love to see just how much of a spitfire she is, I remember from our meetings when I was looking for an interior designer how focused she was, determined and forthright. Her body really is amazing for her age. I would love to see it in closer detail. I already have men watching her as she looks for her missing husband. Quite sad seeing her like this when I could make it all better, or worse."

I pulled desperately against Felix's vice like hold, but it was no use. Carlisle was looking in horror as Aro's words sunk in. I knew Aro would stop at nothing to get what he wanted, and if he decided to level his sights on my mom, then no one would be able to stop him,

Carlisle's voice choked out. "Not my family, please. Leave my wife out of this. I will do whatever it is you want."

I shook my head, he didn't realize just how sick and twisted Aro was, how he was relentless in and would stop at nothing to get what he wanted.

Carlisle looked at me. "It's okay son, do what you have to. Just remember, I love you even if you kill me tonight, we have to protect the family."

There was no way out of this. Either way Carlisle would be killed. I wasn't stupid, I knew that I would be killed eventually. But could I really kill my own father to protect the rest of my family?

Aro walked away from me, taking his place back on his seat. Felix and James stepped away, leaving me facing my father slowly coming to the realization, one of us would die here.

"Begin! Shouted Aro. Immediately the crowd began to shout and scream, the noise startled Carlisle, and I used this rather unfairly to my advantage. Charging at him, my shoulder made contact with his chest, knocking him from his feet and to the ground. He looked stunned for a moment before he rolled away from me. I watched as he got to his feet and we began to circle each other. For the first time I could clearly see the bruises that marred his body. Clearly someone had been having some fun with him, they would pay for that.

Carlisle's face gave nothing away, he was clearly looking a weak spot, something to monopolize on. I guessed he saw me as a stranger now, it would be easier to disconnect from the what expected of me. It would be easier if I could see him as someone else, someone I hated and wanted to kill. James.

I couldn't do it, there was no way I could kill my own father, yet at the back of my mind Aro's words played on a loop. He would make Carlisle fight in my place, his threat to go after my family played heavily on my mind. I had no doubt he would carry out his threat. The one thing I knew about Aro was that he was a man of his word. If he said he was going to go after Esme, then he would. How could I protect my family from him if I were dead? My compliance would be the only way to ensure their safety. The choice was not easy, but either way Carlisle would die, at least this way I could make it quick and relatively painless for him. We continued circling the knives, neither one of us wanting to be the first the make a lunge for a weapon, knowing it would give the other an advantage. I also knew it was the quickest way to end this and I didn't see the point in prolonging the inevitable. Decision made, I lunged forward, grabbing for a weapon. As expected Carlisle used this to his advantage, but I knew he would, so I braced my shoulders into his legs and he rolled over my back onto the ground.

By the time I turned around, he had rolled away and was getting back to his feet. He was still, unarmed, why had he not grabbed the knife from the ground? I rushed at him, knocking him off his feet, we fell to the ground and I pressed my arm across his neck snarling at him.

"Why won't you fight me?"

Deep down I knew the answer, I was his son, his own flesh and blood. Still the words that came out of his mouth shocked me.,

"Because I won't make this easy for you Edward. You have to face the consquences of your actions. Bella is dead because of you."

I lunged at him. "Don't you dare speak her name!"

"Oh, hurts does it, to hear the truth? You didn't deserve her love after all you did. She would've been better of walking away, but you dragged her back to you with the illusion you'd changed. She's dead because of you."

I couldn't believe he was bringing her into this, it was bad enough that Aro had threatened Esme and now my own father was using Bella to get my attention to get a reaction. I couldn't bear to hear her name anymore, it hurt too much. I punched him in the face. "Don't speak her name!" Disgusted, I got to my feet, towering over him. I kicked him in the ribs, watching as he doubled up in pain. "I didn't kill her, you know that."

Through a mouthful of blood and over the roar of the ground who were enjoying the spectacle I heard him utter. "Her blood is on your hands Edward, you killed her."

I was down on my knees, grabbing him but the shoulders and shaking him. "What did you say?"

"You killed her. It might not have been you that stabbed her, you may as well have done. It's your fault. I'm ashamed to call you my son."

White hot rage coursed through me, Bella was dead, she'd died in my arms. I felt the burden of it, knowing deep down Carlisle was right. It was my fault, it was my burden to live with. I was stills tunned Carlisle turned on me, using the only weak spot I had, My love for her would never leave me, neither would the guilt that I caused her death. Of course Carlisle knew what he was doing, goading me into ending his life.

I quickly tucked the knife into my back pocket, preferring to use my fists. He would pay for what he'd said.

I landed several punches on his face, watching as blood flowed from his mouth. Bones cracked, but I didn't care. The man before me wasn't my father, Carlisle Cullen any longer. He was the person who had to die, so I could live and protect my family.

The crowd were baying for blood, sensing the end was getting close. Out of the corner of my eye I saw Laurent and I stared at him. Slowly he nodded his head, but he wasn't looking at me he was staring at my father.

Confusion reigned in the following minutes as I heard multiple voices shouting and the crowd began to disperse. Hands took hold of me dragging me off my father who was also being manhandled. I could hear voices barking orders and it reminded me of the night the police raided the fight at the swimming pool, but this time I wasn't sure we would get out. I was pushed down a corridor, stumbling for balance I was then pushed up against a wall, an arm jammed across my throat restricting my breathing. "Make a sound and I will gut you here and now." James sneered into my face. I saw that a little way off, Laurent had my father who was barely conscious,

"I don't think so James. You see, I have nothing to lose right now."

Somehow I managed to push him away from me and he fell against the wall opposite us. My hand went to my back pocket and I held the knife between us. "Stay away from me."

James laughed. "Cullen, you are outnumbered. Do you really think you can get out of here? You really are dead now, no matter who you think will save you. I will be able to take care of you and no one will know or even care. Once I am done with you, I might even let daddy dearest off easily before I kill him too."

This was it, now or never for me. His words urging me on. Lunging forward with the knife as it found its way into his gut. I watched in a strange mixture of horror and pleasure as his face contorted in pain. I pushed harder, feeling the blade slide deeper inside him knowing it had found its mark.

"That is for everything you have done to me James, revenge is oh so sweet."

I pulled the knife out of him, watching as he staggered back, falling against the wall and slumping to the ground. He clutched the knife wound, trying to staunch the flow of blood that was spilling from him, but from what I could see, it was fruitless. I wanted to watch the life leave his body if only to make sure the bastard was dead. The blade I'd been holding fell to the floor.

Laurent called out to me. "Edward, we need to leave now. This way." I followed blindly down as supported Carlisle while led me down a long corridor and out through a door only to find us walking out to a welcoming committee which consisted of men all wearing black, with weapons pointed straight at us.

A voice commanded. "Get on your knees, now! Hands behind your head." Immediately I complied. Watching as my father was dropped on the floor by Laurent as he too obeyed. A sharp push in the back caused me to fall face down on the ground.

My legs were kicked apart, my face pressed into the cold, hard concrete.

"My father, you have to help him." I gasped. Surprise at my own turnaround as minutes previously I had wanted him dead. Something told me things were going in our favor now, I had no idea who these men were, but I was out of Aro's grasp once again and in the control of a branch of law enforcement.

"Silence! You don't tell me what to do. I'm in command here."

"He's hurt!" I objected.

"Right now, I don't care!"

I could only see several pairs of boots in my field of vision, before a pair of smart, shiny dress shoes appeared before me. I tried to look up at the person, but I was stopped from doing so. His voice was calmer than the men who had initially greeted us as he spoke. "You have the right to remain silent when questioned. Anything you say or do can be used against you in a court of law You have the right to consult an attorney before speaking to the police and to have an attorney present during questioning now or in the future. If you cannot afford an attorney, one will be appointed for you before any questioning, if you wish. If you decide to answer any questions now, without an attorney present, you will still have the right to stop answering at any time until you talk to an attorney. Knowing and understanding your rights as I have explained them to you, are you willing to answer my questions without an attorney present?""

"But you have to help him." I shouted.

"I said do you understand!" The voice shouted,

All I could was answer. "Yes, sir."

I was quickly cuffed with those plastic zip ties you see in the movies before I was dragged away. I saw the same being done to Laurent and a wounded Carlisle. It was like they didn't care, he could die and it would be my fault. They clearly saw us as some sort of criminals, people that deserved no respect or care. I was bundled into the back of a police car and driven away.

The next few hours passed in a blur, I was taken to a Police Station and processed before being thrown into a cell alone. I banged furiously on the door, demanding my phone call. I knew my rights. I shouted and screamed that I was a US citizen. I wanted to see my father, to know he was being looked after. They couldn't treat me like this. No one came, no one cared. Once again, I was alone.

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><p><strong>Authors Note.<strong>

Sorry about the delay, I know I am a day late in posting, after 3 hours of editing my document seriously messed up when I saved it last night. THEN I had the idea to change some of what happened. *rolls eyes*. So I am guessing you possibly have more questions than answers here. A longer chapter than last time, and there will be an update on Saturday.

Thanks to MaryMary123 I now have a Carlisle out-take brewing in my brain for this. It would cover these events, covering how they managed to get him and a lot more that happens in the next chapter.

Pre-read as always by Leigh Warner who gave me the idea of using Carlisle as 'insurance', so she is going to come into hiding with me. Thanks go out to Nothingwrongwithimperfection for talking me down of a ledge tonight when I was editing this.


	46. Question Time

**Disclaimer. I do not own Twilight or any of these characters. No copyright infringement is intended**

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><p>I lay on the bed, I found the fact I had swapped one cell for another quite amusing, only now I was being held by the Federal Government and not some crazed lunatic with a penchant for revenge. The irony was at least with Aro I knew what to expect next. Fitful sleep found me as my brain tried and failed to process everything that had happened in the last few days. I knew soon I would be taken for an interview, then they would charge me with the murder of Bella. I was just shocked it hadn't happened sooner, after all I had given my name when they booked me in. I guessed that they might be looking to see what other charges they could lay at my door too.<p>

I was woken by the sound of the cell door opening, but I didn't move. I had no reason to fear these men, they wouldn't hurt me while I was in custody, so I remained on the bed.

A large man dressed all in black stood over me. "Get on your feet, you're going for questioning."

Once again, I found myself obeying orders.

We walked through a maze of corridors, I couldn't help but compare being here to Volterra. Finally, we came to a stop in front of a door, which he opened before pushing me inside the room. It was sparse, plain white walls with a black table in the center and two chairs. He motioned to them saying. "Someone will be with you shortly." With that, he left.

I walked to the table and kicked out one of the chairs before sitting down. Staring at the large mirrored wall, I smiled while waving in a sarcastic manner. I knew there were people behind it, watching me. I wasn't stupid. All I had to do now, was wait for someone to come and see me.

No-one came, but I remained still, staring at an imaginary spot on the wall. They could watch me all they wanted, there was nothing they could glean from watching me. The clock on the wall told me I'd been here 20 minutes already what were they playing at? Trying to make me crack? Well, it sure as hell wasn't working, did they not know the hell I had been through of late? Mind games were something I was used to with Aro so they would have to really up their game to even come close. Eventually, a large man in a suit walked, taking a seat opposite me. "Mr Cullen, sorry for the delay. I had some other matters to attend to. I'm sure you can understand."

"I want my phone call, you have denied me my rights. I demand to speak to an attorney. You can't hold me like this."

He leaned on the table, 'I think you will find I can do any damn thing I like right are at the center of a very complicated enquiry right now. I don't think you have any idea just how serious this is. How did you and your father end up in that warehouse?"

I refused to answer. "How did your father sustain life threatening injuries Mr Cullen?

My eyes flashed to his, but again, I remained silent. "Oh, so there is something inside you that cares."

"How is he?" I was afraid of the answer.

"If you answer some of my questions, maybe I will answer yours. Now, did you inflict those injuries on your father? Because someone did, and that person is dangerous. Too dangerous to be left roaming the streets." He paused for a moment staring at me before continuing. "But I suspect that they aren't. I think you had a score to settle with Daddy dearest and you took it to that fight club to settle it. Only you didn't expect us to be there. Maybe it's a good thing we showed up when we did. Am I close"

I could feel my anger rising. My fists began to clench and unclench. He was getting to me. With a smile, he opened a manila folder that was in front of him and began to read.

"Edward Anthony Cullen aged 26. Middle child of Carlisle and Esme Cullen. A man who had been off the radar for several months only recently reappearing in a hospital suffering from near fatal drugs overdoses, combined with fight related injuries. Family moved him to a private clinic where records are not accessible to us unless we have a federal court order." He looked up at me. "Which we are in the process of obtaining." Then he looked back at the folder before him. "Long term partner Isabella Swan, who was recently seriously injured in the attack following a fire at the Chicago Civic Center. Only the suspect fled the scene once apprehended, although there are no eye witnesses to the attack on her, but the weapon was left behind. Fingerprints found on the weapon traced back to you."

He paused, looking at me. I was confused, she didn't say Bella was dead, it had to be a trick to get me to confess so they could then slap me with a homicide charge.

"Shall I continue? Well, we have been searching for you for the past week now, with no luck other than the phone call you made to your parents. I know that it was made from a payphone, but we couldn't get a trace in it. A woman in a diner in Engelwood reported seeing a man fitting your description the day after the incident, but he ran away. Any of this sounding familiar to you? Now, there is the body we found in the warehouse tonight. James Hunter. Single penetrating stab wound to the chest area puncturing his lung and causing massive internal bleeding. I guess we will find your prints on that weapon too. I'm also guessing when we get your blood work back from the lab, you are going to be able to explain, what I am expecting to be large quantities of narcotics and sedatives in your system, none of which are legal in the US?"

He sat back, closing the file and steepling his fingers under his chin. "So you see Mr Cullen, I have more than enough here to charge with you several felonies, all of which will see you serve time. All I need is your co-operation, and I can make some of it go away."

I went to open my mouth ready to tell him to go to hell, when the door was flung open and someone walked in. I wasn't paying them too much attention, guessing this was some part of a good cop/bad cop routine they had planned. Only I wasn't willing to play their games. I watched in amusement as my inquisitor sat up in his chair a little straighter and looked concerned.

A voice barked out. "What the hell do you think you're doing Detective?" He snapped. My eyes went wide as I thought I recognized the man who had just walked into the room, but it couldn't be. I had to be dreaming, as otherwise the man standing before me in a smart suit, commanding the instant respect of the man interviewing me was Laurent.

The Detective was on his feet. "Sir, I'm sorry. I wasn't aware that you wanted to speak to Mr Cullen."

"Of course you weren't, why would you be? You are dismissed and anything that Mr Cullen might have said to you will be forgotten. Do I make myself clear?"

"Yes Sir."

We were then left alone. Laurent smiled, removing his tie and undoing the top couple of buttons on his shirt, he took the seat the other detective had just vacated. Letting out a deep breath, he spoke.

"Hello Edward. Allow me to formally introduce myself, I'm Special Agent Laurent Sebine. I work undercover at the FBI. My team infiltrates the underground gangs and criminal organizations that are plaguing this country."

"What, you're a cop?" I exclaimed unsure if it had heard him correctly.

He nodded his head. "Yes, well, I'm a bit more than a standard cop. I was deep undercover within the Volturi, and have been for that last 12 months trying to infiltrate them. I wanted to get enough evidence to be able to bring an end to Aro and his brother for good. I was close to it, then you arrived and things changed. Aro was so hell bent on revenge it was scary. This was a side to him no one there had seen before. We had to make a decision, namely did we pounce and risk losing the evidence we had already, or did we let him continue and build a stronger case. We chose the latter option."

He paused, giving me just enough time to lunge across the table toward him. "You bastard! I went through hell there and you're telling me it could've been stopped sooner?"

Laurent stood, pushing me back into my seat.

"I get why you're so angry Edward, I really do, But you have to understand why we did what we did. It wasn't just my decision, not just my work at stake had I been uncovered. That nearly happened on more than one occasion. I would have been killed, and you would have died there too." He paused for a moment. "Think about it. Who was the one who looked out for you time and time again, who was it who managed to get you out of there in the end?"

"Just to hand me back to them." I spat.

"Yes, but just getting you free nearly ruined everything for the case and my career. I disobeyed an order that night. I know it's hard to get your head around, but trust me. I did what I had to. Aro knew you were alive, meaning someone had betrayed him. He started looking at us all very closely so James acted on his own a couple times, knowing if he struck close enough it would get to you, that it would draw you out. I simply acted on the opportunity that presented itself. James wanted to kill you, deliver your body to Aro. At least this way you are still breathing."

I was on my feet, pacing the room as I listened to what he had to say. Hearing the words didn't make the actions behind them any easier to accept. "I don't deserve to be alive. Bella is dead, I almost killed my own father to save my own life. What kind of monster am I?"

I couldn't hold back the emotions any longer and broke down. I fell to my knees as tears fell from my eyes and my chest hurt from the sobs that escaped it. My world was shattered around me. How could anyone want me in their lives now?

Laurent was in front of me, he knelt down before he put his arms around me, allowing me to let everything out. Once I began to calm down, he spoke to me again.

"Who said Bella was dead?"

"I was there, she died. I couldn't do anything." The sobs started again. "Carlisle said-"

Laurent took a firm hold of me, shaking my shoulders to get me to look at him.

"Edward, listen to me. I know you have no reason to trust anything I tell you, but believe me. Bella is alive. She is in a private clinic right now, recovering in peace in quiet."

I stared at him in amazement. "What? How? Can I see her?"

A slight smile broke out on his face. "It's complicated and I will explain it to you. I will also arrange for you to see her, but I need to make some calls. I cannot see it being a problem." He got to his feet. "Will you be okay if I step out to make arrangements, I will be back as quickly as possible."

I nodded, needing to see Bella for myself, only then would this nightmare be one step closer to being over.

-O-O-O-O-O-

Laurent was there for me every step of the way, he guided me through the corridors of the clinic Bella was being treated in. We paused outside the door and he turned to me.

"Bella doesn't know everything that's happened. She was heavily sedated for a few days. When she came around, you were the first person she asked for, becoming quite agitated. The decision was made to tell her you were in protective custody until we were able to arrest James for the attack."

"She believed you?" I was surprised.

Laurent chuckled. "No. I think she knew there was more that I wasn't telling her. She can be quite… Insistent at times."

"You got to see her?" I'd hoped that she hadn't worked out what had really happened to me.

"I did, only once though. It was difficult to get to see her and away from Volterra without raising suspicion. I had to be so careful." He placed his hand on my shoulder. "Go to her, she would love to see you I'm sure."

I opened the door, my palms were sweaty and nerves took hold. I stood, taking in the sight of her. Bella was lying on the bed, facing away from the door. Her head turned slightly at the sound of the door opening and I heard her mutter. "I told you to leave me alone, I'm not hungry, I don't want company. All I want is to be left alone."

Swallowing deeply, I hoped my voice would hold out. "Well, if you're sure I can always come back another time."

She spun around, her face lighting up briefly before she winced in pain. I rushed to her, trying to get her to lie back down.

"Edward, is it really you? I've been worried about you, they told me you were in protective custody. No one would tell me anything, Carlisle and Esme wouldn't take my calls, Emmett was just evasive and Alice is out of the country. Please tell me everything is okay?"

I stared into her eyes as I tried to work out what to tell her. I knew there was no point in lying to her, knowing how lying previously had almost torn us apart. The only thing Bella deserved from me was the truth. I knew she was taking in the new injuries I was sporting, there was no way to disguise them. Her fingers traced over my eyebrow and the swelling around my right eye. I winced slightly at the pain, but it was worth it to feel her touch on my once again,

Taking a seat on the edge of the bed, I held her hands in mine as I prepared once again to tell her everything.

An hour later we were sat in silence, Bella had once again listened to me telling her how I had been abducted, beaten up and forced to fight. Only this time I had been made to fight my own father and I had considered ending his life. How I had turned his words about her death being at my hands into pure rage before I beat him so badly they had used the words 'life threatening injuries' to me. Tears spilled down her cheeks, I ached to reach out to her, for her to tell me it was okay. But deep down I knew she couldn't after hearing the words that had filled the room.

"I should go." The words came out barely in a whisper. I stood and walked to the door. "I know you don't want to hear it, but I am sorry for everything you've been through. If I'd not been so selfish and let you go, you wouldn't be here now." I looked at her one last time before turning and preparing to walk out of the door, and out of her life for the last time. "I'll always love you Bella, and you will always have a piece of my heart."

My hand was on the door handle as I whispered "Goodbye." Under my breath. Then I heard one word that stopped me dead in my tracks.

"Wait."

I froze in place, afraid to turn around in case there was any sign of hatred on her face. I couldn't bear to see it if there were.

"I don't want you to go anywhere. I really don't see how us being apart is going to make this mess any better. Have you learned nothing from the last months of hell we both went through?"

Turning around I opened my mouth to speak, but she cut me off. "Don't you dare give me any bullshit. I'm an adult and I am more than capable of making up my mind about what I want, and what's good for me. I honestly thought we were past all this."

"Bella I-"

"No! Listen to me when I tell you I love you. I was prepared to be with you before you told me the baby wasn't yours and it belonged to that monster. Can you not see we are stronger together than apart? Everything you have been through and survived makes me love you more. I have no idea how you are even standing right now. What strength it takes."

I walked over to her, ashamed that once again I had managed to push her feeling aside and acting in a way that I thought would be better for her.

Sitting down next to her, I put my arm around her. "I really don't know how I got so lucky."

She nudged me. "No, neither do I. Now, can you stop with the pity party and let us work through this together. Agreed?"

I placed a kiss on her forehead. "Agreed."

"Stay?" She asked, and I nodded. Hoping that the nursing staff wouldn't throw me out. I was sure that Laurent would have asked them to give us some time, knowing it would be needed.

Laying down on the bed together, I wrapped my arms around her, pulling her to my chest while also being careful not to hurt her.

As I drifted to sleep, I muttered into her hair. "I love you Isabella Swan." And I did, never had those words felt truer than they did at that moment.

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><p><strong>Authors Note<strong>

PHEW! So, Bella is alive, Edward is out, Aro, James and Carlisle are… yeah well we shall see in the next chapter.

Thank you to Kirst74 for allowing me to use her surname for Laurent without questioning why! Well done to sujari6 who was the only person who guessed Laurent was undercover - I was impressed.

Pre-read by Leigh Warner.


	47. Visting Hours

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight, and no copyright infringement is intended.**

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><p>I woke when a nurse opened the door to the room, my head snapped to her. I guessed I was still adjusting. She quirked her brow at me. "You shouldn't be here." She whispered. Smiling at her, I mouthed sorry as I slid off the bed and made my way to the door. A warm smile lit up her face. "You have someone here to see you, they are in the waiting room."<p>

I knew the only person who knew I was here was Laurent, so I wasn't concerned. Walking toward the room, I saw him sitting there. He looked so calm and collected. Then I heard my name being called, I turned to see Charlie Swan walking toward me, he struggled to keep the anger he felt from showing on his face, I could see that as I looked at him.

"About time you showed your face. My daughter has been lying there, near death for the best part of a week and where were you?" He was now standing right in front of me, his face so close to mine. "Were you off with that Heidi woman while my daughter lay fighting for her life?" He pushed my chest and I stumbled backward. "You think I don't know? Bella turns up suddenly back in May, walking around like a zombie. She thought I didn't notice, but I'm a goddamn cop and she is my daughter."

"Charlie, I'm sorry. The last thing I ever meant to do was hurt her."

"So, you admit you hurt her? It's your fault she was nearly killed! And you stand there and tell me you're sorry! How could you?"

He turned and walked away from me, his hands on either side of his head as he paced the floor, finally turning back to me. "I should kill you for what you've done to her. Bella deserves better. I wish you hadn't come back. She would have moved on, found someone who would love her like she deserved. Not cheated on her, you are not worthy of her love."

Charlie looked over my should and I turned to see who he was looking to. Laurent was standing just behind me.

"Chief Swan." He nodded at Charlie.

"Agent." Charlie's voice was clipped, like he wanted to say more.

"Is there a problem here?" Laurent looked from me to Charlie. I was fighting back the tears and emotions that threatened to overwhelm me. I simply shook my head.

"No, I think I've made my thoughts on the matter quite clear." Charlie's tone was bordering on abrupt. He refused to make eye contact. "I just want to see my daughter, and I want him out of here."

Laurent spoke to me. "Edward, can you give us a moment. I need to speak to Chief Swan. Alone"

I nodded, stepping away. I watched as Laurent led Charlie away from me. Their voices were hushed, but I could see they were clearly having a heated discussion, that was clear from their body language. Eventually, Laurent shook his hand and walked toward me, his expression grim.

"Let's get you out of here." He led me toward the exit, but I stopped.

"No. I need answers. There is a lot you are not telling me Agent Sebine. You need to be honest with me."

He stopped. "Yes, there is a lot I haven't told you. Chief Swan wanted you charged with whatever I could make stick, I have ignored him so far. He believes that you stabbed Bella. It's been hard keeping a lot of this from him. As soon as he found out he jumped on the first plane and started to make a fuss. He has been kept under near house arrest while we wrapped up the operation at Volterra with your and your father."

"You never told me what happened to Aro, I need to know."

"In that case, we need to take you back downtown, to the unit and give you a proper de-brief. I know this is a lot to take in, and I understand you want answers, but I cannot just tell you everything you want to know. This is a big thing for me to ask you given how much you have been through, but I need you to trust me."

I nodded at him, almost afraid of what he would reveal later.

"When can I see Carlisle?"

"I can take you there now. I must warn you, he is a bit of a mess. It all looks far worse than it is. I tried to get to him before James had a chance, but I was too late, I'm sorry."

I nodded. "Please?"

The journey to the wing of the hospital where Carlisle was being treated seemed to take forever, when really it was only a few blocks away. Once inside we were told that Mr Cullen was allowed no visitors. Laurent simply flashed his badge and a smile, Then we were allowed through. I wanted to run, hide away from what I was about to see, but I knew I had to do this I was my fault after all. Opening the door, I couldn't breathe. Seeing him lying there was hard, he looked so broken. His face was swollen and badly bruised, his right arm was in a sling and I knew there would be more injuries I couldn't see. It was different to seeing Bella, what happened to her was outside my control, this, I had a hand in his injuries. Laurent placed his hand on my shoulder. "I'll give you a few minutes."

Slowly I walked over to the bed and stood next to it, taking in what had happened to my father. He lay there, pain etched on his face even as he slept it was clear to see. I was left wondering exactly how many injuries I had caused him. Was it me that inflicted the cut above his eye? The black eye he was sporting? Or how many of the cracked ribs I knew he would have were at my hands or more accurately, feet.

I let a sob free, tired of holding it back. I whispered. "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry.."

His eyes opened, and a grimace of pain crossed his face, the words were strained and edged with pain. "It's okay son."

I didn't know what to say, I wanted to hug him, but that looked to be a bad idea."I caused most of this, I don't know how you can bear to look at me, knowing I was willing to kill you in there."

"You were willing to do what you had to, ultimately to protect me and your family. That takes some guts Edward. I would've willingly died there if it meant you would be safe, but either way that was never guaranteed,"

He coughed, wincing in pain as he grabbed his side with his good arm. "Do you need me to call a nurse? I asked, slightly panicked,

"No, it's fine. Just a couple of cracked ribs and some bruising, nothing they can do." He smiled weakly,

"I did that to you, and I'm sorry." I felt sick remembering now I kicked him so savagely while he was on the ground. "Why did you say those things to me?"

He sighed. "I had to push you, I goaded you, pushed the buttons I knew would get the reaction I needed. I didn't mean any of it. You do know that don't you?"

I nodded. Unsure if I would be able to vocalize how I felt. Carlisle continued. "You did what you had to. You did nothing those bastards hadn't already done me over a few times before I saw you again." He tried to make a joke of it.

I needed to know more. "How did they get you? I thought Emmett's guys were with you?"

A frown took over his face. "They were." He sighed deeply. "I got a phone call, you asked me for help. Begged me. Then a voice came on the line, saying they were helping you out, they'd found you beaten up downtown. I just wanted to get you to safety. I told them I had an errand to run, and to stay with Esme. They never questioned it. Of course, it was a trap. When I got there, you were nowhere to be seen and I was attacked and taken to that madman. I just wanted to protect you, for keep you safe, I failed." His voice became a whisper. "I begged them to see you, then they beat me up, told me you were dead already. I knew it wasn't true, you were stronger than that. Finally, they dragged me out of the cell I was being kept in. Seeing you there. Son, if there was any way I could've swapped places with you while ensuring your safety, I would've done in a heartbeat. I almost gave up hope at one point, then special Agent Sebine came to see me. He brought me food and water, told me not to give up hope. To trust him as there were things he couldn't tell me, but he would do his best to ensure we both made it out alive. I just knew I could trust him."

He smiled, glancing over my shoulder, and I turned to see Laurent standing there. "I made good on that promise Carlisle, although I did think at one point it might be hopeless." He moved to take a seat next to the bed. "You see, when Aro announced you were to fight that night, things were not in place, we hadn't expected that from him, the plan had been to strike at Volterra, but we had to move quickly. There was no other choice."

I looked at him, "Why did you not warn me, you could've found a way,"

He shook his head. "There wasn't. You had to hate me for bringing you back there, that emotion has to be real. Any sign of deception or untruth would have spelled death for both of us. It was a gamble that paid off."

"Thank you. For saving my son." Carlisle smiled and Laurent simply nodded.

"So what happens now?" I asked, curious as to what would be happening next.

He rose to his feet. "We need to go back downtown, and I can tell you more. But for now, all you need to concentrate on is the fact you are free Edward, this nightmare is over."

Over. The single word which carried so much weight behind it. Little did Laurent know that I would never get over this. How the memories would stay with me during the day, and haunt me at night, possibly forever.

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><p><strong>Authors Note:<strong>

Thanks for reading, please do consider hitting the review button and please do sign in – I do like to reply to you

Pre-read by Leigh Warner.


	48. Back Down To Earth

**Disclaimer. I do not own Twilight or any of these characters. No copyright infringement is intended**

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><p>We made our way back downtown to the Police Station so I could be debriefed as Laurent had promised, but a phone call interrupted our journey. Laurent's tone became very different to the one I was used to, it reminded me of how he'd spoken to the officer who had been questioning me. Every nerve in my body automatically when on red alert as he was clearly trying not to say anything I shouldn't hear, but as the same time I knew it was related to me.<p>

He turned the car around suddenly at an intersection after ending the call.

"What's going on?" I asked, afraid of the answer.

"I need to take you somewhere else. There is a situation." His tone was abrupt.

"I get that, but I'm a bit tired of being kept in the dark. If this is anything to do with me then, you have to tell me. Don't I deserve that much?"

Laurent slammed his foot on the brake, bringing the car to a sudden halt. My chest hurt from the seatbelt as I was propelled forward with the force. I turned to him, he looked angry.

"What the fuck are you doing?" I asked.

"You want answers? Then I will give them to you. All this is against my better judgement, but seeing as you want to know so desperately, I will tell you. But first we have to get you somewhere safe."

Safe. What did he mean by safe? I was with a Federal Agent, what could possibly happen to me while I was in his line of sight. I wasn't sure I wanted to know the answer. We sped through the streets until we pulled into an underground car park. Laurent told me to stay put before he made a quick call telling someone we had arrived. Laurent then got out of the car and walked around to my side. I watched as he surveyed the garage before opening the door. He led me to the elevator, then once we reached our destination he once again indicated I should wait as he looked down the hallway. Once he was satisfied, we made out way to the apartment. Inside, the door was locked and he made another call to say things were secure. When he was finished, I knew it was time for me to be told the truth.

"Are you gonna tell me what's going on? There is obviously something you aren't telling me. Is it my family, are they safe?" Panic began to rise in me and I paced the floor.

"Edward, I promised you to the truth, and you shall have it." He indicated to a couch. "Take a seat."

I sat down and watched as Laurent sat on the couch opposite me.

"You know already James is dead. Aro was taken into custody and was being held in a secure location. Today, he was being moved, but there was an incident. The transport was run off the road, and he escaped."

I felt like my world had stopped turning. "What! I thought he was locked up. How could this happen?"

"I don't know, details are still sketchy at the moment. We need to ensure you are safe, that's why you are here. Until we know more, you are to remain here, it's a safe house."

"My family, Bella!" They were my concern.

"Esme is being taken to another safe house across town and Emmett had gone to the lake house. They are safe Edward. We also have extra security on both Carlisle and Bella. Not that anyone knows where they are."

"Can you promise me that?"

He simply nodded. All I could do now was wait and trust Laurent, event though it was the last thing I wanted to do.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

The apartment I was in was modern and clean, almost to the point of being sterile. There was no character, nothing to make it feel like anything other than a shiny modern prison cell, and I'd seen enough of those to last me a lifetime.

There were agents stationed outside the door, but not inside as Laurent guessed I needed space to get my head around everything. The only interaction I had with them was when I ordered takeout, which they brought me. Not that I was hungry when it arrived, it was more routine for me, the semblance of normality. There was nothing normal about this situation.

Night fell and I found my eyes drooping, I'd been to hell and back. My body and mind were ready to give up on me and I was ready to let them. Laurent stayed with me all day, taking calls when he needed to, but never once leaving me alone. He brought up the issue of me needing 'help' to deal with what I'd been through. He promised it would be made available, all I had to do was ask. Only the best would be afforded to me if I needed to seek therapy. I laughed in his face. All I wanted was my life back, to be normal once again and put this nightmare behind me once and for all. Right now, I had no idea what normal was like anymore, but I was willing to give it a shot. But while Aro was out there, and a threat to me, to them, it was never going to happen.

Neither of us got any sleep that night, I was too on edge. Every noise caused my heart to beat faster in my chest, I was scared he would find me, that he would come for me once again. While ever he was out there, I would never be free.

The next day walking around the apartment I was like a zombie, I'd wanted to go see Bella, to make sure she was okay, but Laurent told me I couldn't, that it wasn't safe either for me to be seen outside, or for her to have me there. Of course, he was right, but it didn't mean I had to be happy with things.

Mid afternoon Laurent got a phone call that changed everything. He told me he had to go; that he was needed. I knew instantly it was to do with Aro, but he wouldn't answer any of my questions. The agents previously outside were briefed, told not to allow me to leave under any circumstances and that backup was on the way. I knew better than to argue with him.

Hours passed with no news, nothing. I switched the TV on, flipping through the news channels to see if there was anything being reported that might tell me what was going on, there wasn't. What surprised me was the total lack of news regarding Aro's escape. Surely a madman loose on the streets would be worth reporting wouldn't it? Then I realized, they probably had a news blackout in force.

Around 5pm the door to the apartment opened, causing me to jump. Laurent walked in, a serious expression on his face. "Edward, I have news." Was all he said before taking a seat on the couch. Taking a deep breath, I followed him, sitting on the couch opposite while I waited for him to tell me. His eyes met mine as he spoke.

"He's dead." Was all he said.

"Who's dead?" My mind immediate thought he meant Carlisle. "He can't be, he was getting better. This is all my fault."

Laurent spoke once again. "Not Carlisle. Aro. We got a lead on where he was earlier today. I went along to help apprehend him."

My eyes went wide as the words sunk in. "Aro's dead?"

Laurent nodded slowly. "Yes. We had the warehouse he was hiding in surrounded, when we moved in to arrest him, he pulled a weapon and shot at us. Another officer was wounded, My partner shot him, he died at the scene. You now have nothing to worry about where Aro Volturi is concerned. I just wish we could bring him to justice for what he did to you, and all the others."

"You're sure, this isn't some sick joke of his is it? You're sure it was him." I wasn't sure how they could mistake anyone else for him.

"Aro is dead, I promise you. I saw it happen. His organization is in ruins, the key players were all in custody already. While he was alive, you would've needed to give evidence against him as they feared reprisals. But now that he is gone, I am sure there are people who would be more than happy to talk in exchange for a lighter sentence for their part in his sick, twisted world."

I felt like I was in a dream, one that might end at end moment, bringing reality crashing back down on me. "He's dead. Really and truly."

"Yes Edward, I promise you. Aro is lying in the City Morgue right now." He glanced at his watch. "Look, I have to head back to the unit to file reports and make statements about what happened, but I wanted to be the one to tell you. I'll be back later on. You should get some rest, it's been a long few days."

I nodded, unable to form any words. Of course he was right, it had been a long few days and it felt like a lifetime since I last slept. After Laurent left I made my way to the bedroom where I crawled under the sheets wishing Bella was here with me, but knowing it wouldn't be long until we were together once again. As I closed my eyes an drifted off to sleep I was confronted by images that came to me in my dreams. As hard as I tried to wake up I couldn't. I had to watch the events play out before me.

I ran through dark corridors, lost and desperately trying to find my way out, I could hear footsteps behind me, but they didn't run, they walked with purpose. Slow, steady steps getting closer and closer. I stumbled and fell, turning around to see the person who was following me. As he drew closer and closer the panic inside me grew. Then he stepped out of the shadows, his face only half illuminated as he smiled at me, I felt better seeing Carlisle standing before me, but any joy was short lived as I saw a gun in his hand, pointing straight at me. His face covered in cuts and bruises, one eye was awoken almost shut. I cowered away from him, knowing he could end my life here, and I deserved it. Then I heard more footsteps before a female figure appeared at his side, it was Bella. Protectively he put his arm around her, pulling her to him. They shared a moment of unspoken understanding before he spoke. "I hope you can live with what you have done."

I watched in horror as the gun turned into a knife, which he then plunged into the Bella. I tried to scream, but I could make no sound. Her face contorted in pain and horror as she felt the blade inside her. Her hand went to the wound, trying to stem the blood flow. She looked straight at me. "You did this, it's all your fault. My blood is on your hands."

I looked at my hands and they were covered in blood. Glancing back up at the pair, I saw he was holding a gun again and was pointed to his temple, finger on the trigger.

"You might as well have pulled the trigger yourself." Were the only words he said before a smile graced his lips. Seconds later he pulled the trigger and blew his brains out. Finally, a figure stepped out of the shadows, but I knew it couldn't be him he was dead, Aro.

He smiled at me, before throwing his head back in laughter as he stepped over the bodies of Carlisle and Bella as if the were trash. He stopped right in front of me

I screamed and this time the sound could find it's way to freedom. I found myself sitting upright in bed, sweat covering my entire body, my chest heaving as my heart pounded in my chest. I bolted to the bathroom and heaved into the toilet. Once I was done, I pulled myself to my feet and moved to the sink, filling it with water before scooping it up in my hands and dousing my face with it, repeatedly. I found myself looking. In the mirror, but the person staring back at me was almost a stranger. I hated him, he was someone I didn't want to be or know. The only positive I could find was it had been a nightmare, that was all. Now I was awake, I knew both Bella and Carlisle were safe, Aro was dead. But still I didn't feel like this was over, like I was free.

A feral scream fell from my mouth as I punched the bathroom mirror, once it was smashed I slumped against the wall, pulling my knees to my chest wrapping my arms around them as I cried. I have no idea how long I was there for, I only became aware of where I was when I saw Laurent kneeling in front of me. He reached his hand out and touched my knee gently, causing me to flinch in response, letting out a whimper. I was truly broken.

He sat on the floor opposite me, refusing to move. He spoke in soft gentle words. "Edward, what happened?"

All I could do was shrug, how did I begin to tell someone about my inner demons, the ones that wouldn't leave me alone. How my dreams were being haunted by visions and images I couldn't bear to see. We sat in silence until I managed to find both the words and the courage to speak.

Eventually, three words fell from my lips, almost in a whisper. "I need help."

"What do you need? Tell me and I will make it happen Edward, I promise you,"

We sat in silence as I worked through what I wanted to say and how to express it without sounding weak."I need to get away, to speak to someone who can help me with what I've been through. I'm no good to anyone. It's too much right now."

He simply nodded. "I can arrange it, let me make some calls. See when they can get you in.

"Now. I have to go, now." I uttered. "It can't wait, I have to get out of here."

"Okay, I will get you over to see your father and Bella, your mom too."

"No! I can't see them, they won't understand, they will ask me to stay, but I can't I have to go, get help. This is for them as much as me. I've been to hell and back, they have too. I need to do this, for me and for them."

He simply nodded before getting to his feet and leaving me to make a call. I could hear him talking but didn't listen, it felt wrong to eavesdrop. When he came back into the room, he simply told me. "It's done. You are being admitted tomorrow."

I thanked him before looking at my hand. "This is becoming a bit of a habit," I laughed to myself.

"I've called a doctor." He confirmed.

There was no point in arguing, I knew that. So I ran my bleeding hands under the bathroom tap, watching as once again blood was washed away, only this time it was mine and not someone else's.

A soft knock at the door startled me. Laurent went to answer it and I heard voices whispering as they approached,

"Edward, this is Doctor Turner, he is going to take care of you. Fix up your hand and give you something to help you sleep.

"No! No drugs" I gasped. "I can't do that again, I need to be aware of what's happening."

Doctor Turner looked at me. "Okay, let's talk about it after I fix your hand up. Deal?"

I nodded, sure that I would get my way, but knowing it wouldn't be easy.

Once I was checked over, it was confirmed I'd broken my little finger, the pain was intense as he strapped it together and the memory of this being done previously almost tipped me over the edge. They'd been broken at the sadistic hands of James. Doctor Turner wanted to give me a sedative when I became too anxious, I flat out refused. Instead, it fell to Laurent to calm me down, reminding me I was free, that they were not going to hurt me.

I was exhausted, physically and emotionally, yet the thought of closing my eyes scared me. What images would come to me, whose face would I see before me as I slept. Eventually I decided to accept the offer of a sedative, only when they assured it wouldn't last too long and that I would be able to rest without interruption. My panic rose as I prepared to feel the needle break my skin and take away my control, but it happened so painlessly. The first I knew was when I was drifting to sleep before I realized it had happened. Sleep of sorts finally claimed me.

When I woke it was with a heavy heart. My decision had been made, I needed to get help, professional help with what I'd been through. The last week felt like it had happened to someone else, reuniting with Bella, thinking she was dead, being recaptured after being betrayed by the one person I had trusted before finally being told to fight my own father to the death, or face far more serious consequences. Only then to find out the whole thing was part of a huge undercover operation to take down Aro. Seriously, you couldn't make that shit up. But unfortunately it was real, it had happened and the emotional scars would last far longer than the physical ones, not just for me.

Yes, Carlisle told me he understood, and had been willing to give up his life for me to live, but I'd been ready to take his away. Okay, I was in between a rock and a hard place, but if it had come down to it, could I have really killed my own father? The thought that I could, meant I needed help.

I made my way downstairs to find Laurent sitting on the couch waiting for me. There was a small black Holdall on the floor, and I looked at it before I looked to him. "Some essentials for you." He clarified. "I assumed you didn't want to return home to collect them yourself, so I arranged for them to be picked up. Your family thinks you are staying here until things settle down. I don't know what you want to tell them." He left that last part hanging. What was I going to tell them?

"Hi! I'm seriously fucked up and need to have my brain rewired."

No, that wouldn't do. They would want to know, to visit me and I couldn't allow it. I needed to make a clean break while I sorted myself out.

"I want to write them letters. Do you have some paper?" I asked Laurent.

He shook his head, but put his phone to his ear, demanding that writing paper and envelopes were brought to him.

"Have a coffee, maybe something to eat, it's going to be a long drive."

I nodded, knowing that he was right. I hadn't asked where I was going, putting my faith in the man I thought had betrayed me once again. This time I knew it wasn't misplaced.

Thirty minutes later someone appeared at the door, Laurent thanked them and handed me. Fresh pad of writing paper and a pen. "Make sure these are your own words Edward. Not like last time." With that, he walked out of the apartment, leaving me to do this alone.

Sitting with the paper in front of me, I remembered the last time I wrote letters to my family, under extreme pressure and threat of them being harmed. I'd told them not to look for me, to forget me. This time I would be asking the, to give me space and time, asking for their love and understanding. Setting pen to paper I began to write,

_Bella,_

_I love you. With every part of me, until my last breath and beyond. This letter is hard for me to write as I know it will break your heart, just like writing it, is breaking mine. I promise you these are my words, no one is forcing me to write them, there are no threats this time. Every word I write is the truth, and comes from me._

_I have to leave, I'm not running away, but I need to get my broken head together. So much has happened, we've been through so much both together and apart. I need to ensure I can be the man you deserve to have in your life, not just the broken, empty shell I am now. Being with you makes me happy, so very happy. You complete me in a way I never thought possible. Which is why I have to go and seek help, therapy to piece myself back together._

_I wish I could tell you this to your face, but I couldn't bear to leave you again, so this is the only way I can do this._

_There will be no contact from me while I am there, I need to do this and if I see you I will break down and come back with you, and that will do neither of us any good._

_I only hope that you can forgive me this, but fully understand if you can't or if you decide to move on with your life. There is nothing to hold you to me and I wouldn't ask you to wait for me. Do what is right for you, grab every opportunity with both hands and never let go._

_When I return, I can only hope you will want to at the very least speak to me, but I understand if you don't._

_I hate myself for doing this, but it really is the only way. _

_Please look after my heart, I have left part of it with you._

_Forever yours._

_Edward_.

Writing the letter was the hardest thing I have ever had to do. It broke what was left of my heart, as I knew it would break Bella's, but it was for the best.

Once it was done and it was sealed in an envelope, I wrote one to Carlisle and Esme. Telling them I loved them and asked them for their understanding in this, and for them to support Bella.

Handing both letters to Laurent I picked up the Holdall.

"I'm ready."

He nodded. "You know I am not coming with you, don't you?"

This was the part I hated. The thought of travelling with a couple of people I didn't know scared me. Yes, I could trust them, but I didn't know them. He looked at me, it was as if he could read my thoughts.

"Let me make some calls." He then stepped out into the hallway.

When he came back inside, he had a small smile on his face. "Seems that my boss is feeling generous. I am coming with you."

I heaved a sigh of relief as we made our way out to the car for a long drive that would lead to a safe haven for me, somewhere I would be allowed to break down and rebuild my life.

* * *

><p><strong>Authors Note;<strong>

PHEW! There was alot happening there. And yes, I know it looks like Edward is running away again, but he really does need some help with what happened to him, it's like he has a form of PTSD and being around everyone is not going to get better unless he gets this help.

We are in the home stretch with this. Last night I completed the story so I only have to edit it now. So another three chapters and we will be done. Can you believe it? I can't.

PS. Sorry I missed Saturdays update... My bad.

Pre-read by Leigh Warner.


	49. Therapy & Homecoming

**Disclaimer. I do not own Twilight or any of these characters. No copyright infringement is intended**

* * *

><p>Arriving at in Mount Pleasant was like being in another world. I was so very afraid when I first walked inside, after just over 4 hours in the car had tired me out. My cell phone remained switched off to whole way. I knew if I heard from Bella or my family during the drive I would likely demand to be taken back to her. The moment we walked inside I was overwhelmed by how homely the place felt. The building was large, with lots of open spaces. I was quickly introduced to Leslie, who would be the person I would have the most contact with, she would be there to support me through the counselling sessions. I warmed to her, she was friendly and made me feel comfortable.<p>

After Laurent left I felt truly alone for the first time He promised to deliver the letters personally and answer any questions they had. I'd made him promise me he wouldn't tell them where I was, no matter how much they asked and wanted to know, and he agreed.

The following morning my sessions started, I hadn't expected them to start so quickly, I'd expected to be given a couple of days to settle in. It was hard for me to open up, they promised not to judge me, but the horrors I had seen and been a part of were now ingrained so deep in me I really didn't see a way to seperate them. But that was one of the reasons I was here, to get rid of my demons, once and for all.

**-O-O-O-O-**

Six weeks later

Today was the day I had been both looking forward to and dreading in equal measure. I had been making great progress in my therapy, well I say great progress, if you count the first week being spent resembling sniveling mess, huddled into a ball then yeah I was making great progress. I had managed to tell my therapist everything that happened to me. tell someone exactly what had happened from the moment I stupidly slept with Heidi, right through to breaking down in front of Laurent..

There was no judgement in her eyes, only compassion and concern. Each time I said I didn't deserve to live I was reminded that I did, and I very much alive, and I should embrace it. So so many others had died and didn't have this chance. Of course, she was right. I just needed to get my head around it first.

I was stood outside in the sunshine, waiting for my visitor to arrive, unsure of what would happen. Then I saw a black sedan pull through the gates, I could only watch as it pulled up and the driver stepped out.

"Hello Edward. Nice to see you again" I was greeted with a smile.

"Hi Laurent, thanks for coming to see me." I held out my hand to him, but he pulled me into a one armed embrace.

"Shall we take a walk? I assume that you asking me here was not just because you wanted to see me."

I nodded, leading the way. We talked about how things were going here in therapy, but nothing about what happened back in Chicago in general, how work was going for him now he was out from his undercover mission. We discussed lots of subjects, but not the one I wanted to know about. I wanted to ask how Bella had taken the news of my leaving, but I was still scared of the answer. As I walked him back to his car, he went to the trunk and pulled out a small leather bound journal, bound with a piece of red ribbon.

"This is for you. I promised I would pass it on when I saw you, but I couldn't guarantee you would read it."

My hands shook as I took them from him, instantly recognizing the handwriting on the envelope on the top, it was from Bella. I didn't know how to react, so I thanked him, planning to deal with this later once I was alone.

After eating dinner, I retreated to my room. I sat with the letter and journal in front of me. Was I ready to open them and see the words she had put onto the paper? What if she told me that she hated me and never wanted to see me again? I would have to deal with that, knowing it was my doing,

Taking a deep breath I opened the letter that was on the top.

_Edward,_

_This is a journal that I have been keeping for a while now. I started it while you were first gone, it was a way for me to get the thoughts out of my head and into some kind of order. The entries continued when you came home, and it should give you an insight into how I feel about about, how I have always felt about you. _

_I don't know if you will get to read this letter or my journal, maybe one day I will show it to you, maybe I will burn it and pretend I never put down my emotions on paper. Perhaps I will never see you again - the thought of that breaks my heart._

_This is therapy for me, a way to get down how I am feeling._

_I want to hate you, but I can't. Esme and Carlisle have let me move in with them while I get better, I don't want to be in the apartment without you._

_I sleep in your room, surrounded by your things, the smell of you is everywhere, it's like you are here. I expect you to walk in at any moment and wake me from this nightmare, but you don't._

_Know you will always have my heart, no matter where you are. _

_Return to me safely._

_Bella._

My hands shook as I opened the leather bound journal she had written her words and inner most thoughts in.

The page fell open and was dated just after she would've gotten the letter Aro forced me to write when I was first in his control.

_He's gone and today I got a letter telling me he's never coming home. Somethings wrong, I just know it. Edward wouldn't just leave like this, he loves me. Carlisle and Esme got a similar letter, and they seem to be more willing to accept it. But I can't. He wouldn't do this to me, to us._

_The handwriting is his, I know that. But just to walk away after what happened at the club?_

_Everyone must think I am deluded, but there is something wrong. I can feel it in my bones._

I smiled at the fact she knew that it wasn't me writing the letter. I flicked further into the journal.

_Last night was awful, I really thought I was going to see him, but he didn't show up. The bastard stood me up and then some creep attacked me in the bathroom. He made my skin crawl, the look on his face was enough to make me want to scream. Luckily Aro, a man who took pity on me as I waited in the bar interrupted. I dread to think what might have happened if he hadn't._

_Stupidly, I got drunk, and ended up back at his penthouse. I know better than that, but just having someone not see me as a pity case._

_He was nice to me, didn't take advantage._

_I won't be so stupid again._

I couldn't read any more of that, she'd told me what had happened with Aro, there was no need for me to read about it.

I moved on to an entry from a just after my revelation at the Lake House.

_My heart is broken, shattered. Edward's cheated on me and there is a baby involved, a fucking baby! __She must be some cheap whore.__ I feel sick to my stomach. How could he do this to us? __I want to kill her._

_He also revealed everything he went through. How he can even function is beyond me. The things he has seen an experienced I can never fully understand. What I do know is, I still love him._

Tears streamed down my face. Even through everything, her love for me was there. I truly didn't deserve her.

Moving on to the very last entry, I was unsure of how she would feel now.

_I cannot believe he has left. __Actually, I can, he runs when it gets__ I understand he needs to get his head together, but why could he not talk to me first? After everything I thought we were stronger than before. Obviously I was wrong. I cannot believe he left me again, this time though he chose to. No-one drugged him, held a gun to his head or dragged him away – he just left. In a way I wish they had, that would be easier than knowing that after everything we have been through together that he couldn't turn to me._

My fingers traced over where I could clearly see her tears had fallen on the page, staining it as she wrote the words. I knew she would be hurt by this, but I also hoped she would understand I was doing this for us.

Closing the journal my heart broke, I wanted nothing more than to pack a bag and leave. Go to her and tell her how much I loved her, and how I wanted to be the man she deserved in her life. But I couldn't. Going back now when there was still so much for me to work through, to achieve, would only mask the problem. A letter fell from the back of the journal, I wasn't sure if I should read it or not, but curiosity got the better of me. My heart lurched when I saw what it was. She still had the letter I had been forced to write to her. I couldn't believe she still had this. The words were still raw and I could still remember being told to write this while in Volterra. I was stunned she still had it.

Once I was done, I refolded the paper, placing in back in it's place. Everything here was the past, nothing could be done to change what had happened, to take away any of the pain immortalized in the words. But what it did do was give me more of a focus. I wanted to make this right, for me to be the worthy of her. As much as it hurt me, and by default her to stay away, it was for the best.

Six Weeks later.

Today was the day I had been looking forward to, I was going home. Back to my family, to the woman I loved. To say I was scared was an understatement. Would Bella still be at my parents, would she want to see me again? No one knew I was coming home. I'd chosen today with purpose, it was Carlisle's birthday and there was a small family only gathering arranged. Despite having no contact with any of my family I knew this as Laurent had kept in regular touch with them, and I called him a week ago to tell him I was ready to return home. He was living up to his promise of being there for me.

Saying goodbye to the place that had been my home for the last two and a half months I felt like a new person as I climbed in the car and settled down for the drive back to Chicago. I knew there was still a way to go in my recovery, sessions had been arranged with a counsellor who would be able to work with me when I was back, to ensure I wasn't left high and dry on my return back to a normal life.

To say I was nervous was an understatement, as Laurents car pulled up outside my family home. I saw the familiar car's of Jasper and Emmett parked outside. Bella's car wasn't there so I guessed maybe she had given it a miss, choosing to be alone rather than be surrounded my my family without me there for such an event. Laurent wished me luck and said he would catch up with me in the next couple of days to give me the latest update on the case.

Once I was inside the house was quiet, so I made my way toward the kitchen, it was a sunny day so I had no doubt that the grill would be used to cook food with Emmett taking charge. As I got closer to them, I could hear their voices and laughter carrying through. Standing in the French doors that led out in to the garden seeing and hearing them so happy caused me to stop in my tracks, they were happy without me. Did they really need me here?

Watching them interact with each other, I realized what I had missed out on. I was about to turn around and walk away when I saw Carlisle walk over to Esme, sliding his arm around her waist and pulling her to him. They shared a look before they walked toward the house. I took a step back, away from the door. I thought they were going to come inside. but instead sat on the furniture on the patio.

"I know you miss him, and I'm sure if he could be here he would." Carlisle soothed.

"I thought he would've called at least, I mean it's your birthday Carlisle. It's bad enough Bella isn't here, but Edward isn't either." Esme's voice caught in her throat.

"Bella is coming though, she promised." Carlisle sounded sure. "Maybe Edward will call later."

Those words sent my feet moving forward as I stepped out. "Maybe Edward might just surprise you."

They both turned around, shocked looks on their faces. Esme started to cry. "Edward!"

"Hi mom, Happy Birthday Dad." I grimaced as I was soon being hugged by Esme.

"You should've called! I've been so worried about you." She scolded.

Carlisle put his arm around her, loosening her hold on me. "We were all worried son. It's good to see you looking so," He paused as if searching for the right word. "together."

"Sorry, I haven't had time to get you a gift or card." I joked.

"I don't need anything, just seeing you standing here is enough for me." The smile on his face was wide and genuine.

Esme was wiping tears from her face as Alice came over to see what all the fuss was about. My sister, ever one to over-react, squealed at the sight of me, causing Jasper, Emmett and Rose to investigate what was happening.

I was afraid that Emmett was going to punch me, the look on his face was unreadable. It turned out I had nothing to worry about. For the next hour I answered questions about where I had been, and what I knew about the undercover investigation.

Emmett cooked as I had predicted, and just as the first batch of food was ready to be eaten I felt the air around me change. It felt like electricity had charged it, my skin began to tingle. Turning around toward the house I saw Bella standing just outside the French doors. The look on her face was one of shock at seeing me. Slowly I got to my feet and began to walk toward her. My breath caught in my throat as I closed the distance between us. Neither of us spoke. I watched as tears filled her eyes, her hand came up to cover her mouth, I could see it visibly shaking. She began to shake her head as I got closer to her.

I stopped about six feet away from her, not sure what to do next. To my surprise and horror, she turned and ran away.

"Bella wait!" I called after her, but my feet wouldn't move, it was as if they were glued to the spot.

Alice ran past me, following Bella into the house. Emmett appeared at my side, taking hold of my arm and leading me away. I pulled away from him, but he was far stronger.

"Let me go Emmett." I growled.

"No, you have to understand what she's been through. You aren't the only one who suffered through this." He stated.

I glared at him. "I know Emmett, trust me, I know."

"I don't think you do. That woman in there was recovering in hospital following being stabbed, that madman was on the loose, then we find out he was dead. Then you leave her. Yeah, I get you needed to get help, but could it not have waited for a little longer? After everything that happened it feels like you bailed on her, on all of us. Dad was in hospital because of you, yet you hightailed it out of town."

Carlisle stepped up and interjected. "Emmett, enough."

"No! He needs to hear this, you were hurt by him. I know you said it was all part of the plan, but shit man, did you have to go that far?"

"Emmett, I've spoken to dad about this already, and I'm not sure how much he told you about what happened that night, but there was no other way."

It was hard, all I wanted to do was forget it happened, to move forward with my life. But I also knew my family would questions and I would need to answer them. I'd just hoped it wouldn't be now.

"I told you what you needed to know Emmett." Carlisle sounded mad. "But if you really want to know what happened, then I will tell you. I know you blame yourself for me lying to your guys that night, but I had to. I thought Edward was in danger I had to go to him, I would've done the same for any of my children. They jumped me, taking me to that madman and beating me up for kicks. Keeping me hungry and sleep deprived before they gave Edward a choice, one I couldn't believe-"

"Stop!" Bella's voice shocked us all. We turned to see her standing staring at us. "Don't you think this family, that Edward and Carlisle have been through enough without all this being dragged up back up and people being blamed for it. Can't you see the person who is responsible for this is dead. He's rotting in the ground where he belongs, and if I knew where his grave was I would go dance on it. There has been enough hurt in this family to last us several lifetimes. You need to move on and that can't happen if you are so hung up on blaming Edward for what happened."

I took a step toward her, but she held up her hand to stop me. "No! Don't you dare think you can just walk back in here after weeks and it will be like it never happened. We need to talk about us, but right now your family is on the brink of being torn apart over this. Emmett. you need to back off, unless you want to have to live knowing that there was nothing you could do to stop it or change what happened to those you love. Can you handle that?"

Emmett looked at her shocked, the rest of my family were also looking surprised at her outburst. I didn't know what to say to her, I could only watch open mouthed as she addressed Esme.

"Sorry, I think it's for the best if I leave. Sorry if I have ruined your party Carlisle, it really is the last thing I wanted."

Carlisle smiled at her. "It's fine Bella, honestly. Let me walk you out."

I watched her leave, Carlisle's arm around her shoulder. Esme began to clear away the leftover food and plates that were scattered around the lawn. No-one spoke. Rose and Alice set about helping Esme while Jasper, Emmett and I just stood around staring at each other. Eventually Carlisle came back outside, alone. His face gave nothing away, but his voice sounded tired when he spoke.

"Edward, can I see you in my office for a moment please?"

I nodded, following him inside.

Once we were sat down, he looked at me. "Son, it's so good to have you home at last. We've been so worried about you. Of course I understand why you had to leave, but maybe you should've spoken to Bella face to face. She was very upset to just get a letter, it brought back alot of memories for her, and for us."

"I didn't think it through properly. I'm sorry. Is she okay?" I was afraid of the answer.

"Bella was shocked to see you here, as we all were. She's gone back to the apartment." He paused for a moment. "I think you should go to her. Normally I would say not to, but you two really need to sit down and talk. So much has happened, and she needs you every bit as much as you need her."

I smiled. "I do need her, she was the reason I went away, to fix my head so I could be the man she deserves. Not someone who is scared of his own shadow."

He nodded. "And how has that worked out for you?"

"I still have some work to do, but I am ready to face everything head on. It helped, being there, getting the help I needed. I know that I love her more than anything else in the world."

Carlisle smiled. "Then go to her, tell her. Fight for her love, like you fought for your freedom if that's what it takes, but make sure she knows how you feel about her. Never stop telling her."

I got to my feet, smiling at him as he shooed me from the room. Just as I reached the door, he called out. "Don't be late for brunch tomorrow will you, bring Bella with you." I turned to smile at him and he just winked at me.

As I got into the car I knew he was right, if I wanted a future with Bella, then I had to be prepared to fight for it, afterall, I had fought so hard to get out of there and back to her. It would be a shame to fail now. Only this time there was so much more at stake.

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><p><strong>Authors Note.<strong>

Pre-read by Leigh Warner.

So, Edward is back and Bella is mighty pissed off at him. We are SSOOOO close to the end, it's all written I just need to post it.

See ya all on Wednesday, don't forget to leave me some love below.


	50. The Longest Journey

**Disclaimer. I do not own Twilight or any of these characters. No copyright infringement is intended**

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><p>Arriving back at the apartment building felt strange, the doorman smiled and welcomed me, saying it was nice to see me again. I wondered if he knew what had happened to me, or if he even cared. Once I was outside the door, I paused, wondering if I should knock or just go straight inside after all this was still my home as much it was hers.<p>

My hand shook slightly as I put the key in the lock and turned it, as the door opened I don't know what I expected to happen, so I walked inside. The apartment was empty, I knew the second I stepped inside that she wasn't here. I felt like a stranger, looking around the home we shared. The last time I'd been here felt like a lifetime ago, so much has happened. But still the memories were fresh in my mind. How Bella had invited me over for dinner, we had watched a movie together. Then I'd fallen asleep where I'd dreamed James had found us and killed her in front of me. Pausing as the memory played out I screwed my eyes closed as I tried to push it away, if I had known then just how close that would come to being true I would have walked away and never looked back. But I couldn't have known, and as Esme was so fond of telling me, everything happens for a reason.

I sat on the couch, staring out of the window across the city skyline, watching as the sun began to set, casting a golden hue into the room. The view was one of the reasons we chose the apartment, it was stunning. The sun eventually faded from sight, and dusk fell. Still, I was alone, Bella wasn't home. I had no idea where she was, and I didn't feel I had the right to call her cell and ask. Clearly she needed space, but when she was ready I knew she would return here, all I had to do was wait.

The silence I was surrounded by was broken by the sound of a key in the lock and then the door opening and closing. My heart began to pound, Bella was home. I remained on the couch, afraid if I moved she would be startled. Hearing the sound of her keys being thrown in a bowl on the stand in the hallway, her footsteps got closer and closer. I took a couple of deep breaths, knowing what happened next would more thank likely seal the fate of our relationship.

She paused before walking into the lounge, then through to the kitchen. Either she hadn't seen me or was completely ignoring me. I wasn't sure which it was. I could hear her in the kitchen, moving around. Then she walked into the lounge and straight over to me. There was a mug of coffee in her hand, which she held out to me. I smiled at her, taking it and placing it on the coffee table before me.

Bella took a seat on the opposite end of the couch, cradling to mug in her hands. "So, you came home." The words were more of a statement than a question.

"Yes, it was time. I should've called." I replied.

She let out a snort. "There's a lot you should've done Edward, calling is on the list for sure."

I saw anger flash in her eyes, along with hurt. I knew it was because of me. I couldn't answer her. Bella took a sip of coffee before she levelled her stare at me.

"Did you manage to find yourself?" She sounded pissed and I couldn't really blame her. "Or are you still looking for whatever you think it is you need. Seeing as it clearly wasn't me."

"Bella I-"

"I swear to God Edward, if the next words out of your mouth are I'm sorry, I will kill you myself." She spat at me.

"No, I wasn't going to say that." I retaliated. "But if you listened for a minute you would hear what I had to say. Instead of jumping to conclusions and down my throat."

Instantly I felt sorry for snapping back at her. "You think I wanted to leave? To walk away from everyone, I loved right when I needed them the most? You think it was easy to turn around and tell someone I felt broken, that I was scared of waking up and finding my freedom had been a dream, that I was still a prisoner in that hellhole? Or even worse, that you were dead. Then again, if I had woken up there you would never have been hurt neither would Carlisle. Both those situations were because of _me_ and _my_ actions. I have to live with the guilt for the rest of my life."

I took a deep breath before I continued. "You sit there and have a go at me for walking away, funny how you don't remember running home to daddy, leaving me here alone when we hit a rough patch? I wanted to tell you what had happened, be honest with you, but you left me."

There was fire in her eyes as she retaliated. "Don't you fucking dare compare me leaving after you came home stinking of sex, to you walking out after the hell me and your whole family went through. If you took your head down from up your ass for more than 30 seconds, you would've thought about how this would affect everyone not just me. I remembered that madman, how the last time I saw him, he'd had the same evil glint in his eye, I thought he was going to...to..."

Her words caught, I wanted to go and hold her, tell her I wouldn't have let anything happen to her, but it wasn't true. He'd got to her before I had a chance. The thought of what else could have happened to make my blood boil.

"Seeing you standing there, the terror on your face as he held that knife to my throat, I'd never been more terrified in my life. I remember the pain, and your face. I heard your voice as you held me, begging me to stay with you, then there was nothing. When I woke up in the hospital, you were the first person I asked for was YOU. But you didn't come. I knew something was wrong. You wouldn't have left me if you didn't have any other choice, but this last time, you _had_ a choice, you _chose_ to leave me. What's to say you won't do it again?"

"I left because I was broken Bella, shattered into a million pieces and not amount of glue could've put me back together this time. Don't you see, everything I'd been through, the things I'd seen, I couldn't lay that on you to deal with. You deserved better, there was no way I could burden you with what I was feeling inside, when I didn't understand it myself. It's like there were a million voices in my head, everyone of them demanding to be heard, all telling me a different thing, but all sending the same message, I wasn't worthy of you, of your love."

"You should've let me decide that, not you. Lets face it you were hardly in the best position given when what you'd been through to make a rational decision. I wouldn't have thought less of you for falling apart, I expected it. I'd made plans for us to get away, just the two of us. I was going to ask Carlisle to get you the very best of help, but you didn't give me a chance, you fucking ran away!"

"Not fair Bella, leaving you the hardest thing I've done in my entire life. I couldn't see you before I left if I did, I wouldn't have gone. I needed to get help, my head was a mess and there was no way I could stay and fuck up your life anymore than I had already I was terrified when I left, I wanted to see you while I was there, I nearly called you and begged you to come. My counselor said it was a normal reaction, but I knew I would be using you like an emotional crutch, and that wasn't fair on you. These were demons I had to exorcize on my own. To stop seeing the faces of those they killed before me, Dr Gerandy, that young kid. Seth." I shuddered at the memory of his neck being snapped like a twig. "I nearly killed my own father. You think I wanted you in that world with me? How could I expect you to love me, when I couldn't stand to look at myself in the mirror. I love you that never changed, it's the one thing I could cling to in the darkest of days, and there were a lot of them." The words became a whisper.

"If you'd stayed, I would've helped you through this. Stood by your side, wiped your tears as they fell. But you took away that choice from me. You weren't the only one who suffered through this, I was the one who got stabbed by that maniac!" She threw out at me.

"I know that Bella, and if I could've swapped places with you, I would've done in a heartbeat. If I'd died there that day, it would have ended. That is the guilt I had to carry, I thought you were dead. But you know this already, I told you this at the hospital. But still you don't understand why I had to do it."

"No, you're right, I don't. I told you that night we are stronger together than apart, what we'd been through only strengthened what we had, but you didn't think about that when you hightailed it outta town without even speaking to me. Have you any idea how it felt to open that fucking letter and see you had left me, again. That you didn't have the faith in me to be strong enough to help you when you needed it the most, you made a decision based on what you thought was best. I would've supported your decision, stood by you every step of the way. We had a relationship Edward, we were partners in every sense of the word."

One word stood out in everything she said, and it was the one that felt like a dagger in my heart.

"Were. That tells me everything I need to know I guess." I got to my feet quickly and began to walk away. "I'll arrange for my things to be collected." As I made my way out of the lounge, I was shocked when a mug hit the wall near me, shattering and spilling coffee down it. I turned quickly to see Bella on her feet, anger written clearly on her face. I looked back to the place where the cup had left its mark.

"That's it Edward, run away. Seems to be the thing you are good at. When things get a little difficult, you run away and hide. Leaving me behind to pick up the pieces once again." She crossed the space between us and was right in my face. "Go. But I am telling you now, if you walk out of that door it will be the last time, there is no way back from this for us."

I was confused, I thought she'd told me to go, that there was no 'us' anymore. Yet now she was acting like that wasn't the case.

"I love you Edward Cullen, I know I shouldn't but I do. I want to hate myself for it. I want to hate you, to forget the times my heart has broken for you, but I can't."

Tears began to fall from her eyes as she couldn't keep back the emotions any longer, through strangled sobs I heard her say it once again. "I love you."

Instinct kicked in, I hated seeing her hurt and upset, and it hurt even more knowing that I was the cause of these tears. I put my arms around her and held her to me while she sobbed. My chin rested on the top of her head and I was surrounded by the scent of her. Bella quieted down and I was surprised when she pushed me away, the anger back in her eyes.

"You won't win me over that easily. I won't beg you to stay, I'm better than that."

"I wasn't trying to win you over Bella, I was leaving, remember? Then you threw a coffee cup at me." My voice was level, and I fought to remain calm.

She then did something I never expected from her. It was like the world moved in slow motion. Her hand slapped my face, causing it to whip to one side. My hand instinctively went to the point of impact, rubbing it to try to relieve the pain.

All I could do was stare at her, I was stunned. Then she did something I didn't expect, she launched herself at me, her hands wound around my neck pulling me toward her. Our lips met and she began to kiss me. I was a little surprised, but I kissed her back regardless. Our tongues danced against each others. My hands found their way around her back, grabbing her ass. She responded by hopping up and wrapping her legs around my waist, fixing herself to me. I stumbled slightly at the change in balance and bumped her into the wall.

"God, please." She muttered against my lips. "I need you."

I pulled back, my forehead resting against hers. "This… is it what you want?" I pushed back against her, slamming us both into the wall.

She nodded frantically. "I want you Edward, don't you want me?"

"Of course I do." I pushed her, grinding myself up against her, showing just what she was doing to me, how she made me feel. I was incredibly turned on, strange how in the space of a few minutes I'd gone from fearing I would lose everything to possibly having everything.

We kissed again, this time it was more frantic and needy and her hands pulled at my shirt as she managed to rip the buttons open. I ran my hands under her blouse and over her skin. Bella tugged on my hair and I moved my lips to my ear. "I want you, but not here."

She kissed me once again, tugging frantically on my hair. There was something raw about this. I tried to move us somewhere more fitting, but I ended up slamming us into the opposite wall. I expected Bella to object, but instead it seemed to fire her up more as she let out a low moan of desire an then raked her hand over my scalp, tugging at the hair which send a jolt of pain through me. I carried her down the hallway kissing the whole time, we bumped against the wall the whole way almost like a pinball in a machine. I debated which bedroom I should choose, the spare one where I knew she had been sleeping, or ours. On a whim, I kicked the door to our bedroom open before I pinned her against the wall, accidentally knocking the lamp off the nightstand as I tried to move her to the bed. Right now I didn't care where we were as long as I was inside her.

"Are you sure you want this?" I gasped.

"Shut up Edward, and just fuck me." She growled.

I wanted her more than anything, even though I knew this wasn't the way we should be getting over whatever differences we had, but it was a damn good place to start.

o-o-o-o-o-o

When I woke the next morning, I found the face of the woman I loved staring at me from the pillow next to me with a smile on her face.

"Morning handsome." She teased.

I leaned across and placed a kiss on her lips. "Morning." Before I opened my arms and she moved across the gap between us and nestled her head on my chest, her fingers tracing circles on my chest. "Edward, about last night."

I closed my eyes, knowing the bubble we had been in was about to burst. It had been too much to hope for our very own happily ever after.

"I wanted to say that it was amazing, and I'm more than ready for round two if you are."

A wide smile broke out on my face as Bella had pulled the sheet up over us before she giggled as I grabbed hold of her, tickling her sides before I made love to her showing her just much I loved her, knowing it was time to show her with my actions what she meant to me, there would be time for talking later. There will still so much to talk about, to work out and I knew we would face some difficulties, but we needed to face this together. Bella was right, we were stronger together than apart.

o-o-o-o-o-o

When we finally managed to get ourselves out of bed, we showered and headed over to my parents house, the whole way over we were like a couple of lovesick teens. My hand was on her thigh, her hand played with the back of my neck. At one point I thought we were in danger of having to pull over so we could get even more of each other, but I knew being late for Sunday brunch at my parents would be unforgivable and it would only cause them to call me and see where I was.

As we arrived nerves finally began to kick in, I was about to walk in there with the woman I loved and show them all that we were committed to making this work. The second we walked in the front door, I could hear my family's laughter and chatter coming from the kitchen, so we made our way there. Bella remained glued to my side a wide smile on her face.

As we walked into the kitchen, Esme spotted us, taking in the fact we were quite obviously together and her eyes filled with tears as she rushed over to us, smothering us with hugs and kisses. Once she let me go, Carlisle walked over and wrapped his arm around her, pulling her away from us. Emmett was his usual self. "Woah, someone seems to have got lucky last night, and probably this morning judging by the look on both their faces."

"Emmett!" Rose scolded him, slapping him playfully on the arm. She turned to Bella with a wicked smile on her face as she asked.

"So did you?"

I laughed. "Enough! I'm sure you really don't want to know the lurid details, but let's just say last night, we talked and decided that we are better together than apart."

Turning to look at Bella all I could see was love in the way she looked at me. "I have no idea how I got so lucky, I really don't deserve her. But I intend to spend the rest of my life making up for every wrong I did to her. If Bella will let me."

Her answer to me was to kiss me, the type of kiss that was bordering on indecent given the fact my parents were there.

Emmett let out a catcall and we broke apart. I whispered. "I mean it Isabella Swan, every word."

She responded with. "I know."

We broke apart, joining my family to eat brunch together, chatting and catching up with each other.

Now, with Bella and my family around me was the time for me to lay the ghosts of the past behind me, behind us and move forward to a future, that a few months earlier I could only dream of.

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><p><strong>Authors Note:<strong>

Pre-read by Leigh Warner.

Well, we are nearly finished, there is only an epilogue to post now. *sobs*


	51. Epilogue

**Disclaimer. I do not own Twilight or any of these characters. No copyright infringement is intended**

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><p>I could only watch as the city passed me by, I wasn't here to see the sights. In fact, if I never saw this godforsaken place again, it would be too soon. The taxi driver was insistent on making idle conversation, and I was doing my best to ignore him.<p>

The car slowed as we approached our destination. I toyed with the flowers I had in my lap, it seemed strange me bringing flowers to them. It summed up our relationship, unconventional in the extreme. As we made our way through the small avenues I marveled at how peaceful it was here, but yet there were still signs of life all around me. Trees stood majestically, flowers bloomed in the middle of the desolation that surrounded them. Did they not know, not understand what this place was.

Once the cab came to a stop, I told the driver to wait for me. Stepping onto the grass, my heels sank into the soft ground as I made my way to my goal. Once there I fell to my knees, brushing away the debris that covered the stone before me. My fingers ran across the engraved letters, indicating this was the place where the man I loved was resting for eternity. A sob caught in my throat as I read the inscription, wondering who had done this, was it his parents? I couldn't think who else would.

'_James Hunter 7/7/1983 - 9/15/2010 At Peace'_

Wiping away the tears from my eyes, I laid the flowers down. I brought my fingers to my lips, placing a kiss on them, before pressing them down on the name before me. I whispered a promise to him. "I love you, and I will avenge your death. No matter how long it takes, they will pay for taking you away from me. Every single one of them."

I took a deep breath in an attempt to bring myself the calm I so desperately needed. The mask I wore could not be allowed to slip, not even for a second. The pain I felt at the losses I'd suffered would never leave me, all that was left for me was a burning need to avenge it all. And I would have my revenge.

Getting to my feet, I smoothed my dress down, I whispered one last 'I love you' to whoever was listening before I covered my bloodshot eyes with the sunglasses from my purse before I made my way back to the cab. The driver was enjoying a nap as I slammed the door closed, announcing my return.

"Get me out of here, please." I whispered.

"So, you staying in Chicago long?" He asked.

"Not sure yet, I have some old friends to catch up with. I will need to see how that works out." I replied.

"Oh, a surprise visit." He nodded.

A smile played at the corner of my lips. "You could say that, I'm the last person they are expecting to see."

Pulling a compact from my purse I made a show of checking my make up in the mirror. The bruises and injuries inflicted had faded, there were no permanent scars visible, only the mental and emotional ones, and they would never fade entirely. I had lost too much, the man I loved and our child. I almost wished I had been killed by Aro, then at least we would all be together, forever. It was clearly my penance to have survived when he shipped me off to his brother to be dealt with as he couldn't bring himself to carry out the act himself. Shame that Caius was more interested in getting one up on his brother than carrying out his orders. It was that rivalry that saved my life.

I managed to block out the rest of the mindless chatter the taxi driver was emitting, instead focusing on what my plans were. The good thing was, they would never see me coming, after all they all thought I was dead. All I knew was I would keep my promise to James, I would avenge him, no matter how long it took.

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><p><strong>Authors note.<strong>

Well, I can now hit the complete button on this story. It was my very first Fanfiction and will always have a very special place in my heart.

Thank you to Leigh Warner for pre-reading, and Dreamofrob10 for betaing when I restarted this. I hope she will be able to pick up these later chapters soon. I really would not be here, posting this if it wasn't for one very, very special person who told me I could do this and believed in me, you from the bottom of my heart.

Special thanks to everyone who has read, and reviewed as I have posted, I have loved seeing your reviews as they come in. You know who you are x x


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